by Abigail Owen
“Thanks,” Sarai said as she gathered up her jacket and knives. She strapped them on as she started to walk back toward the buildings.
“Wait…she has knives? Okay definitely the sexiest thing ever,” she heard Charlie comment from behind her. Still Zac said nothing. Weren’t most male shifters known for a jealous temperament? She was tempted to throw one of those knives in his direction. Just to shake him up a bit. But that would be walking the fine line between irritated and crazy, so she resisted the urge.
CHAPTER 32
“Sarai.” She heard him call her name just as she opened the door to their shared suite of rooms.
It was juvenile, but she ignored him and went inside, closing the door behind her with a soft click.
She crossed the common living area toward her bedroom, pulling off her knife sheathes as she moved. A shower was definitely in order. At the sound of her door opening, she whipped around.
“What’s going on with you?” Zac demanded.
“Me? How about you?”
He stopped on the other side of the red couch in her sitting room and gave her a confused look, thick brows drawn down over his eyes. “What do you mean?”
Sarai pursed her lips as she eyed him closely. He seemed sincerely baffled by her behavior. Maybe twenty years of avoiding any relationships beyond very fleeting friendships had stunted her emotional growth as a woman.
Brutal honesty, then. “When we left New York, you pulled back.”
He shook his head. “No. You did.”
“I did no—” Sarai cut herself off. Obviously, they’d each misread the other.
Zac seemed to come to the same conclusion. He took a step closer. “Do you still want me?” he asked with his typical bluntness.
“Yes.”
His shoulders dropped infinitesimally just before he moved around the couch and closed the remaining distance between them. He took her face in his hands and proceeded to kiss her in a way a starving man might eat his first meal.
Pulling back, he gave her a tender smile, which she returned. “I guess you still want me too,” she teased. “Because I’m sweaty and stinky right now, and you’re still here.”
“You could say that.”
“Then claim me.”
Zac tilted his head, studying her face. Something in her voice had alerted him. She saw when realization struck. “You mean make my claim public?”
She tilted her chin up, holding onto her pride while trying not to beg, yes please. “Only if you want to.”
“Do you want to?”
She nodded.
“Hell, yes,” he breathed before kissing her, hard.
Without removing his lips from hers, he walked her backward toward the bedroom.
She managed to pull away just long enough to weakly protest. “Seriously, I’m all sweaty.”
Without a word or even a pause, he changed direction. Sarai, lost to the passion of his kiss, didn’t bother to wonder where he was guiding them. She opened her eyes when her butt hit the countertop in the bathroom. Zac lifted her up, to sit her on it and then wedged in tight between her legs. His hands roamed her body, trailing from her back to her tiny waist, over her hips, down her thighs, and back up. She didn’t stay passive for long. Her hands inched up under his t-shirt to explore every ridge, every hard muscle of his torso and arms. All the while, his lips never left hers other than for small needed breaks to breathe.
Picking her up, he walked them into the large shower, where he turned the water on full blast, plastering their clothes to their skin. Then he pinned her against the wall with his body and proceeded to peel off her wet sports bra and shorts.
“Remember that whole going slow thing?” he muttered against your lips.
All she could do was nod. “Uh-huh,” she panted.
“Maybe later.”
Sarai grinned. Zac was so in charge, so self-contained all the time. She loved that she could make him lose it like this with such ease.
She pulled his head down to hers. “Make love to me,” she whispered. Then she gave herself up to his kisses. Completely.
****
Zac lay in bed beside Sarai. He traced the contours of her back in slow strokes, pushing the navy-colored sheets lower, relishing the softness of her skin.
“You know,” he murmured conversationally. “I’ve never seen you shift.”
Instead of answering, she pulled the sheets back and stood, unashamed of her body. Without a sound or warning, faster than a blink, she stood before him in her cougar form. She was on the smaller side, very pale for a cougar, her coat similar to her blond hair. Rather than golden eyes, which were more common among her kind, she had unusual blue eyes rimmed in gold. She paced back and forth for a second, feline grace evident in every line and movement of her body. Then, just as suddenly, the woman reappeared before him.
She slipped back between the sheets into his arms. She grinned. “Well?”
He brushed her hair back from her forehead. “Incredible.”
She stared back at him with sparkling blue eyes.
“Why don’t you shift more often?”
She raised an eyebrow. “There hasn’t been much opportunity lately. I’m also not very powerful in cat form. At the Carstairs Dare, shifting was dangerous. I’m too much of an Omega—weak, vulnerable.” She shrugged again. “I learned to not bother.”
“Well, I think you’re beautiful. I’d love to run with you some time in our shifter forms.”
She smiled. “That would be nice.”
“And I’d like a date.”
“Kind of feels like we skipped that step, didn’t we?” She shook her head.
He was glad she seemed more amused than upset by it. “Even so. A date would be nice.”
She tipped her head at him. “We’ll, there’s a small movie theater here or a bowling alley. I’ve heard there’s even a private restaurant. One of the older cats was a chef before coming here and set it up. Surprise me.”
She snuggled into his chest, but he suspected there was a smile on her face. His body reacted to her naked skin against his, making him think about what they’d just done together.
He frowned a little. “I didn’t hurt you, did I? When we made love?”
She gave him a sleepy shake of her head, and he breathed a little sigh of relief.
“I’ve never lost control like that with anyone but you.”
She smiled. “Sounds like a compliment.”
“Damn frustrating is what it is. You deserve to be loved gently, tenderly.”
She glanced up and he caught the wicked gleam in her eyes. Sarai rolled to her side, letting the sheet slip down. “Sounds kind of boring.”
Arousal ripped through Zac’s body. He thought so too, but he was a man of honor. He would treat his woman right. His woman. He still couldn’t quite believe she’d asked him to claim her publically. To shifters like cougars, who weren’t naturally monogamous, a public acknowledgement of a relationship was a big deal. Now, here she was, turning into a little wildcat in bed.
He shook his head incredulous. “I thought you were this shy, demure little thing.”
She shrugged a slim shoulder. “I’m guarded, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m shy. And it definitely doesn’t mean I hold back from the people I let close to me.”
She scooted across the bed, pushing him to his back as she did, then lay her full length on top of him. “I’d say, I’m letting you pretty close.”
Heaven help him, he wanted her again already, and the damn minx could tell, as evidenced by how she wriggled her body in such a way as to arouse him further.
Zac groaned.
Then she leaned forward and took his earlobe between her teeth. Full body shivers danced through him.
“If you want me,” she whispered in his ear, “then take me. I’m yours. I trust you not to hurt me, to look after both our needs. I promise to tell you if anything you’re doing doesn’t work for me. So far, I’ve loved every damn thing you’ve done.�
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Zac groaned again. What man alive could resist such an invitation?
He flipped them both over and settled between her thighs. Looking down at her, he was overwhelmed by how incredible she was. It was a miracle she survived growing up in the Carstairs Compound, so alone and isolated, especially when she hid a sassy temperament beneath her quiet exterior. He was damn lucky to be in her arms and in her bed. A new pit in his stomach told him that wasn’t enough anymore.
CHAPTER 33
As so often happened in the deep of the night, Sarai was awakened by a vision. She’d sometimes wondered if the frequency was driven by her mind relaxing as she slept. This one woke her softly, dragging from her sated slumber.
Carefully, she slipped out from under Zac’s arm and out of the bed. She sat down in the cozy arm chair close by and pulled her knees up to her chest. She didn’t even see the view of the mountains illuminated by the full moon outside her window as the images took over. This vision came in a series of scenes, most of which she didn’t fully understand. She wasn’t even positive she was seeing them in chronological order.
First she saw Corrie, the woman from Zac’s Timik who’d pretended to be Sarai. She was sitting in a bedroom, on the bed, rocking back and forth. She looked as though she’d been crying or was trying very hard not to.
No matter how many times and ways Sarai looked at the scene, she couldn’t identify why the girl was upset, or when in time it might be. Corrie didn’t look any older, but that could mean days to years away.
Next came an image of Shane. She knew him from when he’d been part of the Carstairs Dare, although she hadn’t seen him since he’d be driven out. Unlike everyone else, she’d known he wasn’t dead when Andie had claimed him to be. She’d seen him in a vision as he’d ripped off his own ear to fake his demise and keep the dare away.
Now, in this new scene, she couldn’t see much of the scarring, as it was covered by hair he wore at shoulder length. What she could see didn’t detract from just how attractive he’d always been. She hoped he didn’t worry about that.
Sarai shook off that thought and realized that, in this vision, Shane stood surrounded by woods. No snow, which could mean not yet late fall, if it was this year at all. Night had drawn her veiled curtain over the sun. A full moon glowed in the sky. Her animal instincts told her the next full moon was in about three weeks. Shane was yelling Corrie’s name, but there was no sign of the shifter.
The next pictures she saw were just flashes. Wolf shifters running between buildings. Polar bears and cougars fighting them off side-by-side. The Timik, most likely. But, based on the pandemonium and the fact that it was night, she’d guess they’d been ambushed. She could see, which meant there was moonlight, but she didn’t get a glimpse of it to know what phase it was in. She could make out very little else in the chaos of the flashes.
Then back to the original scene with Corrie. Only this time, as Sarai studied the vision, Corrie lifted her head to pin her with a gaze full of such resentment that Sarai was tempted to step back, except in her visions she was never there in the moment. She was just an observer.
“Stay out of my head,” Corrie screamed in a voice so filled with venom that Sarai flinched.
With a gasp, she snapped out of the vision. Her eyes fluttered open to find Zac kneeling in front of her, his brow puckered in concern. “That was a long one.”
She nodded, but her mind wasn’t on Zac for once. It spun with the implications of what she’d just seen. No one had ever interacted with her before. It wasn’t possible. Especially if she was seeing the future, seeing something that had yet to happen. Corrie had to have been talking to someone else, though it just felt like she’d addressed Sarai directly. Right?
Then she realized the more important issue.
She focused on Zac. “I think the Timik is about to be attacked.”
He jumped to his feet, jaw hardened, fists clenched. “When?”
She ran her hands through the damp hair at her temples. “I’m not sure. Best guess…tonight at the earliest, three weeks at the latest.”
“Is anyone hurt? Killed?”
Sarai gave a slow shake of her head. “Not that I could see. They were surprised. Ambushed.”
“Which may mean you’re wrong about the timing.”
She pursed her lips. “That’s possible.”
Zac paced back and forth for a moment and ran his hands through his sleep mussed hair, his sweats hanging low around his hips. “I hate not being there with them. They’re my Timik. Mine to protect.”
Sarai focused inwardly for a moment, but the vision she had of Zac in that cave, bloody and bruised, on his knees before Kyle, hadn’t changed.
Still, she was coming to know this proud shifter—who he was, his character. She realized he’d rather his death become reality if it meant defending the people in his charge. Which meant if she loved him, it had to be okay with her, too.
Sarai closed her eyes. If she loved him. Those words rang in her mind like a gong. Of course, she loved him. Had known she would since the day she’d seen the vision of him in that cave. Otherwise, she would not have fought as hard to change the future.
She loved him.
A mix of elation and dread filled her.
She loved him. Which meant doing what was right for him. “You should go,” she said, before she could stop herself.
Zac’s head whipped toward her. “Did you see me there?”
“No. But you need to be with your people.”
Zac knelt back down in front of the armchair. With a gentle touch that belied the tension radiating from him, he placed his hands on her knees. “I can’t take you with me, kuluk. I can’t protect them and you at the same time.”
Sarai had expected that.
She sat forward to place one hand on his cheek. “I know. I also know you have to do this.”
Zac scooped her up in his arms, then sat back down with her across his lap and wrapped her in his big arms.
“I know what we have is new, and we haven’t talked—”
Sarai stopped him with a finger across his lips. “Shhhh. We don’t need to. Not yet. Just…come back to me.”
He kissed her softly then lay his forehead against hers. “I promise,” he murmured.
****
“Hey, kuluk. It’s time.” Zac’s voice interrupted her moment of quiet.
Sarai sighed as she handed over the baby she’d been rocking, giving her to one of the day care workers. She’d come to the nursery to escape, even if only for a moment.
Much like other dares, Keller had set up child care and a school at the compound. The babies here were from a mix of backgrounds—some had lost parents and were being raised by the dare, some had parents working permanently at the compound, some were with parents visiting the compound. No matter, Sarai found being around babies peaceful. Even when they were screaming. The endless possibilities for their futures gave her hope…and that gave her peace.
“Okay.” She followed him out of the rooms down a series of hallways to the back of the building. Outside a helicopter waited, the rotors already spinning.
After her vision, Zac and Sarai had wasted no time. They’d dressed and quickly gathered Jaxon, Andie, and their Commanders and Protectors to discuss the matter. No one had been very happy when they’d told them about Zac’s plan to return to his Timik. Andie had been the most displeased.
“I have to repeat that I don’t think this is a good idea. Not if they’re after you,” Andie had muttered.
She’d glanced at Sarai. “What do you think about this?”
What she had really been asking was if Sarai saw anything that would dissuade Zac from his course. Zac, George, and Scott were the only people with whom she’d shared her vision of Zac’s death. Sarai had glanced at George, but he’d stared back with a blank expression. No help there. Or from Zac, for that matter. Damn stoic polar bear shifters.
“He has to do this,” was all she’d finally said.
; Zac had reached under the table to squeeze her hand.
That alone had kept her mouth shut the rest of the meeting. Sarai was used to holding secrets—particularly about what she saw—but that was usually only when a positive outcome was at the end of the action. She honestly believed that wasn’t the case this time.
Zac had promised to come home to her. But would he even be alive to do so?
As they walked to the helicopter, Zac reached for her hand. Sarai smiled softly. This was his quiet version of claiming her as his, she guessed.
But she was mistaken. After a series of goodbyes, he came to her last. With a small smile, he yanked her into his arms and laid a kiss on her that would have left no one in doubt as to their relationship. As if that weren’t enough, he turned to Andie. “Watch out for my girl. I expect her to be here, and safe, when I get back.”
Andie’s jaw dropped, but she nodded.
Sarai grinned up at him.
You’re mine, he mouthed.
You’re mine, too, she silently responded.
He grinned back. Then he sobered and trailed his hand down her cheek to brush her lips with the pad of his thumb. The action felt like a brand to Sarai. Even after he disappeared inside the cockpit, she could feel the lingering heat on her skin. She watched him fly away, heart heavy and a lump lodged in her throat.
Something shifted inside her. As the love of her life flew off into the clear blue of the afternoon sky, Sarai slid from terrified for him to hard-boiling fury at fate. The thought suddenly occurred to her that, every time she attempted to manipulate their futures, she’d always tried to save herself or save Zac. She’d never—not once—considered a future where she allowed both of them to face the danger together.
Quickly, she checked to see if that altered the outcome. Her visions hadn’t changed—yet—but she hadn’t expected them to. She also knew that if they both couldn’t live through this, neither would let the other sacrifice himself or herself. Which meant the only acceptable option was to perish together, or at least face whatever the future held together.
That she could do.
