Adelaide sighed and slapped at the tousled and wrinkled bed covers. She needed to talk to Robert. Her heart wanted to make this right. She did not bother to powder her face or twirl her hair into tamed demure locks, instead she dressed in a plain dress, twisted her hair up and pinned it in a mass of golden tresses and wiped the tear stained trails from her cheeks before she left her suite and descended the stairs to find her husband.
“Good morning, Countess.” greeted Lissa.
“Good morning Lissa, is the Earl taking breakfast?”
“No Ma’am, I do believe he has been in his study the full morning.” She answered before rushing off to the kitchen to prepare Adelaide’s morning meal. A meal she was not interested in consuming in the slightest. Her slippers moved soundlessly over the floor boards while she crossed through the foyer and the visiting room to Robert’s study. She paused at the closed door and took a deep cleansing breath. A tapping on the door announced her presence.
Robert let the book he had been reading fall to the surface of the desk and stared at the solid door that separated him from the rest of the chateau. Someone was on the other side attempting to gain his attention. Had it been Thomas or a servant they would have announced themselves by now. He was close to being certain that the soft knocking belonged to Adelaide and he would now have to make a decision to face her or send her away. His fingers tapped out a rhythm on the desk as another knock met his ears.
“Come in.” he conceded.
A soft breeze swept in to the stuffiness of the study as the door opened. Adelaide stood in its frame waiting to be addressed. Robert gazed at her; there was a different air about her this morning. She looked tired, but honest. “Might I come sit with you?” she asked in a timid voice.
Robert stood up from his desk chair and indicated that she should come in and have a seat. He watched as she took the few steps that led her to the settee just inside, beside the door. He moved out from behind the desk and made his way over to the sideboard and a silver tray that boasted a round of crystal tumblers and a decanter of amber liquid. His fingers gripped at the cool surface of the stopper and pulled it free releasing the stinging scent of the drink inside. He could feel Adelaide’s eyes burning into the back of his head, though she said nothing. He hesitated only for a brief moment and then sunk the stopped back into the crystal neck of the bottle.
“If that is what you need to deal with me Robert than I shall not oppose it.” She offered from her seated position. Her tone was not accusatory, it was plain and to the point. “It is my fault that you have come to rely on it.”
Robert did not deny or confirm her statement. He moved back to his chair, sat down and closed the book before him with a creak of its bindings. He considered her words. She had given him reason to imbibe as often as he did, it was his solace since their falling out at the Grays this past summer, but what of his part prior to that moment in time?
“You are not fully to blame for this.” he squeaked out. The words were more difficult to speak then he had imagined.
“You are correct in that statement.” she said with assured confidence.
Robert raised his eyebrows to her.
“Robert, when we first began we were so very infatuated with one another. Do you recall?”
A smile crossed his lips, but he did not respond. He did remember it clearly. She had been insatiable and neither one of them could wait until they were properly joined as man and wife. They had stolen kisses and caresses, pulled one another into the privacy of secret rooms to bring touches of pleasure. He straightened his spine and drew his mouth back down into a firm line.
Adelaide continued. “It was a whirlwind courtship.”
Robert nodded.
“We were never truly lacking in that area. With Elisabeth it is different.” She had made a leap and it was evident that it had unnerved Robert. “Please let me explain.” She pleaded, feeling that he was about to shut her out once more.
His form relaxed and he leaned back in his chair giving her his full attention.
“I was never wanting for your affections. I had those in triplicate. What I needed,” she hesitated, “what I need is for you to hear me, to know me beyond my body, Robert. Elisabeth listens to me, we share, we talk, we laugh and sometimes we say nothing at all.” She hadn’t realized that she was speaking in a rushed pace. Adelaide drew in a breath and slowed her words. “She does not make me feel a fool for having dreams for myself.”
Robert’s mouth dropped open to protest, but he did not utter the words. She was correct and he knew it. He had been focused on his world, the world of his father and his father before him, where the women stood quietly beside them, proper and uninterested, keeping the house and the children. Adelaide was not like those types of women. He supposed that was another strong reason he had been attracted to her so suddenly.
“Do I make you feel foolish?” he asked instead of posing his protest.
Adelaide gave his question some thought. “Before, not often, but sometimes. Now you don’t. Robert these last few days have been wonderful. I have felt like perhaps there is a chance for us to get to know one another again. I had hoped that was the direction we were headed towards.”
His heart began to beat at a quicker pace. What was she saying? Did she want what he wanted? “Adel, if you want that then why did you go to the comfort of Elisabeth yesterday?”
She sighed, “You did not give me a chance to explain what you had seen, what had taken
Robert stood up and moved to her, sitting opposite her on the small piece of furniture. He
Adelaide proceeded to explain how she and Elisabeth were comfortable with one another, how being in the sewing room was practice now, it was done so often. She explained that the two had gotten caught up in the excitement of what they had created together and how happy they were for their friendship, but when what was once natural and unencumbered to them physically was now different, it was closed and less intriguing. She spoke of how they both felt it and that perhaps the phase had run its course, even though they both still cared deeply for one another it was no longer in an intimate fashion.
Robert sat silent and absorbed all her words, hanging on them for hope. “So now where do we stand?” he asked when she had finally rested her tongue.
Adelaide looked him straight in the face. “I think it is best to start at the beginning. Perhaps we need to learn one another, again in some areas and for the first time in others.”
He believed he could agree with this concept. “What of Elisabeth? If I am to be honest with you Adel, and I do hope that we are being so, I only wanted to give you happiness, but…” he paused and turned away fearing she would reject him if he said anything further.
Her finger’s reached for his face and turned his chin back to face her. “But what?”
“If you desire to continue your relationship with Elisabeth as lovers, I do not think I can participate in our relationship any longer. It is not an ultimatum understand, it is merely a fact of the matter. Do you understand that?”
Adelaide nodded. “I will not give up my friendship with Elisa, but I can be that, just friends.”
Robert beamed.
She took his hands and kissed each one in turn. “Understand that I will discuss this with her, but also know that I do so very much desire this to work for us husband.”
It was his turn to nod and kiss her hands. His lips worked from her fingertips to her mouth were they lingered with renewed passion.
* * *
Chapter 24
It had taken all morning to clean and pack up the sewing room. Now that the collection was complete Elisabeth felt it was time to move her work back to the House of Camille, full time. All Adelaide’s gowns had been removed and delivered to her own personal suite. Elisabeth had hulled out the scrap fabric and folded them neatly into a trunk, the remaining yardages were rolled up onto bolts, notions were stored away and everything was set into a pile by the door to be carried down to a coach and take
n to the shop for the girls to unpack. The room was now restored back to its original design as a sitting room. Elisabeth gazed over it, reminiscing over the multiple memories that had occurred within the confines of its walls.
She gathered up several books that she and Adelaide had read together in the evenings and proceeded to bring them back downstairs to the library. It was somber occasion. Elisabeth felt as if a chapter in her life had been abruptly ended. Her spirits were low and weighted with all that had occurred in the last week’s time. It had been a ride of ups and down with multiple bumps. Perhaps now that she would be spending more time at the shop she would be able to breathe, she felt like she hadn’t been able to take a full breath in a long time.
The door to the library was wide open and she proceeded in, lost in her own thoughts. When she saw a flash over movement, she jumped, yelped and dropped a few of the volumes in her arms onto the floor with a loud thud. “Ouch.” Her exclamation ended with a low grumble as she collected the books and stood back up. When stood back up, arms full, her eyes adjusted and she saw Thomas standing like a statue by the window, a book open and perched in his fingertips. She jumped again when he snapped the cover shut, and small particles of dust swirled around in the sunlight wafting out from its pages. His eyes were like daggers as he glared at her. She held her ground at the door, neither one of them saying a word.
Thomas mad a move to leave the room and she blocked the door with her feminine frame. He could have easily moved her, grasped her upper arms and lifted her away if he wanted to. He probably did want to, she thought as she tried to make her stature taller and broader than in appearance than it was. Thomas dodged to one side and she matched his motion, it was a crazy dance in the doorway, he ducked she swayed, he stepped she dodged. They knew each other’s move and anticipated them in unison, a matched set.
With frozen form his eyes pleaded with her, the hurt still all too fresh and evident in his stare.
“Thomas we cannot continue on this way.”
He opened his mouth and she braced herself for a harsh reprimand. “What would make you assume that there is anything between us to continue?”
Elisabeth wished he had shoved her aside. His words were harsh and they ripped at her spirits, tearing her apart more than she already was. “Thomas if you would only allow me to speak to you.”
She watched the line of his jaw set and tighten. He was a stubborn man. She now understood why he was as successful as he was, he was unbending and she assumed that in business this was an asset for him, but for her it made the task at hand that much more difficult to proceed with.
“Thomas, I know it is difficult for you to understand, I hardly understand it all myself. I can’t even say how it began.”
He scoffed, “Perhaps the shedding of clothing may be a clue.”
His sarcasm fueled her pain and it took all her effort not to turn away in tears and leave him be as he wished, The fact that she needed him to understand, needed him to know she felt different now, that is what pushed her forward.
“I am not speaking of last evening. I am referring to the relationship of myself and Adelaide. If you would please stop being a horse’s backside and listen you can then decide for yourself with all the given information and not what your imagination has whittled up.”
Thomas’ eyes grew big and he was stunned by her brash reprimand. He kept his position but his muscles relaxed noticeably. Elisabeth took this as an indication that he was at least willing to listen, if only for a moment. She knew her time was limited,
“I have never cared for anyone in one in the way I care for Adelaide. The only person I had in my life before her was my grandmother. It was not our intentions to become as close or involved as we did. It seemed a natural sequence of events.”
Thomas raised his eyebrows.
“It did feel that way, Thomas. You may not believe this but before Adelaide,” she hesitated and looked down at her feet with a heated blush spreading over her cheeks and throat, “and then you I have never…” again her words were stuck in her mouth.
“Never what; never kissed, never touched, never became intimate? I find that hard to believe after what I have experienced.”
Her dark eyes blazed as she glared at him, throwing her shoulders back and standing tall to defend herself. She could deal with him thinking she was involved with Adelaide, although they were both certain that neither one of them wanted that aspect any longer, but for him to question her honesty and virtue; that was something she was not willing to let lie.
“I have never done any of those things with anyone before the two of you.” she huffed. “I never wanted to. It was not my intention to have to ever rely on a husband and his finances. I had always intended to make my own way, take care of myself and not have to attend to a man and his household. It did not occur to me that it might happen, you did not occur to me Thomas, until these past few months. With Adelaide I did not have to worry about giving up anything. Adelaide did not want anything from me, except my friendship, which I willing gave her. Last night nothing took place, it was an ending, an understanding for both of us. Adelaide wants to try again with her Robert, and I know that is what Robert wants. Why would I have helped him choose her necklace if I wanted to ruin their marriage?”
“You helped Robert?” His words were soft now.
Elisabeth nodded.
“It was a beautiful choice.”
“Thank you.” He was distracting her from her point. “Thomas, nothing happened, Adelaide and I are friends, that is it.”
She watched his facial features go from doubting to considering and then back to stone. “Elisabeth, how can you know that you won’t pursue that relationship? It has been evident for months. She moved you in here. You spend endless hours with one another. How can you say it is over? I just do not believe it.”
“If you can only stand with me a while longer, Thomas. I am learning something new with you, something I did not know I wanted before now.” Elisabeth reached for his arm, she felt a need to comfort him.
“Do not touch me, Elisabeth.” He raised his hands in defense and stepped away, backing up into the room s if her touch would infect him with some illness she carried on her fingertips.
“Thomas?” She was grief stricken and the tears had begun to fall.
“I apologize Elisabeth, but I cannot be any part of this.” He pushed past her and exited the chateau with a slamming of the heavy front doors.
Elisabeth fell against the support of the library door frame needing support. She could not go to Adelaide. She could not flee to the suite that Adel had given her. She had nowhere to go except back to the House of Camille.
Thomas had not returned by the time the coach arrived for the trunks and bags of materials to go back to the shop. Elisabeth had stiffed her belongings into her own carpetbag and joined the driver on the front bench, behind the horses. She returned to the House of Camille and there she stayed.
* * *
Chapter 25
“I apologize, Elisabeth, but I cannot be any part of this.” The words kept repeating in Elisabeth’s head that morning. It was one of those gloomy London mornings today, as if to match with the mood around the House of Camille. Elisabeth was supervising some of the last minute work that were being put on the dresses that she had finalized for the couture event that Adelaide had so graciously volunteered to host at their Chateau.
“Not that one, Sally! I told you I want the cream colored trimming to go with the brownish tone of this dress. Why don’t you girls ever listen to what I am saying?” Elisabeth shouted out in frustration.
“Sorry, Madam. I’ll get that one.” Sally said meekly as Leona looked at her, scared seeing Elisabeth’s mood this morning.
Elisabeth could not get Thomas out of her head no matter how much she immersed herself in her work. She ran her fingers through the satin dress that was lying in front of her absentmindedly as Sally sprinted across the room looking for the piece of trimming.
�
�I kept it on one of the drawers. Fetch it from there, Leona.” She motioned towards the work table with her hands as Sally looked on crest fallen.
“It’s not here, Madam.” Leona said in a hush tone.
Elisabeth got up from where she was seated and started going through all the drawers. She threw out laces in a fit from the drawers trying to find the trimming that she wanted. She went around to the back of the shop to see if was in one of the drawers there but she did not find them there either. She knew that she had all the items that were required for the dresses in the shop itself and there was no way that any of those things were at her home. So, the only place left where she might have misplaced the trimming was the Chateau of the Lovelace’s. She must have misplaced it when she was arranging the things that were to be taken back to the shop form the chateau.
It was just before leaving that Elisabeth and Adelaide finally got some time to speak. Adelaide was really happy with her relationship with Robert.
“I am so happy to be back with Robert again. I think we are genuinely making some significant progress in our relationship.” Adelaide’s face was beaming with happiness and there was a twinkle in her eyes. Elisabeth was familiar with the look on her face. She had seen it often enough when they were intimate.
“I know Adel. I can see it in your face. It makes me so happy to see you happy. Robert is a good man and there is no doubt about that. And when he came to me to ask for my help in selecting that necklace, I really felt that he was trying to be there for you emotionally.” Elisabeth said as she ran her fingers through Adelaide’s hair as she placed her head on the top of her bosom.
Elisabeth remembered all the good times that they had spent in this room. They had explored their sexuality here. Elisabeth found so many things about herself in this room with Adelaide.
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