Never Standing Still

by Anie Michaels

  “No, I live in Seattle when I’m not working.”

  “I’ve never been there.”

  “Oh, well, it’s a fun city. You know, Space Needle and all.”

  “And the guys who throw fish are there.”

  I laughed. “True.”

  “Maybe someday I’ll make a trip to see those guys.”

  “I’m sure they’d be happy to see you. They might even let you catch a fish.”

  “They do that?” he asked, sounding almost like a little boy, so excited at the thought of catching a fish being hurled at him through the air.

  “Sometimes. But it’s usually for a special occasion. It’s not something they just let anybody do. It’s kind of a big deal.”

  “Hmmm.” He sounded like he was trying to figure out a puzzle, trying to come up with a plan to get them to let him catch one of their fish.

  I took a deep breath and knelt to the ground, softly landing on my knees in front of him, trying to keep the blush from my face. I pretended to look at the ground as I closed my eyes and took another hopefully silent deep breath. I’d never had a moment I could remember where I was so flustered by someone I was working with, but kneeling in front of Riot, being this close to him and in such a vulnerable position, had my blood thrumming through my veins.

  I looked back up, determined to remain professional, and wrapped the tape measure around his waist.

  “How does one become a costume designer?” he asked, softly. I was grateful for his question, glad it took my mind off his body in front of me.

  “I went to college, got a degree in costume design,” I looked up at him and gave a wink, trying for sassy. He smiled and it felt like a reward, making my stomach flip. I wanted to earn more smiles from him.

  “Which college?”

  “Art Institute of Seattle. Well, I finished in Seattle. I started in New York.”

  “Then you moved in the middle of college? Why?”

  I wrote a note on my pad and then moved to measure his inseam, hoping to God he didn’t see or feel my hands trembling. “Circumstances. Can you drop your arms?”

  “Well, that’s not vague at all,” he said, flopping his hands back down to the sides of his waist.

  “How’d you get started in acting?” I was hoping he’d take the bait and allow the change in subject. Luckily for me, he was agreeable.

  “I started as a model actually. It was really kind of stereotypical. I was just at the mall with some of my friends and this woman approached me and asked if I’d ever considered modeling.”

  I wrote down his inseam measurement and tried to gracefully get to my feet. He noticed me start to rise and held out a hand. I took it before I could think better of it and my heart thumped rapidly as he pulled me up off the floor effortlessly. I was on my feet in a nanosecond and his impressive strength was just another tally in the “Reasons Riot is Attractive” column.

  “I signed with a modeling agent and after a few shows, and a few campaigns in some popular magazines, people started calling asking me to audition for small roles.”

  “Sounds exciting,” I said as I put my tape measure away. “What size shoe do you wear?” I asked as my eyes flitted to his feet.

  “Fourteen.”

  “Oh, my,” I said breathily, then immediately clamped my hand over my mouth.

  Riot laughed. “I know, they’re huge.”

  I coughed, trying to camouflage my outburst. This man did nothing but fluster me and I had no idea how to make it stop. The last thing I needed was a bad reference because I couldn’t keep my mouth from uttering the most asinine comments about the size of a man’s feet. And thinking about the size of his feet only made me think about the size of his…. Oh, for goodness’ sake! This was enough. I had to get out of there.

  “Well, I think I’ve got all I need. We should probably get back to George and Lexi.” I said, not nearly as coolly as I would have liked.

  He smiled at me as if he knew I was flustered and he kind of liked it. Yup. Out of there. “All right.”

  I packed up my things and walked out of the trailer in a way that would make a bystander think it were on fire. I heard the door close after me, but didn’t stop to see if Riot was following or not. I just kept walking until I was inside the studio and found George and Lexi on the soundstage, almost exactly where we’d left them.

  “All finished,” I said, a little too loudly.

  George’s eyes met mine and then dashed behind me to where I was sure Riot was standing because I could feel his presence like a heat wave radiating from him, washing over me. It was an unnerving feeling, but also brought a certain warmth I wasn’t necessarily opposed to.

  “Great. You both know call time tomorrow’s at seven?”

  “Yes, your receptionist gave me the call sheet. I’ll be here.”

  “Me too.” I heard his wonderfully warm and low voice from behind me, sending a shiver up my spine.

  “Thanks, Riot, for coming on such short notice, we really appreciate it,” George said nicely, but without a smile.

  “It’s going to be the best video, I just know it,” Lexi said with her usual enthusiasm.

  “I’m just thankful for the opportunity,” Riot replied, with sincerity.

  “Okay, we’ll see you both tomorrow then.”

  We all walked to the front of the building and I pulled out my phone to call Ella. George and Lexi both climbed into what I assumed was his Audi, and they drove away.

  “You need a ride?” Riot’s smooth and dark voice floated through the darkness and I couldn’t help but look up at him. Even in the absence of light his eyes shone, the gold color of them almost glowing in the darkness.

  “Um, no, I’ve got a ride. I just need to text her.” I pried my eyes away from his to send that text to Ella.

  “Listen, I know we don’t know each other very well, but I’m not about to leave a woman alone, in the dark, in a parking lot, in the middle of the city.”

  Ella responded to my text saying she was on her way and would be there in five minutes. I held the phone up to him. “My ride will be here soon. It’s no big deal.”

  “It’s a big deal to me. I’ll wait with you.”

  “Okay,” I managed to squeak out, his protective comments doing nothing to lessen my attraction to him.

  “So,” he said as he leaned back against the brick wall of the building, propping one foot up, hands in his pocket, completely unaware that he was embodying every high school fantasy any girl ever had. “How long have you been doing this?”

  “Almost ten years. I started right out of college at twenty-one.”

  “So you’re thirty?”

  “Ish.”

  He laughed, dragging his hand over his smile again, then rubbed the underside of his chin with the back of his hand. I couldn’t explain why it turned me on, other than the fact that it was the most masculine thing I’d ever seen any man do. Hands, stubble, chin, fingers… Jesus.

  “You won’t tell me how old you are?”

  “Gentlemen aren’t supposed to ask women their age.”

  “I guess that’s true. I’m twenty-seven, in case you were curious.”

  I was curious. I tried to let my mind wrap around his age and figure out if I was bothered by the fact that he was younger than me. I determined, in that moment, that it didn’t bother me, but I also determined that it didn’t matter. His age was unimportant because he was just a guy I was working with. Nothing more.

  “Just a baby,” I teased.

  He laughed and I felt my cheeks bunch up from smiling. His happiness was contagious and I wanted to catch it. “How long are you in town for?”

  “Just for the shoot. I drove down this morning and I’ll stay until it’s done, but then I’ll probably go back to Seattle.” I paused and looked him in the eyes, still glistening in the darkness. “You?”

  “Well, I’m here for the shoot, but I don’t have another job until next month, so I only bought a one-way ticket. Figured I’d go back when
ever I wanted to. Thought maybe I’d check out the city.”

  “Portland’s pretty great. My friends live here so I come here sometimes when I’m not working to see them.”

  “Oh yeah? So you’d make a decent tour guide?”

  “Well,” I paused, “I’m not sure about that. We don’t want the blind leading the blind.”

  “You wouldn’t take an extra day to help me out? You don’t want me wandering around a strange city by myself, do you?”

  “Something tells me you’d be just fine by yourself,” I said through a laugh, purposefully looking out toward the road, not wanting to be trapped by his gaze any longer, hoping Ella showed up soon. I knew I’d only be able to deny him for so long.

  “I might be fine by myself, but it doesn’t mean I want to be alone.” His words, which had been playful before, were now serious and filled with hidden meaning. We were stuck in the silence, staring at each other, and when I opened my mouth to relent, to give in to him and promise to spend a day with him, I heard a car pull up. I turned and saw Ella behind the wheel of my Rover. I turned back to Riot, whose face had returned to the playful, at ease expression he’d had since we’d met.

  “That’s my ride. Thanks for waiting with me.”

  “Anytime, Kalli. I’ll see you later.” He didn’t move, didn’t budge from his stance leaning against the wall, just watched me climb into the passenger seat of my car. “Do you need a ride somewhere?” I asked once I was in the car, door still propped open.

  He shook his head. “No thanks. My rental car is here, but I think I’m gonna take a walk and find a bar to have a drink.” I smiled and gave him a small nod before turning all the way into the car and shutting my door.

  “Hey. Who’s that ridiculously handsome guy watching your ass as you got into your car?” Ella asked, ever observant.

  “That’s the male lead for the video.”

  “Huh. He’ll do,” she said with disinterest. I laughed. I figured that next to her boyfriend Porter, any and all guys seemed like they’d just “do.”

  Chapter Four

  Impossible to Turn Away

  The next morning I found myself at the studio at seven sharp. I’d been given my own trailer to dress the talent and even my very own assistant for the day, Savannah. She was an intern at the studio who was majoring in costume design at a local university, and she was a dream. I felt spoiled having her, even if she insisted I call her Savvy, which I didn’t.

  I dressed all the extras first, which was the easy part. They were like background noise, they didn’t need to be flashy or impressive, they just needed to blend in. My main focus was Lexi and Riot.

  When Lexi came in to be dressed, she already looked amazing. Her make-up was flawless with dark eyes and red lips, her skin pale as if she hadn’t seen the sunlight in years. Her hair was tall and teased, looking messy and chaotic, yet tamed below the headband I’d provided for her hair stylist. A pair of old-fashioned flying goggles sat on the crown of her head, and seeing them there, I knew I’d made the right decision. I could imagine the rest of her costume on her and knew the goggles were going to be perfect.

  “Hey, Kalli, I’m ready to look amazing,” Lexi exclaimed, standing in the middle of the wardrobe trailer.

  “Great, let’s get started.”

  Thirty minutes later I was nearly bursting with satisfaction as Lexi stood in front of me in full costume. She not only looked amazing, but she looked the part.

  “You nailed it, Kalli. It’s outstanding.”

  I nodded, walking around her, looking for any last minute thing I could do or fix. She needed to look perfect.

  Lexi wore a white cotton dress, which hanging by itself on the rack looked sweet and innocent. But I’d imagined it otherwise, and it paid off, because the dress no longer looked like that of a farmer’s daughter. It looked a little dangerous and a lot dystopian. The white cotton dress had a sweetheart neckline, but paired with the black, lacy push-up bra, it lost a little bit of its innocence.

  I left the top two buttons undone, making the bra just barely visible, but not trashy. Wrapped around her tiny waist were black and brown straps of leather that had silver and brass buckles in the middle, looking haphazard and almost necessary, as if she’d put them there to actually hold her dress up, not just as a fashion statement. The dress wasn’t too short, but she did have a garter belt on under it and the straps came down to latch on to thigh-high stockings that had thick black and brown vertical stripes, paired with brown knee-high boots.

  She wore black fingerless leather gloves, and had a long silver chain hanging between her breasts with a compass dangling low. I’d also supplied the hair stylist with white, brown, and black ribbons that had been braided into her hair, like little peekaboos poking out from the back.

  She looked soft yet hard, beautiful, sexy and every bit the steampunk princess.

  The door opened and Riot walked up the small set of stairs. His eyes found Lexi first, and even though she looked like a punk rock sex kitten, his eyes only stayed on her for a moment before they found me. It was when he saw me that he smiled.

  “Riot, what do you think?” Lexi asked, spinning in a slow circle.

  Riot looked back at her, but then said to me as his eyes met mine again, “You did a great job.”

  “Thanks,” was all I could manage under his appraising eyes.

  “Well, I’m headed to the set. See you both in a few,” Lexi said, chipper as ever, exiting the trailer.

  “You ready?” I asked, turning back to the rack filed with now-empty hangers and his costume.

  “As I’ll ever be.”

  I grabbed his hanger and turned back to him, holding it out. “You can dress in the bathroom there,” I said, nodding toward the door behind him. He took the costume from me and went to change. While I was trying to regain my nerves, thrown off balance by Riot and his attention, the door to the trailer opened and Savannah entered.

  “George wanted me to let you know he wants everyone on set in fifteen.”

  “No problem. Can you do me a favor and do one last check of all the extras? Make sure all their buttons are buttoned and buckles are buckled?”

  Savannah laughed. “Yeah, they had a lot of buckles.”

  “Yeah,” I said as I smiled. “And make sure to check their shoes. I don’t want anything left undone.”

  “No problem,” she said, then made her way back to the set. The bathroom door opened and Riot came out. He’d left his shirt wide open and the sight of his bare chest, even just the small part I saw, was enough to make my breath falter.

  “Can I leave my clothes here?” He asked, looking around for a place to leave his bag.

  “Uh, yeah, sure. Just put it on the couch there,” I said, pointing behind him.

  When he placed his bag on the couch I couldn’t help but notice how well the brown leather pants he was wearing fit his ass. He bent at the waist and I absolutely could not keep my eyes from his rear. When he stood, my eyes darted away and I tried to justify checking him out as part of my job; I had to make sure his pants fit, right?

  On set, I watched as Lexi sang and danced, all the while Riot did his job looking sexy in the background. He was wearing some heavy guyliner and, even though I usually wasn’t into the look, his eyes penetrated through the smoke and fog of the set, making it nearly impossible to turn away. Part of Lexi’s choreography called for her to caress Riot, to walk around him trailing her hand over his partially exposed abdomen, and I couldn’t help but want to trade places with her for just one of those takes.

  I found myself focusing on unnecessary distractions to keep my eyes from traveling to him, his attraction was that powerful. I was adjusting ties and goggles on extras, checking buttons, Googling ‘steampunk chic’ and not Riot Bentley.

  After an hour or so of getting the same sequence from all different angles, George announced we were moving to the bedroom set, and I swallowed hard. I picked up the case I used on sets that had anything and everything I coul
d possibly need on-the-go, sort of like a sewing kit on steroids, and moved with the rest of the crew to the set built just on the other side of the sound stage.

  I watched as George gave direction to Riot and Lexi, wondering if he was feeling any splinter of jealousy, telling another man, a younger, arguably more attractive man, to practically dry-hump his girlfriend on a bed.

  There was a camera shooting from directly over the bed and as Riot kissed and nuzzled her neck, Lexi sang to the camera about how she knew he only wanted this one night, how she’d do anything to make him stay, questioning what she could do to change his mind. Then, they wanted the steamy shots. George gave direction for Riot and Lexi to kiss, telling them to make it ‘almost R rated,’ but then gave direction about camera angle and tongue usage, making it all seem very unsexy.

  I couldn’t keep myself from being uncomfortable. I’d seen people kiss before, but it was something completely different to watch two people kiss like they wanted each other, kiss like there was no one watching, regardless of the cameras and the ban on visual tongue usage.

  The music played and they continued to paw and grope at each other, but when George yelled “Cut!” between takes, they pulled away and looked for direction, the two of them acting positively professional. I didn’t know if I’d be able to kiss someone like that, and then make suggestions about lighting and prop placement like Lexi was. Riot was ever-accommodating, tilting his head whichever way the lighting director needed, fixing his blocking to make the cameraman happy, also making sure Lexi was on board with all the touching he was going to be doing, asking her for permission to graze her breast with his hand.

  No, I could never be a Lexi or a Riot. I could, however, make sure that the wardrobe was on-point.

  Hours later and after many cups of coffee, George finally called the shoot a wrap. I sighed deeply, knowing that even though the filming was finished, my job was far from over. I watched as the extras moved to exit the soundstage and I instructed them to head to the wardrobe trailer to leave their costumes with me. One of the girls came up to me with a broken cuff bracelet and before I could tell her to leave it in the trailer for me, George approached us and she scampered away.