No sooner had she met the staff than Harry was driving her to Buckingham Palace, where, on December 20, the extended royal family—all seventy of them—gathered for lunch. Though it is a family affair, it is still a royal family affair, and there is a hierarchy to follow of who bows to whom and who curtsies to whom. Meghan, for instance, had to curtsy to her future sister-in-law, the Duchess of Cambridge, and also to the Countess of Wessex, as Prince Edward was in the room. (Interestingly, if he had been absent she would not have had to flex her knees.) Diana’s brother, Charles Spencer, recalled that on one occasion there was so much bowing and curtsying, he ended up bowing to a bemedaled footman.
For a girl from California, where casual is king and the average American proudly bows to no man, this occasion must have been perplexing, not to say a little troubling. Here she was, a standard bearer for gender equality, curtsying to all and sundry. Of course, everyone was dying to meet the new arrival, so along with curtsying, it was a frenzy of handshaking and “How do you do” and “So pleased to meet you.”
When they were seated for lunch, Meghan found herself between her future father-in-law, Prince Charles, and Peter Phillips, an event organizer and the only son of the Princess Royal. They pulled crackers together, and Meghan put on a paper crown and joined the others reading out corny jokes as they tucked into turkey and all the trimmings.
A royal source was quoted as saying: “She was obviously a bit nervous at first, but she soon relaxed with Harry’s help as he introduced her to everyone and then she really enjoyed it.”
The lunch, however, is destined to be remembered for all the wrong reasons, as Meghan’s near neighbor, Princess Michael of Kent, who lives in apartment 10 in Kensington Palace, just across from Nottingham Cottage, arrived at Buckingham Palace sporting a blackamoor brooch, a piece of sixteenth-century Venetian jewelry that is now considered racist for its depiction of slaves. As Meghan is biracial and this was her first encounter with the wider royal family, Princess Michael’s decision was considered particularly offensive. The seventy-three-year-old princess apologized profusely and promised not to wear the brooch again.
“The brooch was a gift and has been worn many times before,” a representative for Princess Michael said in a statement. “Princess Michael is very sorry and distressed that it has caused offense.”
Princess Michael, whose husband is a cousin of the Queen and whose father was a member of Hitler’s Nazi Party, is no stranger to racial controversy. When she was at a New York restaurant in 2004, she had a run-in with a group of African American diners, reportedly telling them to “go back to the colonies.” In order to restore her reputation, she gave an extraordinary TV interview in which she described passing herself off as a “half caste African” in her youth to experience life among these “adorable special people” as she traveled around South Africa and Mozambique.
But Meghan had more to worry about than her new neighbor’s ill-advised behavior. Her beloved rescue dog Guy broke both his back legs in an accident. Though the beagle mix was on the mend after receiving treatment from TV “Supervet” Professor Noel Fitzpatrick at his Surrey clinic, it meant she left Guy behind to recuperate when, on Christmas Eve, she and Harry drove to Sandringham to spend Christmas with the royal family.
Though there were enough bedrooms in the majestic pile—Sandringham has 270 rooms—Meghan and Harry accepted William and Catherine’s invitation to stay with them at their newly renovated country home, Anmer Hall. It was more relaxed, the “Fab Four,” as they have now been dubbed, becoming closer with every passing day.
Though it was fresh and exciting for Meghan, Christmas at Sandringham has a regular soothing rhythm, like one of the many grandfather clocks that dominate the corridors. On Christmas Eve, following afternoon tea, the royal family open their presents, German style. Then it’s church on Christmas morning, to the main house for lunch, and then everyone watches the queen’s Christmas broadcast. Boxing Day, the day after Christmas, sees a pheasant shoot on the estate’s flat acres.
At four o’clock on Christmas Eve, all the family gathered in the wood-paneled drawing room for the queen’s favorite meal of the day, afternoon tea. Small sandwiches, home-baked scones, muffins, and cakes were on offer along with Earl Grey tea and the queen’s special Indian blend.
After a short rest, they all came together again in the white drawing room at six o’clock to open presents, which were laid out on cloth-covered trestle tables, with a name card marking each family member’s pile of goodies.
Princess Margaret’s ex-husband Lord Snowdon once described the scene as “total uproar” as everyone tore open their gifts. The royal adults don’t buy expensive presents but rather joke items or whimsical gifts. One year Harry gave the Queen a shower cap with the printed phrase “Ain’t life a bitch” on it. Another year he gave her a singing Big Mouth Billy Bass, which now has pride of place on the piano in her Balmoral study. In her day, Diana was once given a pair of false plastic bosoms while Princess Anne received a monogrammed doormat. One report suggested that Meghan got into the zany spirit, giving the Queen a singing hamster, which, apparently, the corgis eyed dolefully.
Once the merriment had subsided the family headed back to their bedrooms to dress for dinner—long dresses for the ladies, black tie for the men. At eight o’clock on the dot the family gather once more for pre-dinner drinks. The Queen arrives at 8:15 for her evening tipple, a dry martini.
The Duchess of York once recalled: “Christmas can be exhausting, not least because you sometimes change seven times in 24 hours. You never let the Queen beat you down for dinner, end of story—to come in any later would be unimaginably disrespectful.”
This Christmas Eve the banquet consisted of Norfolk shrimp, Sandringham estate lamb, and a pudding of tarte Tatin. During their starters, the family pulled another round of their bespoke crackers decorated with silver or gold crowns. Like everyone except the Queen, Meghan crowned herself with the paper hat.
On Christmas Day Meghan enjoyed a light breakfast with Harry, William, and Kate at Anmer Hall as George and Charlotte excitedly opened their presents.
Then it was over to the Big House for the walk to nearby St. Mary Magdalene Church. This year the Queen, age finally getting the better of her, arrived by car, accompanied by the Duchess of Cornwall.
Warned beforehand about the biting Norfolk winds, Meghan dressed stylishly but warmly in a Sentaler cream baby alpaca wool wrap coat, suede boots, and a brown beret-style hat. The three-thousand-strong crowd, some of whom had been waiting in the freezing conditions for hours, cheered as Meghan, Harry, William, and Catherine walked by. Meghan smiled, waved, and even playfully stuck her tongue out.
As luck would have it, the best photograph of the day was taken not by a professional cameraman but by single mother Karen Anvil, age thirty-nine, whose picture of the royal quartet easily paid for her own Christmas.
When they came out of church it was time for Meghan’s first public curtsy as the Queen walked back into her chauffeur-driven Bentley.
For the first time, Meghan looked visibly nervous, clinging to her fiancé’s arm as she dropped a wobbly bob, a rictus grin on her face. A smiling Kate—a seasoned veteran of such occasions—showed how it should be done, dropping the perfect relaxed curtsy.
Then it was time to thank those who had waited for so long. The most well-wishers could hope for was a handshake and a brief “Happy Christmas.”
Some, though, went further to win a moment in the royal sun. Among the crowd were a large number of Americans, some from a nearby US Air Force base. Student Michael Metz from Wisconsin used the occasion to propose to his Texan girlfriend Ashley Millican, the crowd cheering as Michael went down on one knee. When Harry and Meghan heard about their betrothal, they offered their congratulations. “It was amazing, like a fairy tale,” said Michael.
Back at the main house the royal family sat down for the traditional Christmas turkey and all the trimmings, the bountiful repast eaten within ninety minu
tes so that the family could watch the queen’s Christmas broadcast at three o’clock sharp. This year Meghan got an oblique shout-out when the Queen mentioned welcoming new arrivals into the family.
In the evening the television is turned off and the royal family plays traditional games such as charades. The Queen is an excellent mimic, particularly of political figures, including several American presidents whom she has met over the years.
On Boxing Day the royal men lead the guns out to the fields where hundreds of pheasants, specifically reared for this sport, are slaughtered. William and Harry love shooting—Princess Diana called her boys “the killer Wales”—and enjoy spending the day outdoors in field sports. Not this year. For the first time Harry left his guns in their cases. Perhaps he had already had his fill. He had been shooting in early December, flying to Germany for a weekend of boar hunting with a group of pals, the shooting party organized by German aristocrat Franz-Albrecht Oettingen-Spielberg, known as the Boar Terminator.
His absence from the fields of Sandringham was notable—and duly noted, the Sun tabloid pointing the finger of blame at his California fiancée. “Gun-der the thumb already?” they asked.
Vegetarian fashion guru Stella McCartney was in the running to make Meghan’s wedding dress—Meghan being a fan of her clothes anyway—which perhaps indicated the general direction of Meghan’s thinking.
At least Harry had another excuse. He had to be in London to prepare for his stint as the guest editor of the Today program, the flagship BBC morning radio show. He had been given a clear editorial palette, deciding to highlight causes close to his heart, notably youth violence, mental health, social media in society, the armed forces, conservation, and the Commonwealth. He had lined up a number of big hitters, including his father, Prince Charles, who called Harry “my darling boy” and discussed the “untold horrors” caused by climate change, and former American president Barack Obama, whom he had interviewed at the Invictus Games in September at the Fairmont Hotel in Toronto.
Before the interview began, a clearly relaxed Obama jokingly asked if he should speak with a British accent. He also wondered if he should speak faster than usual because he was a “slow speaker.”
The prince replied: “No, no not at all. But if you start using long pauses between the answers you’re probably going to get the face.”
When Obama asked to see “the face,” Prince Harry gave him a stern look. “I don’t want to see that face!” retorted a laughing Obama.
The conversation covered topics including Obama’s memories of the day he left office and his hopes for his post-presidential life, including his plans to focus on cultivating the next generation of leaders through the Obama Foundation. With an oblique swipe at the man who took his job, former President Obama said irresponsible use of social media was distorting the public’s understanding of complex issues.
In a quick-fire round of questions, he was asked which program he preferred, The Good Wife or Suits. The ex-president replied: “Suits, obviously.”
A whimsical piece in the Times caught the mood of the broadcast. “The man who was once naughty Harry, drunken Harry, Boujis Harry, has left behind the fleshpots. Now he is Saint Harry who spends his time toiling among the needy and making outreach radio in which he speaks to those others ignore. The injured. The depressed. The Prince of Wales.”
Fortunately, the Radio Four presenters had backed their way into a scoop: Harry’s engagement had been announced long after they had arranged for his stint as a guest editor. The news angle was the upcoming nuptials.
Boxer Anthony Joshua, who was interviewed by the prince, offered to be his best man, while presenter Sarah Montague quizzed Harry about Meghan’s first Christmas with “the Firm.” “It was fantastic, she really enjoyed it,” he said. “We had great fun staying with my brother and sister-in-law and running around with the kids. I think we’ve got one of the biggest families that I know of, and every family is complex as well. She has done an absolutely amazing job.”
So far, so endearing. As the interview wound down he remarked: “She’s getting in there, and I suppose it’s the family she’s never had.”
Cue foot in mouth. Prince Philip would be proud.
14
Invitation to a Wedding
Retired Army captain Prince Henry of Wales walked straight into a fusillade of criticism when he told the world that the Windsors were the family that Meghan Markle never had.
The Markles galloped straight into action, Meghan’s half sister Samantha leading the charge. “Actually she has a large family who were always with her and for her,” she thundered. “Our household was very normal, and when dad and Doria divorced, we all made it so it was like she had two houses.”
For once her brother, Tom Junior, who generally had little time for his elder sister, went into battle on her side.
“My father will be extremely hurt. He dedicated the majority of his time and everything to her. He made sure that she had what she needed to be successful and get to where she’s at today.” As far as the pundits were concerned Harry “dropped a clanger, a howler” by commenting on the family set up of his future in-laws. In his defense, he was basing his account on that presented to him by his fiancée. When she was growing up, she felt little sense of family—after all, her parents separated when she was only two. That was her truth, no matter what others believed.
Within days the plotting and in-fighting among the Markle clan suggested a heavily conflicted family. Samantha continued to tout her upcoming book called The Diary of Princess Pushy’s Sister but insisted that its title was intended to mock the tabloids and that she’s proud of her sister. She made a tearful television appearance to ask for Meghan’s forgiveness and speak of her hope that she would be invited to the wedding. There were stories that she was being paid by a TV company to sail to England—her medical condition makes flying difficult—to host a red-carpet event outside Windsor Castle. Then she hit back at suggestions that her retiring father would not be speaking at the wedding. “He should not be deprived of the right that fathers have to give a proud speech at the wedding. That’s not patriarchy that’s poetry.”
Meanwhile Samantha’s estranged brother, Tom, was finding all the media scrutiny difficult to bear. His girlfriend, Darlene, ended up in jail overnight after an overly boisterous, boozy New Year’s Eve celebration at their Oregon home, the second time since Meghan and Harry’s relationship went public that police made an arrest at his house. Previously he was arrested in January 2017 for the “unlawful use of a weapon and menacing.” The charges were dropped. Tom later suggested that a member of his own family had sold the story to the press. As he admitted: “All this attention has been really hard on the family.”
Finally, the man at the center of so much speculation, Meghan’s elusive father, Tom Markle Senior, was tracked down to his Mexican hideaway by an enterprising British tabloid reporter. Though he accepted a congratulatory bottle of champagne, the retired lighting director gave little in the way of illumination as to his plans. He said he was “pleased and delighted” with the news of his daughter’s engagement, later describing Harry as a “gentleman.”
The ghosts from Meghan’s past kept arriving to haunt her. A warring family was one thing, a former husband out for his pound of flesh was quite another. She was less than thrilled to learn that her ex-husband, Trevor Engelson, had sold a pilot comedy drama to Fox TV, which he was slated to produce, based on the idea of a recently divorced man whose wife has married into the royal family. The comedy conflict focuses on the estranged couple bickering over access to their children. He had the idea when he was discussing his checkered love life with fellow producer Dan Farah.
Whether or not the show is ever broadcast, Meghan will have to get used to being made fun of. She has already been introduced as a character in the no-holds-barred Channel Four comedy The Windsors. Comedian Kathryn Drysdale plays her as a relentless name-dropper, while Harry is so dumb he cannot even read. And speaking of d
umb, the US cable network Lifetime announced that it would release Harry and Meghan: The Royal Love Story just before the wedding. Their previous royal offering, titled William and Kate: The Movie, which they produced in 2011, was described by the Guardian newspaper as “toe-curlingly, teeth-furringly, pillow-bitingly ghastly.”
What was no laughing matter was the decision by Meghan’s lifelong friend Ninaki Priddy, who was her maid of honor at her first wedding, to sell her photograph albums and story to the highest bidder, receiving a six-figure sum for her memories. Given the longevity of their relationship, Meghan may have expected more loyalty. Unlike Priddy and other members of the Markle family, her mother remained a publicly silent but supportive presence, advising and discussing the details of the wedding with her daughter.
Indeed, Meghan and Harry had to tune out what she calls “the noise” and focus on the job at hand—organizing their wedding. Unlike her first marriage, which she left largely in the hands of a wedding organizer in Jamaica, Meghan wanted to control every detail, the big day reflecting what their spokesman described as the “fun, laughter and love” of their “fairy tale.”
The first item on the agenda was the guest list. It was going to prove trickier than either of them expected. The first indications were when Harry was asked if his friends Barack and Michelle Obama were getting a stiff white envelope. He was uncharacteristically evasive, saying that nothing had been decided.
The elephant careering around the royal chapel was Donald Trump. When he was a Republican candidate, Meghan had made her disdain for him perfectly clear, telling talk show host Larry Wilmore in May 2016 that she would stay in Canada if he were elected. Her then publicist Ken Sunshine is a senior figure in the Democratic Party, and she herself donated to the campaign toward electing Hillary Clinton as the first female president.
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