by Alta Hensley
Switching his attention to the bar, Evan's frown increased as he watched her frantically make drinks for the crowd. She seemed more frazzled than normal. No doubt she knew Evan was in the club.
Ruby turned around enough so Evan could see her, the ends of her perfectly shaped mouth curled upward, and Evan felt like a steam engine had slammed straight into his gut. His gaze trailed over her heart-shaped face, her satin-smooth and rich honey-colored skin, her doe-shaped eyes before settling back on her mouth. Lush, now only one corner curled up, lending her an innocent yet somehow slightly wicked look. It was the same mouth, the same look that had haunted his memories for the past few days. He missed her so much. No matter how hard Evan tried, he'd never be able to get her out of his mind.
Chapter 19
Evan was in the club.
Ruby closed her eyes briefly, her heartbeat ricocheting a staccato beat against her chest. It felt more powerful than the base of the speakers only a few feet away. Tears burned the back of her eyes as she tried not to stare at the one man, and the only person, she'd ever loved.
The same man who wanted nothing to do with her.
Ruby tried to swallow down the instant swell of emotions as she finished her shift. She was done for the night. In the past, she would have walked over to Evan and spent the rest of the night with him. But things had changed.
“You don’t have a shot with him anymore. So you might as well leave.” Ruby jumped at the venomous voice behind her. She turned around to see Maxine standing with her hands on her hips. She had rage in her eyes and looked like she planned to pounce. She was obviously high on something as well.
“I’m not in the mood, Maxine. Leave me alone.”
“You’re not welcome here. You intended on using Evan from the very beginning, didn’t you? You’re nothing but a lying slut,” Maxine spat.
“This is none of your business.” Ruby took a deep breath to calm her temper. She tried to see the situation through Maxine’s eyes. To Maxine, and everyone else, Ruby was the villain.
“Listen, I didn’t mean to hurt Evan.”
Maxine shoved her finger into Ruby’s chest. “You are nothing but a dirty whore. You can’t give Evan what he wants and what he needs.”
Her comment stung. Ruby no longer could contain her anger. Ruby looked her straight in the eye. “No Maxine, you are the whore. You will do anything, and I mean anything, for fame. You are nothing but a dirty, used-up woman who will never find happiness.”
“You fucking bitch!” Maxine screamed.
Maxine charged at her and grabbed a chunk of her hair and rammed Ruby’s head against the wall. Ruby saw stars and her vision blurred, but she didn’t feel any real pain. Ruby was in shock at the attack. Maxine continued her assault by attempting to hit and punch Ruby’s face. For the most part, Ruby did a good job blocking her flaying hands. Everything happened so fast, and Ruby was still stunned from having her head bashed against the wall; she wasn’t really sure what happened around her. Ruby realized she needed to fight back. It wasn’t her style, but she had no choice.
Ruby reached for the back of Maxine’s hair and grabbed an entire fistful. She yanked Maxine’s head back as far as it could go without snapping her neck. “Listen, you fucked up whack job,” Ruby yanked her hair even harder. “You stay away from me. If I see you even glance my direction, I will beat you to a fucking pulp. Are we clear?” Ruby yanked Maxine’s head, causing Maxine to release a scream of shock mixed with pain.
Maxine’s scream caught everyone’s attention nearby. All eyes nearby now cast in their direction. Ruby’s eyes glanced over to where Evan sat. She felt instantly grateful the loud club music concealed what was going on. Evan had no idea what was happening. Ruby released Maxine’s hair and returned her glare.
Maxine reached for her head and tried to rub out the sting. “I can’t believe you just did that, you cunt!”
Ruby’s rage exploded. “What was that? What did you just call me?” She got right into Maxine’s face, challenging her to say it again.
Ruby quickly glanced in the security guard’s direction. He was approaching the crowd, getting ready to break up the fight. He surprised Ruby when he gave her a small nod of approval, letting Ruby know he was on her side and backing her decision.
Maxine leaned in and spat, “I called you by what you are. Cunt. You cunt!”
Ruby pulled her arm back, and, with as much force as she could muster, she brought her closed fist to the side of Maxine’s face. The punch caused Maxine to stumble back against the wall behind her.
Ruby ignored the shooting pain working its way through her hand. “When you start something with me, Maxine, you better damn sure be prepared to finish it.”
Ruby then grabbed Maxine’s hair once again and rammed her head into the wall she was up against. “You stay away from me.”
Maxine crumpled to the floor and looked up at Ruby in disbelief. “Fuck you!” she screamed.
Ruby mimicked classic prissy smile. “Tisk, tisk… such language from a lady. Maybe you should run off and find someone to give you a spanking.” Ruby spun on her heels and left.
The fight was over, and, even though Ruby had lost control, she felt great. She was happy Evan didn’t witness her temper because she was sure it didn’t show her in the best light. But it was about time Maxine got taught a thing or two.
Getting ready to leave, her eyes locked with Evan's. For a long moment, they simply stared at one another, the days spent apart falling away as though they'd never happened.
Evan’s face seemed to soften, giving Ruby the courage to approach him. Maybe she was crazy, but she had to try. She had to talk and explain. She would apologize a thousand times if that’s what it took. She missed and loved Evan more than she thought possible.
“Now’s not the time, Ruby,” Evan said, his voice barely heard over the music.
“Evan…” Her voice trailed away. “Can we talk? Please.”
Evan’s face hardened, losing its momentary softness. “There’s nothing left to say. I’ve heard your apologies, your constant messages begging for forgiveness. I’m over it, Ruby.”
“I don’t know what to do to make this right! I love you, and…”
Evan had already started shaking his head before Ruby could finish speaking.
Ruby wiped away the tears from her cheeks, but she saw the uncertainty in Evan’s eyes before he looked away. Ruby felt as though her entire world fell apart around her. She forced a smile shakily past the tears and nodded her head, finally accepting defeat. Evan was over her for good.
Exhaling a long, shaky breath, fighting back the emotions, Ruby shot out, “I didn’t realize our relationship was so fragile.”
Tension in Evan’s jaw and the glistening of tears in his eyes indicated that she'd hit a nerve. She had managed to chip away at the wall Evan created around his heart.
Evan stood up and advanced on her, not stopping until he stood so close Ruby could smell the unique scent that seemed to belong to him alone. She closed her eyes, taking an involuntary deep breath, sparking the familiar desire that melted her and devastated her at the same time.
Ruby's gaze dipped to Evan's mouth – full, perfect, and inviting. What would Evan do if she kissed him? Would he push her away? Maybe it was worth the risk.
Ruby’s eyes trailed lower, down the line of his throat, to the simple V-neck black tee Evan wore beneath his jacket. His chest beckoned to be touched.
“Don’t you dare turn this around on me,” Evan hissed only inches from Ruby’s face. “I’m not the one who destroyed us. You are.”
“Then let me fix us,” Ruby pleaded.
“Fix us?” he asked, laughing harshly. “There’s no ‘us’ anymore.”
Ruby decided to take a huge risk and brought her hand up to Evan’s face, trailing her fingers along the flush that stained his cheek, left behind from his anger. Evan jerked his head away angrily and his chin hitched up, but Ruby saw the flare of emotion in his eyes before he turned away
from her.
Ruby’s face inches from his, she ran her gaze over Evan, watching the wall crumble even further. She didn’t want to stop. It was a temptation she couldn't resist. Ruby kissed him.
The minute her mouth made contact with Evan’s, Ruby released a low moan, her body reacting as though it had been an eternity since they last touched. She pressed closer against Evan’s body, forgetting they were in a busy nightclub.
Evan didn't just kiss her, he consumed her. Evan’s tongue stroked across the seam of her lips, demanding an entry she desperately wanted to give.
In a rushed movement, Evan grabbed Ruby by the hand and led her out the doors into the parking lot. Without saying a word, Evan grasped her butt and lifted her up, placing her on the hood of a car, before pulling her thighs apart and settling within her spread legs.
When the velvet smoothness of Evan’s tongue stroked inside her mouth, Ruby opened her mouth wider, meeting Evan’s tongue with her own in a hot, desperate dueling match.
“Evan…” she whispered against his mouth when Evan broke the kiss, running his tongue over Ruby’s lips. She moaned as Evan’s hand tunneled beneath her skirt, cupping her moistened panties.
Evan’s hand slid under the fabric and stroked over her mound, dipping past her silken folds. Pressing past her entrance, Evan thrust his finger in and out without breaking the passionate kiss.
Feverish, Ruby brought her hands to cup Evan’s erection, her eyes fluttering closed as Evan’s finger pumped deeper within. Ruby couldn't get close enough to Evan, couldn't get enough of his kiss, enough of his finger pulling the passion from her body.
God, she thought she had lost this. Lost the chance to make love to him. Her heart beat so fast she could barely catch her breath. She had Evan back. Evan was in her arms again.
Ruby wrapped her legs around Evan’s lean waist, her body on fire from Evan’s touch. Ruby attacked Evan’s mouth with carnal ferocity, her tongue pushing past his lips to breach the cavern of his mouth.
Ruby released a ragged moan, one that came from deep within her soul, from her broken heart. She had missed Evan so much, his touch, his kisses, but more importantly… his love.
With a low growl, Evan pushed away, turning his back to her, striding a short distance away, enough space to cool the heat between them.
“Evan?”
Evan kept his back to Ruby, standing there in silence. Very slowly, he faced her. “At least it’s clear what you’ve always wanted. I guess I was a fool to think you were more than just a groupie.”
Evan’s statement felt like ice thrown on the heat of passion that had threatened to consume her only moments ago. She eased herself off the hood of the car, heat covering her entire body as she met his cold, emotionless stare. Fighting back the flood of tears, she desperately searched Evan’s eyes for explanation. The sudden need to escape made her heart pound even harder against her chest.
“What are you talking about, Evan? Are you treating me like a groupie?” She could barely say the words.
What she saw in Evan’s eyes now brought a pang to her heart. Anger reached out and nearly strangled Ruby in its intensity. Anger for lying, for keeping her reason of moving here a secret, for not trusting in their love. Anger for destroying the relationship they had built in such a short time.
“If you act like a groupie, you get treated like one. An emotionless hookup,” Evan stated quietly, his voice carefully matter-of-fact.
“Evan, please don’t be cruel. It kills me—”
“I’ve been used more times than I can count. People I think love me, or even like me, for me, are just using me for a connection. I had no idea you were doing that. I was blind!” he snapped, his words like a knife, carving into Ruby.
“It wasn't like that, Evan. You have to know that,” Ruby said, taking a step toward Evan before stopping, wiping at the streaming tears coursing down her face. “No matter what you now believe, I… I love you.”
“Love me?” He laughed with venom. “You experimented with me,” he said, anger tightening his features. “You wanted the inside scoop on Domestic Discipline. You explored with me. And you fucked with me!” Fire burned in his eyes.
Unable to stand seeing the pain in Evan’s eyes, Ruby turned. Her voice low, she said, “I was insecure. I was afraid that any wrong step I made would mean losing you. I didn’t have enough faith in us as a couple. I guess I didn’t have enough trust in you. I should have told you the truth. It was the stupidest thing I could have done.” Ruby stopped, taking a deep breath as a sob choked her. “I—I was acting like a stupid love-struck child. I created drama that didn’t need to exist.”
Ruby stopped, her throat clogged with grief, blinking rapidly in an attempt to stop the tears burning her eyes. Afraid if she kept crying, she'd never be able to stop. She fought to keep it together, forcing herself to go on.
“I'm sorry, Evan. I owed you the truth about what I do for a living and this stupid article. I just didn't know what to do as the lie grew each time I let you believe otherwise,” she said, offering a helpless shake of her head. “I made it a bigger deal than it was.” Ruby paused and drew in a breath. “And it was probably the biggest mistake I've ever made. I didn't mean to hurt you.” Ruby paused before continuing. “I wasn't using you. I wasn't faking my desire to be submissive to you. I wanted what you wanted, but I don’t expect you to believe me. I know I lost that trust. I'm so sorry.” She merely whispered her last words.
As if a miracle just happened, Evan strode over to her, dragging Ruby into his arms, holding her close. “Ruby, didn't you know how much I loved you?” he asked, pulling away enough to stare into her face. “That if you had just told me the truth, I would have understood? I wouldn’t have acted like an asshole. I would have trusted in our love. You were my world, Ruby,” he said as he brushed his fingertips over Ruby’s tear-stained cheeks, cupping her face with his palms.
“I loved you. I pictured building a life with you. When you got caught in the lie, my entire world crumbled. All those dreams I had, they were dreams of us, places I wanted to go… with you.” Evan glared. “I wanted to be with you. Didn't you know that?”
Ruby saw tenderness and hurt mingled in Evan’s eyes. She also saw lingering anger, an anger she deserved.
“I'm sorry.” That was all Ruby could verbalize right then. So many conflicting emotions coursed throughout her body that she felt almost sagged down by the weight of them as she moved her hand slowly to Evan's. Tears pooled in her eyes, burning them. But she willed herself to hold them back for once.
“I know you are,” Evan finally whispered.
“I'll do whatever it takes to make this right with you,” Ruby said, seeming to find her voice. “I want to earn back your trust. Do you want me to stop writing this article?” Even though Ruby made the offer, deep down she didn't know if she would be able to follow through with that. She was under contract.
Evan shook his head, his voice even as he spoke. “I don't expect you to do that. I would never ask that of you.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, his eyes moving heavenward for a moment. “I guess I've known that you never really used me. It was just a lie, but I know, deep down, that your heart has been in the right place.”
“I know that none of this would have happened if I just trusted you would understand,” Ruby murmured. “This shouldn't have been an issue.” The tears she had held back finally gave way. “I embarrassed you in front of your friends.”
Evan shook his head. “You don't need to worry about them. They've seen a lot more drama than that.”
“I don't want them to ever doubt my love for you. I don't want you to ever doubt my love, either.”
“That's a tough one,” Evan murmured in a voice so quiet Ruby almost didn't hear him. But she did, and the tears fell faster.
“You cared about me once, Evan,” she said as she wiped at her moist face. “Maybe you could learn to care about me again – someday?” She sounded like a little girl desperate for affection a
nd she hated it, but she needed Evan. She wanted Evan. Not just because he made her feel appreciated and cared for, but because when she was in Evan's arms, she felt complete. And she loved Evan and hoped their love deserved another chance.
“I didn't stop caring about you. I'll always care about you and want what's best for you.”
“You are what is best for me.”
Evan shook his head. “I wish I could say I one hundred percent believed that. Because you stole my heart the day I saw you in the club.” Evan smiled a bit. “But that was… like a dream, Ruby. We lived this fast and furious love affair that maybe was always bound to come crashing down.”
“Don't say that, Evan,” Ruby pleaded. “Don't give up on us. Please.”
“I think I'm just facing reality.”
“Do you love me enough to stay with me?” Ruby asked as more tears slid down her face.
“I love you. I have since I met you. The whole issue with this story and Harold reminded me that you still have a life in San Francisco. You still plan on going back and building your career. As much as I want to be selfish and just take you in my arms and make love to you and promise you everything will be all right, I can't. I know that long-distance relationships don't work out.”
“I decided long ago, long before this whole mess, that I was staying here… with you,” Ruby cried.
Evan looked moved by her admission and slowly pulled Ruby close to his chest. Ruby closed her eyes for a brief moment as she felt a whisper of a touch on her face as Evan began to dab at her tears with the pads of his warm, gentle fingertips.
“I think you need to move back,” he said in a hushed voice as Ruby opened her eyes and stared at Evan in shock. “I can't do this.”
In one swift motion, Evan turned around and walked back in the club without saying another word, leaving Ruby standing there stunned.
“You don't know who you fucking messed with!” Ruby jumped at the wicked declaration suddenly right behind her. She turned around to see Maxine standing with a knife pointed in her direction. Her dilated eyes revealed an evil inside. Drugs, alcohol, hatred, and a weapon made a deadly mix. Ruby's heart stopped as Maxine charged.
