by Magee, Jamie
Remembering the past perfectly, tonight his arm fell around me as I laid my head on his shoulder.
I found myself fascinated by his hand, how it controlled this beast with such minimal effort. I reached for it, wondering if the steering wheel hummed with the vibration the car sent through me.
“I never did teach you to drive, did I?” he said as he glanced down at me.
I moved away from his embrace, clearly stating that was not what I was asking to learn.
“What?” he asked with a bit of a laugh in his velvet tone.
I just shook my head no as I slid back to my side. When I got there and glanced back to him, he was gone, but the car was still soaring down the road. I heard him belt out laughter and found him in the back seat. “You better take the wheel, Glory. Don’t hurt this magnificent beast.”
“Vade, you get up here this instant!” I bellowed as I feverishly tried to figure out what to do. On instinct, I moved into the driver’s seat, thinking that if I turned the key it would stop.
“There you go, take the wheel,” he said just over my shoulder.
“Vade, I can’t reach the pedals.”
“I got them. Steer,” he said as he failed to hide the humor in his voice.
One glance down told me that that was true. The pedal that I thought gave the car power was against the floor.
Steer. I can do that. I’m a freaking sovereign, for Creator’s sake. I’ve got this.
With shaking hands, I gripped the wheel and felt the vibration of the car soar through my being. I ever so slightly turned the wheel, and the car weaved from the straight line it was on.
“Not sure I’d go that way. Trees, Glory; trees would hurt her.” The calm humor in his voice was so addictive.
Her. He always called it a ‘her,’ but there was nothing feminine about his car. I managed to move the car between the lines he’d left her in before.
Just as I relaxed and convinced myself that he had control of this, that he would not let me hurt this car, I felt the heat of his skin next to my neck. “I should have done this long ago,” he murmured. I knew that tone; it was one of his more sensual ones, one that he would have not dared use with me the first time I rode in this beast. I glanced to his eyes in the mirror before me and felt my soul pulse, the scent of roses flutter through the car. “Eyes on the road,” he playfully ordered as his humming fingertips outlined the strap on my shoulder.
Before I could glance back to my path, I saw lights behind us, lots of lights; blue, red, white, and an horrid sound was coming from them, one that gave me an awful sinking feeling in my core.
“Vade!”
“Yes?” he said, as if he could not see those other cars chasing us.
“What do they want?”
“For you to slow down, I’m sure.”
Before he finished his sentence, I’d slid down in the seat and pressed the pedal that I knew stopped the beast. But we did not stop; instead, the car spun wildly.
Laughing, he shouted, “Oh, Glory, you have caused them angst.” The car finally stopped with a violent jerk. I soon figured out that it was now facing those lights that were chasing us. On instinct, I braced my arms across my face.
Then all at once, the horrid sound ended and I felt a fading warmth on my arms. Slowly, I let them down to see a sand dune in front of me. He had moved us, car and all, more than likely to an entirely differently side of the dimension we were in, maybe even a new one.
“Did you wipe their memory? Make sure they didn’t crash into themselves?” I said with a deep sigh.
“Drinking coffee and eating donuts whilst wondering why nothing exciting ever happens in their town,” Vade said from behind me.
I leaned back in the seat and stared into the mirror at the reflection of his deep grey eyes, the shards of light that pierced through them. He was now comfortable in the massive back seat, one arm behind his head as his long legs were relaxed in a wide stance.
This was another first, one that led to an epic first.
Seeing a sun that was not clouded with smog was something that the timid girl I was had never been afforded. Seeing one melt into the ocean was a gasp-eliciting experience. I didn’t understand where it went, why the water didn’t steam with the heat of it as it fell into distant waves. Vade had showed me thousands of them, stating that no one sunset was like another, which was very true.
I gripped the steering wheel. Before us was an approaching storm, behind us a blissful sunset. It was kind of poetic, placing me between two points that have and will occur as I stood between the memories of the girl I was and what I, or rather we, had become. So much had changed, yet even more had stayed the same. I still had questions and wonders that I kept from him. That timid girl had never perished.
Right now I felt ashamed; Silas’ conversation was echoing in my thoughts, how he dared me to say that word, how he accused me of feeling it for Vade.
When this all began, the other kings were kind in their own way to me. They would take me to The Realm and let me witness what emotions their line washed away. Very early on whilst with Xavier in The Realm, he questioned me about Vade. He knew that Vade was with the Creator when I was raised and wanted to know why. I had no answer for that. Xavier also knew that for some time Vade and I had been stepping out on our little adventures, that Vade was waltzing me through an endless sea of firsts. Xavier asked me how serious we were about each other.
Still new to this lifestyle, I did not know all the rules, so I came very close to saying the ‘L’ word, to confessing my blooming emotions for Vade to Xavier. I had no reason to believe that he was a foe; at that time, we were all loyal sovereigns. Just as the word came out, his hand cupped my mouth and he earnestly told me that I could never feel that if I wanted to remain here. He told me why, too: that we had to rise above that so we could complete our charge and not infect the masses.
I remember not understanding why the Creator had not told me that, why if that emotion were deadly to us that He had left that rule unspoken. I can still feel my heartache. I had planned to tell Vade that day how I felt. I knew we’d find our way to this beach. I planned not only to say that word to him but also kiss him for the first time, because though I could see the desire in his eyes, he had left that barrier up. I thought if I told him and made that move, he would know that he was breaking through to that shy girl I was.
According to Xavier, I would have died in his arms if I’d said it. I knew that would have been more than painful for Vade. That advice, I am thankful to Xavier for; he stopped me, and because he had, Vade and I had spent countless cycles of eternity at each other’s side. Of course, thanks to Xavier we had spent almost one apart, but I suppose that is beside the point now.
“Another first,” I said under my breath as I let go of the wheel and turned in my seat.
Vade let a ghost of a smile come to the corners of his lips.
“How do I turn her around?”
He moved his head from side to side as he reached for me. I climbed over the seat and onto his lap, resting my legs on each side of him as I leaned my back against the front seat.
“Why not? You can’t see it from there?” I said quietly as I gazed at the setting sun through the back window.
“It is not as beautiful as you.”
I blushed as I tried to hide a smile. We were in yet another poetic moment. He was forcing me to face the innocence I once was, the beauty of it, why he faced the storm clouds closing in around me.
Vade reached to caress a strand of my hair that the wind had blown across my face behind my ear.
“Do you remember what I asked you right before one of our sacred firsts happened?” he asked tenderly.
That girl I was rushed to the surface, and you would have thought that no time had passed. The sight of him still sent a hum of adrenaline through my veins. I still had to tell my voice not to tremble. “You asked me what I was feeling.”
There was a pain in his eyes, one that was there when this happen
ed the first time. I didn’t understand it any more now than before. “What are you feeling right now?” he said as his hands fell to my legs and slowly caressed the flesh that was there.
“More than I can say,” I said with a sigh. His humming touch could, no, would never get old, become common.
“Try,” he urged gently. I could swear his eyes were glassing over, but I convinced myself that was only the light of his rush; the aroma of roses filling the car was telling me I was right.
My eyes fell from his. He didn’t know what he was asking me to do, that the girl I was and the woman I had become wanted to tell him he was more than a rush, and if I did, this turmoil we were entangled in would not matter because I would perish in his arms.
I remember Xavier telling me that my essence would shatter and become a part of The Realm. I halfway wondered why he didn’t use that word to end me last time. Surely if he had, I never would have found my way to the Veil. Xavier should have forced me to speak my emotions back then. Even though I was furious at Vade, I still would have said it. Now, Xavier was going to wish he had because no matter how temporary my reprieve from the Reaper’s watch was, I was going to ensure that I struck that king.
I had to move my thoughts away from that emotion, that word. I had to figure out how to show Vade how much I adored him.
I placed my hands on his, something I never would have done when this happened before. I slid them forward on my thighs as I leaned in and very timidly tilted my head, inviting him to kiss me.
Over the course of time, we had held each other countless ways, tenderly to aggressively, each time finding a new experience that would never be forgotten. Yet now at this moment, the comfort we had found with each other’s vessels had vanished. It was as if neither of us had ever been touched.
Vade’s hands left my legs and reached to cradle my face. He held my gaze, not letting his lips reach mine. “This is not words, Glory,” he said under his breath as his gorgeous eyes slowly eased across my image.
“The sacrifice I would face for saying them would be worth the relief of telling you…but I swear to you that you would disagree. You would never let me utter them if you knew them.”
“I should be given the chance to disagree. To know the words I see in your eyes.”
I began to tremble in his lap. He could not seriously know what I wanted to say about how I felt, for if he did he would never let me say the words. He would never let me perish. We were the last fragments of what true Escorts were.
“Glory…I have not always given you that chance. I have not always made you feel safe enough to say anything you wish without judgment or ridicule.”
I nodded once, wanting to pull away so I could hide my tears, but his hold did not falter; instead, he caught them as they fell and wiped them away.
I drew in a jagged breath. “If you cannot feel them, then they matter not.”
“But I do—” I stopped him short. I knew he was going to tell me that I was his rush, that he felt a burning fever for me, but if he did I would be putty in his hands and unwillingly say the word that was my final death sentence.
Instead, I all but slammed my lips against his and forced them open so I could feel the warmth of his tongue and taste the sensation of mint. At first he nearly fought me as his warrior body tensed, but my kiss weakened him and his body relaxed as he pulled me forward on his lap and the warmth of our bodies were melded against each other.
I could hear heavy raindrops hitting the car, hear the rumble of thunder in the distance. I ignored it all. My kiss would dance between the two people I was. The bashful girl let her lips tremble, her soul pulse as innocently as it did the first time I kissed him; the sovereign, the woman that had held him countless times, pressed my legs against his sides and let my hands roam across his powerful chest.
When the rain began to pour into the windows, Vade moved us and manifested our souls far from this point.
Chapter Twelve
I expected a bed, somewhere beautiful and sensual. I expected the bed we had shared countless times, but that was not what I found.
My legs were still around him, my lips were against his, but he slowly let me fall as his kiss left my lips. I could still smell and hear the rain, but the salt of the ocean was gone.
We were standing in front of one of the most wonderful places in existence, at least in my opinion. It was bakery-slash-coffee shop and bar. Inside, the essence of every single dessert known to man was wafting along with the warm aroma of coffee in the air, and hopefully there was a soulful singer on the modest stage.
Escorts do not need food to survive like humans. Oddly, though, humans rarely consume food for nourishment alone. It’s the taste, the emotions within the taste, and the company with them whilst they divulge in these sensations that attract them to the pleasures of food.
Bread—hard, old, dry bread—and water were the only tastes I had known before Vade. So this first that we were now standing before was one of our more humorous and romantic ones.
My eyes grew sad. Instantly, he questioned them with that protective glare of his. “What happened?” he asked, softly lifting my chin so I would have to look at him.
I pulled away as I leaned against the brick wall behind me and stared at the raindrops that were falling just outside of the awning we were under.
“This feels like goodbye,” I said under my breath.
“Goodbye?” he gasped.
My eyes met his. “Yeah, goodbye. You are walking me through some of the most precious moments in my existence. You could only be doing that if you wanted to live them once more before I truly vanished from this existence.”
“No, Glory, no,” he said as his hand reached for my waist and pulled me against him. “I’ve thought of these moments constantly since you left. This is a celebration for me. This is me swearing to you that we are everything that we were when we first lived through these moments, and so much more.”
“These are the moments you thought of?” I asked in a shameful tone.
“What did you think of?” he asked curiously.
“The end.”
“The fight?” he questioned as his body tensed. “That is how you remembered me?”
Inside, I was kicking myself. It was a natural habit of mine to see the wrong in everything. “Yeah, every day. Every single day. I thought at first that you would still avenge me, still come for me, but the more I thought of that fight, the more time that passed, I understood that was the last fight.”
“That was not our last fight,” he said so quietly that I barely heard him. It shocked me because I assumed he would say something along the lines of we would never fight again. But he was too honest of a man to say such things.
He held my stare as he spoke and moved forward, pinning my body between his and the brick wall behind me. “You can’t always think of the bad things in life. You can’t dwell on them because then you will learn to expect them.”
“Will learn? I have learned. I don’t understand you sometimes. You are the King of Anger. You should have thought of it, too. Used that emotion to bring your wrath.”
“I am the King of Anger, which means I understand the emotion, that I know it is what we use it for, either a gift or a dagger. That fight crossed my mind, and when it did I was angry at myself for not being more clear, for not choosing my words differently.”
“Be clear now. Tell me why you waited so long. Why you waited until you had no choice but to come for me. Why did you shelve me like all of your other material things?”
“I didn’t shelve you.” His eyes reflected the appall that I made him feel. “I didn’t wait until I had no other choice.”
“Mazing was told that the Veil was thinned, that now any of the other kings or their line could reach The Fall with little effort and that you had to move me so I would not be found.”
“Mazing,” he said under his breath.
I clenched his arms. I knew he thought Mazing had the same issue I had, that we only he
ard what we wanted to, and that was very little because wrath perpetually consumed us.
“Listen. That Veil did not thin overnight. It has been thinning for quite some time. That is not what changed why I found words.”
“Then what?”
He took in a deep breath and turned his head to the street before he looked back down at me. “I lived in the past. I rebuilt it. Everything they took from you. Even though the Creator had made me a promise before I met you and also on the day you left, I still lived in the past, thinking that using my anger that way was best. I was wrong.”
Vade hesitated as he stared at me. “Sometimes we forget to heed our own advice. I stopped listening. I stopped looking for signs because I was in the past. One day, I felt weak. I felt like death and had no idea why. I knew you were still safe, so I went to the springs. My line was intact, strong and thriving. Those of yours that I’d found were strong. I didn’t understand. I fell to the floor, and for the first time in a long time I listened. Really listened. The first thoughts I heard, the first words were of that green-eyed girl of yours. I heard her declare that she would protect and stand up for a pure Escort. It took my breath away because there was so much of your wrath within her.
“I listened more intently, turned the springs back to understand who she was, why she was here, who the ones with her were. I discovered instantly why I was weak. That Donalt, along with Xavier, had not only stolen your Fated and mine, but also had nearly killed one of them.
“I didn’t even have to think about it. I restored my Fated that they had harmed, along with yours. I watched over them until they left The Realm and then looked through the past, discovered how wronged we really were. It was worse than I had ever imagined. I wanted to show them to you, wanted you to see their paths, and for the millionth time I tried to speak the order to bring you home, only this time the words came without fail.”
