“Who was that?” Frederica asked, righting herself. She got points for not criticizing my driving.
“The mayor.”
“You don’t like him?” she asked.
I looked over and saw her filming me. Great.
“I like him fine.” The pale face was skeptical. “It’s just that my dad is running against him for mayor and tempers are riding high.”
“Oh,” she said thoughtfully and went back to peering out the side of the cart. She was being diligent about looking for foxglove even though it was a largely futile endeavor. The season was past and there were no more easily identified flowers.
By lunch time we had only found one new front yard with foxglove in it. Mrs. Adams was my retired fifth grade teacher. She is peppery and screechy because she is hard of hearing, but uses a walker and avoids all places with stairs, and besides she has never shown any disposition to poisoning her neighbors. I needed a better suspect to take to the Chief if I was going to turn suspicion away from my family.
My phone shrieked as we neared the cemetery on Joy Street and I flinched. My ring-tone is a toucan’s screech that rivals nails on chalkboard for annoying sound. A quick look confirmed my hunch that it was Althea calling. I opted not to answer.
“I can fix that for you if you don’t like it,” Frederica said. The child was very observant.
“Good.” I handed her the phone. “I’ve tried and tried and nothing works.”
“Do you like ‘Adam-12’?” she asked, and in that moment won my heart. I had had the greatest crush on Kent McCord who played Officer Jim Reed on Adam-12. “Or maybe ‘Hawaii Five-O’? They don’t always have all the old shows.”
“Either.” Hell, shotgun blasts would be an improvement over that bird.
“Oh look—‘George of the Jungle’.”
“No,” I said. “It isn’t professional.”
The girl nodded seriously and punched more buttons.
Frederica, Alex and I met for lunch at Other Falls Park. Alex had stopped at the Italian deli and came bearing a fortifying lunch and my dog. I felt a little silly being filmed with Blue but I didn’t let it stop our joyous reunion.
Blue and the sandwich were the good things that Alex brought. The bad part was the news that Dale Gordon had a twenty-two.
My phone rang again, only this time it played the theme from “Get Smart”. I guess our first choices hadn’t been available.
“Althea again,” I said and then looked over at Frederica. “Camera off, okay? I can’t talk about an ongoing investigation on film.”
“Okay.” Frederica looked gratified to be taken into my confidence.
“I think lardhead has been suspended. Or at least told to take some vacation. And that has to look real bad to everyone when we are as short-handed as we are. There will be a presumption of guilt. And if this derails the wedding Althea will kill me.”
“Even though it may be Gordon who has played these pranks on her?” Alex asked.
“Look, she’s bought her dress, booked the caterer, and made a down payment on her flowers and cake. Gordon could turn out to be a cannibal and she wouldn’t care at this point as long as he made it to the altar.”
“Then I guess we had better keep digging. What’s on for this afternoon?” he asked.
“Officer Bill is going to visit the nursery school. You?”
“I’m handing out flyers at the town dump. It’s hazardous waste recycling day and your dad is going to be making a speech.”
“I just hope the mayor doesn’t have the same idea. It would look bad if they came to blows.” I knelt and hugged Blue. Frederica did the same. Blue didn’t mind. “Well, take care of my dog. I’ll see you around five?”
“Definitely. Bye for now.” His lips brushed my cheek. Though I was relieved at his decorum, I was also maybe just the tiniest bit disappointed that he didn’t say anything about loving me again.
Chapter 11
Officer Bill had no bad history with the nursery school and the children actually wanted to hug him and sit in his lap. Frederica immortalized this happy moment and I was okay with that because I would have proof that I don’t always frighten people with Officer Bill.
Feeling a little guilty and worried that maybe Althea had called for some reason other than to chew me out, we took a drive by my mom’s place. Half way down the block, Theresa Booker hailed me and I stopped to see what she wanted. Her kitten, Lucky Seven, had climbed up the elm tree in the front yard and couldn’t get down. In other places they call the fire department for this kind of thing, but not in Hope Falls.
Not thrilled to be making the climb with the wind on the rise, I nevertheless made the scramble up the swaying tree and rescued the unhappy ball of fluff. At this point it was a quarter to five and I was feeling like I had paid my dues to the community.
Weariness did not stop me from noticing that there was some fluid puddled under Althea’s car as we drove past the house.
“Damn it. I have to stop.” I looked at Frederica. “Wait here.”
I jumped out of the car and ran up to the porch. There was more glitter on the doormat. Althea peered at me through the peephole when I knocked and then opened the door. I could see Gordon huddled on the sofa, looking miserable. I guess they were facing the first withered tomato in their organic salad bowl of love.
“Something is leaking from your car and it isn’t window cleaner.” I didn’t know brake fluid from motor oil but it all seemed like stuff one shouldn’t drive without.
“What?”
“Call Dad and have him take a look. Don’t drive the car until he says it’s okay.” I looked Althea in the eye and made sure she understood what I was implying.
“You want to come in?” She sounded shaken.
“I don’t want to get glitter on my shoes and track it home. It gets on the cats and then they lick themselves.” This was true but not the biggest reason I wanted to avoid my cousin. I believe in rallying around when there is a family crisis but Gordon wasn’t family yet and I couldn’t think of any way to cheer him up.
“Maybe I should get a cat,” Gordon said morosely from the depths of the sofa. “Or a dog. No one else will talk to me.”
Maybe you should change your name and join the French Foreign Legion, I thought, but didn’t say it out loud.
“Chins up, guys,” I said with as much optimism as I could muster. “We’re going to get this straightened out. Just give it a little more time”
Gordon remained morose but Althea looked a little better. I waved and then hurried back to my cart before she could ask for details on the investigation.
“I have a cousin too,” Frederica said. “She shaves her head so she can show off her spider tattoos.”
“Family,” I answered in commiseration. “But what can you do?”
At that point I was more than ready for the day to be over, but of course it wasn’t. I got to the end of the block and found the mayor ripping down my father’s campaign posters and stomping all over them as he shrieked some really profane things.
“Shouldn’t you do something about that? That’s vandalism, isn’t it?” Frederica asked. Her camera was pointed at the mayor, who turned at that moment and saw me. Instead of looking guilty, he flashed me the finger.
“I should, but I can’t. He’ll have me fired.” We watched him stomp over to his car—illegally parked across someone’s driveway— then peeled away with a screeching of tires. The camera followed him. “So, tell me about your blog. Do a lot of people read it?”
“The blog is good. I have twelve hundred subscribers. But I think putting this on youtube would be even better. The only thing is my pc is in for repairs so it might be a few days before I can post it.” Frederica looked up at me. “Unless you have a computer I can use.”
“As a matter of fact, I do. Will your parents worry if you’re late getting home?” I asked.
“No. But I’ll call them anyway. They don’t make a big deal about it but they always worry that I�
�ll turn out like my cousin.”
“Okay then.”
I knew that I shouldn’t let Frederica post this video. Or at least I shouldn’t help her post it. But seeing the mayor ripping up my father’s signs had made me angry. My dad, though a lousy police chief, had as much right to run for mayor as anyone else. There might not be much I could do for Althea right now, but I could help my dad.
Having a child around is a responsibility and one of the main things to do is feed them when they are hungry. I was out of turkey but still had a nice stash of pie and cookies. A quick call arranged for a pizza to be delivered.
Alex arrived just as Frederica was ready to upload her files. Feeling a bit punchy after a day with my father, or maybe just curious about my guest, he asked to see the whole day’s video. Some of it was fun. I liked seeing Blue and I together, and I was proud of Officer Bill not making the children cry. I was less thrilled at seeing my backside as I clambered up the Booker’s elm tree after their kitten. Fortunately Frederica had done some panning around and—
“Stop it!” I shouted. “Go back. Look at Althea’s car!”
Frederica did something and the picture froze and then went back to my mom’s house.
“It’s the gnome,” I said. “And it’s a girl.”
“And not the supermodel,” Alex said. “The backside is ah… too bony.”
“Look at her shoes. That’s glitter. I think that’s…”
“Mitzi Gordon,” Alex finished. “What is she doing?”
“Cutting Althea’s brake-lines, I bet. Did you talk to dad after he went to Althea’s?”
“No.”
I had my phone out.
“Dad! What was wrong with Althea’s car?” I had my confirmation and turned to grin at Alex and Frederica. “Thanks, Dad. Oh—I have a present for you. We’ll show you tomorrow. No, better than an invitation from the Daughters of the Gold Rush. Talk to you later. Bye.”
I looked at Frederica who was smiling hopefully.
“This is important?” she asked.
“You may have cracked a murder case,” I told her and was pleased when her rare smile bloomed. “I’ve got to call the Chief.”
The Chief was pleased with the news since this was a solid lead, but insisted on seeing the video for himself. Frederica and Alex between them had no trouble mailing him the clip and he was able to watch it while I waited on the phone. I think that they also uploaded some things to YouTube and Frederica’s blog.
The pizza arrived while I was pacing and Alex got the door and paid for it. He dished me up a slice but I was too excited to eat.
“Are you ready to make an arrest?” the Chief asked. “You’ve earned the right.”
Was I ready?
I thought of Dale Gordon and my cousin, Althea. On the downside, I would be arresting Dale’s mom. But, on the bright side, we were arresting Dale’s mom and getting her out of the picture. Dale might not forgive me, but Althea would.
“Okay. Shall we meet at Mitzi’s house—uh, you are going to be there, aren’t you?”
“Absolutely.”
“And you aren’t going to call Dale first, are you?”
“Do you think I’m nuts?” And the Chief hung up the phone.
“Want to come help me arrest someone?” I asked Alex and Frederica. “You can wait in the car.”
Chapter 12
The Chief was waiting outside Mitzi’s house and looking a bit like a grizzly bear in his overcoat. The temperature had dropped enough that his breath had gathered around him in a white cloud.
The craven part of me that had hoped for a reprieve was disappointed to see lights on in the bungalow and the shadows of some TV program bouncing around the drapes. Blue whined, sensing my reluctance. I patted her head and got out of the car, then I smiled at Alex and waggled a hand at Frederica and Blue in the backseat.
“Back soon,” I promised.
“Who is that with you?” The Chief asked as I joined him on the sidewalk.
“Alex, Frederica and Blue,” I admitted.
“Your honor student?” The Chief goggled and then shook his head.
“It’s her film that gave us the lead and she wanted to be here at the end. Her parents said it was okay.” I didn’t tell him that she was still filming.
The Chief kept shaking his head. He was still doing it when we climbed onto the porch and rang the bell.
Mitzi threw the door open.
“Well, it’s about ti—oh. What do you want?” The voice wasn’t welcoming but it wasn’t completely hostile either.
“May we come in?” I asked gently. “I’m sorry that it’s so late but this couldn’t wait for morning.”
Mitzi’s eyes got round and her face paled.
“Dale! Is he….”
“Oh no,” I said reassuringly. “It isn’t anything that bad. Dale hasn’t been hurt or arrested.”
The Chief stared at me. I can’t blame him. But I had begun to believe that in Mitzi’s world, where Dale was the center of the universe, this was actually the truth. Being arrested herself was better than hearing her son was injured.
“Well, good. Come on in. I’ll just turn down the TV.”
We entered slowly. The chemical smell was overpowering. The carpets, furniture and even the walls were spattered with gold glitter. There were hundreds, maybe thousands of gold roses all over the room along with several cans of spray paint.
“Take a seat. I’ll make some tea.”
“Not for me,” I said. Then, taking the bull by the horns—since the Chief seemed to have been struck dumb. “Digitalis can be poisonous.”
“Don’t I know it. Finished my old man off,” she said cheerfully. “Thought that bastard would never die.”
The Chief shifted his weight. He had been prepared for violence and hysteric denials, not an unrepentant Alice in Wonderland.
“Your husband? He was a tea drinker?” I asked.
“Yes, but it was fire that got him in the end. He smoked in bed.” She flopped onto the sofa.
“Always dangerous,” I agreed. “Why have you been playing tricks on Althea? You don’t want her dead, do you?”
“I wasn’t trying to kill Althea,” Mitzi said, affronted. “I just wanted her to be… more receptive to my help with the wedding. And she needs to lose some weight. She’s been snacking and putting it on in the caboose. She’ll have an ass as big as Texas if she doesn’t do something about it. I told Dale that digitalis is good for weight control.”
And for causing congestive heart failure.
“Receptive how?” The Chief asked, finally taking part in the conversation.
“If she were under the weather a bit then she would have to let others help more with the wedding.”
“I see.”
“I wouldn’t hurt Althea. Why I even got rid of that horrible Silly when she came back to make trouble.” I blinked and looked toward the Chief. He nodded. Mrs. Gordon wasn’t just a killer, she was bug-munching mad. “Went to the trouble of buying a wig and hat and everything for a disguise though I had to throw them away after.”
“You got the wig so you would look like Silly’s girlfriend?” I suggested.
“Girlfriend! That’s unnatural, you know. She turned Silly away from my Gordon.”
I nodded, thinking that I sure didn’t want to be the one to tell Gordon about his mother. I did want to be the one to tell Althea though. Maybe she would rethink that having kids thing.
“I’m sure that Dale and Althea appreciate your concern,” I lied. “But you do know that it was illegal, right?”
“Yeah, no discharging firearms within the city limits. Dale told me. That’s why I was going out to the island.”
“And that’s why you threw my aunt’s gun in the lake?” I asked, knowing we should Mirandize her before she said anything else, but feeling fairly sure that she would never stand trial.
“Well, I couldn’t tell which was hers and which was Gordon’s and I didn’t know which one I had used, so it s
eemed best to get rid of both of them.”
“Sensible,” I said. “A bit of a pain to retrieve though. Especially if the lake freezes over.”
“Sorry about that. Shall I get my coat now?” she asked. Mitzi had never sounded more reasonable.
“That might be best. It’s really cold out tonight.”
“You’ll call Gordon?” she asked.
“Right away,” I promised.
“Well, okay then. You should have let him arrest me though—a collar would look good on his record. And he is expecting this to happen.”
Yep. Bug-munching mad.
Chapter 13
“But chief, it wasn’t my idea to put the mayor on youtube. And I sure didn’t tip off the local news station about the vandalism.” I defended myself since we were standing out where everyone could hear us. Eddie Round’s funeral had been that morning and everyone was needing a distraction. It helped the mood some that Eddie hadn’t been murdered by Mitzi Gordon. It meant that Dale could come back at the end of his vacation and not be cold-shouldered. “And I can’t help it if the mayor is going around ripping down my dad’s posters in front of witnesses. What did you want me to do? Confiscate her camera?”
All heads turned toward the Chief.
“Kids! I suppose she wants to be a detective now.” He lobbed the conversational ball back at me. The Chief wasn’t touching my assertion that our current mayor was a hot-headed jerk though I knew he shared my view.
“No. You’re in luck there. She has decided to be an investigative reporter,” I assured him. “She thinks police work is too constrictive and stifles initiative and creativity.”
And back to the Chief.
“Well, thank God for small favors.” This sounded heartfelt. The Chief turned away and then paused at the door to his office. “The wedding is still on then? In spite of Mrs. Gordon being in a psych ward?”
“Yes. Althea and Gordon are still determined to tie the noose.”
Death in a Turkey Town: A Chloe Boston Mystery Page 8
