by Piper Rayne
“Now everyone’s going to be watching our every move.” She shakes her head and sets her phone on the counter.
“So what?” I step toward her and place my hands on her hips, bending down to kiss her temple. “Doesn’t affect what we have.” When she doesn’t respond, I pull back to look into her eyes. “Does it?”
“No… I guess not. I mean, I just don’t like it.” She slides out of my hold and paces to the other end of the kitchen.
No fucking way I’m lettin’ her do this again. “Okay, don’t like it then. But like I said, doesn’t affect us.”
She stares at me for a moment and I get the feeling she wants to say something to me but is debating.
My eyes narrow. “I thought we were past all this bullshit.”
Her hands clench into fists at her side. “We are. I told you that I want to be with you.”
“Then what’s with bein’ so upset about that article?”
“I’m just thinking, maybe it’s best if we lay low for a bit. Just until something else of interest happens in town and they start reporting on that.”
I can’t fucking believe what I’m hearing. “Are you serious?” I whisper. Whisper because I’m doing my best to contain the anger that’s stacking in my chest.
“I’m not saying I want to stop seeing each other, I’m just saying maybe we cool it for the time being or keep it on the down-low like we used to do. Not forever though.” Her eyes plead with me.
“What’s this really about?” I wince and my hand goes to my side when the pain returns.
Reagan’s demeanor instantly changes. “Are you okay?” She steps over to me with her hand outstretched, but I take a step back.
“I’m fine. Answer the question.”
“Moose, you need to get that looked at. I can’t believe you haven’t already been to see Stella yet.”
When the pain first showed up a couple days ago, Reagan offered to call Stella Bailey, Brooklyn’s sister-in-law, to get me an appointment, but I’d refused, assuming it’d just go away. No such luck.
“We’re not talkin’ about my side, Reagan, we’re talkin’ about why you’re so scared to let yourself feel anything for me.”
She guffaws. “I am not scared.”
“Bullshit.” I keep my gaze trained on hers.
“I’m not. You think I’m scared? I’m not. I’ve already been through hell and back with my mom, Moose. There’s not much that could be worse than that. I’m not scared of us.”
“I wish that were true, honey.” This time I ignore the pain in my side when it flares up. I don’t want us to get off topic.
“It is true,” she says between grit teeth.
“I’ll ask again. Why are you scared?”
She stares at me, breathing hard and tears well in her eyes. “I’m not doing this.” Then she spins around and stomps off into the hallway toward the living room.
I follow behind her. “Sure as shit we’re doin’ this. Now talk to me, so we can get over this hump and back to the good stuff.”
“No. If you can’t respect my wishes, then maybe we shouldn’t be together.” Her voice grows louder.
“I’m not lettin’ you do this.”
“You have no choice.”
I take a step toward her. “That’s where you’re wrong. I let you push me away years ago, and I regretted that ever since. But I realized you had your own shit you had to deal with, so I let it ride. I’m not lettin’ it ride this time. We’re good together. I know it and you know it. And I’m not gonna let you ruin it because you’re havin’ a moment where you’re feelin’ like you can’t handle caring for someone and refusing to admit you’re scared. I’ll give you your space now, but I’ll be back tomorrow and you’re gonna tell me what scares you. Then I’m gonna help you to see that it’s all in your head. Then we’re gonna have make-up sex like you wouldn’t believe. So take your space tonight and use that time to get it into your head that I’m not going anywhere. Got it?”
She blinks with her mouth hanging open for a minute, looking like she’s at a loss for words. Perfect.
I turn to leave, and the pain in my side makes another appearance, but I keep walking.
“You’re not the boss of me!” she yells as I make my way to the front door.
But I don’t bother to respond. I’m too pissed off that she’s trying to pull this shit again, though maybe I should have expected it.
I fire up my Harley, pull my helmet on, and race away from her house in under a minute, hoping that my words sink in and she’ll see that she’s stuck with me.
Chapter Nine
Reagan
I’m an idiot. I know I am. I knew it when he was walking down to his Harley, but I couldn’t find it in me to call out for him to come back.
Something about that Buzz Wheel article set me off. I think it was the mention of love. Because ever since the meadow, I’ve been fully and completely aware that I am in love with Moose. We didn’t start over after all these years, it’s like we just continued where we left off.
And seeing the word love in print with both our names brought up all the same fears from before, and it feels like too much to handle. So, I pushed him away, like I always seem to do. God, I wish I had my shit together.
So rather than enjoying a nice dinner with him, I ignore the takeout getting cold on the table and sulk around my house all night. I try watching TV but my mind keeps drifting off to the fury on Moose’s face because of course he knew exactly what I was doing and why I was doing it. He’s always seemed to understand my inner motivation better than I do.
Since TV isn’t distracting me I decide to read, but it’s just more of the same, so eventually I go out and cut the grass in my yard. It’s not in terrible need of a cut, but it gives me something to do and right now that’ll have to be enough.
As I walk my lawn back and forth, I admit to myself that I can’t keep repeating this pattern with Moose. I need to decide once and for all whether I’m in this with him or not. And if I decide I am, that has to mean that I’m willing to be open and vulnerable with him, open myself up to the possibility of getting hurt. It also means that I can’t push him away when I’m scared. In fact, I probably need to do the opposite—I need to pull him closer during those times.
Once I’m done mowing the lawn, I head inside to have a shower and get ready for bed. My days start early at the resort, so I don’t stay up late during the week. While I’m in the shower, I think back over the last couple of weeks and even farther back in the past. Moose has always been there for me. He’s pushed me when he could tell I needed pushing and backed off when that’s what is best, always having my best interests at heart. My chest squeezes when I think of how I once again tried to push him away.
I want to be with him, that much I know. I just don’t know if I’m brave enough to be the woman he needs me to be.
After my shower, I ready myself for bed and send him a quick text asking if we can get together to talk tomorrow night before he heads to the bar. I wait a few minutes but don’t get a response. Maybe he’s just busy at work. I set my phone on the nightstand and get comfortable in bed, ready to drift off to sleep. I’m still not one-hundred-percent certain what I want to say when I see him next, but I’m trusting my heart will guide me.
I startle out of sleep when the phone rings and my first reaction is that it’s the home calling to tell me there’s been an incident with my mother, but then I remember—she’s gone. Panic makes my adrenaline fire up so that I probably sound like I wasn’t even sleeping when I pick up.
I don’t recognize the number on my phone, but I pick up anyway. “Hello?”
“Hey Reagan, it’s Liam.”
I sit up in bed. Why would he be calling me at… I glance over to the clock… almost one a.m.?
“Hey, is everything okay?” I ask, clutching the sheet to my chest.
“I just wanted you to know that I got a call from Poppy’s owner. I guess Moose had to be rushed to the hospital a little bit
ago.”
My hand flies to my mouth. “What?”
“Something about pain in his side. I only got the call so I can bring his bike back to his place in the morning.”
I swallow back the bile rising up my throat.
“What hospital did they take him to?” I pull the sheets off me and get out of bed.
“Lake Starlight, I’m pretty sure. I just figured you’d want to know.”
“Absolutely. Thanks for calling.” I hang up and toss my phone on the mattress, hurrying around the room to grab clothes.
In record time I’m dressed, my hair is pulled up into a messy top knot and I’m in my car racing to the hospital.
What if something is seriously wrong with him? What if the hospital can’t help him? Lake Starlight isn’t a huge trauma hospital or anything.
It doesn’t take long to drive there. Lake Starlight isn’t known for its traffic, especially in the middle of the night. By the time I park and run up to the emergency room doors, then straight to the nurse at the desk, I’m out of breath.
“Malcolm Tanner. He was brought in by ambulance. Is he okay?”
Her head rears back for a second like I’ve caught her off guard with my entrance, but then she types something in her computer and looks back to me. “And you are?”
“Reagan Hastings. His girlfriend.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I realize how right they feel. How stupid I’ve been.
“Well, if you’re not family then I’m sorry I can’t give you any information.” She purses her lips.
“I should be in there from when he broke his finger. Please check.”
Back when we were off and on, Moose broke his finger and at the time he told me that he put me as his emergency contact since he has no family here in Lake Starlight. I’m crossing my fingers he hasn’t deleted me over time.
She types some more and then nods. “Oh yes, I see you here. Okay, let me have a look at what’s going on.” Her eyes move back and forth while she reads something on the screen, and then she looks up at me. “He’s been moved into emergency surgery to have his appendix removed.”
My stomach clenches. “Will he be okay?”
“It’s a pretty routine surgery.”
“Will you keep me updated?”
She nods. “I’ll have the doctor come see you when the surgery is complete.”
I nod a bunch of times and walk over to one of the waiting room chairs and take a seat, rocking back and forth. Panic wells up in my chest, but I do some slow breathing like I used to do when I’d get overwhelmed with my mom’s health issues, in order to push the fear back.
He has to be okay. He has to. I can’t lose him.
I still.
It’s too late, I realize. I’m already in love with him and whether I push him away or not, I’m going to care what happens to him.
I vow to myself then and there that if, no when, he makes it out of this, I’ll be the woman he needs me to be and open myself up to him, no longer pushing him away.
A few hours later, a man in his early sixties wearing scrubs comes out and calls my name.
I rush over to him. “Is he okay?”
He nods. “He’ll be fine. We were able to remove the appendix before it ruptured. He’ll be sore for a few weeks, but should make a full recovery otherwise.”
My hand goes to my chest. “Oh thank God. Can I see him?”
“I’ll have someone come get you once he’s been moved out of recovery and into a room.”
I nod. “Thanks.”
He walks away and I sit in the closest chair. All I want is to see Moose. I have so much to say.
It’s morning before I’m told I can go and see him. I follow the charge nurse’s directions to his room and knock softly on the door.
When I step inside, he’s lying in bed, eyes closed. His color isn’t great, a little pale, and it’s weird to see him in a hospital gown, but otherwise, he looks pretty good. His eyes flicker open when I reach the side of the bed and his baby blues look a little glazed from the painkillers.
“I’m so glad you’re okay,” I whisper with tears in my eyes, bringing my hand up to cup his cheek.
He reaches up and circles my wrist in his huge hand. “Can’t get rid’a me that easy, honey.”
I smile down at him and the impulse to get the words out, everything I need to say to him overwhelms me and so I do. I just blurt it out so that the words are out there and I can’t second-guess myself or take them back.
“I’m sorry I tried to push you away again. It’s just… my feelings for you scare me. What if I fall for you and you see how messed up I still am from everything with my mom and can’t deal with it? What if you get bored with me and want to move on? What if something happens to you and I lose you?”
“Told ya, I’m not goin’ anywhere.” He shifts his position and winces.
I nod. “I know, I know.” I take his huge hand in two of mine. “I realized something when I was waiting for you to get out of surgery. It doesn’t matter what all my fears are—it’s too late. I’m already in love with you. Even if all of those things happened, it’s too late. I’d still suffer.”
His eyes get soft and he squeezes my hand. “Took you long enough. I already knew you loved me. Was just waitin’ for you to figure it out.”
My mouth drops open and he chuckles then winces again.
“You knew, did you?”
“Hell yeah. Why do you think I wouldn’t let you push me away?” He reaches out and his hand goes into my hair. “And I love you, Reagan. Have for a long time. Just glad I don’t have to hide it no more.” His voice isn’t as strong as it normally is, but I can tell he means the words.
The tears that were building in my eyes drop free and he uses his thumb to wipe them away.
“I’m gonna be the man you need me to be, which includes not lettin’ you push me away because you’re scared. We’re gonna be happy, honey, I promise.”
I nod and lean in to place a chaste kiss on his lips. He tries to deepen it, but I pull back, not wanting him to tear his incision.
“Thanks for fighting for me,” I say.
“Honey, some things are worth fightin’ for.”
Later on, I’m leaving the hospital to go home and shower and change before I return to sit with Moose. I had my back to the window in Moose’s room but apparently a summer rainstorm must’ve moved through because the pavement is wet but it’s no longer raining.
I make my way through the parking lot to my car when something catches my eye. Off in the distance, there’s a rainbow in the sky. The colors are bright in contrast to the somewhat gloomy sky behind it, and I can practically see the entire arch. It might be one of the best I’ve ever seen.
Emotion clogs my throat, and I struggle to swallow.
I know with every part of my being that this is a sign that I’m on the right path.
In fact, I like to think that my mom guided me into that tattoo shop that day and back into Moose’s arms.
Thanks, Mom.
We hope you loved Reagan and Moose’s story! Explore the series, our readers are head over heels for, The Baileys!
CLICK HERE to grab book one, Lessons from a One-Night Stand for FREE!
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About Piper & Rayne
Piper Rayne is a USA Today Bestselling Author duo who write “heartwarming humor with a side of sizzle” about families, whether that be blood or found. They both have e-readers full of one-clickable books, they're married to husbands who drive them to drink, and they're both chauffeurs to their kids. Most of all, they love hot heroes and quirky heroines who make them laugh, and they hope you do, too!
Also by Piper Rayne
The Baileys
Lessons from a One-Night Stand
Advice from a Jilted Bride
Birth of a Baby Daddy
Operation Bailey Wedding (Novella)
Falling for My Brother’s Best Friend
Demise of
a Self-Centered Playboy
Confessions of a Naughty Nanny
Operation Bailey Babies (Novella)
Secrets of the World’s Worst Matchmaker
Winning My Best Friend’s Girl
Rules for Dating your Ex
Operation Bailey Birthday (Novella)
The Greenes
My Beautiful Neighbor
My Almost Ex
My Vegas Groom
The Greene Family Summer Bash
My Sister’s Flirty Friend
My Unexpected Surprise
My Famous Frenemy
The Modern Love World
Charmed by the Bartender
Hooked by the Boxer
Mad about the Banker
The Single Dad’s Club
Real Deal
Dirty Talker
Sexy Beast
Hollywood Hearts
Mister Mom
Animal Attraction
Domestic Bliss
Bedroom Games
Cold as Ice
On Thin Ice
Break the Ice
Box Set
Charity Case
Manic Monday
Afternoon Delight
Happy Hour
Blue Collar Brothers
Flirting with Fire
Crushing on the Cop
Engaged to the EMT
White Collar Brothers
Sexy Filthy Boss
Dirty Flirty Enemy
Wild Steamy Hook-up
The Rooftop Crew
My Bestie’s Ex
A Royal Mistake
The Rival Roomies
Our Star-Crossed Kiss
The Do-Over
A Co-Workers Crush
