by Joanne Rock
I hung back as we walked to the bonfire, hoping to reason with Siobhan.
“What if I did a double truth or something? Two questions for the price of one?” I’d learned about the art of negotiation from Siobhan. Maybe she would appreciate the effort?
“No deals.” She snapped off a tall daisy along the path and plucked its petals one by one.
I sighed.
“Besides.” Piper showed up on my other side. “We all know you secretly like Seth. So kiss him.”
“What?” I stopped and did a double-take. How the hell did they figure that out?
“Oh get over it.” Siobhan whacked my arm with the flower as we headed down toward the beach. “We all watched you two drool over each other last year. Besides, Seth’s been your friend for like… ever. How hard will it be to get him alone and give him a kiss?”
An owl called in the half-light. Seth, as passionate about studying plants and animals as I was about the stars, would know what kind it was. And yeah, I couldn’t wait to see him. He loved nights like this as much as I did. I named the constellations for him and he pointed out the wildlife lurking at the edge of the woods. Seth was strong from hiking and canoeing instead of lifting weights. What would he do if I kissed him? The thought made my cheeks warm. My braces tighten.
“You guys are nuts.” My denial made the girls laugh.
“Hello? Munchies’ Manor Rule Number One: never lie to each other—ever. Remember?” Piper scooped up a gum wrapper from the path and pocketed it. I knew she’d throw it on the bonfire.
“Yep. Own it, Lauren.” Jackie tossed an acorn in the air and smacked it with a twig, sending it pinging into the gloom.
I hung my head. They were right. Why had I thought I could—or should—hold out on my oldest, closest friends? Since I was a loner back home, these summers with the girls meant so much.
“Fine. I do like him. Why did I think I’d even try to hide it? Totally pointless. But you can’t say anything. And how am I going to get him away from the bonfire?” This was happening way too fast.
“A smoke allergy?” Trinity offered from behind us.
“I’ve gone to tons of bonfires.” I inhaled the burning, wood-scented air. My eyes closed and I breathed it in again. I’d missed that aroma all year. Nothing signaled the start of camp better than the smell of crackling birch logs.
“Or you could say you saw some litter in the woods,” Piper suggested. “And you want to clean it up.”
“Pick up trash rather than sit by a fire? Yeah, he’d probably buy that,” Siobhan drawled, her sarcasm making Trinity’s wide mouth quirk. “Just ask him to go for a walk. You’re friends, remember?”
Which was exactly why I shouldn’t be kissing him. What if I puckered up, only to have him take a sudden interest in some rare plant? Or worse, he kissed me and his lips snagged on my braces? Imagine explaining that to the nurse. The humiliation would be a gift that kept on giving the whole summer through.
“Susannah? Can we sit near the front?” Alex’s sharp nudge to my ribs made me gasp.
“Sure,” Susannah called before rounding a bend ahead of us. “Fill in behind the Wander Inn, okay?”
Seth’s cabin. I froze and took in the smirking faces surrounding me. I knew they meant well, maybe even thought they were doing my shy self a favor, but this was a full-out conspiracy. And ohmigod. There he was.
Taller than all his friends, he sat in the middle of the Wander Inn guys. Where other boys couldn’t sit still—wrestling and shoving, perpetually in motion—Seth was laid-back. Calm and relaxed, his shoulders broad compared to the squirrely kid next to him, Seth was like the calm in the center of the storm for his cabin. He was a year older than the rest of us and it showed.
And he was oh-so-good-looking.
If he'd walked into camp without his nerd herd around him, he would have turned even Hannah’s head. Seth’s nearly six-foot height dwarfed most of the guys. Plus his sandy hair with blond tips made him look more like a West Coast surfer than the son of an Indiana University wrestling coach. He loved the outdoors and he looked like he could have walked out of a J. Crew catalog, with his long khaki shorts and worn cotton tees. The one he had on tonight looked like it was navy blue a few hundred washings ago. I’d bet if I touched his shoulder, the combination of fabric over muscle would feel both hard and soft….
“Come on.” Alex jerked her chin in the direction I should have been walking.
Somehow I’d stopped to just … stare.
Awkward girl genes—you never let me down.
Forcing my eyes to the ground, I hurried after Trinity into the back row. Susannah had already left us, chatting up one of the other counselors.
“Earth to Lauren. Come in Lauren,” Alex whispered as we wound our way through some noisy younger kids tearing through the circle with their counselor. The mini-campers wore paper crowns with pictures they’d colored of fish and birds.
“What?” I snapped, on edge and self-conscious now, especially about how my braces looked. I sensed Seth’s warm amber eyes on me. Was he thinking I was a metal-mouth freak?
“He’s looking at you,” Alex sing-songed, completely oblivious to the fact that we were close enough for him to hear.
I was going to kill her. Seriously.
“Hey, Lauren. Cool shirt… and did you get braces?”
My heart stopped at the sound of Seth’s voice. My gaze flew right to his, hand clamped over my automatic smile. “Hi, Seth. Got them in December.” My words were paper thin. Barely there.
“They look cute.” He chucked me gently under the chin—big brother-like. Great. I must be practically oozing sex-appeal. Not exactly the impression I’d imagined.
My body felt hot and cold. But at least my heart started beating again. Only now, at his touch, it operated at warp-speed. My friends reorganized and shuffled themselves to ensure I sat close to him. Could they be any more obvious?
“Hey, Lauren?” Alex suddenly intervened, her dark hair swinging between Seth and me.“Didn’t you say that meteor shower was tonight? I’ll totally cover for you if you want to go to the dock and check it out. I’m sure Seth will go with you.”
“And miss the bonfire with us?” complained one of Seth’s cabin mates. They squished against us or leaned over for maximum eavesdropping potential. “There’s no waaaaaa—”
Alex’s elbow connected with his ribcage, the daggers her eyes threw silencing him.
Brilliant. Totally freaking brilliant.
Could this be any more embarrassing? But I had to hand it to Alex, she’d manipulated things perfectly. I would have fist bumped her, but I couldn’t let Seth know I was doing this on a dare. There was a chance this could turn into something real.
“My dad mentioned it,” I added to Alex’s white lie, looking around to see where the counselors were standing. Dusk had fallen and it was dark enough they might not notice us leave.
Could I really do this?
“I’ll walk down with you.” Seth didn’t even hesitate. He moved to block me from adult view and helped me to my feet.
I nodded fast, bobble-head doll style.
“Sure.” My heart pummeled me from the inside, my senses on overload at Seth’s touch.
His hands were warm and strong. “Ready?” He glanced at the counselors who were suddenly distracted by Alex. She’d leaped on Jackie’s back and hollered for a chicken fight. I smiled. Leave it to Alex to figure out our exit plan.
“Yes,” I said, while my mind screamed NOOOOOOO. Maybe I just wanted to get out of here and get the dare over with.
Then again, maybe I just really, really wanted that kiss.
Chapter Two
“What time’s the meteor shower?” Seth’s husky voice vibrated through me in the gloom. He pushed aside a low branch and I ducked beneath it, continuing down the path to the beach.
“Ummmmm. Soon,” I stalled. “Thanks for coming, by the way. Alex kind of pushed you into it. But if you’d rather go back to the fire—”
Seth grabbed my hand, silencing my nervous blather. His calloused palm rubbed against my skin and warmth flushed through me despite the cooling dark. My pulse drummed in my ear, drowning out the sound of whining mosquitoes. “I’ve missed you, Lauren. I don’t care about the bonfire.”
“Oh,” I breathed then looked down at my flip-flops. A flock of butterflies took flight in my stomach. Did he mean he missed me like a friend, or more …? God I hoped he meant more. So much more.
“Let’s go check out the stars.” He tugged me the rest of the way down the worn path, through the tree line, and onto the gravelly beach. Since Seth’s grandparents owned the camp, he could navigate these woods blindfolded.
When I stumbled over an exposed root, he steadied me with an arm around my waist that sent a shiver of awareness along my spine. “Cold?” he asked as we strolled down to the weathered dock that jutted into Lake Juniper. “You’re trembling.”
I clenched my chattering teeth. The warm feel of Seth’s palm against mine made it hard for me to think. Breathe. God. This was confusing. Why couldn’t I see him the way I used to—as the guy who challenged me on Star Wars trivia, who could identify as many plant and animal species as I could constellations, who did science experiments during his free activity periods too? We were friends. Good friends. Should I risk losing our relationship because of a dare?
We sat on the dock’s end and his sandaled foot hooked around my ankle. Our joined feet swung out into the crisp summer-night air, the sound of moth wings beating against a dull lamp above us. I gazed at the lightshow overhead. The sky was an overturned bowl, rimmed with lavender fading up to periwinkle, then indigo into velvet studded with twinkling diamonds.
Normally I had eyes only for those stars, wondering which distant suns sent those lights to us, which galaxies embedded them. But instead, my eyes kept returning to Seth, loving the way the moonlight outlined his straight nose and square jaw in silver, shadows and light playing along the handsome angles of his face. I sighed when his hand found mine again. I couldn’t deny wanting to take things further. If the game sped up my timing, then so be it. I had to take this leap of faith sometime. Better to do it quick before I lost my nerve.
I turned then pulled back when our noses collided.
“Ouch.” I laughed to cover my embarrassment and straightened my crooked frames. Smooth, Lauren. Real smooth. No wonder I was a KV. But hopefully not after tonight….
“Sorry.” The left side of Seth’s mouth lifted before the right, the crooked pirate smile I dreamed about on cold winter nights. “I was going to ask you how your year was—besides getting braces.”
“Yeah. That kind of sucked. But it’s only for a couple of years, I guess.” I looked down at our joined hands resting on Seth’s muscular thigh. How weird that he hadn’t let go yet. Not that I objected. I loved the feel of his skin.
“Guess I got lucky there.” Seth’s white teeth flashed. “Except for this.” He pointed to a small chip in his right incisor. To me the imperfection was edgy and quirky. A formula that only made him hotter—if that was even possible.
I rested my head on his shoulder, loving the clean boy smell of him and the fit of our bodies hip to hip. “I like it. It gives you character.”
“So do your braces. Especially since you used Indiana U colors for your bands. My dad would go nuts.”
I smiled, glad he’d noticed the red and white. When I peeked up at him, I caught an unreadable expression before he looked away—out over the lake.
“The bands are the only fun part. The rest is hideous. If they wired these shut I could do a pretty good Darth Vader.”
Seth’s shoulders lifted and fell beneath my cheek as he chuckled. He cupped a hand over his mouth and said, in possibly the worst impression of Vader I’d ever heard, “Lauren… come to the dark side, for I am your real friend.”
What a dork. But that’s what made him adorable…adorkable.
“I know,” I sighed. Why was it so hard to break out of the friend zone?
Fingers tipped up my chin and our eyes met. “What’s wrong? You make that sound like a bad thing.” His thumb brushed the skin beneath my chin, then traced along my jaw. I trembled at the frissons of electricity his touch ignited.
“It’s not.” Something soft swept against my cheek but it wasn’t until wings beat against my hair that I realized what it was. I bolted upright and let go of his hand. “Uck. A moth.” I started to shoo it away, but Seth gently snagged my wrist before I could damage the fragile bug.
“Careful. That’s a Coelostathma Discopunctana.” Seth separated strands of my hair while I did my best not to squirm.
“Say that again,” I asked once he’d freed the black, furry insect from my temple. Ugh.
“It’s a Batman Moth. Cool, right?” He grinned, his enthusiasm infectious.
I smiled back, forgetting about my totally un-cool grill before I brought a hand up to cover it. “Never thought I’d get that close to Bruce Wayne. I feel special.”
“Peter Parker would have been better, but let’s not start that old fight again.”
I lightly punched his shoulder. “Yeah, because you know Bruce could totally kick Peter’s ass.”
The electric hum of cicadas heralded nighttime, competing with the campers singing “B-I-N-G-O.” Seth’s chuckle joined the evening noise. “Right. Peter can swing from skyscrapers. What’s Bruce got—a grappling hook?”
Indignation made me temporarily forget my “Kiss Seth” mission. “He doesn’t need to web sling. Bruce has a helicopter—and a Bat Taser, Bat saw, Bat rope, Bat smoke grenades, Bat pellets, Bat—”
A finger pressed to my lips made my eyes dart to his. Amusement danced in his amber depths. “Fine. You win.”
My shoulders lowered and my breath whooshed against his finger, my heart a jackhammer. “Never doubted it,” I said in a rush.
“Did you like the latest X-Men movie?” He rubbed his palms against his shorts. Was I making him nervous? A thrill of excitement shot through me. It was weird to think I could affect a boy that way, especially one I liked so much.
“So awesome. You saw it, right?” I didn’t wait for him to nod since obviously he had. “That part with the submarine was sick.”
The dock lamp shown on his golden waves, the longish strands falling in his incredible eyes when he nodded. “Crazy. All of the effects were intense.”
I nodded, although the storyline was all that really mattered. I shifted my sweaty thighs on the planks. “Definitely.”
Seth’s eye searched mine, then he blurted, “Did you go with anyone?”
I blinked up at him in surprise. “Of course.”
His body seemed to tense all over, a breeze molding his tee against the planes of his chest. It carried the soothing scents of fresh water and pine, yet his expression looked pinched, his lips pressed together. Did he think I’d gone on a date? Was he jealous?
“My dad loved it too,” I added quickly and watched, amazed as his body relaxed, his face lighting up in a heart-melting smile. Wow. He had been jealous. Did he like-like me? A weightless, floating feeling overtook me while I turned over the possibility.
“How is your dad doing?” Seth leaned back on his arms, his biceps flexing. “Is he coming for parents’ weekend?”
“He’s writing a book about sustainable energy… so, lots of research. But he’s not teaching any summer courses at Cornell, so he’ll make our rafting trip.” Seth and I had been taking that thrill ride down the Nantahala River with our professor fathers for years. It was one of the highlights of the summer. I stole a peek at Seth. Would tonight be one of them too?
Seth nodded, his dimples popping in a grin. “Great. My dad’s going to come too. He’s got a few college wrestling recruits to work with but he wouldn’t miss it. Is your mom going to visit?”
Suddenly Seth’s voice sounded tense again but I didn’t have to wonder why this time. He was always polite to ask about my mother, but the fact that his mom had dropped him at d
aycare on his fourth birthday and never returned was a hurt that never healed. Not that we talked about it much. It was just in moments like now—the tone of his voice, the things he said or didn’t say—that let me know how he felt.
“No. She’s volunteering with Habitat for Humanity, installing solar panels in homes. Plus Kellianne’s bringing some guy home from college. He’s Texan.” I drawled out the last word, adding a cowboy twang to it, making Seth laugh. “She says it’s serious, but we’ll see.”
Seth waved away a buzzing fly then dropped his hand on mine and squeezed.
“Will you miss her?”
I gazed up at the stars, wondering. A part of me would, I supposed. But now that Kellianne and I were too old to need Mom as much, she’d thrown herself into all kinds of projects that used her Environmental Science degree. “Yeah. Though she’s always so busy now, I hardly see her. How about you? Have you heard from your mom?”
Seth rubbed his jaw uncomfortably. “Got a birthday card from her in April.”
“But your birthday’s in—”
Seth’s head tipped back, his eyes roaming the sky. The wind ruffled his curls, the moon caressing the planes of his face. “February. I know. But better late than never, right?”
His wavering smile didn’t fool me. I laced my fingers in his. “Sorry, Seth. She sucks.”
“She tries.” He sighed. “It’s not her fault she didn’t want me. I mean … that is … well … she just didn’t want a child.”
“Then how come she had two more with her new husband, the movie director in LA?” It burned me that she’d hurt him like that.
Seth turned my palm over and traced my lifeline, the sensation making me tremble. “I don’t know, Laur. I try not to think about it much.”
I picked up a pebble and threw it as far as I could, wishing it was at her head. “She’s a jerk.”
“She’s still my mom.”
How messed up that he defended her. Maybe it was because she was the only woman he’d ever loved? My heart stuttered to a halt. At least I thought she was. I’d never asked him about dating back home.
