by Noelle Adams
“A long time ago we were friends, practically family. You’ve always been one of the good guys and I guess it just took me a little while to remember that. But in my defense, it’s been twelve years since we’ve seen one another.” She paused, hoping he’d speak, but he didn’t. “Anyway, I’m sorry for…holding stuff against you that really wasn’t your fault.”
Again she waited and after a solid minute of silence she gave up. He must not be ready to forgive me, was her first thought, or maybe he truly was asleep. Lacey preferred to think that he was asleep because otherwise it meant that she’d really blown it here with Ean. Again.
“I’m sorry, Lacey,” he replied. “For everything.”
His words were spoken so softly and yet with such deep emotion and regret that Lacey felt tears well in her eyes. In that moment, she knew it wasn’t about the sheets or the bed or this cottage. It was about the past.
That one simple statement erased twelve years of battered ego.
“Ean?” she whispered.
“Hmmm?” Now he did turn slightly to look at her.
“I missed you too.”
Five
No words had ever sounded sweeter to Ean. He knew that Lacey had a stubborn streak; she always had, and to hear her admit that she had missed him, even after the way things had ended between them, made him smile.
“So we’re okay then?” he asked hesitantly and was relieved to see Lacey nod as she looked at him from the bed. “I’m glad, Lacey, I truly am. You have no idea how much it troubled me to think that I’d caused you any pain over the years.”
Lacey did not want to go down this particular trip on memory lane right now. “It’s no big deal, Ean. I was a kid. I’d rather just forget about it, okay?”
It was Ean’s turn to nod and he wished her a good night before turning to face the fire again. She couldn’t help herself, she watched him as he clearly tried to get comfortable and then felt a twinge of guilt. The bed really was big enough for the both of them without feeling too intimate and she was no longer that impulsive girl of fourteen; she was a grown woman who had mastered the art of self control over the years.
“Ean?”
“Hmmm?”
“Um…I was being ridiculous earlier. It’s crazy for you to sleep on the floor, especially since you hurt your back. There’s plenty of room here in the bed and like you said, we’re both adults and…”
She never got to finish. Ean threw off the blanket and kicked them away from the fire and was climbing in beside her in a flash of movement.
“Thank God,” he said as he pulled the blankets up to his chin and turned to face Lacey. “I mean, it was toasty in front of the fire, but my back was killing me.”
Oh, this was bad, she thought. Ean walking around the house or sitting on the ottoman or laying on the floor was one thing, Ean inches from her in the bed was quite another. All that bravado of moments ago seemed to vanish. All thoughts of self-control were slowly fading. What harm could admitting to a little attraction do?
They were face to face; the only sounds in the room were the crackling of the fire and their own breathing. Ean seemed to be memorizing her face, so intense was his expression as he looked at her. Lacey licked her lips unconsciously, willing him to close the distance between them and be the one to initiate a kiss. Her eyes felt heavy, slumberous, if she just leaned forward a little bit…
“Well, good night, Lace,” he said and turned his back on her.
That was it? Again? Oh, when was she going to learn? Why did it have to be this man who made her crazy? She flopped onto her back and stared at the ceiling, wondering what it was going to take to make her crazy crush on Ean Callahan go away! Wasn’t twelve years enough?
Turning on her side, facing away from him, Lacey stared in to the fire. The bed really was comfortable. The cottage itself was warm and cozy and if she could just forget about the man lying beside her all would be right with the world.
***
Everything was slightly blurry. She kept blinking to try and see what was going on around her but there was some sort of white haze blocking her view.
“It’s time, Lacey.”
Was that her dad’s voice?
Turning, she saw that it was her dad and he was dressed handsomely in his best suit and he was smiling at her with such tenderness that she wanted to cry. “Time? Time for what?” she asked.
“Don’t be silly, sweetheart. We don’t want to keep everyone waiting.”
Lacey was confused. Who was here and why were they waiting and why couldn’t she see clearly?
A door opened and she saw a room full of people. She couldn’t make out most of their faces, but she knew they were all smiling. Her father was holding her arm and then they were moving, slowly walking toward the front of the large room. That’s when she noticed Ava standing and smiling at her. Was this Ava’s wedding? No, Ava would be behind her if that was the case.
Panicked, Lacey looked down at herself and for the first time noticed that she was wearing white. It wasn’t a haze in front of her, it was a veil! She was getting married? What? To whom? She stopped and her father turned to look at her. “You’re absolutely beautiful, Lacey. Mom and I are so proud of you.” He prompted her slightly and they continued to walk to the front of the room. It hadn’t looked that large and yet they kept walking and walking and walking.
Finally she could see a man dressed in a black tuxedo ahead. His back was to her. Was this him? Was he the man she was marrying? Who was he? Before she could even give further thought to that question she was beside him. Her father turned her towards him and whispered, “Be happy, sweetheart,” before lifting her veil and kissing her on the cheek. She watched him walk towards her mother who was wiping a tear from her cheek. They joined hands and Lacey wondered what she was supposed to do now.
With no other choice she turned to face the man in the tuxedo and nearly collapsed to the ground when he turned to take her hand.
It was Ean.
***
Lacey woke with a start and tried to sit up, but there was a heavy weight keeping her pinned to the mattress. Her heart was racing and it took a moment for her to remember where she was.
“What the…?” she whispered, struggling to sit up.
“Are you okay?” a masculine voice whispered from behind her.
A masculine voice?
It was then that Lacey remembered that she was in bed with Ean. Only they were no longer sleeping on opposite sides of the bed with their backs to one another, they were sharing the center of the bed, spooned together. She pushed his arm off of her and finally sat up, frantically looking around the room for some sign that this was just a dream. The alarm clock next to the bed read 2:04.
Ean sat up beside her. “Lacey?”
She turned to look at him and shook her head to clear it. It was just a dream. She did not marry him; it was all just a dream. Clearly she had weddings on the brain because of Ava and her binder and the fact that they were at the cottage. It was all no big deal.
“Um…yes. I’m fine. I just had a bad dream and when I woke up I forgot where I was. Sorry that I woke you.” With that said she moved a little bit away from him and settled back on to her side of the bed.
Ean watched as Lacey turned her back on him and settled back down. She’d scared the hell out of him. With the blankets down around his waist and missing the heat of Lacey’s body beside him, he climbed out of the bed and walked over to the fireplace to put another couple of logs on to the fire. He shivered as the flames rose again and quickly got back in to the bed. “Cold out there,” he whispered and wished that she’d roll back over and help him warm back up.
In all honesty, he’d had no idea how they’d gotten so entangled in their sleep. Last he remembered, they’d been on opposite sides of the bed and he had no recollection of even moving, let alone to the center of the bed with Lacey. Luckily it seemed as if she had done the same; he’d have felt awful if they’d woken up and they were both on her side of the bed. She’d n
ever trust him again if that had been the case. Maybe by morning she’d forget that they’d slept spooned together for a couple of glorious hours.
Now he was wide awake and thinking about laying all tangled up with Lacey. He turned his head and looked toward her side of the bed. She had grown into such a beautiful woman. His heart lurched just thinking about her face. Lacey had always been pretty, that was never in doubt, but the woman lying beside him took his breath away. All those years ago she’d been a child; her kiss had shocked him and not only because she was only fourteen, but because he’d actually enjoyed it.
She’d told him that she’d loved him. He wasn’t foolish enough to take her seriously; after all, she was too young to understand what she was feeling. But right now, beside her in the dark, Ean found that he longed to hear her say it again. If she did, he knew that as a grown woman she’d be in full knowledge of what she felt and what she was saying and the thought of hearing it made him ache.
He’d never been the kind of man who looked for relationships or even felt comfortable in them. He was comfortable with his work, with his career. But with Lacey, a world of hope and possibilities came to mind. She knew him so well, he was comfortable around her and he was wildly attracted to her. Ean thought about how she’d drawn him in from two lanes over in the supermarket earlier and gave a mirthless chuckle. Yes, Lacey Quinn owned a part of his heart that he was just now realizing had always belonged to her and he had no idea what to do about it.
Quietly and as unobtrusively as possible, he moved towards her. Lacey’s breathing was slow and steady and Ean had no doubt that she was back to sleep. He was in the center of the bed on his back when she suddenly rolled over towards him. He waited, breath held, to see what she’d do next. Within minutes she was secured tightly at his side, their legs tangled together, her head on his shoulder, her hand on his heart.
The one that clearly belonged to her.
There were no more dreams to disturb Lacey’s sleep and when she finally awoke, the cabin was bathed in light. The sun was clearly up. She blinked the room into focus, but felt far too comfortable to move. The fire was still going in the fireplace and had kept the place warm and toasty all night long. She made to stretch and that’s when it hit her exactly why she had been so warm and toasty; she was practically lying on top of Ean!
Oh, dear lord, what had she done? Her subconscious must have gotten the best of her and that damn dream wreaked more havoc than it should have. Trying hard to move without waking him, she untangled her legs from his and was about to roll away when his grip tightened around her.
“Going somewhere?” he whispered sleepily, placing a soft kiss on top of her head.
Her heart actually melted. For so long she had dreamed of hearing him whisper such words to her and to be in his arms! “I didn’t think that you were awake,” she said honestly. She reared back slightly and looked at his handsome face. There was a light stubble on his chin and without conscious thought, she reached up and touched it. Scratchy, just as she’d thought. When she made to pull her hand away, Ean grabbed her wrist and held her steady. Slowly, his eyes never leaving hers, he placed a gently kiss on her palm.
Lacey’s heart began to pound frantically. What was happening here? Ean wasn’t attracted to her; he’d never been attracted to her. Was he even fully awake? “Ean?” she whispered when he released her wrist.
Everything happened in slow motion. He moved forward as Lacey rolled on to her back. Ean’s eyes continued to scan her face, committing it to memory. “You’re so beautiful, Lacey, do you know that?”
Unable to speak, she merely shook her head. Their connection was so deep so powerful that she couldn’t look away. “It’s true, you are, and you always have been. I look at you and you take my breath away.” No sooner were the words out of his mouth than he was leaning forward and placing his mouth on hers, testing the waters with a sweet kiss.
Sensations overwhelmed her as Lacey let herself sink into the kiss. Ean’s mouth was firm, but gentle; each touch of his lips was light and playful and when Lacey finally reached up and put her arms around him to pull Ean close, it took on a deeper feeling. Over and over his mouth slanted over hers and it was as if they had always been lovers. He knew her every desire even as he was discovering it for the first time.
Lacey’s hand wound up to tangle into Ean’s hair and held him to her and was rewarded with a growl of pleasure from him. It was madness; in her wildest dreams she’d never have thought that she’d wake in Ean’s arms and be kissed like she was essential to his survival.
Needing a moment to clear her head, she hesitantly drew back and was nearly overwhelmed with the look of raw desire on Ean’s face. Their breathing was ragged and her hands stayed busy – touching his hair, his face, his shoulders.
Her touch was killing Ean. He’d kept his hands to himself, not trusting that he’d be able to stay in control. One hand was behind the pillow Lacey’s head rested upon while the other was on top of the comforter near her hip. His skin tingled with the thought of actually touching her, being skin to skin. But if Ean knew anything it was that he didn’t want to rush this; after not seeing one another for so many years, this strong attraction came as somewhat of a shock. He always knew he’d see Lacey again and had been pretty confident that he’d still be attracted to her; it was the intensity of his attraction that scared him.
“How did this happen?” she whispered. “I thought that you weren’t attracted to me.”
Confusion marked Ean’s face. “Why would you think that?”
A giggle escaped her lips before she could stop it. “Are you serious? The last time we were like this you pretty much threw me out the door! That’s not the action of a man who’s attracted to a woman.”
Pulling back and sitting up, Ean looked down at her and let out a hearty laugh. “Sweetheart, we were never like this. The night of my graduation you were a child and I was a self-centered jerk who was only focused on getting out of town and being on my own.”
“I was almost fifteen,” she argued lightly and Ean reached over and finally allowed himself to touch her face.
“At the time, it wouldn’t have been appropriate for me to respond in any other way. I was eighteen; legally an adult. You were still technically a child; a beautiful one, yes, but still a child.”
The transformation in her face was amazing. Ean was able to see all of Lacey’s insecurities disappear. “You thought I was beautiful?” she asked shyly.
“Always.” He leaned forward and began to kiss her again. “If you had been older, I might have skipped that summer semester and stayed home.” He kissed her again, lingering. “I probably would have locked the basement door and kept you down there with me for the whole summer.”
And with that statement the past was forgotten and Lacey pulled Ean back to her and showed him all the ways that she would have entertained him that long ago summer.
Six
It was after lunch when they finally surfaced from the bed. Ean was placing more wood on the fire while Lacey reheated the leftover chili for them to have for lunch. “I think we may have to be adventurous and head down to the ranch,” she said as she placed the warm bowls on the table. “I didn’t plan on being here this long and we’re almost out of food.”
Lacey turned her back to reach for some silverware and let out a screech of surprise when Ean grabbed her around the waist. He spun her around and gave her a very thorough kiss before pulling back. “I’ll go down and bring some back. It may have stopped snowing but you still can’t maneuver in the snow in those boots.”
She rolled her eyes and playfully swatted him away. “Are we back to that argument? I can maneuver just fine in them. I wear them all winter long and while yes, it’s not in eighteen inches of snow, I still do okay.” Checking to make sure everything they needed was on the table, she nodded toward Ean to sit down.
“We’ll try it your way, Lace, but if you slip and fall in the snow, I’m leaving you there,” he teased. They laug
hed and dug into their lunch, hungry from the long night and their active morning in bed.
Lacey hated the thought of leaving the cottage, but knew that the real world was waiting for her beyond the front door. She had to find out when the plows were coming through, call the auto club and call into work because she had been due back later today. There was no way that that was going to happen but she had to at least check in – a fact that she shared with Ean.
“I’m sure the plows are already going strong, but we may need to make a call to get one up here. My dad used to have one here for the property, but I think he got rid of it a couple of years ago, said he was getting too old to do that for himself anymore. He’d rather pay someone.”
“I certainly don’t blame him one bit,” Lacey admitted, “although it would certainly come in handy right now so I could get my car out.”
“Anxious to leave?” he asked, his tone suddenly quiet, serious.
How could she possibly answer that? On one hand Lacey never wanted to leave. The real world was cold and lonely. What she’d experienced here in the cottage in the less than twenty four hours had made her realize just how lonely she’d been. On the other hand, however, everything had happened so fast that she wanted some time alone, away from Ean, to collect her thoughts.
With a smile of reassurance, Lacey reached across the table and took one of Ean’s hands in hers. “Not anxious, but I do have things that I need to get back to. Unlike you, I’m not the boss.” He smiled in return, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
It was in that moment that Ean realized the hurdles that were suddenly in front of them. They’d just shared an amazing morning together and hopefully another full night before Lacey had to go back to work, but what happened after that? His life was in Boston while hers was in Raleigh. Would she consider relocating? Could he even ask her to do that?
Not wanting to ruin the lighthearted mood they’d created, Ean pushed the negative thoughts aside and put a smile on his face as he kissed Lacey’s hand and they finished lunch.
“I can’t wait to talk to Ava and give her some ideas to tone the place down from her grand plan,” Lacey said as she put dishes away. “I mean, I get what she’s going for, but if we do everything she’s asked, it’s going to look like Christmas threw up in here.”
