“It’s not like we should have cut his neck right when we found him,” Jane pointed out. “Don’t blame yourself, it’s really impossible to see anything without a microscope- ”
“See what?” Chad asked sharply and turned back to them. He looked over them all, resting his gaze on Pain in the end, and she looked back at him, her face uneasy.
And as their gazes locked, Jane saw it.
She saw what Ryan had told her about. A few days ago, when they were having that awkward conversation back home about Chad and Pain, and how Ryan thought she looked at Chad strangely. It really was true, and she realized it had always been there, only now it was more profound than ever. It was as if Pain avoided looking at him directly, as if she braced herself every time before she had to do it. Her expression lost some of that bored arrogance and got first unsure and then set, like she was forcing herself into it. And Jane could guess why.
She knew how sometimes you get distracted with little details of your loved ones, how easily you refocus from what they are saying to the way their lips move or the color of their eyes changes under the light. How your mind betrays you at such moments, and you are no longer confident in what you might say or what they might see in your face. You don’t want to seem stupid or weak. You don’t want to show that somebody has that power over you. Because otherwise you would have to let them in, let them change your life, and it’s scary and unpredictable and unsafe, at least, that’s what we all think. She could imagine how multiplied it was for Pain, with her independent nature, how scared she was from feeling this way. She must have hated it, Jane thought, and then her sister’s voice brought her back.
“Somebody put a tattoo on your Mark so that nobody would know that you’re a- ” she seemed to choke on the word, “Ghost…”
“What??” Chad interrupted her, dumbfounded. “I don’t remember having a Mark ever!”
“And you wouldn’t,” she answered, “if it was done since you were a child. Besides, it’s kinda on the back of your neck,” she pointed out.
“But he’s twenty-three! He’s grown a lot. No tattoo would last that long without correcting or something,” Jane interrupted.
“Exactly. So actually, the tattoo was applied a few times. And it was pretty long ago that they did it the last time, because the edges of the Mark are already visible a little from under it.” She had got that cold, didactic tone back on, and Chad hated it, hated the practical interest with which she was talking about something so vital for him.
He stared at her from above, trying to hide his annoyance, but already his hands were trembling again.
“But I don’t remember any procedures like this. It’s not like I wouldn’t notice getting a tattoo, as long as I’m not in Vegas, drunk and passed out!” He clenched his fists, telling himself to calm down because really there was no sense in getting any more stressed out. He couldn’t know anything for sure until he talked to his father, and it certainly wouldn’t happen in the next few hours. Actually, not until the problem with Eugene was solved. He understood it all, but still felt the rage build in his chest, the blood beat into his temples faster and faster, and he wondered if these temper tantrums would never really pass. No overreacting, no overreacting, he tried to breathe slower, and for a moment it helped.
“I think they could have drugged you or something… ”
God, she’s not helping!
“Drugged me??” he exclaimed, throwing up his hands. “You just don’t know my father! I’d never believe that he would do something like that, and most of all, that he’s a retired Sky Ghost!” he snarled, and everyone backed away from him involuntarily.
He flinched, seeing that, seeing the look on Pain’s face – confused, lost, frustrated. She cared, he realized with surprise. And he was yelling at her, after all she had been through this night. God, this was so not what he wanted to tell her from the moment he got Initiated. When did it all get so absurd?
And then there was Dave, and the way he was looking at Chad was completely unfamiliar. It seemed he just couldn’t make the wide-eyed expression leave his face. Chad quickly averted his eyes, not wanting to see that wary curiosity on his friend’s face.
“Maybe you’re a half-breed!” Jane’s voice sounded suddenly. “He can be a half-breed, can’t he? Then his father doesn’t have to be a Ghost.” She looked at her sister, her eyes full of hope.
Pain shook her head.
“No,” she cut off. “Absolutely not, look at him!” She threw a hand in Chad’s direction, and only then Jane noticed how the air around him shifted and trembled, distorting the city lights far away. “He’s just too strong. I saw a half-breed being Initiated, it’s heaven and earth.”
“My father isn’t a Ghost,” Chad repeated stubbornly. “He just can’t be.”
Everyone fell silent for a minute. There was only the sound of wind and Chad’s ragged breathing and a muffled sound of an ambulance siren far below. Finally, Pain broke the silence again:
“In the morning you were sure you’re human. Now, are you sure he’s your real father?” she said in a quiet voice and regretted these words immediately, seeing his expression change into a stricken mask.
“Do you have to always state the obvious??” he snapped with bitter sarcasm and turned away, pressing his hands to his face.
He didn’t mean to be rude to her, but the idea was just too shocking, too impossible even as a vague assumption in his head, let alone as a verbal conclusion.
Pain dropped her gaze, clenching and unclenching her fists in annoyance. Well, somebody had to say it. It wasn’t like she drew any pleasure from it. Why was she always the bad one for just being able to admit the truth?? She sighed inwardly, folding her arms on her chest. After all, it wasn’t her fault his life was so twisted. She only tried to untangle it all for him, and in return she was the one to be picked on? No, thanks, the consolation part was over.
She looked to the right, in the direction where home was, and took her gloves from under her belt. She still didn’t know what happened at the Headquarters, and she was wasting time here being yelled at. In a few feet away from her, Chad exhaled loudly and dragged a hand over his face, turning back to them. And when she looked at him, took in the expression on his face, all her thoughts, resentments, and resolutions seemed to dissipate like a summer haze chased away by a fresh breeze.
It just wasn’t right. Nobody deserved to be deceived all their life, to be deprived of their real destiny, to find out like this, through this nightmare and suicide. It was all written on his face now, and she held back a groan as the wrongness of the situation overwhelmed her. Without thinking, she closed the distance between them and took him by the elbows, looking up into his eyes.
“Look, it’s not like it’s bad news. It’s actually good for you. You see what’s going on. You couldn’t stay out of it even as a human, now at least you have some advantage. We’ll deal with the rest, I promise. We’ll find out everything about your past as soon as possible,” her voice was honest, sure, and he believed every word that had escaped her lips. But it didn’t really help, because the uneasy feeling was still gnawing on him from the inside, like a greedy, persistent worm.
He nodded and pulled her closer – it did help, and she seemed to be too distracted to protest.
“Anyway, what happened when you jumped off the roof?” she asked.
He shrugged, thinking about which details he should leave out and what was important.
“When I knocked that Beast off, he got pretty angry and tried to stab me with his sword. Somehow I managed to turn the sword in his direction and stab him instead. So I got rid of him, but started to fall quickly. That’s when everything flashed before my eyes – it’s really true what they say about it! I saw my father, the farm, and then some moments here, in the city. And after that, I saw how we met,” he looked at Pain, his eyes burning. There was no point in keeping it substantial, he decided. There was so much, all kinds of emotions, all new to him, mixing and boiling somewhe
re deep in his chest.
She was waiting for his next words, her face so genuinely surprised, stripped of the usual arrogance and contempt. She was beaten and haggard and dirty, her bottom lip split and covered in blood, her hair pasted to the temples, and her eyelids tired – he barely cared. All he saw were her eyes, black and wide, concerned and honest. He continued, his voice a harsh whisper now so that only she could hear him,
“I saw you, you were all I could think about at those last moments, all that I needed, and the idea of losing you after we just met was enough to kill me, Pain. Just remembering it now…” He looked away for a moment. “It’s the worst thing I’ve ever known. Do you understand, do you know what I mean?” he asked, glimpsing a commotion behind Pain. It was Jane shifting uneasily in her spot, and he remembered that he had deviated from the original question.
He raised his voice, making an effort to tear his eyes from Pain’s shocked face and look at her sister and Dave.
“I had only a couple of seconds before I would hit the ground, and then I shot up. I thought I was dead. It all was just too confusing and surreal – the light, the rush, like I caught on fire or something. You were there, at the edge, and at first I didn’t understand what you were waiting for,” he looked at Pain again. “Not that it mattered to me at the moment. But only when you started talking to me, I did realize that you could see me. And the fact that I was able to touch you, it cleared my head a little, too.” He smiled weakly, itching to tuck back a loose lock of her hair that flew in the wind, to cup her face, flushed and surprised, to feel something aside from her gear-clad waist under his fingers. But Jane and Dave were watching, and he didn’t dare to.
Pain was speechless. She knew she was never good at expressing her true feelings, but this time there was more to it. She couldn’t even grasp herself everything that filled her head. There seemed to be no energy for it, either, so she could only stand and stare at him, awfully aware of the fact that somehow he turned out to be holding her, and if not for that, she wouldn’t be very steady on her feet. And then Jane broke the silence, asking the question that Pain dreaded most of all.
“You seem awfully grave about all this,” she noted in a tentative voice. “I mean, you could join us now. Doesn’t it make you even a little bit excited?”
Chad blinked.
“Yeah, like it’s all a dream world, the one you live in.” He scoffed and shook his head, and Pain made a small step back, feeling his mood change instantly. “Join you for what? Killing people, seeing my friends die in battles, never having a family, a future? Maybe you’ve grown up like this and don’t see it the way I do, but I’ve sort of had enough in these two weeks.”
Pain watched him cross his arms on his chest, unable to move from her spot, standing there frozen as her heart fluttered in her rib cage like a scared bird. What’s with the mood swings? Was it a part of the late Initiation, too?? – she couldn’t help but wonder as Chad continued, his words sending one last relentless chill through her veins,
“I have to say, I’m really grateful for everything that you’re doing for me, really. But I hate all this. I wouldn’t want this life of yours for all the money in the world,” he finished with finality in his voice and look, and Pain stepped away from him.
She dropped her gaze, taking a deep breath. She knew, knew it would happen, that it wouldn’t lead to anything good, and still she had let herself hope.
She turned away from the others and made a couple of steps toward the roof edge, trying to recollect her composure and thoughts. She didn’t succeed, really, and everyone was silent behind her, so she decided a good flight would clear her head better.
“Okay, we’re done here, let’s go home now,” she said, and Jane glanced at her with a worried frown. Her voice seemed awfully contorted to her.
“Okay…” She shrugged and followed her toward the edge.
Chad joined her without a word, and Dave trotted ahead to catch up with Pain as she walked alone, pulling her gloves on thoughtfully. When she was done, she paused and reached out her hand without looking at him. He took it with his eyebrows raised and felt his feet leave the roof surface as she lifted him off of it wearily and carried him forward into blackness. Maybe he was too drained from everything that had happened on the roof, or maybe he finally got used to flying with her, but this time he didn’t even feel anxious, seeing the city from the bird’s flight height.
Behind them, Chad paused on the edge, suddenly unsure. He could feel Jane pause behind him, too, and heard her voice, calm and confident,
“Come on, you can do it now.”
He was looking at the nightly New York below him, feeling the anxiety build inside, his natural instincts waking up at the sight of all this space between him and the ground. Somewhere far below another shiny Manhattan night was, buildings looming over the brightly lit streets, neon lights blazing, cars shooting back and forth. Down there it was noisy and overwhelming, he knew, but not for him and not this time. As he watched the streets below, his breath leveled, his anxiety dissipated, leaving behind only vague hesitation. He tried to feel any difference between him previous and present. Aside from feeling stronger than before, nothing really changed, and it still felt weird and scary to jump off such heights. So it was just something he had to do, like ripping off a band-aid. Quick and determined.
So he jumped. He dove down as if he were going into water, hands first. And immediately, the strong wind caught him, enveloping him in that warm flow, sending a buzz through his veins, rushing him forward, faster and faster. Elation filled his head, driving out all the worries, leaving him purely happy, like a child. And he didn’t mind, because there had to be some balance in good and bad that day, right? He laughed and felt a wave of warm air as Jane flew past him, smiling, daring him to catch up. Just a few seconds passed before they saw Pain and Dave ahead and darted after them, two elusive shadows over the sleeping city. And so the four of them vanished into the night, carrying with them the news that finally cleared up at least something.
Chapter 18
They were hovering high in the air, the sleeping Brooklyn outspread below them, and Pain’s face was a mask of disbelief. She had been like this for a minute now, her eyes focused on one single building far below, her hand gripping Dave’s palm like tongs as he stared up and tried to reach her with his voice.
“Pain? Do you hear me? Is that your building or not??” He shook her by the belt, but she didn’t even blink.
Jane beside her answered his question finally.
“Yes.” She gave him a serious look before turning to her sister. “I guess we shouldn’t be surprised.”
“I should have known better, should have headed here long ago…” Pain muttered and gritted her teeth in frustration. Dammit, dammit, dammit! She had so hoped that everything was still alright.
She had seen that something was off when they were still pretty far. It was the lights: the whole building was blazing in the night, not only the first floor, and her heart stuttered at that moment because there was no way now that the others were safe. She turned out right, after all – it was a war. Despite the exhaustion, she had rushed in the building’s direction like an angry bullet, and her dark suspicions were confirmed. People were darting to and fro around it, through the broken windows, open doors. Just when she thought it was all coming to an end, it had only just begun.
“Remember that evacuation plan they showed us? The one with the additional infirmary on the ground floor?” Jane didn’t have to finish her suggestion, because Pain had the same thoughts on her mind.
“Yes, they’re there. It’s enclosed, the best place for a hideout. I’m sure Peter’s there now,” her voice was flat and remote. She wasn’t sure, of course. She just couldn’t think of him lying somewhere with a hole in his chest.
“You think Beasts are still watching the tunnels?”
“No, I think they’re too busy destroying our quarters and killing our friends,” she muttered. “The fourth is the closes
t, let’s go!”
She began to descend, heading for some tunnel entrance, with Jane and Chad close behind her.
In five minutes they were already hurrying through the tunnels. Pain was striding in the lead like an infuriated panther in her ragged black coat, muttering something and making Chad behind her wonder if he had ever heard someone swear so exquisitely. He wasn’t sure what she was saying and wouldn’t risk asking. Actually, when she was in this mood, he would gladly use a cloak of invisibility, should he own one.
Five more minutes, and they were at a metal-covered door. Pain slammed her fist against it three times, stomping on the spot impatiently. It wasn’t even midnight on the clock, and the night was already rough. And now, considering that they were under attack, it couldn’t be called promising.
“Open the door, it’s Pain!” she shouted, and Chad couldn’t help but smile grimly at the irony of her words. They could hear the commotion on the other side and waited for one more minute, until Peter’s hoarse voice sounded from the inside.
“Open, open it!”
The lock clicked, echoing through the metal walls, and the door flew open, revealing a big, dark figure that loomed in the doorway.
Peter looked very different in gear. Chad would have never thought that some clothes and weapons might change someone that much. Now he looked collected and dangerous, like the tough and experienced warrior that he was. There were two heavy swords strapped at his waist, and blotches of blood covered his gear, but he looked unharmed. His face was concerned and exhausted, just like theirs, but his gaze lit up as he took in the picture before his eyes. He measured them from top to toe with his look, all melancholy and thoughtfulness gone for a change, and then seized the girls in a sweeping embrace.
“Thank God, you’re alive!” he exclaimed, lifting them both off the ground and setting them on their feet inside the room.
Sky Ghosts: All for One (Young Adult Urban Fantasy Adventure) (Sky Ghosts Series Book 1) Page 27
