by Adan Ramie
Leah chewed her lip, then walked to the bisque to give it a good stir. If it burned, she would have to start all over, thanks to the overzealous attention to minutiae of the rock pop princess. "What if she does fire you?" Regret gnawed her insides.
Adonia snorted, poured the carrots in a steaming pot of water, and returned to her chopping board. She grabbed handfuls of three herbs and proceeded to chop them mercilessly to tiny bits. "Listen, if she fires me, she's an idiot. I'm better than at least half of these girls, and I have the stamina to wait out the rest," she said, motioning with her knife. She flicked the herbs into a much smaller bowl, then dumped the bigger bowl of veggies into a hot pan.
"It looks like you're making soup."
Adonia stopped what she was doing and turned to face her, eyes wide. "I was cutting this stuff for your bisque. Don't tell me you already added all this?"
Leah snapped out of it and looked into her boiling pot. "Shit."
Her partner barked a laugh, put down her knife, and grabbed Leah by the arms. She moved her to the chopping board, then parked herself in front of the pot. "You cut, I'll direct the show." She poured the veggies from the pan into the pot while Leah looked on in horror. "Oh, don't look at me like that. It's fine."
"I ruined it."
Adonia grinned, then put six beautiful heirloom tomatoes on the cutting board, and a knife beside them. "Quarter these and toss them in that pan. They just need a little sear."
Leah shook her head. "I'm fired," she whispered.
Adonia tossed the carrots in the pot, then dumped in a can of tomato paste and gave it all a stir. While it cooked, she turned to Leah, grabbed her by thin arms, and gave her a gentle shake. "Listen, woman," she said, furrowing her eyebrows and baring her teeth in a silly, cartoonish display of fake anger. "Pull yourself together. Everything is going to be fine as long as you get you calm down and help me put the rest of this together. Don't get me fired, okay?"
Leah sucked in a breath.
"And start breathing regularly. You're starting to worry me." Leah moved to the cutting board and picked up the knife. Adonia pointed with her forehead at the tomatoes. "You've got this. Can't mess it up."
Leah chopped as Adonia stirred, poured, and strained the broth. Then Leah placed the tomatoes in a pan, and Adonia moved her back to the cutting board so she could man the cooking of bisque, tomatoes, and several beautiful halibut steaks.
"You shouldn't worry so much about it. It's just one job; even if Dame O'Brien is a big shark, this is still an ocean, and there are plenty more where she came from," Adonia said.
Leah laughed, but tears filled her eyes as she chopped four kinds of lettuce for a huge salad. "You don't understand." She choked on a hard breath and turned from the food, coughing into the sleeve over the crook in her arm. When she turned back, her eyes were red-rimmed, and starting to puff up. "When you go home, you probably go home to your own place, or roommates, or a lover." She dabbed at her eyes with her apron. "I go home to my family. My father hates that I work for Dame O'Brien. He thinks I'm working beneath me."
Adonia stared at her hard for a moment, then looked back to the stove and flipped tomatoes. She checked the edges of her halibut and gave the bisque another look. Then she turned back to Leah with finality. "You're right, I don't understand that. My parents are dead." She turned and flipped the halibut, then glanced back at Leah. "My grandmother died of old age. She tried to live forever, but her heart gave out a few years ago. She was all I had." She pulled tomatoes out of the pan and arranged them in a semicircle on the pan from which the halibut would be served. Without looking at Leah, she said, "I could use a roommate. Are you interested?"
Leah's eyes jerked up from her veggies, but her chopping hand didn't stop. She yelped, and Adonia abandoned her food to wrap Leah's hand with a clean cloth from her apron.
"Are you all right?"
Leah laughed. "I'm so stupid," she said, and looked up. With their faces only inches apart, their eyes met. Adonia's lips parted as Leah leaned forward, and her eyes started to glaze with need.
A metal something clanged a few feet away and caught their attention, and they both turned to find Alice on the floor wrestling dripping brownie batter back into a giant silver mixing bowl. She looked up at them, then at others, and found everyone in the kitchen staring at her, then burst into tears. Adonia swore softly, then dropped Leah's hands and walked toward Alice.
"Leave me alone!" Alice said through tears, but Adonia didn't listen. She walked past the crying woman to a full mop bucket. She nudged the girl with her toe, and Alice stood.
"Move your bowl." Adonia mopped up the batter, replaced the mop bucket, and brought back a Wet Floor sign for good measure. "Next time…" She moved close to Alice and lowered her voice. She stood beside her a long moment, still talking, but Leah didn't catch most of what was said.
When Adonia came back, Leah had bandaged her finger and was back to chopping vegetables. Adonia rescued the halibut from the purgatory of burned entrees just in time, and plated it with the tomatoes. She squirted a generous amount of lemon juice over the whole thing, arranged lemon slices around the plate, then wrapped it and pushed it to the side. The bisque she mixed, added the last of the ingredients, then turned down the heat.
"Have you thought about my offer?"
Leah didn't even stop to think about it. As much as she wanted to make her parents proud, she wanted a successful career more, and she was willing to bet she would do well with a driven roommate like Adonia. "I accept." She scooped the last of the veggies into the giant salad bowl, dressed it all with a vinaigrette, then wrapped it and put it near the halibut. "Are you sure you want someone you barely know as a roommate?"
Adonia snorted, and Leah turned to her, eyebrows creased, a pout on her dark lips. "Lesbians move in together after their first dates all the time. I don't think you're a psycho or anything."
"Famous last words…"
6
The event went off without a hitch. The pop-rock princess, Betheny Clement, spent a fair share of her time mingling, laughing her fake, society laugh at good and bad jokes and keeping a demure smile ready for anyone who suggested anything untoward of her. Adonia thought she almost looked elegant.
Alice and her partner manned one side of the food, while Adonia and Leah manned the other. Guests were treated to a veritable smorgasbord, from hors d'oeuvres and salad, to fish and bisque, and finally to six kinds of velvety or crispy desserts. In a lull, Alice made her way over, and Leah nudged Adonia to get her attention.
"I wanted to let you know what was happening." Alice leaned forward, her eyes darting around to make sure she wasn't heard, like a girl whispering secrets in a high school locker room. "This will probably be the last normal party for the Bitez tour."
Adonia frowned. "Okay." She straightened, arms behind her back, and looked at Alice, her eyes glancing to Betheny now and then as she waited for Alice to go on.
Alice pursed her lips. "Listen, I know we have bad blood. That's fine. But you did me a favor today, and I owe you, and I don't like to owe any debts. So this is how I'm going to repay you."
"In gossip?" Leah asked.
Alice glared at her, then turned back to Adonia. She spoke through gritted teeth. "It's a warning. My friend Cindy worked for Dame O'Brien when she did the last Betheny Clement tour, Lickz. Her partner last time was a holdover from the previous tour. She warned her that Betheny was going to snap at some point. She would have a really classy party, then fall into a kind of deep depression. Either she fired everyone, or she just went bananas."
"What do you mean by 'bananas,' exactly?" Adonia asked, watching Betheny give Leah a lascivious stare-down.
"She went on some kind of drug binge, tried to get herself arrested, or ruined her own concerts - anything to get attention." Alice glanced away, caught the eye of her partner, and then looked back at Adonia. "I just wanted to warn you before it went down." She turned and walked away.
&n
bsp; Adonia looked at Leah trying to avoid Betheny's stare, then lowered her head so no one could see her talking. "What do you think?" she murmured.
"As much as I hate to say it, I think she's right," Leah whispered, turning her face away from Betheny's hungry eyes. "She's been trying to get my attention all night."
Betheny's eyes met Adonia's as she looked her way, and Adonia had the distinct impression that she was being sized up by a predator. "Wonderful," she murmured back, and vowed to herself to keep busy for the rest of the night. "Here's hoping we still have jobs in a week."
Leah dropped her hands to her hips. "There is no way I'm going to let her steal this opportunity from me. Spoiled brat or not, I'm keeping this job, and there's nothing she can do to stop me."
Adonia admired her pluck, but couldn't help starting to revise and update her resume in her head. Even if it was only a month, working for Dame O'Brien on a Betheny Clement tour had to mean something to her future employers. She just had to keep on Betheny's good side until it all blew over.
Dame O'Brien rubbed her temples while one of the stronger women on her crew ground an elbow into the tense muscles of her thin, ramrod back. The old woman groaned. The young cook let up and was rewarded with a string of obscenities in what Adonia thought was Gaelic warning her not to stop. The massage continued with fervor as the other crew members looked on.
"Has this really happened before?" a girl to Adonia's left asked. Dame nodded her head through her brutal massage. "There's nothing we can do?"
"It's settled," the crone said, and swatted the impromptu masseuse away. She turned her bloodshot eyes up to her crew. "Betheny is going to cancel the last half of the tour."
"Isn't there anything we can do to stop it?" Leah asked.
Dame O'Brien grunted. "Maybe, if you can work magic."
"What kind of magic?" Adonia asked, stepping forward. Leah matched her step.
The Dame turned her eyes up to stare at the women, and her look of disgust turned almost to hope as her gaze fell on Leah. "There might be one way to stop this depression in its tracks."
Leah groaned. "I don't think I like where this is headed."
Dame O'Brien tutted at her. "Surely you're willing to, shall I say, take one for the team?"
"Do you think that's a good idea?" Adonia asked.
She had to admit, she was worried not only for the state of the tour, but for the tentative bond she had forged with Leah. Leah wasn't like her. She wasn't pigheadedly willful and strong. She was easily swayed and prone to bouts of self-deprecation, and while those traits were starting to grow on Adonia, they didn't bode well for whatever hell their employer was scheming.
"I think it's an amazing idea," the Dame said. She pushed away from the counter and took a few steps toward Leah. "Ms. Clement likes you. Everyone saw her staring at you during the party."
"And you're gay," piped in Alice from across the room. Adonia glared in her direction, and she dropped her head.
"Are you asking me to sell myself?" Leah's voice was soft but incredulous. For a moment, Adonia wondered if maybe she had her all wrong. Maybe Leah was stronger than she thought. Perhaps she would turn Dame O'Brien down and prove she had what it takes to make it in a hard-hitting business.
Dame O'Brien stopped as if she had been slapped, and her voice took on a squawking quality as she raised her hand to her face. "I would never suggest that." Her hand wavered near her mouth for a moment before she clenched it in a fist and dropped it to her side. When the old woman spoke again, her voice was husky and her eyes were shifty. She didn't look either of them in the eyes. "You just have to keep her interested. Sweeten the pot, as it were."
Leah chewed the inside of one of her thumbs and looked from Dame O'Brien's face to Adonia's. Dame O'Brien's eyes were wide like a child staring in a sweet shop window. Adonia knew her face was stony and sullen. Leah turned back to her employer. "How am I supposed to do that?"
Adonia's heart sunk.
Dame O'Brien clapped her hands together. "I knew I could count on you." She turned her face to Adonia. "And you," she said, her voice back to business. "I need you as a sort of bodyguard."
Alice and the clique of girls gathered around her all broke out in snickers. Dame O'Brien sent them a withering stare, and they closed their mouths, but kept their childish grins. Adonia crossed her arms over her chest.
"What makes you think I want to be your bodyguard?"
Dame O'Brien looked at her for a moment as if she had grown two heads, then chuckled mirthlessly. "Dear, I don't need a bodyguard. She does." She pointed one gnarled hand at Leah. "You're going to keep her out of harm's way. We'll dangle the bait, but we don't want the big fish to actually gobble her up."
Adonia sighed and rubbed a hand over her forehead. She knew she had to do it. Even if Dame O'Brien hadn't wanted her to do it, she knew had to protect Leah, who looked like she would rather die than be the scent to draw in the shark even as she was agreeing to do just that. Dame O'Brien smiled at her and clapped her on the shoulder.
"Not a hair on her head will be hurt," the old woman mumbled at her. "You'll make sure of that, won't you?"
7
Adonia adjusted the rolled sleeve of her hunter green button-down, shifted from one foot to the other, and crossed her arms. She leaned against the wall by the door of Betheny's dressing room, waiting for the singer to make her appearance. It had been two hours since she had made the announcement about the tour. Adonia pulled out her phone and checked the time, then worked it back in the pocket of her dark jeans. When Leah walked around the corner, she stood taller.
Leah walked with noticeable discomfort in strappy gold heels. Even as she made her way over to where Adonia stood, she tugged down the brown leather skirt encasing her thin legs with one arm, and wrapped the other around the gold halter top with the shiny fringe that begged attention to her exposed skin.
"You look amazing," Adonia said, and patted her on the shoulder awkwardly. "And really uncomfortable."
Leah cast a glance down her body at the clothes the crew had picked for her, and let out a cry. "My father would kill me."
Adonia bit her lip and tried to look anywhere but at the silky, brown skin peeking out from every part of the outfit. She settled on the necklace Leah wore. "Turquoise. Original."
"I look like the daughter of Red Cloud and Heidi Fleiss," Leah said. Adonia didn't get a chance to answer, as the door opened, and out walked Betheny Clement.
Or, rather, four versions of Betheny, each dressed in coordinating shades of her trademark shimmering bright pastels. Adonia had to study them to notice the subtle differences that one could only see if inspecting them closely in good lighting. Whoever she had doing makeup was some kind of miracle worker.
"How do we look?" the Betheny in the back asked, and Adonia realized she was the original. The others were simply copies created to cloak the celebrity in eccentricity.
"Whoa," Leah said, and the Bethenys all looked her way. She took a step back as the original slunk forward with a sly grin.
"Well, don't you look delicious?"
She had almost reached Leah when Adonia pushed away from the wall and cleared her throat for attention. Betheny looked at her through narrowed eyes. The other Bethenys turned her way, and the feeling was anything but a good one.
"I think we need to get going, don't we? We don't want to miss the show."
Betheny's face broke into a slow smile. "That's right. Drag Hag Bitch Fest!" She slapped Adonia on the shoulder. Adonia gritted her teeth in a fake smile.
"And the main show is going to start in an hour," Adonia added. "We need to go."
Betheny wrapped her arm around Leah's bare shoulders and propelled her forward. Leah shot Adonia a panicked look, but all Adonia could do was hold up her hands in a gesture of complete powerlessness. She followed behind the Bethenys, one of whom was giving her a look of not so subtle curiosity, and tried to keep close to Leah's back.
The
y piled into a cramped elevator, and Adonia was thankful that none of the Bethenys weighed over a hundred pounds soaking wet. When they reached the ground floor, the Betheny in pink led the way out the door into the flashes of cameras. She smiled and posed as the other Bethenys slid, heads bowed, into the waiting stretch Hummer with Leah and Adonia. Adonia was shell shocked and wary of the publicity, and Leah's pinched face said she felt the same way.
The bar turned out to be just as gaudy, loud, and orgiastic as the show's name promised. Betheny grabbed a gopher when they got inside, and he bounced over to the bar with their large drink order. The group had only just settled in a proffered VIP room when their drinks came. When the glistening boy handed Adonia a shot glass, she tried to hand it back.
"No, Betheny said everyone gets one, so everyone gets one," he said, his smile wide, but his eyes filled with malice. He lowered his voice. "Bitch, don't get me kicked out." He raised his shot glass, shot a pointed look in her direction until she raised hers. "Ladies, tonight we are going to get fucked up and get lucky," he announced, then tossed it back.
The Betheny copies drank theirs down, and Adonia matched them. When she put her glass back onto the table and picked up the beer, she noticed Leah and Betheny talking quietly away from the others. Both still had full shot glasses in their hands. Leah was looking in Adonia's direction, and Betheny was trying to block Leah's view with her body. Adonia took the cue and walked over, leaving the pouting Betheny copy to order more drinks.
"Something wrong?" Adonia asked. She cut an eye at Leah, who trembled even in the heat.
Betheny sighed, tossed back her shot, and slammed her glass onto the table in front of them. "Leah doesn't want to drink tequila." She raised her voice over the music.
