My first instinct was to tear up the invitation but something stopped me. I could go to the reunion with my head held high, my boyfriend on my arm, and show them all that I wasn’t the same loser I once was. I wasn’t alone anymore. I had a boyfriend – even if it was Gideon. I phoned the number on the invitation before I could change my mind and purchased two tickets. Now all I had to do was tell Gideon about the reunion and somehow talk him into wearing a suit, or a clean shirt at the very least.
‘It’s not working out, is it?’ Gideon asked before our starter had arrived and before I had the chance to bring up the reunion.
‘What isn’t?’
‘You and me. Us.’
Oh, God. I was being dumped. By Gideon.
What about the reunion?
TWO
Billy
Billy and Theo had barely moved from their positions on the sofa since Ruth arrived home from work, the only difference being the pink T-shirt Theo had found drying on the bathroom radiator when he’d been forced to leave the room to pee. It belonged to Ruth so it buried his smaller frame, but at least it stopped his nips from freezing off his chest.
‘Shit! Quick!’
‘Balls!’
‘Fucking hell, Bill.’
‘Sor -’
‘Over there! Kill it this fucking time.’
Billy and Theo’s conversation was far from intellectual as their characters trundled along the screen, hiding behind barrels and abandoned buildings, waiting to pounce and shoot the hell out of the enemy.
‘Nice one, mate. Shit, move it. Move it.’
‘I am. Give me chance to -’
‘Fuck!’
‘Don’t worry. I’ve got it.’
Billy didn’t have it. Taking his eyes off the screen to check the time as he heard the front door opening and then slamming shut, his character was done for.
‘Ruth’s back early,’ he noted as Theo ranted about Billy’s untimely death. It had been less than an hour since Ruth left the house with a cheery ‘see you later, losers’ to meet Gideon, who didn’t even have the courtesy to pick her up. Not that he ever picked Ruth up for their dates. Or showed her any scrap of respect.
The sitting room door was flung open and Ruth stomped inside, kicking off her shoes and shrinking five inches.
‘Why aren’t you on your date with Giddy-up?’ Theo had started the game again but he could talk and hammer the buttons on the Playstation controller at the same time. And people say men can’t multitask. ‘Did he stand you up? Or has his flea-infested beard taken over his entire face and he can’t be seen in public anymore?’ Or had Ruth finally seen sense and dumped the wanker?
‘Leave it,’ Billy muttered. There was clearly something going on, something that was upsetting Ruth so much she couldn’t even bring herself to yell at Theo for wearing her T-shirt. ‘Why don’t you go and sort your washing out?’
Theo was about to protest. His washing could wait – his game couldn’t. But then he noticed Ruth’s eyes pool with tears and her lip started to wobble so he moved from the sitting room sharpish.
‘Is it the reunion?’ Billy and Ruth were alone now, Ruth perched on the edge of the sofa, her jacket still on. Billy wasn’t sure if she’d opened the letter. He’d told her about it but she’d taken the envelope upstairs and only emerged when it was time to leave for her date. Billy couldn’t wait to catch up with everyone from school – Dom, Smithy, Tuck. Maybe Stephen would even fly over from New York. He wouldn’t normally as it was too expensive to travel over for just a party, but he might this time, it being their last chance to see their old school before it was flattened.
But Billy knew it was different for Ruth. Her school days had been horrific and he couldn’t blame her for being upset at the prospect of seeing the bastards from her year again.
‘I’m not going.’ Ruth lifted her chin, decisive and determined, despite feeling like jelly inside. ‘I can’t go. Not without a boyfriend.’
‘But Gideon…’
‘… is not my boyfriend any more.’
Oh. That explained the moodiness. Billy would be pretty miffed if he’d been binned by someone as repellent as Gideon too.
‘What happened?’
Ruth pulled off her jacket and slung it on the back of the sofa before making herself more comfortable. ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’
Billy was relieved. He didn’t particularly want to talk about Gideon either. That he was no longer a part of Ruth’s life was enough for him.
‘Do you want to watch A Beginner’s Guide?’
‘But we’ve already seen it.’ A Beginner’s Guide To You was their favourite sitcom and they never missed an episode, watching it together every Thursday evening with some variety of giant confectionery.
‘When has that ever stopped us?’ Now on its third season, Billy and Ruth knew the first two seasons word for word. ‘And there’s a massive fruit and nut in the fridge.’
‘I’m not really in the mood. I’m having an early night.’
As Ruth heaved herself off the sofa, Billy realised how bad she must be feeling. Ruth never turned down an opportunity to watch A Beginner’s Guide, and she never ever rejected chocolate.
Billy had known Ruth from as far back as his memory could take him. They’d grown up on the same street and Billy was best friends with her older brother, Stephen. The Lynch’s household became his second home and he spent the majority of his teenage years there, either holed up in Stephen’s bedroom or sitting at the table eating Mrs Lynch’s home-cooked food, which was far superior to the ready meals his father provided him with.
After completing their A Levels, Billy and Stephen enrolled in the same university and moved into a house share in Woodgate, a ten-minute train ride away. 184 Oak Road was already occupied by Cosmo, a trainee chef with aspirations of opening his own restaurant one day. The three hit it off immediately and the house was constantly filled with fun, laughter, good food and beautiful women. The beautiful women flocked to the house because of Cosmo but Billy and Stephen got to eat amazing food night after night so they couldn’t grumble.
When Ruth turned up on the doorstep, her face pink and scrunched up with tears because she’d been dumped by some boy (Ruth had always been vague on the details), Billy and Stephen had offered to beat the boy in question up, and the idea was so ludicrous – Zack being sporty and well-built and Billy and Stephen being your typical computer geeks – it cheered Ruth up enough to smile and dry her eyes with her sleeve. She’d been crashing on the sofa for a few days when Ruth learned Cosmo was moving out in a week to live with his latest girlfriend. She begged, literally begged, Billy and Stephen to let her move into the third bedroom and because they couldn’t be bothered advertising for a new housemate, they agreed. Ruth applied for college in Woodgate and Cosmo helped her get a waitressing job at Café Katerina, the restaurant he was learning his trade in. The three lived together for a while until Stephen was offered a work experience position in New York and had shown such promise while over there that they offered him a twelve-month contract. Six years and several housemates later, Stephen was still in New York with his American wife and their three children.
Numerous occupants had taken Stephen’s bedroom over the years, the first being Sindi, who lasted two months, as it transpired 184 Oak Road wasn’t nearly glamorous enough for her. Ray lasted three years until he got married, moved to Wrexham and now just exchanged Christmas cards with Ruth and Billy. Leah lived with them for a year, but she never really gelled with her housemates and as soon as she was promoted at work she moved into her own flat. Christmas cards were never exchanged. Polly was next, living with them for eighteen months until she went on holiday to Cyprus and was never seen again. Jess was the shortest occupant, lasting a mere three weeks before she caught Billy ‘fondling’ her underwear, an accusation Billy hotly denies to this day. Louise was a classic tale: moved in, got together with Billy, broke up, moved out.
Billy and Theo worked together, and while
they were complete opposites in both looks and personalities, if you put them in front of a computer, they were as nerdy as each other, so when Louise moved out and Theo was looking for a new place it was the obvious solution for Theo to take the third bedroom. Theo had been living with Ruth and Billy for almost two years now, mainly because they had no idea how to get rid of him.
To: s.lynch
From: billy.worth
Subject: Reunion baby!
Hi mate,
How’s everything in NY? Have you heard about the reunion? Highmoor is getting ripped down so they’re having a massive reunion in August. Will you be able to make it? I’m looking forward to it, but obviously Ruth isn’t so much.
Speaking of Ruth – great news. She isn’t with the prick Gideon any more. She’s upset about it (not good) but she’s better off without him. He’s a tosser and Ruth deserves better.
Let me know about the reunion, yeah?
To: billy.worth
From: s.lynch
Subject: Re: Reunion baby!
Yep, heard about the reunion. Someone from the committee emailed me yesterday. Think I’m going to be able to make it. We were planning a trip during the summer anyway so works out well.
Give Ruth a big hug from me. I only met Gideon once, when I was home last Christmas. You’re right – he is a tosser. Spoke to Ruth like shit and was so rude to Mum. Was going to say something, but Mum said not to, that I’d only make matters worse.
Look after Ruth for me, will you?
To: s.lynch
From: billy.worth
Subject: Re: Re: Reunion baby!
You know I’ll look after her. She’s like a little sister to me.
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A Beginner’s Guide To Christmas
Jennifer Joyce
© Jennifer Joyce 2013
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
First published in 2013
Cover design: Jennifer Joyce
Cover images: Jennifer Joyce & Vector Stock
Find out more about the author at www.jenniferjoycewrites.co.uk
A Beginner's Guide To Christmas: A festive romantic comedy short story Page 5
