by Maggie Way
The cycle was certainly vicious.
Life promised to only get more complicated as today was the last day of school for the summer, and he would find out if he had a job next year. The students loved him. If placement were determined by that alone, he’d be head cheese. But that was too easy, and he was staring down having no position at all.
Bill tossed an arm over his eyes, blocking out the sun, hoping to ignore that it was time to get up and face the world.
His cell phone buzzed on the table next to his bed.
A text from Anne, Mother wants you to come for breakfast.
Darcy. Bill was sure he’d told Lady Catherine that Bill had been brought up to speed. He rolled to his side and winced when he tried to push up with his broken arm. He did the best he could with his grooming, which wasn’t half bad as it was his non-dominant arm that broke. Forgoing a shave in order to gain time, he drove to Lottie’s café for a coffee. He knew they needed to talk, and he thought it best if they scheduled that instead of hoping for an opportunity. That was a surefire way to procrastinate what needed to be said.
When he arrived at the café, he was surprised to find Lottie’s father behind the counter.
“Morning Mr. Lucas,” he called. “Where’s Lottie this morning?”
“Gone.” He handed Bill a large coffee cup.
It was certainly a perk when the owners of his favorite café knew him so well he didn’t have to order.
“Gone? Took the day off?” He filled it with a strong bold brew called Nectar of the Gods and felt a little risqué.
“Nope, went into the city for some business.”
Realization dawned for Bill. “Ah, so she’ll be back later. I’ll come by then.” He sipped his coffee.
“Nah, Bill. She quit the café. Won’t be back in. Said if we want to carry her baked goods, we’ll have to buy them from her. Wholesale, of course.” He chuckled. “Raised a smart one with her, I did. Now it’s Maria’s turn to learn the business.” He stepped away to help another customer.
Lottie quit? Was she in city to seal the deal with Thorpe? The thought of her working with him, much less being alone with him, made Bill want to club someone with his cast. Particularly the Twerpedo. Was she going to live in the city? Coming home only on holiday or funerals? He tried to imagine every day without her in it? He’d still come to the café and if Meryton Matchmakers didn’t close, he could work there. Maybe he’d become a marriage counselor and hang a shingle. But none of that felt normal without Lottie being present. It felt…lonely.
Before he could quiz Mr. Lucas further, his phone vibrated again.
Text from Anne: She’s starting to worry.
Knowing there was nothing he could do at the moment, and that Lottie hadn’t packed her worldly-goods and moved on yet, he banked his panic, and just like that—he had a moment of clarity and a plan. Sighing with relief, he waved goodbye to Mr. Lucas and then drove to Rosings Park. Lady Catherine met him at the door. Something she’d never done before.
“William.” Her voice broke. “I am terribly sorry. It’s awful. Just awful and I’ve—”
“Lady Catherine, please.” He pulled her into a hug. “This could have happened to anyone, anywhere.”
“I feel so responsible and ashamed,” she whispered the last part.
“You have nothing to be ashamed of. But he does.”
She held him tight, her forehead on his shoulder. He wondered if he would have been close with his mother. If he could have gone to her and spilled his heart’s secrets. He said, “I’m not sure I want to have my own church.”
Lady Catherine stepped away and studied him.
“Are you saying…did you feel…have you decided…?” She stopped, appeared to gather her wits before she continued, “What is it you want, William?”
“I’m not sure, but I do know it’s not a church.” He wasn’t ready to share about his stand-up. Her guilt might be deep, but he’d bet it wasn’t that deep. She’d invested a lot of time and energy into him and his chosen profession. Yes, he’d chosen it. If he told her he was going to chuck it all for a life on the road, baring the scars of his youth for some laughs, she’d have a coronary.
Her lips thinned as she stood back, studying him. “I will do my best to support the decisions that you make, William. I’d love to see you lead people; you’ve a natural ability at it. Always have had it. But if that doesn’t make you happy…well, just don’t run off to the Netherlands, dye your hair blonde, and stop talking to me.”
He smiled. “I could never.”
They shared a moment that, for Bill, was what family was all about. Acceptance, even in the toughest of times. Why he’d feared sharing his concerns with her, he didn’t know. It was Lady Catherine, after all, who bailed him out of juvie and pushed him toward a better path. And it was Lottie who had been there every time. Even when he’d been one of the kids who’d vandalized part of her parents’ and the grocer’s storefronts with spray-paint.
“Come have breakfast. Darcy’s man has a report for us about that snake of an accountant.” She led him to a bright breakfast room. Darcy, Henry, Chaz, his sister, and Anne were all at the table. Darcy had a newspaper blocking his face.
“So, are we all good now?” Anne asked. She was wearing short sleeves and her arms, though still scarred, were not as red and welted as they had been.
“What have we here?” Bill asked, pointing to her bracelets.
“Oh, I got those in Africa. And the skin is compliments of Lizzy Bennet. I’m not sure what her sister puts in that cream, but it’s done something.”
Bill smiled and nodded.
“Of course, I won’t go out like this, but it’s too hot for long sleeves. So, there you have it.” She buttered a scone.
“Where’d you get these?” Bill slid into an empty seat and pointed to the pastries.
“We have Lottie Lucas make up some and deliver them daily. They’re excellent. I’m wondering if the coconut oil she uses has something to do with this.” Anne held up her arms before taking a large bite.
“Here’s a dumb question. When’s the last time you had allergy testing? Maybe it’s not eczema but food, or maybe it’s the good living here.”
“Or perhaps it’s boredom. Your rash has expired from boredom and moved on to another exciting host,” said Caroline Bingley. “I’m leaving as soon as I can. Darcy, are you coming with? You must be going out of your mind here?”
“I’m sorry you are unhappy here, Caroline.” Darcy folded the paper then passed it to Lady Catherine who opened it with a crack. He sat back in his seat, his coffee in hand. “I think I like it here. It’s quiet, and we all know how I enjoy that.”
“But the company. There’s no society, nor is there a good place to get a nice dinner. No, I’m headed back to the city.” She sighed as if these matters had worn on her greatly.
“I think I’ll stay a while longer,” said Chaz with a Cheshire grin.
“Chaz has a crush,” sang Anne.
“She’s very nice, Chaz, this Jane, but her family is awful.” Caroline shook her head. “Did you not see the way the mother attacked Darcy? And that article she wrote about him. I can’t support that.”
“Well, I’m not interested in dating her mother.” He stuck his spoon into a grapefruit.
“But they are part and parcel, are they not?” Darcy asked.
Bill felt the need to defend the Bennets, but he lacked anything favorable to say about Mrs. Bennet.
“You won’t find a purer heart than Jane’s.” It was a lame defense, and he knew it. Of course everyone could tell how sweet Jane was. “She’s quite savvy at what she does as well.” He wanted to stuff his foot further into his mouth so he’d shut up. The way Caroline glowered at him, he knew it had been the wrong thing to say.
“I won’t disagree that Jane Bennet is a lovely person. I have enjoyed getting to know her. They say her sister, Eliza Bennet is quite the catch, yet, I’ve found her to be very unbecoming. Overly confident and,
dare I say it, a know-it-all.”
Bill cleared his throat.
“Remember Caroline that Bill works with the sisters—” Chaz said.
“They’re my distant cousins, even,” Bill added.
“And Darcy and his aunt are in business with them. Try not to insult everyone in one sentence please,” Chaz said.
“Are you insulted Darcy?” She faced him.
“I’m not in business with them, nor would I be. Too emotional. But I’m not insulted. No. And I don’t believe Lady Catherine is either.”
“How do you find Miss Eliza Bennet?” Caroline asked. “If you agree with me, then I can be smug to Chaz all day.”
“I’m afraid I can’t agree completely, Caroline. I like a strong woman, and Elizabeth Bennet has that in spades. What you call a know-it-all, I call sure-footed. I admire that.” He set down his coffee cup.
“And she’s quite pretty,“ Chaz added.
Darcy stood. “Well, there is that too.” He smiled. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll go get that report and share the information.”
Standing outside Elizabeth’s house, Lottie leaned against the low stone wall that surrounded Lizzy’s small front yard and watched lights flick on then off, as the sisters moved into or out of a room. Laughter occasionally floated out of a window. She felt her first pangs of…fear? She didn’t regret anything she’d committed to today. Only that with all the changes that were coming, some of it would be bittersweet. Like moving out of the house.
In that moment, it occurred to her that she’d never lived alone. She went from her parents’ house with all her siblings, to sharing a three-person dorm room at college, and from there to Lizzy’s house. But once she closed on the Gardners’ place she would be all alone in that rambling building. Lottie chewed her thumbnail. The sooner she decided if she wanted to turn the apartments into one large place for herself, the faster she could get the renovations done. If she kept them as apartments, then she wouldn’t be alone. Not that she was afraid of that. Nope. She moved on to chew her index fingernail. It was that it was new. Everyone was apprehensive about new. She hoped.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Bill asked from behind her.
Lottie screamed and leaped toward the front door. “Are you crazy? Sneaking up on me like that?”
“I thought you heard me coming. I called your name.” He straddled the stone wall.
“You did not.” She kept her eyes averted. She didn’t want to know if he liked his new haircut or ask if his arm hurt. She didn’t want to know anything more about him. She needed to make it a clean break, and the time to get used to having no Bill in her life was right now!
“Are you calling me a liar?” He chuckled. “Where were you today? I stopped by the café, and your dad told me you quit. What’s going on?”
The words wanted to spill from her. She was excited and scared, and he had an incredible knack for soothing any fears and being just as excited. There was so much about today she wanted to share with him. She’d had the pretend conversations in her head. From making the offer and having it accepted on the Gardner place, to her intense haggle with John Thorpe.
But she said nothing.
Asking about his arm was the only thing she could do. It was casual enough. “How’s it going?” She touched the cast.
“Lotts, come on. What’s going on? I’ll tell you my story if you tell me yours. Lots has happened to me today. Here, I’ll give you a teaser—I lost my job at the seminary. I mean, I’m not being picked up next term.”
Lottie gasped. She had a million questions. “I’m sorry. I know that’s a disappointment.”
He leaned forward and peered at her, studying her face. “What’s going on here?”
The sound of her swallowing the large lump in her throat was so loud the crickets paused their cadence. “We’ve been friends a long time, Bill. But I think now we have to go our separate ways.” She put a hand up to stop his protest. “I love you,” she said with an unapologetic shrug. “The real-deal love. Not because I’ve known you for so long, but because I’ve known you for so long and you just get better as you get older. Does that make sense?” She began to babble. “I mean, those teen years were rough. You were a heathen, and sometimes you made it difficult for people to love you, but I never stopped.”
“Lottie—”
“You don’t get it? I have been waiting for you to come around, to catch up with me for years, and it’s taking too long. When we kissed? I thought, finally! Now it was going to go somewhere, but you fought it. You fought me. And that hurts. And that’s when I realized being around you now is starting to hurt.” She wiped away the tears that coursed down her face.
“I never want to hurt you.” He crossed over the fence and stood beside her. He took her hand in his. “If you give me a chance—”
“I can’t. I can’t even be around you. I’m starting to get angry with you, and soon I’ll resent you. I just want us to go our separate ways on a high note. Preserve what we can.” Gently, she slipped her hand away.
“Please don’t leave, Lotts. I need you here.” He reached for her again, but she stepped toward the door, away from him.
“You need me outside? In the yard? Because you’re ruining my grand departure. I was going to close the door quietly in your face.” She crossed her arms. “Can’t you give me that?”
He furrowed his brows. “I mean, don’t leave Meryton. I don’t know where you’re planning on going, but it can’t compare to here.”
Lottie stepped toward him. “Wait, you think I’m moving away? You think I’m so wrecked about you that I would leave the town I love? Right out of college I had a job offer in the city making insane money, and I turned it down to come back here.” Granted, part of that was related to him but he didn’t need to know that. “You have some ego. Now? Now, I’m going in to slam the door in your face.”
He sprinted around her, blocking her way. “Wait, your dad said you quit and were in the city taking that offer. I just assumed—”
“Well, you assumed incorrectly. Move, Bill.” She waited for him to get out of her way, but he didn’t. “Oh never mind.” She turned on her heel, intending to go in through the back door, but he caught her arm and turned her toward him. Then he dropped to one knee.
“Charlotte Lucas. I am a horse’s ass. I’ve spent a large part of my life believing I didn’t deserve anyone, and when I tried to picture sharing my life with someone, I never could figure out how to work them in around you.” He chuckled, but Lottie didn’t. “Sorry.” He cleared his throat before continuing. “I don’t have a lot to offer you. I lost the job at the seminary school, but I’m okay with that. I don’t want to work for them anyway, with their antiquated ideas that have nothing to do with teaching and even less to do with compassion and tolerance. When those old geezers move on, then I’ll go back. But also, I lost a large chunk of money that would have been a nice cushion for the little Missus and me. Darcy thinks we can get a portion back, but it doesn’t matter. None of it matters if I don’t have you.” He caressed her palm with his thumb.
“I also informed Lady C that I didn’t want a church, so you can see I’m not really a prize. But I’ll figure something out. It doesn’t worry me. What does worry me is losing you. What sent a sharp pain to my chest was you saying I can’t be a part of your life anymore. That I cause you pain. And if that’s true, if that’s what you really want, I’ll go away.” He pulled a small black box from his pocket. He let go of her hand to open the cover. Inside was a large simple solitaire diamond. “I love you, Charlotte Lucas. I love that sometimes when you can’t find floss you use your hair, which is kinda gross when said out loud like that, but I love it anyway. I love how you fold up tight and tuck yourself in the corner of my couch when we watch movies. When you worry, you chew your fingernails. I really love that you work with chocolate and aren’t afraid to find unique and exciting uses for it.”
Lottie’s hands shook. Small tremors pulsed through her, causing her kn
ees to lightly collide with each other. So many emotions filled her that she couldn’t sort but one out. Blissful happiness. Uncertainty followed quickly behind it. Was he on his knees because he loved her or because she was a crutch?
“I don’t know what to say,” she whispered.
“Well, let me officially ask. Will you marry me, Lotts? I can’t promise it will be easy, but I can promise you’ll laugh. And if we go hungry, we can sell your ring.” He stood and held the ring closer. “All it took was one moment where I’d thought you were gone. One moment I felt not part of your life, and it scared me. I tried to imagine you happy with another, and it made me angry. Nothing compares to what we have, and when I thought that was gone—” He shook his head. “I’ve never experienced it before, and I hope I never will again. So now what do you say?”
“I say yes.” She leapt into his arms, wanting him more than the ring.
Behind her, in the house, she heard the sisters clapping and hooting.
“About time,” someone said.
Chapter Twenty
Charlotte Lucas and William Collins were married a week later in an intimate and private ceremony at Rosings Park. By intimate, no more than thirty people were in attendance. Which to Elizabeth was rather large. But as one can surmise, when Lady Catherine was involved, events tended to grow. Hence the quick date. Had they decided to wait, Lottie knew she’d have a full church wedding with a major gala for a reception. This outdoor shindig suited Lottie perfectly. Bill as well, for that matter. She wore a simple white gauzy dress and Bill a lightweight tan suit, and they laughed throughout the vow exchange, holding hands and grinning like loons.
Elizabeth had asked for Lottie’s permission to rub the nuptials in Darcy’s face, but Lottie had squashed it.
“But it would do me good,” Elizabeth had protested.
“Leave him alone. He’s a good man.”
Elizabeth snorted.
“He is. Quiet, really.”
Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “Why are we talking about Darcy? Look at you. You’re positively glowing. I’m very happy for you, Lottie.” They hugged tightly. “I will miss you in the house.”
