Desperate: I'll Do Anything for Love

by B. M. Hardin

  Elroy was raised by a single mother and she’d done an amazing job teaching him how to be a man. He cooked for me. He cleaned. He rubbed my feet and washed my hair. Every date we’d ever been on, he paid. He opened doors and pulled out chairs. He washed my car and mowed the lawn without me having to ask. And on top of everything else he was fine and had good sex. He was just a damn good man. But he wasn’t perfect. But neither was I. Not even a little bit.

  But still, I was always watching him. I was always looking, just by nature. My profession and my past taught me to pay attention to everything, every single detail, so there wasn’t too much that would get past me. It wasn’t too much that a person could hide that I wouldn’t find. Unless they were really good at it like me.

  I was what I liked to call crazilicious. That was my made up word to describe myself which meant that I was a whole lot of good things; beautiful, smart and successful. But all of that was mixed with a whole lot of crazy. At least I could admit it. I knew that my deck of cards wasn’t stacked quite right, but I kept my crazy ways out of plain sight and under control. But I was a force to be reckoned with when I was pissed off, overlooked, hurt, or taken advantage of and that was a side of me that Elroy didn’t want to see. I wasn’t a mental case or anything. But I was spiteful, vindictive, and revengeful to say the least. I’d been hurt and walked all over so many times, that I breathed for a chance to get even. Hey, don’t blame me. Blame the people that had hurt me.

  “I was asleep and my phone was on the charger Serenity. That’s why I wasn’t answering. You have a key. You should have just come in to wait for me or you could have just come back to see what I was doing for yourself.”

  I’d thought about it, but I’d wanted to see what his excuse for not answering and not being there was going to be. And so far, I wasn’t buying it. All I knew was that for at least two hours or so, he wasn’t home and he wasn’t answering his phone either. Finally, I got tired of riding by his house and just went back home and called him over and over again until I fell asleep.

  “In case you didn’t know this already, you are the only woman that I want baby. You are the only woman that I need. Serenity you are the only woman that I love. And I’m about to prove it to you,” Elroy said dropping to his knees.

  I gasped as Elroy pulled out a ring.

  Finally he was about to pop the big question!

  I almost couldn’t believe that it was finally happening for me! I’d waited so long for this day to come. I mean after three long years, I didn’t know what the hell he had been waiting on anyway! But finally Elroy was stepping up to the plate and about to ask me to be his wife. And I was the luckiest woman in the world!

  “I was out getting your ring from Terry’s house if you must know. I hid it there because you’re so damn nosey. There. That’s where I was. Now…”

  “Yes! Yes! Yes! I’ll marry you!” I screamed and Elroy started to laugh.

  “Damn can I ask you the question first? Serenity Thomas, will you marry…”

  “Yes! Yes! Yes! Now put that ring on my finger boy!”

  I felt like I’d just won the lottery or something as Elroy twisted the ring on my finger. He loves me! He really, really loves me! The proof was in the pudding, and the two-carat rock on my finger, proved that he thought that I was worth it! He thought that I was something special! He thought that I was forever!

  Eyeing the ring, I wondered when he’d gotten it. He must have been saving up for this! But it was beautiful and it was all the reassurance that I needed. He was everything that I’d ever wanted in a man and he wanted to marry me! I was getting married!

  I squealed and jumped into his arms once he was on his feet. “I love you. I love you. I love you!” I screamed, kissed his face a million times and then pulled away from him. “I have to go call everybody! All of my family and especially Dion because you know he thought that you were never going to do it! He thought that you were never going to make me your wife. Oh, I just can’t wait to show him the ring! I’m going to be like BAM! In your face boo! I told him that you loved me. I told him that you were going to make an honest woman out of me. I told him. I told him!” I said excitedly and flirtatiously, all at the same time.

  “No. No. Wait. Don’t tell nobody yet.”

  I looked at Elroy confused.

  “Why Elroy?”

  “Well, I put a ring on it, but we probably won’t be getting married anytime soon. Probably not for another year or two,” he said.

  “And why is that Elroy?” I didn’t like where this conversation was going, and I hated to be put in situations where I had to show my true colors. For the most part, Elroy got to see my nice, professional, sweet side; the side that I preferred to be. But he’d had a few small run-ins with the side of me that just didn’t give a damn, and even then I’d tried to be limited with my words and my actions.

  “I’m really not in a situation for a wife yet. I just got hired on for the permanent position at my job remember and I have some things that I want to do and set up first before officially making you my wife. Save back up some money. I know, you make some big bucks, but I’m the man and my job is to always take care of you.”

  Another thing that I loved about him, but so what, I was ready to get married…now!

  “Then why propose Elroy?”

  “Hell why not? I ain’t going nowhere and neither are you. And hell, marriage is all that you talk about so,”

  “So you gave me the ring to shut me up?”

  “I gave you the ring because I want to marry you. I just said that it won’t be anytime soon,” Elroy came closer to me. “Now let’s celebrate our engagement shall we?"

  I pushed his face away from mine, but he grabbed my hand. “Please don’t tell me that you’re about to act like this? Come on Serenity. We just got engaged,” he said and puckered up his lips.

  “What’s the point in getting engaged if I can’t tell anyone Elroy? What am I supposed to say when they ask me about the ring?”

  “I don’t know. Tell them that it’s a promise ring.”

  “What am I? Twelve?”

  “Tell them that you found it. Or stole it.”

  “From who? Your mama?”

  Elroy chuckled. I knew that he was joking but I didn’t see a damn thing funny!

  “Well, only wear it in the house then.”

  Did he really just say that?

  “You know what? Here, just take your ring back,” I said in frustration and attempted to take the ring off but he stopped me.

  “Fine, you can tell people. Now can we get down to celebrating or what?” Elroy said slyly.

  I allowed him to kiss on me for a while. I waited until he was all hot and bothered, and once his penis started to swell, I pulled away.

  “Nope. I’m going to go call my Mama!” I screamed, running away from him, with him cursing behind me.

  ~***~

  “I got something you can lick,” I teased Elroy.

  “Yeah, that’s why I got a rash around my mouth now! From licking on that “something” that you got between your legs,” he joked.

  “Whatever. You know you love all of this.”

  “I sure do baby. So, is work better today?”

  “Nope. I’m ready to go already.”

  “Well, you’ve wanted that position for a long time Serenity. And now you got it. What is it the office lead or leader over all the rest of them or something?”

  “Something like that. I’m right under my father now.”

  “Well, yeah, so there’s no point in complaining now. It’s a blessing that she quit and you were able to get it. You were already swamped with work, but now with you being only a step under your father, I can only imagine the amount of work you are about to have and the stress. If you can’t do it, tell him to hire someone else,” Elroy said.

  Of course he didn't know that I’d threatened Sarah to quit so that I could take her place. I’d gotten the job, but a part of me wanted to find her and give it back. I gues
s you really do have to be careful what you wish for. Because you just might get it and absolutely hate it!

  “You’re right. No more complaining. So, since we’re engaged now, do you really think that it’s necessary to have two houses? We haven’t really needed two houses anyway for a while now. My house is bigger, you sleep over most of the time anyway, but if you want me to move to yours, I will,” I said to Elroy on the phone.

  Both of our houses were paid for, but one of them would need to be rented out or something since we were now engaged and getting married…one day.

  “I’ll probably move to yours,” he said.

  “When?”

  “I’ll let you know,” was all that he said before saying that he loved me and then he hung up. I checked the time. It was time for me to get back to work too, so I didn’t bother calling him back to ask him more questions about his response. Instead, I headed out of the break room and walked towards my office.

  “Serenity, I just laid some cases on your desk,” my father said, who was also my boss.

  I worked for Thomas & Co. Law Firm, and boy did I have some big shoes to fill! It was my father’s company and Daddy, Roger Thomas, was the man! Definitely the best lawyer in town. He was well-known for his cases and his work, all around and he was respected in our community, state, and all over the world. Some folks even traveled to have my father represent them. He was just that darn good. Some of his cases had been televised and everything and nine times out of ten, he always won.

  Since I’d followed in his footsteps, I couldn’t let him down. We’d come from much of nothing, but I’d watched my father work, go to school and take care of his family, just so we could have a decent life. By the time that he was done with law school, he and my mother were already on baby number six, and they still didn’t stop, but he’d stuck it out and now he was more successful than even I thought that he would be.

  So, years and years later, once I was done with school, just like he’d said that he would, he’d had a job waiting for me. I’d only been a lawyer for about three years now, but I was pulling my own weight and he seemed to be more than proud of me. I looked up to him, and admired him more than any man on the planet so I refused to let him down; which was why I’d wanted Sarah’s position. She used to get a lot of the bigger cases, with a lot more media attention, like the ones that my father usually snagged. The ones that actually meant something to a lawyer’s career and I wanted a piece of the pie! The Big Nate case was lucky to have fallen into my lap, but I was glad that it had because the victory, though I’d gotten a little dirty, the victory was enough to assure my father that I was good enough to take over Sarah’s position and someday take over his company.

  I was sure that he was going to pass down the company to me in a few years, whenever he was ready to retire so now, I was just hoping to get the other part of my life on a roll. Marriage, kids and all of that good stuff.

  Going to school had consumed most of my early twenties and I hadn't had a chance to really live or even think about settling down. After my college heartbreak, that turned deadly, I’d decided that I only needed a man for one thing. Sex. For a long time, I didn’t want any parts of anything that looked like, or felt like love. I was friendly, dated a little and was definitely sexually active, but anything too serious, scared the crap out of me. I’d never wanted to feel the way that Rodney had made me feel again. At that time, I wanted love so bad, more than anything in the world and I was willing to do anything to get it and keep it. I was desperate for love. And desperation is not a good feeling. It could make you do the unthinkable and I never wanted to feel the way again.

  So for years, I did anything I could to keep me from getting too attached to any man. If I started falling for him, I found a way to mess things up between us. If I started getting too attached to the sex, I cut him off and sexed myself.

  It wasn’t until I was settling into my new career that I felt like it was time. I felt like I was ready. I felt like it was time to give real love another try. So, I started to look for more. And that’s when I found Elroy.

  Well, that’s when Elroy found me.

  He’d come to see my father on a legal issue regarding an incident that had taken place at his old job. Needless to say, my father took on the case, and won. Elroy received a nice settlement, but three years later, he didn’t have anything to show for it but a nice car, a house and a few pieces of jewelry that he refuses to sell or pawn. So here recently, maybe about six months ago, he had to go back to work.

  Anyway, the day that they won the case, after chatting with my father, he tapped lightly on my office door.

  “Hey pretty girl,” he’d said.

  “I’m not a girl. I’m a woman.”

  “I can see that. You’re all woman baby with your sexy self.” Since my weight loss, I’d heard that a lot more than I was used to, but back then I didn’t know just how good at talking Elroy was until he’d managed to get me to agree to go on a date with him.

  “Is there something I can help you with?” I’d asked him that day. I’ll admit that at first glance he might make you a little moist in between the thighs. He was light bright, almond colored man with beautiful eyes, a gorgeous smile, with all of his teeth, and so much more. Nice low haircut and well-kept facial hair. And that body, the muscles, the tattoos…my goodness! I could go on for days, but his looks, then, only told me one thing.

  Danger!

  I loved an attractive man, but just to look at him. I would take a good, faithful, ugly man over a fine ass one any day. But still yet, I fell for Elroy.

  “Can you help me, you say? Absolutely. I’ve been searching for an angel, all of my life, and I think that I’ve just found her. Now, I may not seem like the kind of man who believes in love at first sight and maybe I don’t. But I am a man that believes that you’ll never know if your soul mate is standing right in front of you, unless you agree to go on a first date with him. And from just one simple date, maybe, and I’m going out on a limb here, but maybe you’ll realize that the person that you’ve been looking for all of your life is the person sitting next to you. And maybe you will realize that dreams really do come true. I can tell you this right not that you’ve been a part of my dreams for years; from the way you look, to that sexy ass black dress that you’re wearing. So, I’m asking you, my dream, to come true and have dinner with me. Have a drink with me. Share a laugh with me. Make a memory with me, and maybe start a future with me,” Elroy had said.

  Whoo! When I tell you that man could talk you right on out of your panties, I am not lying, nor am I exaggerating. To this day, my mouth will be saying no, and as he’s talking, my hands and my body will be saying yes and before I know it, I’ll be butt naked, giving him something that he and I both could feel.

  But from that day, that moment, three years ago, Elroy and I have been in each other’s lives and there wasn’t one thing that I could complain about when it came to him and the way that he treated me. He had never done me wrong. Even the smaller things that I didn’t like just weren’t worth complaining about when I looked at all of the good things that I was getting from him on a regular basis.

  Oh, I just loved me some Elroy!

  Finally, I made it to my office and just as I started to work, a delivery guy tapped on the door. I looked at him and the flowers that he was holding. I smelled them as I signed and I smiled once I read the card from Elroy.

  “To My Future Wife Desiree, Love Elroy.”

  Desiree? Who in the hell is Desiree?

  The name caused me to have a minor flashback.

  I knew a Desiree back in high school and I couldn’t stand her! She was so mean to me, just plain ole’ horrible! That girl was evil and I’d always said that she had the devil in her. She used to call me names, pull my hair, and that wasn’t even the half of it. But I got her back though. I remembered overhearing her say that she was allergic to aspirins. One day, I’d taken two from home and when she wasn’t looking, I dropped them into her drink.


  I remembered watching her drink it and just waiting. Waiting to see what would happen. After a while, she’d started choking and acting as though she couldn’t breathe, and guess who helped her? Me. It wasn’t like I was trying to kill her or anything. I just wanted to see her suffer just because daily she made me suffer by teasing me and embarrassing me in front of our peers.

  But after that day, after I helped her, she never teased me again. For what little time she remained at the school before moving away because her father was in the Army, she treated me with nothing but respect. She didn’t hang out with me or anything, but she completely stopped picking on me and even sometimes she would pass me and smile.

  I took a deep breath and tried not to get upset and jump to any conclusions. It was probably a mistake. I called Elroy’s phone over and over again. Of course he was at work and wasn’t answering, but I couldn’t wait until later. I needed to know now! So finally I called his job.

  “Yes, this is an emergency call for Elroy Ross. This is his wife.” I waited for a few minutes, and finally he came to the phone.

  “Hello?”

  “Who in the hell is Desiree, Elroy?”

  “What? How do you know about Desiree? And they said that it was an emergency.”

  “It is and if you want to keep your job, I suggest you tell me who Desiree is, or I’ll come down there and you can tell me in person. And you don’t want me to come down there Elroy!”

  See, a little of that other side of me slipped out again, but at the moment, I didn’t really care. I mean, my father had taken us out of the hood and placed us in the suburbs, but I knew and remembered exactly where we’d come from. And on top of that, I was part Latino, so sassiness ran through my veins. So, translation: Elroy could get these hands if need be!