by Morgana Best
I was too tired even to have a shower. In fact, I was too tired to take off my clothes. I had called Ruprecht and Thyme from the airport, and told them the whole story about Selena. Could that woman be the murderer? Surely not. Perhaps she had only lied to me about her identity so I would do the spell for her, or perhaps there was a more sinister reason.
I turned on my bedroom light, and then walked down the hallway to the living room to turn off the TV. The rose ceremony was about to begin, so I decided it would be safer simply to turn down the volume. “I’ve just found out who you are, Grandmother. Err, good to meet you.”
The house shook slightly by way of response. “Would you mind turning off the TV when you’re finished? I’m really tired, and I’m going to bed. By the way, Alder is fine. He was shot and he’s in a hospital in Melbourne, but he’ll be back soon, and he’s going to stay here to recover, if that’s all right with you.”
The lights flickered on and off, which I took to mean that the house, or rather, my grandmother—this would take some getting used to—was happy about Alder staying there.
I yawned and stretched, and was halfway to my bedroom when there was a knock at the door. I pulled my phone from my jeans pocket and looked at the time. It was late. This did not bode well. I walked to the door and called out, “Who’s there?”
“It’s Selena,” came the voice on the other side of the door. “I’m sorry it’s so late, but I’m leaving town right now, and I’d feel bad if I didn’t at least call by and say goodbye to you.”
I still had my phone in my hand, so I sent off a quick text both to Ruprecht and Thyme. As I opened the door, Selena pushed past me before I could say a word. She showed herself into the living room.
She was clutching a wrapped bouquet of roses, and I noticed she was wearing gloves. Most people wore gloves in winter in Bayberry Creek, but certainly not in spring.
“These are for you, as a thank you,” she said, handing me the roses. I had no intention of taking them, but before I could even refuse to do so, the roses vanished into thin air, or that’s how it seemed to me. In actual fact, the house snatched the roses, and held them near the ceiling.
Selena gasped. “Did you do that, Amelia? I didn’t know you could do things as powerful as that.”
“It was someone far more powerful than I am,” I said. “And I assume there was aconite on the roses? When I was researching, I discovered that aconite is absorbed through the skin and quite poisonous. Were you trying to make my death look like an accident?”
Selena staggered backward, horrified. “No! No, why would you say such a thing, Amelia? I didn’t kill Nick. I loved him!”
“In that case, are you happy to prove it?” I asked.
“How?” Her face was ashen, her voice trembling.
“You could take off your gloves and handle those roses,” I said calmly.
Selena backed onto the couch, and then fell backward onto it, clutching her purse and staring at horror at the roses that now hovered in the air front of her.
I stood over her and crossed my arms. “I wasn’t sure it was you,” I said, “not until you came here tonight. Why did you kill Nick?”
A calculating look passed over her face. “He promised he was going to leave Clara for me. He strung me along for years, all the time promising to marry me. I found out he had other girlfriends, but I thought he really loved me, that he was leaving his wife for me. I even sold my store and moved states just for him, and then he laughed at me and belittled me and made me feel like a fool. He said he was never going to leave his wife! He said I was just one of his many playthings.” She sniffed.
“So you killed him.” It was more of a statement than a question.
She nodded, her eyes darting from me to the roses and back again. “I knew he always took his medication before lunch and dinner. He had a habit of placing it on the table as soon as he sat down, so all I did was ask him to order me a glass of water and when he was away finding a waiter, I put the poison in his bottle. It was easy.”
“And you nearly got away with it,” I said. “And I thought you were a nice person.”
“I am a nice person” she said. Her voice held a sharp edge I had not noticed before. “Nick was the one who was not a nice person.”
“How did you get the aconite?”
Selena pointed to her knee. “Arthritis. I see a Traditional Chinese Medicine practitioner, and I’m prescribed aconite for my arthritis. I went to see several so I could get a large stash, to use on Nick.” She cackled.
Arthritis! I missed that one, despite the fact I knew aconite was prescribed for arthritis, and she had constantly complained about her knee. “Why did you try to kill me?” I asked her. “What did I ever do to you?”
“I didn’t want to kill you, Amelia,” she said. “It wasn’t personal, if that makes you feel any better.”
The roses shook. “It actually doesn’t make me feel any better. Are you going to tell me why?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” I did not respond, so she continued. “I was afraid you’d find out it was me. You’re a powerful witch, so I thought you’d do a spell and discover it was me.”
I sighed. “Real life witchcraft is nothing like the Hollywood version. We can’t use magic to find out who the murderer is.”
She looked puzzled. “But what about using a pendulum, or tarot?”
I shook my head. “Selena, you should know how it works. You owned a witch supply store, so you should know it doesn’t work like that. A person’s own presuppositions get in the way of such things.”
Selena’s eyes darted wildly from side to side, and then she made a mad dash for the door.
The living room door slammed in her face. She swung around, and the roses hovered ever closer to her. She screamed, and ran around the room, as the blare from the TV, still showing The Bachelor, got louder.
As she passed the TV, she aimed a kick at the screen, and then dropped to the ground, clutching her knee.
The rose ceremony was playing. The house separated the roses into single stems, and sent one through the air. It came to rest over Selena. She threw herself back on the floor, and screamed, “Get the rose away from me!”
I bent over her. “When you knocked on my door, I knew you were the murderer. I texted Ruprecht and Thyme to call the cops. If you don’t confess the second you see a police officer, and I mean confess in full, the house will give you a rose, a poisoned rose. You don’t want a poisoned rose, do you? If you don’t confess, the house will give you a rose.”
“I’ll do as you say! I don’t want a rose!” she screamed.
Just then, Sergeant Tinsdell and Constable Dawson burst into the living room. Thankfully, the house made the roses drop on a nearby newspaper at Selena’s feet a split second before they arrived.
“I’ll confess! I’ll confess!” Selena screamed. “Just don’t let the roses near me! I don’t want a rose!”
Tinsdell and Dawson exchanged glances. I suppose it looked a strange sight, Selena writhing on the ground, right in front of the big TV screen which was showing the bachelor handing out roses.
I hastened to explain. “She came here to hand me those poisoned roses.” I pointed to the roses strewn over the floor. “You will find that aconite is on them, so they’re poisonous to touch. At any rate, she’s keen to confess.”
Selena struggled to her feet. “I’ll confess, I’ll confess! I don’t want a rose!”
What happened next was a blur. Detectives Greene and Jones hurried in the door and wasted no time cuffing Selena as Tinsdell filled them in. I followed them to the door, and gave the thumbs up to Ruprecht, Thyme, Camino, and Mint who were standing at my front gate.
Tinsdell was the last to leave. He turned to me, his face grim. “Amelia, this isn’t the first lucky escape you’ve had, is it?”
I shook my head, feeling somehow like the guilty party instead of the intended victim.
“And this time, the murderer thought she was on an episode of The Bac
helor.” Tinsdell narrowed his eyes. “She said she didn’t want a rose.”
“Err, um, yes,” I stammered. “Well, the bachelor in that season didn’t really have a personality.”
“If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times, Amelia. There’s a reason your house drives people mad. And don’t tell me it’s an allergy to cats.”
I held my breath. Did Tinsdell know?
“It’s mold.”
I nodded, relieved.
“I wouldn’t look so happy about mold, if I were you.” Tinsdell’s face was grim. “You need to get it remediated. I’ve already told you it can cause neurotoxic effects. A certain percentage of people have a genetic predisposition to mold allergy, and given her mental state, this latest murderer was clearly one of them. Luckily you don’t appear to be affected,” he added.
Chapter 21
“Ouch!” Alder cried out.
“Are you all right? Is your injury playing up?” I asked, deeply concerned. The fact that Alder had survived a gunshot wound was not something that should be shrugged off, despite what he’d have me believe. He had been staying with me just a few days, and it was hard not to fret over him. He was typically quite able, but if the pain flared up, he would need a bit of help. Besides, I was more than happy to have him around.
“No, it’s not that.” Alder grimaced. “It’s this cat! He’s out to get me.” Willow looked up at me and meowed, as if to defend himself. He was lying flat on Alder’s chest with his paws outstretched and his claws retracted, though it was clear that they hadn’t been that way for long. Hawthorn was happily lying across poor Alder’s legs, looking pleased with himself.
“I’m so sorry. I’ll move them,” I said, a little embarrassed.
“No, it’s fine.” Alder sighed. “It was just a bit of a shock to be stabbed with such sharp claws. Actually, could you maybe move Hawthorn a little? I’ve lost all feeling in my legs.” He eyed the cat suspiciously. I managed to pick up Hawthorn, and set him down by Alder’s feet. Hawthorn meowed in protest the entire time, but seemed happy enough when I released him. He curled up and lay down, purring softly.
“Thanks for all this, Amelia.”
“Oh, no, it’s fine,” I said hurriedly. “Besides, you’ve been shot! I couldn’t very well leave you out in the gutter, so to speak.”
“Well, you could have,” Alder assured me. “But I’m very glad you didn’t. So thank you.”
“I’ve made cookies!” Ruprecht announced loudly from somewhere behind me. Alder and I jumped at the sudden sound.
I turned around to face Ruprecht, who was sporting a onesie, inexplicably dressed as an enormous candle. It was at Camino’s behest, of course, but that didn’t make it any less ridiculous. Then again, as I looked down at myself, I realized that I was in no position to judge, since I was dressed in a broom onesie. Camino had insisted that we all wear them, saying that Halloween parties needed costumes. She hadn’t listened to me when I’d explained that onesies weren’t costumes, so we had unanimously decided not to argue with her about it.
Even Alder was dressed in a spider onesie. He’d had the good sense to remove the extra legs, which thankfully were detachable, but that just made his costume look like a flea. The cats seemed to enjoy it at the very least, even if Alder clearly didn’t. Still, I was happy that he seemed to be fine with accommodating Camino’s strange requests.
I had invited all my friends over to my house for the Halloween party. While we had originally planned to hold it at Ruprecht’s house, the discovery about Thelma’s spirit made us think that it should be hosted at my house. It felt somehow unfair to exclude her from the celebrations. Camino, Mint, and Thyme were also present. They were helping Ruprecht cook the food, hence his sudden cookie announcement.
“Thank you, Ruprecht,” I said. “I’ll be right in.”
I followed Ruprecht back into the kitchen where Camino, Mint, and Thyme were all busily preparing food for us all. As I entered the room, the tip of my broom onesie brushed against the doorframe and tipped me backward. I managed to catch myself in the nick of time to avoid falling. It was a good reminder to be a bit more careful.
Thyme waddled over to me. “Are you okay?” She was dressed as a gigantic piece of candy corn, her onesie constantly threatening to tip her over. If she did fall, I wasn’t sure that she would be able to get back up of her own volition. I realized that the both of us would have to be extra careful while moving around.
“I’m fine,” I lied, struggling to maintain my footing as I walked through the kitchen. I had been thinking about changing out of the onesie, but decided against it. Camino loved her onesies, probably more than anything, so I thought it might break her heart if I changed out of it, even if it was something of a health hazard.
“This batch is nearly done,” Mint said with a smile. It was hard not to be a little bit jealous of Mint, as she’d managed to score the only onesie that was relatively normal. She was dressed in an all-black onesie with a glow-in-the-dark skeleton emblazoned on it, so that when the lights were out, she would look like a skeleton—or she would if she ever put the hood on, anyway.
“Sorry mine didn’t work out,” I sighed. I had tried to cook several cookies before the guests arrived, but they hadn’t worked out how I’d hoped. They turned out exactly how I’d expected, of course, just not how I’d hoped.
“They make great decorations,” Thyme laughed, rolling one of the rock-hard cookies around the table. She wasn’t wrong, either. They had come out of the oven totally solid, but more disappointing was the fact that they didn’t even look appetizing. They looked like tiny tortured souls screaming for escape. Certainly not something that made me hungry.
“You could probably sell these as decorations next year, actually,” Thyme said, and I wasn’t sure if she was joking any more.
“Or you could use them to cut glass and rob banks,” Camino chimed in excitedly. Similarly, I wasn’t sure how serious she was. My friends were a strange bunch. Camino took the cake, so to speak, because she was back in her pumpkin onesie. Of course, this was a Halloween party, so she’d taken the liberty of carving a terrifying face into the front of it.
“I think I’ll stick to running the store,” I said, desperately trying to think of a way to change the subject. “Is the food ready?” I asked hopefully.
“Indeed it is,” Ruprecht nodded proudly. He reached into the oven, and for a brief moment I imagined him coming out with the top of his candle onesie on fire. Luckily, he returned with a delicious looking plate of cookies instead, all of which were shaped like tiny ghosts and pumpkins.
“Let’s eat!” Thyme cheered, nearly falling over as she did so. She waddled into the living room with the rest of us in tow. I deftly ducked under the door frame, ensuring the handle of my costume didn’t cause a fall, and we all sat down around the table. Alder managed to sit himself up to make space on the couch, though he grimaced as he moved.
“Are you...”
“I’m fine,” he said before I could finish speaking. “Your cats are much more dangerous than the bullet wound, even if they don’t mean to be.”
Hawthorn yawned at him from the other side of the couch, though Willow was fast asleep and snoring loudly. Ruprecht sat the platter of cookies on the table and took a seat, the rest of us following suit. Thyme and Camino both had to maneuver to sit comfortably in their suits, but managed it after several moments of effort.
“It was nice of you to consider Thelma in all of this, Amelia,” Ruprecht said with a smile. “I’m sure she appreciates it.”
I nodded, choosing not to speak with my mouth full of cookie. I swallowed and cleared my throat before replying. “Well, she deserves it. I just wish Wolff could enjoy it as much,” I sighed, looking out the window.
All the windows in the house had been opened so that Wolff could see in, just so he felt included. We’d also spent quite some time placing decorations both inside and outside the house, hoping to make it fun for not only us, but Thelm
a and Wolff as well. The idea of two constant invisible house mates was a little hard to get used to, but I thought that it was no less strange than the idea of a sentient house. Then again, it was more like one invisible house mate and one invisible gardener.
“I’m sure he’s having fun,” Thyme said through a mouthful of cookies. She obviously wasn’t as worried about table manners as I was. “Besides, look at the cool stuff we put up out there.” She waved to the garden.
We had all gone to quite a lot of effort to decorate the house for the party, and I was very happy with how it all turned out. We had the usual things, like carved pumpkins, plastic tombstones, and fake spider webs, but we also had some more unusual decorations, like a plastic undead flamingo that Ruprecht had lying around his store for whatever reason.
It all came together wonderfully, though I couldn’t help but add a few touches that were decidedly less related to Halloween, like streamers and balloons. In the end it all looked very festive and fun with a touch of spookiness, which is exactly how I liked Halloween. We all sat and ate together, telling stories and laughing. I almost felt like a kid again, only with alcohol, so it was objectively a much better experience.
“How’s your injury, Alder?” Mint asked, noticing that Alder wasn’t eating.
“Oh, it’s much improved.” He smiled weakly. “Thanks for asking.”
Ruprecht sat up straight and cleared his throat. “It is as Thomas Paine wrote in The American Crisis, ‘I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave in reflection.’”
Alder nodded serenely, yet I wasn’t sure if he was as confused as the rest of us, or if he actually understood what Ruprecht was talking about. At any rate, it was good to see Alder getting along so well with my friends.
“I left something behind,” Ruprecht said.
Even Alder looked confused at that. “Is that another quote from Thomas Paine?” I asked.
