Lauren started to tremble as she weighed the possibilities. More than that, the idea of embracing something she had locked away time and time again. What if it consumed her? What if she lost control? What if everyone shunned her because she became something monstrous?
Tait gripped her shoulders and shook his head. “You could never become something monstrous, Lauren.” He searched her eyes. “You are not evil. Just frightened. You must remember that you are both human and dragon. That means one cannot consume the other. They must work in harmony to protect you…to keep you alive at all cost.” He seemed to look deeper into her eyes. “And remember my dragon is there now too. Inside you. Helping you. And I am strong and in control.”
“You are,” she whispered in agreement because somehow she knew it was true. Deep down she felt a sense of strength that had not been there before. Something supportive but also a little wild. Free in a way she didn’t understand. Not at first. Not until she remembered glimpses of what she had felt before she woke up in the ash bed next to him.
That perfect, sweet bliss.
That perfect freedom.
It had been his dragon.
Him.
“I can do this,” she whispered as she stared into his eyes and courage filled her. “I have to do this.”
Before she second guessed herself, she started down the hallway in the opposite direction. While terrified, Lauren notched her chin in defiance and strode with determination. She knew exactly what door she needed to open, so she unlocked it, undid the deadbolt and flung it open.
Then there it was.
Her ash tree in Vermont.
“I’m right here, Lauren,” Tait murmured in her ear as he came up behind her. “You’re not alone.”
“But I was,” she whispered as the memory rushed over her.
She once again stood beneath the tree. She braced her hands against its trunk and stared in terror at her fingers. They kept changing. First, they were normal then they were clawed. She shook her head as her heart thundered and sweat poured down her face.
“No,” she whispered, reliving that awful day as she stepped away from the tree and stared down at her swollen stomach. “This is impossible.”
Then everything darkened as though a black cloud passed over. She was in the large cave again with the old man, Eluf. His eyes were sharp and his voice raspy as he spoke. Now she realized why he seemed so familiar. Why she trusted him.
Because he had visited her before.
“Go. You cannot stay here anymore,” he said. “They will hunt you and rape you until you submit. They will be merciless and unforgiving.”
“What of the Sigdir’s?” she replied. Like before, her voice didn’t sound like hers. “Surely they will give me shelter.”
“Perhaps they would. Perhaps they would not,” he said. “We cannot trust in uncertainties.” He pressed a double-edged dagger into her hand. “Take this and start anew. Never say who you are. Never shift again. Become anonymous. As time goes by, the dragon will go to sleep.”
“Will it ever wake?”
“Only if something awakens it.”
“And what would cause such a thing?”
A haunted smile curled his lips as his eyes narrowed on her. “You will, fierce dragon.” His voice became an echo as he started to fade away. “You will, Lauren.”
Terrified, confused, she shook her head in denial and stumbled back in fear. What was happening? She didn’t want to be part of this. She didn’t want to accept what lay inside her. But it was too late. It was taking over as she screamed and shook her head. Pain ripped through her as the world grew smaller. She no longer looked up at the leaves but was somehow within them.
Panic-stricken, she roared in rage as red filled her vision and the leaves burst into flames. Then everything shifted, and she was lying beneath the tree watching it burn. Eyes wide she stared down at her flat stomach and her normal hands.
In that all-consuming moment of pure terror, she began building the first hallway in her mind. The first door. The one where she would shut away this terrible thing that had happened to her…to the tree.
“Lauren?” Cybil fell to her knees beside her and cradled her head as tears ran down her cheeks. “Stay with me, Sister. I’ve got you. You’re all right now.”
But she wasn’t. Not ever again after that.
And Cybil knew it.
“Lauren?” Cybil repeated before she faded away and it wasn’t her sister looking down but Tait as he held her head in his lap. “Do not leave. Come back to me.”
She started at his impassioned words. How much he felt.
“I’m here,” she whispered weakly as she struggled to catch her breath. “I’m back.”
He hung his head in apparent relief before he nodded and cupped her cheek. “How do you feel?”
How did she feel? Weak, yes, but it was fading quickly. Instead, another sensation entirely was filling her. A sense of strength she couldn’t remember feeling since that day. Since the moment she started locking things away in her mind. Only now the feeling of strength was remarkably stronger.
Fierce almost.
“I think I did it,” she murmured and sat up. “I think I embraced my dragon.”
“Yes,” he said. “A long time ago by the looks of it.”
“Yes,” she finally admitted. “But I tucked it away and made myself forget,” she whispered as her eyes met his. “I’ve made myself forget so much.”
“But now you are starting to face everything, yes?” His eyes stayed with her as he pulled her up. “You are no longer in denial?”
“I do not think so,” she murmured. “But then I’ve only just started facing things, haven’t I?”
“What matters is that you’re facing them,” he said softly as the hallway reappeared. “Maybe now you can unlock the door for Sam?”
“Ah, yes.” She bit the corner of her lip and frowned. “That will not be a pleasant experience.”
“But it needs to be done,” he said. “So that we might help my people. Your people.”
She nodded in agreement, suddenly aware of his spicy scent, of his very heat. Her eyes widened in astonishment when she involuntarily stepped closer to him, and an all-too-familiar purring sound came from deep in her chest. The same sound she had made after he saved her and they ended up in the ash bed.
Mother Mary help her, what was she doing?
“Oh yes, your dragon is free now,” he murmured, the sound almost growl-like as he clenched his jaw and stepped back as she stepped closer. “You will have to learn to control it quickly or…”
Lauren had little if no control over her actions as she walked him back against the wall and rubbed up against him. Horrified, she watched her hands crawl up his chest and explore the muscles evident beneath the supple leather.
“I am so sorry,” she whispered, embarrassed but at the same time unable to stop, fueled by the fire that had begun between her thighs. A raging inferno that seemed to be flaring out and filling her body with pleasure and adrenaline. “I cannot seem to stop.”
“And I am not the sort of dragon to turn you away,” he managed, his voice rough as his erection strained against his pants. “Self-control around the opposite sex isn’t really my strong point.”
“I am not just the opposite sex,” she shot back, amazed at how haughty yet sensual she could sound at the same time. She barely recognized herself. “I am dragon.”
And she was married…wasn’t she? Yet her dragon didn’t seem to care in the least. Better yet, it refused to acknowledge she belonged to any man.
At least not a human one.
“Yes you are…dragon,” he managed as her hand wandered closer to his groin. “A surprisingly aggressive one.”
She knew he tried to control himself. He tried to do the right thing. She felt it. But the battle didn’t last long, and a lusty man the likes of Tait didn’t stand a chance.
“What are you doing?” she half gasped, half egged him on as he grabbed her backside with one hand,
lifted her against the wall, cupped her cheek and closed his lips over hers.
She couldn’t remember the last time she had been kissed on the lips. And the few times she was, it had never been like this. Tait’s kiss was gentle, tender, almost as if he relished the simple contact, the newness of it. Yet it wasn’t enough, and they both knew it, so she opened her mouth and allowed him to go deeper…to use his tongue. Typically, involving the tongue was a fairly disgusting process but there was nothing repulsive about this in the least.
Lauren groaned and welcomed the feel of his groin pressing against her as their tongues wrapped. He tasted so good. A flavor she wanted to sample far more of. So she cupped his cheeks and kissed him with more passion and desperation than she knew she had in her.
“Lauren?” Samantha called out. “You need to unlock this door now!”
“Loki’s cock,” Tait muttered as he tore his lips away, lowered her and braced his forehead against the wall.
How could she have forgotten about Samantha? Shame on her. Lauren held onto the front of Tait’s tunic, so she didn’t crumple to the floor. Forget weak knees. Hers were flat out useless. “I need to…we need to…” she gasped, struggling to catch her breath.
“Yes.” He sounded just as winded as his lips fell close to her ear. “Are you ready?”
Lauren swallowed hard and met his eyes. If she wasn’t mistaken, his question did not just apply to saving Samantha but many things. Signing her divorce papers. Moving on. Continuing to discover what desire felt like. Yes to all of that. Maybe. She shook her head, confused. She was caught up in the moment. That was all. Right? She could barely control herself let alone make life-altering decisions.
“I need to unlock Sam’s door,” she murmured, grateful to find her legs finally worked again. “We need to go.”
Tait’s eyes lingered on hers for another moment before he nodded and stepped away. Lauren felt the scant distance as though a millennium once more existed between them. Startled by the sharp, heart-wrenching sensation, she tore her eyes from him, straightened her shoulders and headed back down the hallway.
This time there was no need to turn a key, undo a padlock or even figure out a way to unseal the door from the mental fire of the past. She simply allowed her vision to go red, murmured a chant she didn’t understand and thrust out her hand. The door didn’t just open but burst into a thousand embers.
And the memory she had shut away washed over her.
Lauren knocked impatiently on Samantha’s door. She should be home at this hour, yet she wasn’t answering. Her car wasn’t in the driveway, but perhaps it was in the garage.
Suddenly, the door swung open and Sam’s husband Rick stood there. “Hello, Lauren.” He frowned as he straightened his shirt. She had never seen him so disheveled. His shirt was untucked, and his hair tousled. “How may I help you?”
“I stopped by to give Samantha these flyers for your campaign.” She looked past him to see if her sister was about. She must be considering his state of undress. “Where is she?”
“She’s not home right now.” He held out his hand to take the flyers. “Thank you for having these made. I appreciate it.”
“Of course.” Lauren narrowed her eyes when she caught an unfamiliar scent drift off him. A perfume her sister didn’t wear. “My pleasure.”
A flicker of movement in the sitting room mirror caught her eyes. It was brief, but she knew what she saw. A woman. And she did not have red hair.
Her eyes shot back to Rick. “Who is that?”
“Does it matter, Lauren?” Ever the politician and most certainly not the stellar brother-in-law she thought he was, his voice dropped an octave and grew more serious. “I think Charles has real potential for state’s attorney and I intend to put in a good word for him.” He gave her a pointed look. “And I still will so long as we understand one another.”
A crushing sensation pressed on her chest. She understood perfectly. If she remained quiet about what she saw, her husband would get the esteemed position he was so desperate for. If she didn’t, not only would he not get it but Rick would make sure Charles knew why.
“We understand one another perfectly,” she said softly and backed away. “Good evening, Rick.”
“Good evening, Lauren,” he said before he closed the door.
Lauren’s steps grew heavier as she walked past their perfectly manicured lawn and away from Sam’s multi-million dollar home. She had just agreed to betray her sister. She stopped, put her hand over her mouth and blinked away tears. How could she do this? What was the matter with her? She should call Samantha this instant and tell her the truth. Sam would do it for her in a heartbeat.
Yet what would become of Charles? Their life? Better yet, what would he do to her if she told the truth and he found out? Frightened, she closed her eyes as her body started trembling. Rather than calling her sister, she envisioned a hallway in her mind. Then a door. Then she shoved the memory into it.
Now she was safe.
In control.
Until now. Because she had just reopened that door.
When she opened her eyes, Samantha stood in front of her. As far as she could tell, they were in the Forest of Memories again.
“I knew, Lauren,” Sam said softly. “And I forgave you a long time ago, Sis.”
Lauren stiffened then nodded before everything seemed to come crumbling down and a strange sound broke from her chest. The next thing she knew, Sam’s arms were around her.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered and embraced her sister as a tear slid down her cheek. “I’m so sorry.”
“I know.” Sam pulled back and held her at arm’s length. “It’s all over now, okay? It’s done, Lauren.” She shook her head and smiled. “We’re not those people anymore.”
“No, I suppose we are not.” Her eyes went to the trees. “Why aren’t we at the Lair?” She frowned. “I thought it was under attack?”
“Sorry.” Sam shrugged. “I lied,” she admitted, not appearing sorry in the least. “I said what I thought would get you here.”
Lauren was about to respond when something brushed her mind. Like a child’s laughter on the wind. Happiness surged through her and she couldn’t figure out why until red skirted her vision and a tiny fluttering sound filled her eardrums.
“A baby dragon,” she whispered, confused before Sam’s smile widened and she nodded. “Wow, your dragon’s right on it, eh?” She put her hand over her stomach. “That would be my daughter.”
“What?” Lauren whispered and bit her lower lip as she put her hand over Sam’s. “Really?”
Samantha nodded. “Really. And she’s a big part of why the enemy can’t touch me now.”
“Why didn’t you tell me before?”
“I figured you had enough on your plate,” Sam said.
Lauren was surprised by how excited she was for her sister. More than that, she suddenly couldn’t figure out why she had been so squeamish around children, to begin with. Why she thought she didn’t like them. Where was this newfound revelation coming from? Embracing her dragon? It had to be.
Lauren was about to respond how happy she was for Sam when Bjorn withdrew his sword and took up a defensive position in front of them. “Someone is coming.”
No sooner had he moved than Tait did the same.
Where was everybody else? Runa? Matthew? Kodran?
That’s when she saw the Nidstang nearby.
Tait saw it too based on the aggravation that flickered across his face. Yet when his eyes met hers it was with confidence. Strength. Courage. And that helped.
“Is your land not guarded well then, Cousin?” Tait asked Bjorn as he held both a sword and dagger. “Because I see none of your warriors here to keep their king safe.”
“We are in between right now,” Bjorn growled. “Samantha used the magic of this place to pull you back from wherever you were. So we are not exactly in an era we recognize.”
Tait sighed. “Which means you’re likely not king here, no
?”
“Likely not,” Bjorn grunted.
“That’s unfortunate,” Tait muttered as he scanned the forest. “I was looking forward to having your men at our disposal.”
“My disposal,” Bjorn enlightened.
Tait shrugged and grinned. “Sigdir disposal, then?”
“Enough, you two,” Sam murmured as she pulled out a small sword and handed Lauren a dagger. “Any chance you’ve learned how to use one of these yet?”
“No.” Lauren shrugged. “But I have a piece of Tait’s soul in me now so that might help.”
Sam’s brows perked in question. "I can’t wait to hear this one.” She grinned and looked at Tait. “So should I be thanking you, brown eyes?”
“Does she not already strike you as improved?” he asked.
“Pardon me,” Lauren intercepted. “I am standing right here, you know.” She tested the weight of the blade. Something about it didn’t feel quite right. “You haven’t got something with a jagged edge, do you?”
All three of them shot her an odd look.
“What?” she asked, confused.
“Why a jagged-edged blade?” Sam asked.
Lauren shrugged. “I just…” She shrugged again. “I just feel…”
“That’s what Eluf pressed into your hand beneath the ash, isn’t it?” Tait said softly. “A double-edged dagger.” He shook his head. “For some reason, I was unable to see it.”
“It was,” Lauren whispered, baffled by why she wouldn’t have remembered that immediately yet seemed to crave one now.
Sam’s eyes met Bjorn’s. “Do you mind if I let her use it?”
“It is yours to do with as you wish, Samantha.”
“I’ll just be loaning it to her, of course,” she said as she pulled out a dagger and handed it to Lauren. “Will this work?”
Her eyes widened. “That’s it!” She shook her head and took it. “How is this possible?”
The second her hand touched the blade Eluf had given her beneath the ash, a dark chuckle echoed through the forest.
“Ah, there you are again, little dragon,” came the enemy’s voice as he sauntered through the forest in their direction. “I was starting to worry you might not reunite with Maeva’s blade again.”
Soul of a Viking (The MacLomain Series: Viking Ancestors' Kin Book 3) Page 12
