by Jade Kerrion
Damn it, she thought. Didn’t he know that he already had?
Dinner was served out on the patio. Grilled vegetables surrounded the filet mignons, served medium-rare. The mashed potatoes had a dash of salt and rosemary, and Shannon tried not to think too hard about the generous dollops of melted butter she had, following Brandon’s instructions, swirled into the potatoes. Brandon and Drew enjoyed a bottle of Chianti while Shannon sipped from her Riesling. Maggie drank water, insisting that wine made her fat and she had a half pound to lose.
The lively dinner conversation focused around, “Do you remember when…” and Shannon was treated to recounts of Brandon and Drew’s exploits through high school.
“No, no, I swear. That never happened.” Brandon chuckled. “It was Lisa Jones and Mary-Ann Williams. There wasn’t a third.”
Shannon rolled her eyes. “So you’re admitting that you took two girls to senior prom.”
“Yes, two. Not three. Hey, it was just bad timing. I asked Lisa, and she took so long to get back to me that by the time she did, I’d asked Mary-Ann, who had accepted.”
“So why didn’t you tell Lisa that?”
“Seriously? She was the hottest chick in school. I wasn’t about to say no to anything as far as she was concerned.” Brandon glanced at Drew. “Didn’t you attend the prom with Lisa’s youngest sister?”
Drew nodded. “Candice.”
Maggie’s face lit up. “I remember Candice. Not my year, but I saw her around school. She was sweet. Is she still living in Westchester?”
“Most of the folks we grew up with are still living within one or two hours of New York City,” Brandon said. “It’s hard to fall too far from the tree.”
“I did,” Shannon said. “I grew up in San Diego.”
“You’re a long way from home,” Maggie said. “Did you go to medical school in the area?”
Shannon shook her head. “No, I went to UCLA for medical school, and then moved out here to work at the hospital.”
“Why?”
“I had something to prove, I guess. My family has lived in San Diego for generations, and our little suburb feels like an extension of the Larson clan, albeit with different names, fortunately, thanks to marriages.”
Brandon chuckled. “No inbreeding, thank God.”
Shannon nudged him in the ribs. “Anyway, I suppose I could have found a job easily enough at the hospital that has an entire wing named after my grandfather, but I wanted to know if I was really succeeding because of me or because my name happened to be Larson.”
Brandon shrugged. “Why would you be afraid to leverage a natural asset?”
“Because it was an accident of birth?”
Brandon gestured to his sister. “That was an accident of birth, but she worked hard to be a model and designer instead of just a pretty face.”
Maggie struck a flirtatious pose before collapsing into giggles. “You say such nice things about me, Brandon. Don’t wear yourself out.”
“I’ll try not to. Anyway—”
Shannon’s phone rang, and she dug it out of her pocket. She glanced at the number and an icy chill immediately struck her chest. “Hello?”
The buzz of conversation around the table immediately fell silent, and Tom Lancaster’s voice came through clearly. “I just got off the phone with Daniel Lewis.”
“I thought lawyers didn’t work on weekends?”
“Apparently, this one does. I have some numbers from him.”
“Okay.” She shot Brandon a quick glance, and to her surprise, he reached his hand across the table to hold her free hand, as if anchoring and strengthening her.
“They’re looking for two million dollars.”
“What?” Shannon’s jaw dropped. “That’s ridiculous.”
“It is ridiculous, but we’re just starting the negotiations. It’ll drop quite a bit, I gather.”
“How much will it drop?”
“By fifty percent at least.”
Panic stole her breath. “A million is still too much. I don’t carry that much malpractice insurance. I’ll have to sell the clinic to pay it off.”
“Look, it’s too early to get fixated on a number. I’ll keep plugging away at bringing the settlement down.”
“I thought we weren’t going to settle. You said we had a good case.”
“You do, but cases can go any way once they’re in front of a judge.”
She shot to her feet. The motion yanked her hand out from under Brandon’s. Shannon paced the length of the living room. “Are you suggesting that we pay him off? Because that’s what a settlement is.”
“It’s a trade-off. You’d get your life back and you’d get to move on with your clinic. It could be months before the case goes to a judge, and with the appeals back and forth, it could take years. You need to weigh all that—”
“But the clinic didn’t do anything wrong! I didn’t do anything wrong; I wasn’t even there! How can they do this?” Her voice cracked. “How can they force me to sell my clinic?”
“No one is forcing you to sell anything. Look, the negotiations are just starting. We’ll get through this.”
“How? Tom, tell me how, because I can’t see it. I can’t see the light at the end of this tunnel.”
“I’ll get you there,” he promised quietly.
She hung up, her vision blurring from tears. She caught the glimpse of motion in the dining room as Brandon rose and walked over to her. His strong arms wrapped around her, bracing her against the heaving shudders. The crushing pain in her chest was so intense that, if she did not know better, she would have thought she were having a heart attack.
No, not a heart attack. It was worse.
She was going to lose her clinic.
Shannon became aware of Brandon’s hand gently stroking her hair. She pulled away from his chest to look up at his face, which was etched with regret. Her heart felt so full she had to force the words out. “I…can’t talk to you about it, can I?”
Brandon shook his head.
The silent motion broke her heart. “It’s the most important thing to me.”
“I know.”
“I have to talk about it.”
“I know, but…” He grimaced.
“Not to you.” Shannon pulled away from him completely. “How can this work?” she asked, her voice cracking. “When I’m staring bankruptcy in the face, when my life is falling apart on me, how I can be with you, knowing that you’re on the other side?”
“I’m not on the—”
“Your firm is representing the people suing me! How many ways can you spin this?”
“It’s not about the spin. I’m not on the case, Shannon.”
“Then why can’t you talk to me about it?” Her hands clenched into fists. “You can’t, because you are invested in it.”
“I can’t because any knowledge could jeopardize the case either way.”
“Either way? This isn’t a goddamned seesaw. This is my life. I need you to be on my side, Brandon. I need someone who’s going to be on my side the whole time, and not just when his firm says it’s okay.”
“You don’t get it. What I know could hurt you.”
Shannon tilted her head, glaring at him. “What? Were you going to run back to your bosses and tell on me in order to get your promotion?”
“No, but things could come out in passing conversations. I try to be careful, but it’s safer if I don’t know—”
“There aren’t any ‘buts’ about this. I don’t even really care who you’re rooting for to come out on top in this case.” The lie quivered on her tongue but she pushed on. “You’re good at making a life with you seem wonderful, Brandon, but I need someone I can talk to about everything.” Her heart ached, but how could it? Hadn’t it already shattered? Her voice breaking, she whispered, “You’re not that person.”
She turned, grabbed her handbag off the couch, and walked out of the house. She did not turn around when she heard Brandon’s footsteps behind her.
“Let me take you home,” he said. “You’re in no condition to drive.”
Shannon shrugged off the hand he placed on her shoulder. “I’m fine. I want to get home so I can call someone I can actually talk to.”
“I’m sorry.”
“So am I.” She drew a deep, shuddering breath. “I didn’t even want your professional advice, Brandon. I just wanted you to hold me while I talked, and you can’t even do that.”
He made no move to stop her when she unlocked her car door and stepped in. She put the gear in reverse and the engine squealed as she backed out of the driveway. For a moment, her car idled as she glanced in his direction.
He stood in the driveway, framed by darkness. His hands were shoved into the pockets of his denim jeans, and the shuttered expression on his face confirmed he was as closed off emotionally as he was mentally.
She had been right from the start. It could never work out between her and Brandon.
She just hadn’t expected it to hurt as much as it did to be finally proved right.
Chapter 13
“So what are you going to do?”
In her office with only Andrea for company, Shannon had no need to pretend to be stronger or smarter than she felt. The clinic had closed for the day, but Shannon stared at the sandwich she had scarcely touched for lunch, and which did not look any more appetizing at dinner. She released her breath, her shoulders slumping on a sigh. She pushed aside her sandwich and looked up at Andrea. “I don’t know. It seems like, either way, I lose. If I settle, the payout could bankrupt me and force me to sell the clinic. If I try to take this to court, I might win or I might lose, and it would take months, if not years.” Her voice tightened as her hand clenched around her coffee tumbler. “There is no scenario in which I come out on top.”
“And Brandon. What did he say?”
“What could he say? He couldn’t even listen to me. I understand that he doesn’t want to risk overhearing something that he might spill in a passing conversation with Daniel Lewis, but I needed to talk. I needed him to listen, and he couldn’t even do that.”
“I’m so sorry, Shannon.”
“You know…for a moment, that night, hanging out with Brandon and his family, I thought I found the man I wanted to be with for the rest of my life, and then my lawyer called me and yanked me back into reality.” Shannon’s smile was a bittersweet twist on her lips. “You know what the greatest irony is? Realizing you’ve fallen in love at the exact same moment when you realize he’s not the one for you. There’s no more pointed way to realize you’ve been a fool.”
“It’s not foolish to love a good man.”
“Even if nothing can come of it?”
Andrea shrugged. “Are you better off for having known him?”
Shannon nodded. That answer, at least, was easy.
“Someday, when all this is over, when you’re no longer on opposite sides, could you have a future together?”
“How can we?” Shannon asked, her voice a stricken whisper. “I’ll always know that he wasn’t there for me when I needed him most. How can a relationship survive that kind of lack?”
“It can’t, but only if you define your relationships by what you lack. What about what you gain? What about what you give?”
Shannon froze. Shock dashed over her, and she had to squeeze her eyes shut against the guilt. “I’ve only been thinking of me.”
Andrea’s smile was affectionate. “Some days, on the rough days, it’s okay to focus on what you lack, and you’ve had a bunch of really rough days, but they won’t last forever.”
“And in the end, life balances out.”
“Yes, it does,” Andrea said. “When you worked at the hospital ER, you knew it was a short-term play. You had always known you wanted something different. When you bought into this clinic, you knew it was a medium-term play, a lifestyle that could give you the freedom to balance work and family the way you wanted.”
“And Brandon—he could be the long-term play,” Shannon mused.
“Could he?”
“Yeah, he could.” Shannon sighed. She leaned forward and buried her face in her hands as her thoughts spun. I could just lose my business, or I could lose my business and the guy. One problem—the fate of her business—was somewhat beyond her control. The other—Brandon—was not.
She could still walk away from the impending disaster of her life as a winner—both she and Brandon.
Straightening, she reached for her phone and called her lawyer. “Tom, I’m interested in wrapping up this business as quickly as possible, preferably without losing everything. I need you to figure out my options—time, cost, everything.”
“All right. Can I ask, what inspired this? When we spoke on the weekend, you seemed adamant on fighting it out in the courts, if necessary.”
“I’m rethinking what’s really important, and what’s worth fighting for. I might have been focused on the wrong thing—well, not the wrong thing...just not the most important thing.”
Tom was silent for a moment. “Does this have anything to do with that lawyer from Lewis and Hammerstein—Brandon Smith?”
Shannon’s heart clenched. “Perhaps.”
“Guess that explains what I’ve heard through the grapevine.”
“What have you heard?”
“Trouble in the Lewis and Hammerstein paradise. Apparently, Daniel and Brandon have been at odds recently. Daniel’s a partner, of course, but Brandon’s enough of a hotshot to pull a fair number of clients with him if he leaves.”
“Leaves? Why would he do that? He’s about to make partner.”
“I don’t know. He doesn’t pump you for information, does he?”
“No. He won’t talk about the case at all. He doesn’t even want to hear me talk about it.”
Tom grunted. “That’s the right thing to do, in any case, as cold and unsympathetic as it makes him seem. Anyway, I just spoke to Daniel this morning and told him you weren’t too interesting in a quick settlement. I think I’ll let him sweat it out a bit before telling him you’ve changed your mind.”
“But why?”
“I don’t think his client wants to go to court. He may be more willing to negotiate a lower settlement to keep this case out of the hands of a judge. I’ll keep you informed.” Tom hung up.
Oh, damn. Shannon thought. What a mess…
The setting sun cast its golden light into Brandon’s office windows and pooled upon the soft cream carpet. He was buried in one of his latest cases, but looked up at the sharp, impatient knock on the door. Brandon’s eyes narrowed. “Daniel. What do you want?”
“The clinic. The Larson woman has decided to go all the way to court.”
“You mean Shannon Larson. Not ‘the Larson woman.’”
“You put her up to this, didn’t you?”
“Be careful with your accusations, Daniel. I don’t discuss the firm’s cases with anyone outside the firm.”
“Not even with the woman you’re shacking up with?”
Brandon leaned back in his seat, but the tautness in his shoulders belied his easy pose. “It’s none of your business.”
“We have to win this case. It’ll open the door for all kinds of legal work with our new client.”
“By all means, win it.”
“We can’t afford to go to court; you know that. The evidence is too weak, and I haven’t found anything to strengthen it. The judge will toss out the case.”
Brandon shrugged. “So?”
“You have to talk to the Larson woman. Get her to settle.”
“Shannon. Or Miss Larson. Not ‘the Larson woman.’”
“Damn it, Brandon. This isn’t the time for semantics.”
“This isn’t semantics. It’s courtesy. And if indeed I’m shacking up with Shannon, then what you’re asking me to do is a violation of professional ethics.”
“How is ‘giving free legal advice’ a violation of ethics?”
“When it’s unsolicited and the parties are in a
n emotional and sexual relationship.”
“So you are shacking up with her?”
“It’s not relevant. We don’t speak about the case at all.”
“It doesn’t mean you can’t.”
Brandon frowned. “What part of ‘violation of professional ethics’ do you not understand?” He pushed slowly to his feet. “Let me make this clear, then. I will not discuss this case with Shannon, and I will certainly not convince her to do something that’s not in her best interest. If you want her to settle, you talk her lawyer into it.”
“This could mean millions in future revenue for Lewis and Hammerstein. It could mean your partnership.”
Brandon’s smile was cold. “I wondered when you’d get around to it. I want the partnership, but not badly enough to screw Shannon over, and certainly not badly enough to do something I don’t want to see printed on the front page of the New York Times.”
Daniel snorted. “You haven’t told Hammerstein, have you?”
“If he cared to ask, I would.”
“You’ve already lost one big client for the firm. I don’t think you can afford to not help me land this fish.”
“We’ve already talked about this.” Brandon frowned. Was Daniel dense or just persistent? “You don’t have any leverage over me.”
“How about the fact that I know you’re telling the truth about one thing? I know that you and Shannon are not shacking up. In fact, I know she ended things with you.” Daniel slouched against the door, elegant in his Hugo Boss suit. “That’s the part I don’t get. You’re risking your partnership, your entire career for a woman who dumped you.” He shook his head. “You need to figure out what’s important. You have to prioritize the long-term view.”
Resentment lodged like a fist in Brandon’s chest. “I am.”
Daniel smiled thinly. “I’m sure you’ll do the right thing. I’ll be in my office.”
Brandon’s hands closed to fists. Damn you. Daniel was right. Shannon had made her choice, and it was not him. He could not blame her. He had not been able to meet the most basic tenet of a relationship—to listen.
