by Brie Paisley
This book is a work of fiction. Any names, places, character names, establishments, locations, or incidents are the work of the author’s imagination and is used fictitiously. If any resemblance of actual persons, dead or alive, places, locations, establishments, or events are coincidental.
Copyright © 2016 by Brie Paisley
All rights reserved. This book is not to be copied, shared, or produced in any way without the written consent of the author.
Cover art by Rebecca Marie of The Final Wrap
Edited by Karen Mandeville-Steer of Karen’s Book Haven Editing Services
Formatted by Brenda Wright from Formatting Done Wright
Photograph and photography by Christopher Correia of CJC Photography
Cover model BT Urruela
Cover model Jessie Reis
Other books by Brie Paisley:
Standalone:
Temptation
Series:
Worshipped-book one
Betrayed-book two
Coming soon:
Redeemed-book three of the Worshipped series
Okay, I’m going to get a little sappy for a moment. I have so many amazing people to thank, but I don’t want to forget anyone. Instead, I’m making this thank you for all of you. Firstly, I would not be here, doing what I love, if it were not for you, the reader. Thank you for taking a chance on me, a still fairly new author. Thank you for taking a chance on Carter, as this book is by far my favorite. I honestly don’t have enough words to express how grateful I am for you wanting to read my books, this one in particular. I hope you love it as much as I did while writing it, and thank you again from the bottom of my heart for reading.
Secondly, to the wonderful ladies in my fan group. Thank you for sticking by me when things weren’t going so well. Thank you for keeping me sane, and for all the laughs. Thank you for the naughty posts, as they were highly appreciated. You guys are absolutely amazing, and the love and support each, and every one of you show me, is awesome. Ladies, you keep me going and for that, I cannot thank you enough.
Thirdly, to my wonderful street team. We may be small, but size doesn’t matter. You babes rock it and pimp your hearts out. I cannot thank you enough for all the support, and pimping you do. I really do appreciate all the help in getting Carter out there, and making sure to enter in contests. You babes are the best.
To my beta team, thank you for reading and giving me the wonderful feedback. Y’all know how nervous I was about Carter, and hearing how much you loved it, gave me the courage and reassurance it would be great. Thank you for your honesty and wanting to help make Carter the best. To my review team, you ladies rock it. I’m so glad to have such an amazing group willing to read and review for me. It really means the world to me.
I can’t forget about my lovely ladies from Saints and Sinners Books. Thank you so much for going above and beyond to make Carter’s cover reveal and release day such a success. From all the hard work y’all did, down to tagging me in each post, I can’t thank you enough. You ladies are the best. To the amazing team with Give Me Books, thank you so much for helping me promote and get Carter to new readers. You have a wonderful team, and I cannot wait to work with you again.
Thank you to my amazingly talented cover designer. I’m really sorry it took us so long to come up with the perfect cover, BUT, it came out truly beautiful and stunning. As always, you rocked it. You have some serious skills, and I cannot wait to see what you come up with next.
A big thank you to Christopher Correia for capturing the perfect photo for the cover. You’re so talented, and I cannot express how thankful I am for everything you did to make sure I had the right picture. You’re amazing to work with, so kind and sweet, and I can’t wait to work with you again. To the models, BT Urruela and Jessie Reis, both of you are such an inspiration. I couldn’t have picked anyone else to fit the characters so perfectly. A huge thank you for both of you for inspiring Carter and Shelby. It was a pleasure working with both of you, and I can’t wait to plan more books with you.
To my brilliant and ever patient editor, thank you for helping me polish and make Carter the best it can be. As always, your suggestions were great. You’ve helped me with so much, and of course, helped me learn what to do and what not to do. It’s always a pleasure working with you.
I know I said I wouldn’t name anyone, but it’s needed with this thank you. Nikki, thank you so very much for supporting me and helping me so much when I needed it. You always cheer me on, giving me the courage to step out of my comfort zone, and I really have no way of thanking you enough. You’ve been there for me from the very beginning, and I’m so glad I have you on my team. Thank you again for everything you do, no matter how small it may seem.
Last but not least, thank you to my husband. Thank you for your support and telling me more than once how proud of me you are. The support and love you give me every single step of the way means more to me than you know. Thank you for understanding when I disappear for days, and the housework slips. You’ve always understood me, and I love you for that. Thank you, babe, for being everything I need.
Springsteen by Eric Church
Hotline Bing by Drake
Far From Home by Five Finger Death Punch
How Deep Is Your Love by Calvin Harris & Disciples
Gotta Be Somebody by Nickelback
Just A Kiss by Lady Antebellum
Lovesong by Adele
Tears Don’t Fall by Bullet for My Valentine
Moving On by Asking Alexandria
Let Her Cry by Hootie & The Blowfish
In Chains by Shaman’s Harvest
Wash It All Away by Fiver Finger Death Punch
I Found a Boy by Adele
I’ll Be Waiting by Adele
Habits (Stay High) by Tove Lo
I Want Out by Young Guns
Feel It In Your Heart by Cold
There for You by Flyleaf
I Apologize by Five Finger Death Punch
Words As Weapons by Seether
I Won’t Give In by Asking Alexandria
Missing by Flyleaf
Angel by The Weeknd
Stay by Flyleaf
Stay With Me by You Me At Six
Don’t You Remember by Adele
Walk Away by Five Finger Death Punch
Table of Contents
Prologue – Shelby
Chapter One – Shelby
Chapter Two – Carter
Chapter Three – Shelby
Chapter Four – Carter
Chapter Five –Shelby
Chapter Six – Carter
Chapter Seven – Shelby
Chapter Eight – Carter
Chapter Nine – Shelby
Chapter Ten – Carter
Chapter Eleven – Shelby
Chapter Twelve – Carter
Chapter Thirteen – Shelby
Chapter Fourteen – Carter
Chapter Fifteen – Shelby
Epilogue – Carter
This book is for Cody, my one. Thank you, babe for inspiring me to write Carter. Because without you, I wouldn’t have everything I needed to write this one.
I love you with all my heart, babe.
It seems like a lifetime, since Carter Harlow entered my life.
We lived in the same small town where you couldn’t go anywhere without seeing a familiar and friendly face. I was five years old, and he was six. I remember that day perfectly. We were at school, playing outside during recess. The school year was almost over, and it was a hot sunny day. The kids in my class played chase, or were in the sandbox making sandcastles. I was sitting on the swing, in my own little world. I didn’t know how to swing yet without
someone pushing me. My legs dangled, and I kicked the pebbled rocks with the tip of my shoes. I watched the other kids playing, seeing that they all had a playmate. It made me sad and envious that I didn’t have that. All I wanted was someone to push me on the swing. I didn’t have any friends back then, and maybe Carter knew what a lonely little girl I was.
Looking back, I didn’t understand why my Mom didn’t want anything to do with me, or why my Dad always smelled funny. But, Carter didn’t make fun of my dirty clothes or say anything about how I hadn’t bathed in a week. He walked right up to me, touched my hand holding tightly onto the chain of the swing, and looked right at me.
“I’m Carter. What’s your name?”
I squinted my eyes at him, wondering if he was about to comment on why I was alone. Most kids made fun of me because I didn’t have any friends. They would tease me relentlessly, but it seemed like Carter wasn’t like the other kids at school. “Shelby.”
He stared at me for a moment, then asked, “Can I push you?” I smiled brightly and nodded eagerly. All I wanted was a friend, someone to play with me. Carter took his hand off mine, and walked behind me. He grabbed a hold of the chains, and began to push me. I remembered laughing loudly, loving how high he pushed me. I also remembered holding on tightly to the chains and looking around the playground at the other kids. They didn’t pay us any mind, and I told Carter to push me higher and higher. He did as I asked, laughing right along with me. I finally had someone to play with, and I felt happy. For the first time in my life, I felt just like all the other kids. I felt normal. I remembered how in just a short amount of time, I felt accepted.
When the bell rang for us to go back inside, Carter slowed me down and helped me off the swing. He held my hand as we walked back into the building, and I started to dread the moment when he would drop my hand and head back to class. I didn’t want him to leave me. “Don’t worry, Shelby. I’ll see you after school.” He said once we stopped at my classroom. I grinned and nodded at his promise. That one simple promise meant the world to me, and even if I didn’t have any friends in my class, I knew I gained a new friend with Carter. When he met me right outside my classroom at the end of the day, I knew at the tender age of five, Carter would always keep his promises. Even though we’d just met we shared a bond, something special.
Thinking about it now, I was way too young to understand our connection. There was just something about that sweet, young boy. He quickly became my best friend, and there were hardly any moments when we weren’t together.
Now that I’m older, I still don’t understand the connection we had back then. Even when Carter and his family opened their arms and home to me when I needed them the most, I still didn’t understand why he wanted to be around me. No one else in my family cared anything about me, and it was inevitable for me to fall head over heels in love with him. It didn’t happen suddenly. It happened slowly over the years, time changed our relationship into something I couldn’t live without. There are so many things I still look back on, and I try to figure out why Carter and I were so drawn together. Why, after everything we went through, he could just … let me go? I thought what Carter and I shared was special, one of a kind. But everything changed once he left for college.
When Carter Harlow broke my heart, I did what I knew best.
I ran.
Pulling the hood of my jacket over my head as I exit the bus station, I glance around me, nervous I’m being followed. I have no idea if Easton knows I’ve left or not, and I didn’t stick around to find out. Shifting my heavy bag onto my other shoulder, I hope I didn’t manage to lose anything. It was hell getting out of Charleston, South Carolina, and knowing my friends were the cause for my abrupt departure still puts a sick feeling in my gut. Betrayed by everyone I thought were the ones looking out for me. What a crock of shit. I’ve come to realize in the past few weeks the only person I can trust is myself.
I watch a man pass by, and I still as he nears me. My heart drums in my chest, and panic starts to take over. Letting my breath out when the man walks past me without a second glance, I run my hand down my face, wishing I wasn’t so paranoid. I duck my head, as I make my way through the throng of people, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. If I could be invisible, I would be. Briskly walking out of the arrival zone, I think about how much farther I have to go, before I’m back home in Columbus, Mississippi. I’m exhausted and running on fumes more than anything. I continue to ignore the busy people around me, as I slip inside the bathroom outside the bus station to find a somewhat clean, empty stall. I shut the door behind me, only letting myself glance over the surroundings. It smells awful in here, as if someone puked for days and didn’t bother to clean it up. It’s dirty. It’s disgusting but for now, I’m safe.
I need to feel safe again.
I don’t dare set my bag down on the nasty floor. Instead, I unroll some toilet paper and cover the lid of the commode with layers of it. I sit Indian style, putting my bag in my lap. Taking a deep breath, I will myself to relax. I don’t know how I managed to get this far away from him, or how he hasn’t found me yet. I’m sure my mother would be more than happy to tell him exactly where I’m headed, and the thought makes a lump form in my throat.
Easton Carrington. My lying, cheating, asshole of an ex-husband.
I shiver, just thinking about his name. Divorcing Easton, then leaving when I had, was the best decision I’d ever made. Although I’m afraid he’ll come back for me, at least I’m free of him. Glancing down at my ring finger, I swallow hard seeing the faint tan line. I’d been married for seven years, and now, I’m … free. It’s surreal, a bit terrifying, but I’m determined to move forward. I can’t remember my time with Easton. Shaking my head, I clutch my half-moon and compass necklace, not wanting to think about him. Glancing down at it, I’m reminded of how much it means to me. Even after all these years, I’ve never lost it or taken it off. It’s a simple thing: a small compass surrounded by a half moon with the words, ‘no matter where’ on it. Holding it tightly in my hand, I close my eyes realizing I’m starting over. Granted my situation isn’t ideal, but at least I’m free of him. I push back the memories of how I got my keepsake, letting go of it. Opening my bag, I start rummaging through it until I find my bus ticket. I look at it, making sure all the information is correct. I’m in Atlanta, Georgia now, and in twelve hours I’ll be back in my hometown. I sigh, not really acknowledging how I feel about going home for the first time in thirteen years. It’s not something I’ve thought about in a very long time. I never thought I’d be going back to the place that holds so many good and bad memories. Or who I know I’ll see once I get there.
Carter Harlow.
Years apart, and that one boy, well man now, is still able to make my heart race when I think of him and our past together. I know I promised myself I’d never return home but, I have nowhere else to go. Seeing Carter again outweighs the risk of being in Charleston, and I’ll just have to deal with the repercussions later. I shake my head to keep the memories from overtaking me. I put my ticket safely back in my bag and pull out my wallet. I sigh, knowing my funds are low. The bus ticket wasn’t very expensive, but then again, I didn’t have much when I left South Carolina anyway. I only took enough so Easton wouldn’t notice. I don’t dwell on the fact that he made me resort to stealing, but then again, I only took what he owed me for all he’s done. I wanted to take it all, just to show him how it feels to be outsmarted and deceived, but I couldn’t do that no matter how much I wanted to. I’m a better person than I thought I was. Pulling out my money, I meticulously count each dollar and coin. Even digging to the bottom of my bag, making sure I don’t miss anything. I huff out loud, seeing I only have one hundred and sixteen dollars and forty-seven cents left. It’s going to be tight, but I have to make it on my low funds. I don’t have a choice at this point. I refuse to go back to South Carolina and to that life. I’ve been in worse situations before, mainly as a child, but at least back then, I had friends to help me w
hen I was in a bind. That makes me think of Annie and William Barrett. They practically raised me when my Mom wasn’t around. They impacted my life and took care of me, showing me what a real family is like, and how people can really love one another. Now, it’s just me. I’m alone again since the age of five, and I realize I don’t like it. I won’t give up though. I’ve come this far, and there’s no going back.
Placing my wallet back inside my bag, I quickly zip it, not wanting to see the scrapbook of my times from back home. It’s another keepsake, the one thing that I couldn’t leave behind, besides my necklace. I lean back against the toilet, thinking I can do this. I tell myself this is just a bump in the road. It’s just an obstacle in the way. This dirty bathroom isn’t the first disgusting place I’ve had to stay in for a few hours. It’s not the first time I had to hide in a public place because I didn’t have the money for a hotel room. I’m just happy this bathroom is warm, and I don’t have to look over my shoulder every minute of every day since my hell began. That’s what I compare my marriage to anyway. Don’t get me wrong. In the beginning, it was perfect, or as perfect as it could be. I don’t exactly know when things turned from great to shit. I don’t know why I didn’t see it coming, or I would’ve prepared better. I would’ve stood up to him and left sooner, rather than later. I wouldn’t have lost everything to Easton in the divorce. I wouldn’t have regretted marrying him. So many regrets and pain. It’s more than any thirty-two year old woman should have to endure.
Hearing the bathroom door open, I cringe and my entire body tenses. The heavy door creaks loudly, and I see a woman’s shoes from under my stall. The door beside my stall squeaks as it closes, and I barely breathe until she’s finished emptying her bladder. It seems like forever until she’s done, leaving as loudly as she came. I exhale slowly, telling myself I’m being paranoid again. There’s no way Easton knows I’m here. “Come on, Shelby. Get your fucking head straight.”
