And would she tell me no when I told her how I wanted to grab her and do things to her she couldn’t even imagine? How on that bed just a few yards away our two bodies could become one. She would become mine and I would be hers. In that moment and forever.
I’d spread her legs wide and slide my cock into her until I came so hard she was pregnant with not one child, but two. Maybe three. I know things don’t work that way, but I can just feel it. Something more powerful is at play here. Something beyond our control.
Why wait, when we could start a family now?
It wasn’t that all these years had hardened me to a woman’s touch. I was hardened to anyone and everyone. Anyone but her and her father.
Sure, I still had plenty of baggage and there was no getting around that. I knew with her things would be different. She made me feel right again, and I would do everything to make her feel like the only girl in the world. All I needed was one chance. The right moment. I had the balls, but timing is everything.
And if the timing didn’t present itself soon enough I’d just go for it. A life of scrambled eggs and black coffee for breakfast, a sandwich for lunch and dinner and a good night’s sleep out of the rain were all I needed. Snowball was a welcome addition. I could go on like that until I took my last breath. At least that’s what I thought until I saw her.
I didn’t even know I was lonely, because I wasn’t. Not in the slightest. It was only her that I longed for. Her companionship. Her scent in the air around me. Her gentle touch. Her words like music to my ears.
I was getting better, being out here. Snowball was helping and Ed was supportive. I expected the nightmares would stop eventually. I was cautiously optimistic. It wasn’t going to happen overnight, but I’d make sure it happened. I’d will it to happen. Mind over matter.
I interlocked my fingers behind my head and looked up at the ceiling. My cock was hard as a rock and I was pitching a tent underneath my sheet. It was time to sleep. The time that used to be full of nightmares from war was now replaced with nightmares of not being with her.
It had felt amazing to have her around this afternoon. She didn’t speak much after her dad arrived, but she didn’t have to. I could feel her presence. Her warmth. The moment she left there was a void. A big gaping void sucking away the life and joy I had felt with her close to my side.
I’d only ever be whole if she was by my side forever.
CHAPTER 9
Maria
One week later
I knew I can be too emotional at times so I tried my best not to think about him. To keep my distance for a full week. It wasn’t working in the slightest.
It’s like focusing on avoiding an obstacle and then your brain taking over and realizing the obstacle is so much in focus that you can’t help yourself but run smack dab into it. And that’s how he was with me. I know he wanted to kiss me a week ago. I know he was ready to bring his face to mine. I was seconds away from tasting his mouth, feeling his tongue inside mine and losing total control.
And then dad walked in.
As angry as I was at the time it was good that he did. It forced me to take a step back and reevaluate. But this was beyond the logical process of evaluation. The heart wants what the heart wants.
And I was following my heart. I pulled up to my father’s house. It was time to tell him what I felt about his best friend. Consequences be damned. I’m a woman now. In a few more years I’ll be a doctor of medicine. The was nothing stopping me from pursuing the dream I had in my heart as a little girl and there won’t be anything stopping me now with the man I want to learn so much more about.
It had been a long day at work and I was beyond grimy. I needed to unwind first and clean up, and then tell dad after dinner. A few knocks on the door passed without an answer. I turned the latch. Locked. If he’s anywhere on the property the door would open.
It’s too far to drive to A&M just for a shower, and there are no showers back at work. I shook my head at the irony of my situation and made my way back to Travis.
I didn’t even go to his door. I knew a man like him wouldn’t be inside during the day. He’d be out, doing something with his hands. I arrived at the front of the stalls and I could hear the pitchfork dragging across the concrete.
My mouth opened in awe as this man shoveled straw out of Snowball’s stall into a pile. With each turn his chest rippling, his obliques tightening and his biceps flexing. He had on jeans and boots and that was it. If I had a camera I could have snapped a picture good enough to sell to any woman in the world. He was a tall glass of milk poured perfectly. I don’t know if I felt like a picture of him would look like a Helmut Newton black and white erotica as the sunlight shone through the small window into the darkness, or a Herb Ritts masterpiece of lines and precision. Either way he was stunning. Mentally and physically.
I just stood there watching him. The beauty of his movements as he worked. The naturalness of his actions as he had no clue he was being watched.
Say something. Quit watching him before your panties melt or you get caught.
He was breathing hard. He suddenly stopped shoveling and placed the pitchfork against the wooden wall. He turned to wipe the sweat from his forehead with his forearm and as he did he caught sight of me. His eyes locked on mine as his chest rose and fell from the effort he had put into his work. His muscles dripping in sweat. He looked like a savage animal ready to devour its kill.
I was that meal. My heart pounded in my chest. I felt as much prey as I felt womanly. Compared to him I was so tiny and vulnerable. The way he looked at me was so animalistic. No words needed spoken. There was no question how much I wanted him.
I should have said something before he caught me with my mouth hanging open at the sight of him. Now it was too late, there was no denying he knew what I felt about him. The only question was, what would he do now?
CHAPTER 10
Travis
I ’d felt her looking at me just before I finished. It was a sixth sense I picked up in combat. Somebody’s always watching, even way out here. But this time it’s not the enemy, it’s the only person in the world I want to go through life with as my closest, inseparable ally.
I could see her reaction. I knew what she wanted. And I knew she would get it.
It was time to have that talk with her. No more fucking around. And if she decided the consequences were too much, then I’d just show her. Sure I respected her and her decisions, but I wasn’t going to go down without a fight.
“Dad didn’t answer,” she says. Her words are quick and tense.
“He had to go to San Antonio for the night,” I say.
“Oh.”
I could see there was more that she wanted to say, but couldn’t. I knew it was the same thing I had to say. We needed to speak with her father first. We were both old fashioned and as lustful as we felt, we needed to at least let her father know. No surprises. He didn’t deserve that. He was too good a man to be treated like that.
“Can I borrow your shower?”
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Can she make this any more difficult on me?
“Sure. Towels are in the drawer. Door’s unlocked.”
She smiled and turned to go inside. Now it was my turn. I watched her hips sway side to side all the way back to my door. Fuck it. I didn’t care if she saw me, and what did it matter? She knew I was watching. She liked that I was watching.
It was time to put fresh straw down for Snowball. By the time I was finished she would be finished. There was no way I could step foot inside right now anyways. The thought of her naked body covered with water would be too much to resist. It was hard enough not to run inside right now and take her in the shower. She may have arrived dirty, but I could make her filthy. Cover her in my cum. Make her smell like me. Then clean every inch of her under my tiny shower and mark her all over again.
I took a swig of water and grabbed the pitchfork. Then it hit me. Shoveling the fresh straw in would put me right in line w
ith the side of my house. And what was on this side of my house? The shower and a small window for air. Fuck me.
CHAPTER 11
Maria
I reach for a towel. It’s crunchy. There’s no softness to it, just like him. I laugh. A man like this knows nothing about fabric softener. This place sure could use a woman’s touch. My touch.
I set the towel by the shower and turn on the water. I’m out of my clothes and under the water in seconds. I feel the day’s sweat and dirt washing away and feel refreshed again. Then it hits me. I smell the fresh air from outside and realize there’s a small window inches from my head.
I keep my gaze forward but use my peripheral vision. I see him. Each scoop of fresh straw and he’s facing directly at me. Staring at the window. He scoops it to the side, his glance not leaving the window. He’s watching me.
The window is no more than a foot and a half long and a foot wide. It starts above me and ends right at the middle of my chest. There’s no steam this time of year so his view is clear. He can see everything, and nothing at the same time. A tease. The smallest of tastes to wet his appetite. I know the feeling. It’s the same one I felt minutes ago as I watched him.
I imagine what he’s thinking. What he wants to do to me. I feel my pussy ache and my hand slides down, my fingers in-between my legs. I run my fingers down and up my folds and my mouth opens. A small moan escapes. I can’t do this. It’s not fair to him, and it’s not fair to me.
It shouldn’t be my hands on my body, it should be his. His fingers inside me, or better yet his cock. I know he’s hard right now. He’s so focused on me the world could end behind him and he wouldn’t even notice.
I lower my body, trying to keep the curve of my breasts from the window. Does he know I feel his eyes on me? He must. I wash up as quickly as I can and towel off.
Then it hits me. I have nothing clean to wear. I look at my pile of dusty, dirty clothes on the floor and definitely have no intention to put them back on. Disgusting.
I’ll have to ask him to borrow something. I’ll have to stick my head outside or step out in my towel. Should I just walk outside naked? Show him exactly what’s his.
I slide the bathroom door open and he’s standing there in front of me. He’s still without a shirt, sweat running down his body. I can feel the heat coming from him. He’s still breathing hard, his chest expanding closer to me with every breath.
I want to touch him. Better yet for him to touch me.
I say nothing. My mouth open in shock.
“We need to talk,” he says.
I can see this is serious. “Do you have anything I can wear?”
He walks away towards the other room. A few seconds later he returns with a white cotton t-shirt so big I could swim in and a pair of boxer briefs I have to tie off on the side to keep from falling off. If I lean forward my breasts will spill out and it will all be over. He’ll be on top of me and that will be that.
He grabs me by the arm and takes me back to that same kitchen table. He pulls out the same chair and we sit just like we were a week ago. Just like before we almost kissed. The kiss I wanted so badly I could feel the desire throughout my whole body.
But this time there’s no coffee. No small talk. No pretense.
“I can’t do this anymore. And neither can you.”
I have no intention of playing coy. He’s a man and if he’s going to respect me, and I’m going to respect myself, I’m going to act like a woman.
“You’re right.”
I see his eyes narrow as he takes me in.
His chair is angled so he fits at the table. I can see he’s harder than steel and all I can think about is him ramming his cock into my tight heat. End all the talk and make me his right now. Fuck it. If he threw me on the table right now and took me I’d be the happiest woman on the planet.
Rough, gentle, fast, slow…it didn’t matter. All I wanted was him, however he was ready to give himself to me.
CHAPTER 12
Travis
I have to be inside her.
Her brown eyes. Her rosy cheeks. Her bronze skin. Her pink juicy lips. I had to know if her nipples would match. Pink or brown? And I couldn’t even think about her pussy right now. The pussy I was going to slide my cock into once and for all leaving no doubt who owned it. Who she belonged to. Every single inch of her mine.
I couldn’t stop my thoughts. I visualize my cock slowly sliding in and out of her as she’s on her back. Her pussy dripping wet. She stares at me while I stare at her cunt.
Damn, my cock ached. Ached to be inside her. Ached to feel her clamp around my dick and claim it as hers. For her pussy to clench against me, trying to hold me in place to no avail. My speed and power too much for her. To hear her scream my name as she cums time and time again.
“There are two things you have to know,” I say.
Her back is straight as a pencil. I can see her fists are clenched. She’s tense. So am I. My desire is eating me up inside.
“I’m damaged goods,” I begin. “And we’re not hiding this from your dad.”
She just sat there like one, or both, of those things wasn’t sitting right with her.
“That’s it?”
Fuck. She was just waiting to make sure I was finished.
“It’s not that easy. This is real. My problems are real. I don’t know what your dad told you, if anything, but I’m not right right now. I’m working through some things.”
Her fist unclenched and her hand came across the table and rested on top of mine.
“We can talk about it.”
“I’m trying to,” I say. I realize my words are too harsh. To stern for a woman that’s trying to understand me. To be there for me. “I’m sorry. I just saw some things that no one should have ever had to see. Lived some things I wish no one ever had to experience.”
“It must have been difficult.”
“Difficult? Are you fucking kidding me? Do you know what it feels like to be the only member of a platoon to survive an IED? To see your entire life flash before your very eyes at the same moment you are surrounded by the people whose lives you’d gladly give your own for, ripped apart? To be the one who lived. To bear that fucking burden. To wake up every morning wishing you were dead? Wondering why you survived and who’s playing this fucking cruel joke on you. You have no idea!”
My other hand came off the table and met my eyebrows as I squeezed the corners of my eyes. I drug my hand down my face, resting it on the stubble of my mustache before pulling it to my chin as I blew out hard. Saying those words, releasing that breath was the beginning of the cleanse I needed. Talking about it felt better. There was only so much I could say to a horse. Having her there was different, not that I would ever compare her to anything else on this entire planet. She was infinitely unique. She was calming, compassionate, and although we were worlds apart in years and experiences, she was just what I needed.
“I don’t know the details, but my dad told me he would be dead if you hadn’t covered for him then. That’s when he took time off for my high school graduation, right?”
Shit. I knew he took time off, but in the mess of it all I forgot why. I’d totally suppressed those thoughts, only remembering the events that unfolded. I wasn’t trying to draw attention to myself as some sort of quasi-hero that saved her dad. It wasn’t like that at all.
“I know you’re not trying to say what you did saved my dad. I know you’re not trying to draw attention to yourself. But you have to know if it wasn’t for you a girl would have had no reason to celebrate that day. You kept our family intact.”
“That’s not what I’m trying to—”
“I understand, but you have to know that. My dad did tell me some things. Not everything of course. Some of it’s classified and some of it can only be shared between men like you two.” Her grip on my hand squeezed tighter. “I always saw you as a hero. The way my dad spoke about you all those years. That was just another example that reaffirmed everything he a
lways said. I already knew you were special, and I want to experience that for myself. I want to be there for you and we can work through this together. I know things won’t always be easy, but I’ll take the bad with the good. I’m ready. I can handle it.”
Damn, she really understood me. And she had my back. She may have been a young woman, but she could read me in a way that was wise beyond her years.
“I understand, but I still don’t think you know what you’re getting into.”
“That’s the thing. I know that I don’t know. And that’s the madness and the beauty of it. We’re going to find out together.”
“I can’t have my problems holding you back. Especially not at a time in your life that should be filled with happiness, travel, and everything else that the transition to a working adult entails.”
Worldly: An Older Man Younger Woman Romance (A Man Who Knows What He Wants #9) Page 3
