“Always trying to save people,” the big man behind us rumbled, “Gets you into nothing but trouble and it always will.”
“Who are you people?” I finally asked.
The man propped his pole by the door and peeked out through the cracks in the wood. “Name’s Trent. We’re Suicidals just like you. Obviously.”
“Is this the first time for you?” Kevin asked, “First time in the Farm?”
I felt something twist inside of me, “No…I know what this place is.”
Trent joined us by the fire, towering over me. “Good. Hate having to explain eternity to new folks.”
Kevin sighed, “We just have to make the most of it, Trent. We’ve done good for a while now.”
Trent snorted, “Good…ain’t no fucking good here, Kev.”
Kevin turned to me, ignoring the negativity. “What’s your name? How long have you been here?”
“Nick…I’m Nick.”
Kevin slapped me on the back, startling me. “Glad you’re with us, Nick.”
Trent went towards the back of the shack, rummaging around on a table I hadn’t seen before, his voice carrying over his shoulder. “Swear to God. You the most cheerful fucking emo kid I’ve ever met.”
“How long have you been cooped up here?” I asked, clearing my throat.
Kevin shrugged, “I don’t know, man. Times kinda screwy here. We’ve been here a while, though. No one really makes it this far out so we don’t see many Pig Born. Or Suicidals for that matter.”
“Got lucky getting dropped here,” Trent said, turning back to us and holding something out for me. “Most of us get dropped on the other side of the forest closer to The Pig and that big-ass barn.”
I took what he was holding and examined it in my hands. It looked like the squishy brown brick Megan had offered me in the woods.
“Eat it, man, first one is free,” Trent said tossing another square to Kevin. “You stick around and I’ll show you how to make these. Bout the only edible thing we’ve been able to cook up.”
“Thanks,” I said taking a bite, realizing just how hungry I was.
Trent nodded and took a seat on the floor, resting his head against the wall. “So what’s your story, chief? How long you been here?”
I followed his example and sat against the opposite wall, now cramming the food in my mouth. I swallowed and sighed.
“Not long. But long enough to see how horrible it is.”
Kevin took a seat next to Trent, crossing his legs out in front of him. I almost laughed. Three people just sitting around a campfire, swapping stories. I ran a hand over my eyes, exhaling.
“How bad was it? When you died again?” Kevin asked.
I met his gaze with dead eyes. “Muck got me.”
Trent let out a low whistle, “Shit, man…”
The recent horrors began to wash over me and I wrapped my arms around myself, “Look, I don’t want to talk about it.”
Kevin nodded understandingly. “Of course, dude, we won’t press any further. I’m real sorry about that though. Trent and I have been fortunate enough to not encounter Muck…but we’ve heard stories.”
I shifted uncomfortably. “What about you two? What’s your story?”
Trent snorted, “Why’s it matter? We’re all here now…ain’t no fucking way about it.”
Kevin just stared straight ahead, a far off look on his face. I let the seconds drag out, becoming more comfortable in the silence than exchanging stories of personal suffering. I began to clean the blade of my ax with my shirt, listening to the crack of the fire.
Kevin broke the silence, his voice soft, “I killed myself over a girl…seems so stupid now…”
Trent shot him a look, an eyebrow cocked like this was the first time he was hearing about this. I looked up from the ax and saw Kevin fiddling and staring at the floor.
“I had a crush on her since freshman year. Her name was Amanda. Didn’t really talk to her much though. She was popular, pretty, hung out with the jocks…you know the type. But something about her just captured me in a way I had never felt before. I was a pretty angry kid, held a lot of hate in my heart.”
He looked up at us and I saw he was struggling. “My dad used to beat the shit out of me. My mom let him do it. It kind of tainted my outlook on things. Everything I did seemed to emit a violent reaction from him. I started wearing eyeliner and shit to school so people wouldn’t see my black eyes, my bruises. Grew my hair out. I did anything I could to hide what was happening at home. It was embarrassing. I didn’t know anyone else who had abusive parents and so I started to think there was something wrong with me.”
Kevin’s voice began to shake, “And then I saw Amanda. She was like an angel. I fell in love with her from a distance. It’s stupid I know, but I couldn’t help it. Everything about her was perfect. The way she smiled, the way she laughed, the way she’d toss her hair. Hell, even the way she sneezed was cute. I could feel something happening to me the more I paid attention to her. It blocked out all the shit I was dealing with back home. It made things easier. I knew that no matter how bad it got, I’d get to see her the next day. I wanted to talk to her, let her get to know me. Who knows, right? Maybe she’d feel the same way.”
The shack was dead quiet as Kevin continued, his voice strained and growing weak.
“Well, finally one day I got up the courage to talk to her. It was at lunch and she was surrounded by her friends, but I didn’t care. It had gotten to the point where I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I walked right up to her and asked her out. And you know what she did?”
I stared at the kid, shaking my head slowly.
A tear escaped down Kevin’s cheek, “She didn’t even acknowledge me. She didn’t look at me, didn’t respond, nothing. All her friends were laughing while I stood there shaking. I couldn’t believe it.
She was the only thing keeping me going at that point. After that day I had nothing to hold onto. Nothing. Everything else in my life was misery. She was my one hope for happiness. And as it turns out, I wasn’t even worth of a response. Do you know what that’s fucking like man? To be in love with someone and have them not even acknowledge your existence?”
Kevin’s hands were balled into fists, his face stained with sadness, his voice a harsh whisper, “It fucking hurts, man. It fucking hurts.”
Trent and I made eye contact and then turned away. Neither of us knew what to say. We were all here for a reason. Something in our lives had pushed us into this hell. And yeah…Kevin was right…it did hurt.
Trent reached out and patted Kevin’s shoulder, “Take it easy, chief.”
Kevin wiped his eyes with his sleeve, forcing a laugh, “I’m sorry, guys. Jesus, look at me.”
“Don’t sweat it,” I said softly.
Kevin shot me a smile, “I’ve just never told anyone that before. Feels good to get it out, you know?”
I watched the fire dance before me, “Sure, kid…I get it.”
In the distance, something screamed.
I ignored it.
7
We sat for a while, listening to the rain and thunder have its way outside. I got lost in the constant drumming against the fragile shelter, the droning splatter of rain mixing with the steady crackle of the fire. My mind wandered and I hugged my knees to my chest, eyes glazed over and trained on the dancing ribbons of flame.
After some time, Kevin finally spoke up.
“So, Nick…what’s the plan?”
I pulled myself out of a semi-trance and ran the back of my hand across my face. “What do you mean?”
Kevin poked at the dying fire with his shoe. “Where are you headed? What are you going to do now that you’ve been reborn?”
I sighed, tension leaving my body in a rush. “I don’t know, man…I’m looking for someone, but all my leads have dried up.”
“Who are you looking for?” Trent asked.
I pulled the ax into my lap. “My girlfriend, Jess. She came here with me.”
Kevin furrowed his brow, “Jess…Jess…”
“She’s out there somewhere,” I muttered. “I know she is. I met someone who thought she’d be in Muck’s cave, but she wasn’t.”
Trent cocked an eyebrow at Kevin. “Wasn’t that girl we ran into named Jess? The blond girl who was looking for someone? Remember? In the woods?”
Kevin snapped his fingers. “Oh yeah! I knew I recognized that name!”
I sat upright, gripping the ax. “Was she about my age?!”
Trent nodded. “Yeah, and short. Thin too. Looked scared as hell. Said she was looking for someone.”
I stood up, heart racing. “Was she ok? Which way did she go!?”
Kevin and Trent exchanged wary looks before Trent continued, “Look man…we were only with her for a little bit, before…before…” He looked to Kevin for support.
Kevin shook his head, eyes on the fire. “They got her man. I’m sorry.”
“Who!?” I practically shrieked.
“They call themselves The Hooves of the Pig. Crazy radical religious cult that has a temple by the mountain. They worship The Pig and all it does. They’re a bunch of whacked out Suicidals; been around for a long time now. It’s an all-male society. They capture women and use them during ‘prayer’. I’m sorry, man. There was nothing we could do. They were having some kind of procession through the forest when we ran into them. As soon as they saw her, they sprang on us. They slugged Trent pretty good and shit…I’m no fighter. They dragged her off to their church.”
I sat down hard, my breath leaving me. My mind was spinning, the influx of information overwhelming me. I was conflicted between joy and horror, oil and water mixing in my gut and churning nausea like butter.
Jess. She was out there. I was right. She had stayed and was looking for me. My heart ached at the thought of it, of her scrambling through this nightmare all alone. But who were these people, these crazy pig worshipers? What did they want with her? Were they hurting her? I felt my hands tighten along the length of the ax.
I remembered my time with Megan when she had first found me. We had seen some kind of procession through the woods, a gaggle of hooded figures chanting as they marched. They had to be part of this group, these Suicidals who called themselves The Hooves of the Pig.
“What are they going to do with her?” I asked, feeling my blood begin to boil.
Trent looked at me apologetically. “Look chief, these people are fucked in the head.”
My voice grated like iron. “Tell. Me.”
Trent sighed, “Shit, man…they take women and make them breed with Pig Born. They think it’s the closest humanity will get to mirroring The Pig in all his fucking evilness. Most of the children die at birth, along with the mothers, but a few have survived. They keep them at their temple, treat them like royalty. If I had to guess, I’d say your girlfriend was taken to breed.”
I felt my throat turn dry. “Jesus Christ…”
“They’re insane,” Kevin said softly. “There’s nothing we could have done. I’m really sorry, man.”
I turned to him, “Well…there’s something I can do.” I felt a deep rage stir in my chest like a forgotten ember stirred by a summer wind.
I swung the ax over my shoulder, voice a rumbling growl. “I’m going to get my girlfriend back and hurt anyone who gets in my way.”
Trent held up his hands, “Whoa, whoa, hold up, man. You’d be walking to your death. There’s way too many of them. They’d slaughter you before you even made it to the front gates of their temple.”
I jabbed a finger at him, “If you think for a second that I’m going to leave her there, you got another thing coming. Now get out of my way.”
Kevin stood by Trent’s side, concern riddled across his face. “Nick, please, there are smarter ways to do this.”
I gritted my teeth, that ember glowing in my chest. “They could be raping her right now. Every second I wait is another second she has to suffer.”
Trent put a hand on my shoulder and gazed intently at me. “Look chief, I get it. You’re hurting right now. You want to go out there and let that anger loose. But cool the fire for just a second and listen to me. There’s another way to get in there.”
“I’m listening.”
“Approach them like you want to join them,” Trent said. “They accept recruits all the time.”
I looked at Kevin. “Will that work?”
He shrugged, “I don’t know, dude. I’ve never tried. But it’s a way better plan than going in swinging. I don’t know how many exactly there are…but I know there’s enough of them that they’d stop you before you could save her.”
I chewed on my lip, torn. Every ounce of me was ignited with a desire to kick the door down and start chopping. But behind the raging emotion, I knew it was a stupid idea. They were right. I’d be cut down in seconds. I had no idea what I was walking into, where they were keeping Jess, or how many there were. I exhaled, frustrated.
“Fine…where exactly is their temple?”
Trent patted my shoulder, “Good man. I still don’t encourage this, but I’m glad you’re not charging in crazy. Start walking towards the mountain, back toward the Needle Fields. I’m assuming you’re familiar with that area?”
I nodded grimly.
“Ok,” he continued, “just stay on this side of the forest with the mountain in front of you. Can’t miss the place. It’s big.”
I looked at both of them, gaze lingering on each of their faces. “All right…thank you. I guess I’ll go then.”
Kevin held up a hand before I could leave. “Hold on, dude. One more thing.” He shot a look at Trent who nodded.
“What is it?” I asked.
Kevin looked hard at me, “If you can get her and make it back here, we’ll be waiting. Trent and I have been building a raft. We’re going to try and get past the Keepers. We’re going to try and escape this place. We have room for two more.”
I took a step back. “What? Are you serious?”
Trent crossed his arms. “Dead serious. No one knows what’s out there. No one knows what lies beyond the ocean if anything. And so we’re going to find out. We’ve been working on this raft for a long time now. That’s why we’re here in this busted ass town. Finding materials isn’t easy, but we’ve made a lot of progress.” He saw my disbelieving look and snorted. “Hey, it beats the hell outta waiting around for something to kill you.”
“You’ll never make it past the Keepers,” I said, “And when they DO catch you, you’ll swing from their crosses forever. You really think it’s worth risking that?”
Kevin planted his feet. “We have to try. There’s a reason those Keepers are guarding the water. Did you ever think of that?”
I shook my head. “No…actually I didn’t.”
“Exactly,” Trent exclaimed, “which is why we’re going to find out. So if you actually manage to get your girl, then come back here and hook up with Kevin and I. We won’t wait forever, though. Ok?”
I turned it over in my mind and then nodded. “Ok. Ok, we will. Thank you, both of you. I really appreciate this. I should probably get going now, yeah?”
Trent slapped my shoulder. “Hey, good luck to you, chief. I hope you find what you’re looking for.”
Kevin held out his hand and I shook it. “Best of luck to you, dude. We’ll be waiting.”
I shifted the ax across my shoulder and dipped my head to both of them before going to the door and throwing it open.
Rain darkened my hair and pulled it down to hang across my eyes as I marched out onto the soggy earth. My boots squished in the mud and a cold wind slapped across my face. My shirt was soaked in seconds, the fabric rippling and clawing away from my body. I squinted through the downpour, trying to cut through the gloom. The gray obscured my view of the mountain and so I started walking from memory.
I prayed nothing was stalking me, the steady drum of rain covering any sound of monstrosities sneaking up on me. I passed through the shanty town with e
ase, slinking from corner to corner until I was past the frayed construction. Ahead of me lay miles of open land, rolling foothills, and dead grass as far as the eye could see. I knew behind the veil of water the temple waited under the shadow of the mountain.
I hefted the ax in my hand, the wood slick. How exactly did I plan to do this? What if these religious freaks didn’t let me join their ranks? What if they turned me away? I set my jaw, my resolve turning to stone. There was no way I would let them. I didn’t care what I had to say or do, I was getting inside. And then I could start looking for Jess.
I summoned her face in my mind and held onto it. Where was she right now? Was she safe? I imagined her lost in the woods before Trent and Kevin found her. She must have been so scared. How long had she been looking for me before she was taken? How long did I have? Or was it already too late? Was she already suffering at the hands of these people?
I didn’t want to think about it but forced myself to stay centered on that. It fueled me, a spark on my heels as I trudged through the dreary landscape. Every bruise on her body, every cry from her lips…in some way I was responsible for that. I needed to make it right, needed to rip her out of this cycle of fear and hopelessness.
I don’t know how long I walked. At some point, my lungs began to burn and my legs quivered from exertion, but I pressed on through the storm. Ever so slowly, the peak of the mountain began to grow on the horizon, pushing through the sheets of rain to stare down at me.
Up above, the slimy trails of red ooze fluttered in the wind, dangling from the crescent cuts in the clouds. I watched one of the ooze trails, slightly off to my right. As I marched, I saw a body fill the gelatinous tube and slowly slide towards the tear-drop exit. It looked like a man my age.
When he reached the end, he slipped through the crimson substance and tumbled to the earth. I traced his descent, wondering whether it was someone new or merely a reborn Suicidal. He landed about two hundreds yards ahead of me, his body disappearing behind a timid foothill.
The Black Farm Page 9
