I giggle as I hear him chasing me down. An arm snags me around my waist and I’m hoisted in the air.
“You can run, but you can’t outrun me.” He throws me over his shoulder and swats my ass. Next thing I know, I’m back in bed.
“Ben, I need to go downstairs.”
“And you will. Right after I fuck that smile off your face and have you screaming my name.”
Thirty minutes later, I run out of the room with wet hair pulled back in a ponytail, wearing a t-shirt, shorts, and flip flops. I don’t know if I want to laugh or kill him.
Nick and the sales and banquet managers are waiting for me.
“So sorry. I slept like a log last night. So you have papers for me?” I can feel Nick’s eyes on me, but I refuse to look his way.
“Yes. Here are the final bills for everything.”
“Thank you. Give me a minute to look these over.”
“No problem.”
It doesn’t take long for me to see everything is in line as it should be. I sign my name on all the pages where designated and take my copies.
“Thank you so much. It’s been a pleasure doing business with you, Miss Calhoun.”
I stand and shake hands with the sales manager. “Will I ever convince you to call me Samantha?”
“Maybe the next time we work together.”
“I hope so,” I say as I watch her walk away. This is the part I’m dreading.
“So, you and Rhoades, huh?” Nick says with a hint of a sneer.
“Uh, yeah. Didn’t we already have this conversation?”
“Yeah, I guess so. I hope it works out.”
I don’t like the way he says that, but I let it drop.
He gives me a curt nod and I watch him stride to the hotel doors.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m leaving. I’ve already had breakfast and checked out, like most of the others.” The meaning behind his snide comment isn’t lost on me.
“Fine. I’ll see you at work on Monday.”
Ben is dressed when I get to the room. He can tell something is wrong. So I tell him.
“Let it go. He’s jealous.”
“But why?”
“Samantha, look in the mirror, sweetheart. You’re a prize and he wants you.” His words are gentle and kind, yet they don’t comfort me.
“I honestly feel he thinks he’s looking out for me.”
“Maybe. But I’m going to look out for you much better.”
I finish packing and we leave. He walks me to my waiting car and kisses me before I get in. It seems lonely without Ben. I roll down the window and he asks, “Tonight?”
“Early?”
“Five?” he asks, laughing.
“My place or yours?”
“Mine.” With the way my heart starts to flutter, it makes me wonder if I can hold out that long.
My ringtone screams at me, waking me from a dead sleep. I bump my head against Sam’s, waking her up in the process. We didn’t get much sleep after our night together, which seems to be a thing with us. I can’t get enough of her and she me.
“Sorry, babe.”
Simply silencing that damn thing wouldn’t be satisfying enough as I ponder the merits of throwing it against the wall to make it stop. I’m about turn it off when I see my sister’s picture flash on the screen. She doesn’t call me before the sun is up for no reason. Immediately, I’m awake.
“Jenna?”
“Oh my gosh, Ben.”
Rising up on one arm with my heart beating like rapid gun fire, I ask, “What is it? Are Mom and Dad okay?”
My heart stops beating for one minute and it’s Drew all over again, waiting for the news that he was gone.
“They’re fine.”
I exhale all my worry and replace it with no-morning-coffee level annoyance. “What the hell, Jenna?”
“Ben, aren’t you supposed to be at work already? It is Monday morning.”
“It’s …” I check the time. “Six.”
“Yeah.”
Shit, what else could she be calling about? “So, what? Did you talk to Dad and he wanted you to check up on me?”
I wouldn’t put it past him. There’s no law that says I have to be at work at the crack of dawn. And this morning, I have a reason not to be.
“No, I’m calling because Mom and Dad’s thirty-fifth anniversary is this weekend and I completely forgot.”
“You, who schedules everything? Trying to decide between the stiff shirt Senator, dad’s choice,” I cough into my fist, “and the tattooed auto mechanic, who you really want, must be keeping you up at night.”
“Haha, very funny. Seriously, I dropped the ball and I don’t have to explain to you why because you forgot too. Besides, we need to plan something big.”
I run a hand through my hair. “And you’re telling me, why? You usually handle this. Just tell me how much money I need to give you.”
“Of course you would dump this all on me.”
“Don’t you normally take care of it?” I tug at my hair, ready to pull it out. Sam’s smaller hand plucks my fingers loose.
“Yeah, but still. I’m busy, too, you know.”
“Fine. I’ll make dinner reservations or something. What else do you do for a thirty-fifth anniversary?”
“Is that your sister?” Sam asks.
“Is that Sam?” Jenna asks.
They speak at almost the same time. I nod and Sam frees my hand of the phone.
“Jenna?”
And I’m on the outside looking in. I decide to use the time to mold my hand over Sam’s chest. I move in and flick a tongue over her nipple.
“Yes,” Sam says squirming. Her voice betrays what I’m doing to her. “No, I’m okay.”
I head lower.
“Don’t worry. I can help you.” As I insert myself in between her thighs and kiss my way to that spot, she says. “Ooo. No. Um … look it’s no trouble at allllll.”
She forces me to pull back with a fistful of my hair. I give her a toothy grin.
“Twenty guests is a cake in the park. I mean a walk in the park.”
She frees me from her bond and I get back to work.
“I do this all the time. I have connections. I’ll work something outttt.”
Fucking her with my tongue is one of my all-time favorite things.
“No, your brother isn’t doing anything. He went to grab something to eat.”
I can’t help chuckle at that, especially since I’m actually feasting on my favorite thing.
“I’ll call you later. I’ll get your phone number from Ben.”
There’s a pause and I’m not sure if I’ve caused it or if my sister is talking her ear off. I get my answer when she stutters her next word.
“Ggiifftt.”
She’s close. I’m determined to make her scream while she’s on the phone.
“Maybe a trip?”
I stop, unable to hear Jenna’s response and say, “Dad will never go for that. He’ll say he’s too busy.”
Sam’s face morphs into annoyance. Seems like someone didn’t like that I stopped. She grabs my hair and pushes me back down where she wants me.
“True, your dad probably needs a rest. We’ll talk.”
She ends the call, but I go back to work and get her to the moon and back before we finally leave separately for work.
Although, my day started off pretty fucking awesome, by noon, I’m sure I have scowl lines chiseled into my face. The bearish market is making my life miserable. Everyone is scrambling, trying to mitigate the effects of the down swing today for our penny-watchful clients.
Unfortunately for Lisa, she’s getting double the dose of my displeasure.
“Who in the office would have called Karen Spencer?” I ask.
Karen had wanted me to help her get her finances in order for the future, and I’d set her portfolio up, but since we were fucking, I’d passed the torch to Jeff to handle her money so there wouldn’t be a conflict of inter
est.
“No one that I know of, Mr. Rhoades.”
My eyes narrow with her use of my surname.
“Is this because I wouldn’t sleep with you?” I stage whisper.
She starts to resemble a blackbird with her beady little eyes. “Even though I think you could do better, I have more integrity and respect for this company and my job to do something like that.”
I don’t know if she’s talking about Karen or Sam and don’t care to. I don’t want to be pissed off if she thinks Sam isn’t good enough for me.
“So no one called any of the clients that missed the meeting?”
Her face turns smug. “You should talk to your girlfriend. I personally gave her the list of contacts for the Sorry We Missed you letter that went out to all the clients that didn’t attend the event.”
I chew on that, not believing Sam would’ve called Karen. It doesn’t make sense, unless she doesn’t trust me. That thought rolls off me, as I don’t believe for one minute she would call Karen.
My day is made worse when I get called into Dad’s office.
“Close the door, Ben, and frost the glass.”
It’s unusual for him to request this. But I do as I am told.
Dad stands older but very much looking like the imposing man he was when I was a kid. I suddenly start to rethink my day and what I might have done wrong. He holds out his hand towards the small sofa and chair he has in his office. I sit on the sofa knowing Dad likes the high backed chair.
His chest rises and falls with aching slowness. “I got the statements from accounting and the bottom line is we didn’t make budget and we haven’t the last couple of quarters. I had high hopes you would do your part and bring in more high net worth clients from your days at JP Morgan Chase. Unless the real reason you left was due to performance.”
Caught by surprise, I think my jaw hangs there As the jab hits its mark. It doesn’t take a leap to see I haven’t lived up to his expectations.
“Despite that, we aren’t out of business. However our fee income continues to decline after the real estate bust a few years ago. The economy may have recovered, but not enough.”
Guilt weighs on me knowing I haven’t brought in the business I should have.
“So why did we just spend all that money on the employee event? We could have saved that.”
Dad sits forward, resting his arms on his knees while he clasps his hands. “This is a lesson you need to learn.”
“What’s that?” I ask, knowing better but feeling petulant.
“People and perception. If we appear weak, we will be eaten by the sharks. Not to mention all the employees who could jump ship. It’s an event we have every year and something the employees remember fondly. That’s the case Samantha brought up when talking over the budget in our follow up call.”
She’s impressed my father. Good for her.
“So what’s the plan?” I ask, the heavy burden of his words hanging in the air.
“Quarterly bonuses will be smaller and there will be grumbles about that. We need new business if we are to make the budget this quarter. I don’t want people like Mark and Jeff looking for new jobs.”
I leave his office after telling him not to give me a bonus. He’d planned to suggest it had I not done so on my own as he’d decided he wouldn’t take one either. It wouldn’t totally make up the difference in the reduction, but it would make the sting less for some. I work late coming up with proposals for the list of contacts I kept when I left the city.
When I get home in the middle of the night I miss Sam like I’ve never missed a woman in my bed until now. Selfishly, I text her.
Me: Dinner, tonight? I’ll cook.
I don’t expect an answer thinking she’ll see it in the morning. But my phone dings.
Sam: Love to. What time?
Me: Anytime. My place.
Sam: Now
Me: I wish. Tomorrow? Eight?
Sam: Eight it is.
I lay back getting ready to sleep with a picture of her in my head and my dick in my hand.
Monday at work is insane. Nick acts like an ass towards me. I guess he’s still pissed at me for staying in Ben’s room. What makes me even angrier is that Martin himself deemed the Rhoades Investment Team function a resounding success. Nick should be happy about that, but when I let him know the great news, all he does is pout.
“It’s time to clear the air, Nick. Get whatever it is that’s bothering you off your chest.”
His scowl speaks louder than his tone. “Okay, fine. This thing you have going with Ben Rhoades … he’s a douche and you shouldn’t be involved with him.”
Whoa! What the hell is his problem about all of this? I can’t believe he won’t let this go.
“While I appreciate your concern, like we’ve already discussed, my personal life doesn’t affect you. The topic of Ben Rhoades is closed for discussion.”
Nick narrows his eyes until they are practically slits. “You’re not serious, are you?”
“Very. Our event was a huge hit with his company so let’s move on. We have other business that needs our attention.”
“Look, I’m sorry. It’s just my sister had a boyfriend that turned out to be worse than bad news. He started out with the dick moves like your Ben, you know, pulling the same kind of crap he is. I took the do not interfere route and did nothing. Eventually, things started to get worse and she made excuses for him and told me he wasn’t the asshole like I thought he was. Then when things got so bad and she ended up in the ER, she figured out I was right about him. I don’t want that for you. All I’m saying is if Rhoades were a good guy, he wouldn’t be an asshole to you. I’m only trying to protect you, Sam.”
It sort of makes sense, where he’s coming from. But then again, he’s also taking a huge leap and assuming that Ben’s a jerk when in actuality he knows very little about him.
“That must’ve been terrible for you and I’m sorry you had to see your sister suffer like that. But projecting all that onto Ben isn’t right, Nick. He’s not that guy.”
He shakes his head, throws his hands up in the air, and stomps out. The rest of the day is stressful with Nick’s resentful attitude. Maybe I shouldn’t have been that hard, but no. The more I think about it, the more I know I’m right. My personal life is not his business, and I need to keep the lines between the two very distinct.
When I get home from the office, Lauren is gone. She’s left a note saying she’s staying at the beach. I’m not surprised. It’s only twenty minutes away and the weather is gorgeous. I get ready to head over to Ben’s and pack an overnight bag because I have no intentions of coming home tonight. I also stop at my favorite ice cream shop and pick up a few flavors, some sprinkles, and whipped cream for dessert … or maybe even to play with later. When I pull up, I grab my stuff and walk to his door. There’s a sticky note telling me to come on in.
Music plays, and I can hear pots clanging in the distance. When I enter the kitchen, Ben is busy chopping something. There are worry lines on his face, but I don’t ask yet.
“Hmm, busy man, I see.”
“Hey. Sorry I didn’t greet you. I have chicken going and I was afraid my hands would be a mess to answer the door.”
“So considerate.”
“Yeah.” A smile grows on his handsome face. “That came from Drew. He had me on the hand-washing brigade, I swear,” he says absently. Then as if he’s just realized what he’s said, he stops what he’s doing and stands there in silence.
I set my package on the counter and put my hand on his arm. “You know what I think?” I don’t wait for him to answer. “I think you’re one brave man to be this strong. Because if I lost Lauren, my bestie since high school, I wouldn’t be functioning. The fact that you’re a successful businessman and have helped Cate this long, despite your own feelings, tells me a whole lot about the man that Ben Rhoades is.”
Steel gray eyes meet mine and he holds up his hands. “There are so many things I would do right now
if I could, Sam. Only I have fucking chicken juices all over my hands.”
And we both start laughing. Which happens to be perfect. I lean in and kiss him and with an arched brow he says, “Risking dirty hands?”
I grab the bag to put the ice cream in the freezer when he stops me with his curiosity. “You’ll find out after dinner,” I tell him.
That evening Ben opens up to me with stories about Drew and their friendship, how close they were, and talks about his illness all the way to the bitter end. “I really thought he was gonna beat it. I think we were all so sure of it that when it finally came back the last time, we still didn’t think he would die. Only he knew. He fucking knew. He was a doctor, you know. An oncologist, of all things. So he goddamn knew he wasn’t going to make it. And all of us poor suckers had to sit by and watch the greatest man that ever lived die right before our very eyes. And through it all, you know I never thought it would happen. I fucking lied to myself and him every single day, saying he would find a way. Because he was Drew McKnight.”
By the time he finishes telling me everything, his hands are fisted. The urge to hold him is overwhelming, but I don’t want to overstep my bounds.
“It’s okay to grieve.”
“Is it? I feel like I should be able to move on!” His frustration is clear as glass.
He stands and I follow him into the living room. When he sits, he draws me onto his lap.
“There is no time limit on grief, Ben. No one says you only have a year, or a month, or whatever. I imagine losing him was like losing a part of yourself. You can’t just sweep it away like crumbs on the floor. You have to learn to live without him. And that takes adjusting. Brushing off your hands and moving on isn’t the answer. It doesn’t work that way. And if someone told you that, they were lying. When my grandmother died, it took my mother a couple of years to get to the point where she could talk about her and not cry.”
He drops his head back on the sofa and I think maybe it’s my cue to get off his lap, but I’m wrong.
“Don’t go. I need you here.”
“Okay. I’m not going anywhere,” I say.
“Maybe Cate is right by leaving. Drew is everywhere in this town. I don’t want to forget him, but it fucking hurts to remember he’s gone. And I’m sorry if I keep dumping on you. It’s just until you, no one has understood except Cate, and I’m supposed to be strong for her. So I keep some things to myself.”
A Mess of a Man Page 19
