by CORY CYR
“Okay, I concede, and I appreciate the gesture,” I commented, bending to kiss her.
“Coffee and toothpaste. Yum,” she announced. “Shouldn’t you go before you’re late?”
I opened the door and scouted outside. “Roads look clear, and the sun’s shining. This weekend, I think we should car shop for you. You need your own vehicle instead of that rental, which must be costing a fortune. We’ll get something made for this terrain so Kathy doesn’t have to pick you up on snow days while I’m in school. You can be independent and go shopping,” I jested.
“You goofball. Kathy knows. I already had a conversation with her about us. Don’t worry. She doesn’t plan to snitch on anyone, especially to your mother and father. And about car shopping, can we go to the Mercedes dealership? Wait, do you even have one in Fairbanks?”
I coughed as I closed the front door. “What the fuck, Gabe? Fairbanks isn’t Bumfuck, Egypt. We have running water and electricity, too. And before you set your sights on a Mercedes, I think a truck or SUV would serve you better. I mean weather wise.”
“But I miss my C-300,” she whined.
I shook my head. “You need something practical that works well with snow tires. It’s only for three years, minus three months.” I snorted. “It’s important to get a safe vehicle made to handle the Alaska weather. We’ll find something you like. I promise.”
Gabe stood with her arms crossed. “You’re such a nerd,” she exclaimed.
I stood my ground. “Why, because I want you safe?” She had no idea that I was born while my mom was in a coma resulting from a car accident.
“There are many reasons, but I think of you as a hot-as-hell nerd. Sometimes it’s your mannerisms, the words you use, and your dress, but you’re still gorgeous and fuck like a Trojan.”
I blushed with embarrassment. “I’m speechless, especially the Trojan part.”
“Never mind, we’ll practice that part after dinner and your studying. I really have to teach you the art of the quickie. I’m horny,” she confessed.
My cock coiled into the metal buttons of my jeans, bent at an odd angle. “I better get going. I’ll hold you to fucking tonight,” I said as I held my books in front of my pants.
She appeared pleased as she closed the door behind me. I wished I’d had enough time to have sex, but I doubted I’d ever be the man who took the act of sex casually. I enjoyed savoring the moment, especially with her. Because I loved her, I suddenly lived for Gabe. Did that emotion take years to cultivate? Was this infatuation because I’d had my first taste of sex? My dad had warned me that could happen. Was she married? Did she have a boyfriend? When I found out what she was hiding, would I “un-love” her?
These feelings were not fabricated. My heart pounded when I thought of Gabe. I was in deep, choked by a flurry of emotions. There was no doubt losing her would scar me deeply. The pain would be so intense I wasn’t sure I’d recover. I loathed having someone so important in my life that I couldn’t live without her. Sure, I felt that way about my dog and my family. But now there was a woman that consumed my everything.
Walking into my first class, I sighed loudly. I had three tests, so the time flew. I got to Protected Paws thirty minutes early and changed into a shirt, tie, and lab coat. Then I stuck my head into an exam room to let Gabe know I was there.
“Hey, Riley, could you listen to MiMi’s heart?” she asked, referring to a small pit bull.
I pressed my stethoscope to the dog’s chest, listening for a few minutes. “We need to do a blood test. Her lungs and heart have all the indications of heartworms, but examining the blood will let us know for sure.”
“Thank you, Dr. Michaels.” Gabe winked. “He’s kind of the expert on pitties, as you must know,” she said, assuring the dog’s owner.
I had three dog examinations and one cat. An oral surgeon and anesthesiologist had come in to do several teeth cleanings. The dogs would stay for a day or two to make sure the procedure had no side effects. We were all finished before six, and Gabe and I got ready for dinner.
“Make sure you take off that dreaded tie,” she ordered as her hands loosened it. “The white shirt, too.”
“Are you trying to have your way with me?” I asked as I unbuttoned the shirt.
“I like that sweater. Wear that. And having my way with you comes after dinner,” she said with a sensual smile.
“You look beautiful,” I remarked, salivating over the blue knit dress and boots she’d changed into. “Won’t you be cold?”
“You’re going to keep me warm,” she said, retrieving her heavy coat from the closet.
We walked past the front desk. “You kids have fun,” Kathy announced, smiling nervously.
I nodded in response, placing my hand on the small of Gabe’s back.
As we arrived at the restaurant, I could see through the window that Marnie was working. I quietly groaned. “Let’s make sure we don’t sit in her section,” I mentioned as I helped Gabe out of the car.
“Okay, be honest. I know you didn’t have sex, but something happened. What was it?” she asked suspiciously.
“I was at a party with Kai last year after I’d broken up with my girlfriend, and I suppose I was feeling lonely, so she gave me a blowjob,” I admitted.
Gabe chuckled as she took my hand. “I knew it had to be physical. No one acts like that unless they’ve touched you or want to be touched by you. Tell me the truth… Me sucking your cock was better.”
I choked on air as we entered the restaurant. “Jesus, Gabe, you’re going to give me a hard-on.”
And once again, we were sat in Marnie’s section. I was convinced at this point that the other waitresses knew. Great. Though, this time wasn’t like last time. Gabe sat extremely close to me, and I had one arm draped around her. She kissed my cheek as she squeezed my free hand.
Marnie walked over with menus and glasses of water, scrutinizing the situation. “Hey, Riley, how’s it going? You growing a beard?” she asked, setting everything on the table.
“It’s going I guess, Marnie. No, I’m not growing a beard. Just got bored with shaving.” I squeezed Gabe’s shoulder. “You met my girlfriend Gabriella,” I commented nonchalantly.
Marnie looked shocked, then irritated. “I know you said something last time, but… I heard from Kai… um… that she was only a roommate.”
“I guess shit changed. Anyway, I suppose we’ll have the crab cakes with slaw and fries and a white wine for my girl,” I prattled as I handed her back the menus.
Marnie stalked away unhappily.
“Damn, Riley, you didn’t have to be so specific. That wasn’t very nice. It’s obvious she has feelings for you. Don’t be a typical male asshole.” She moved away from me. “You just showed me a side of you that I didn’t realize you had. I’m just surprised.”
Frustrated, I swept my hand through my hair. “I’m not going to marry her because she gave me a hummer. Jesus. If I’m overly nice, she’ll expect something.”
“Maybe be a little respectful. And take her emotions into consideration.” Gabe’s eyes were alight with annoyance. “So now we have a label? Girlfriend.”
“I thought we were together.”
Softening, she grazed my cheek with her hand. “We are. But I warned you about labels. You did that not for our benefit, but to hurt her.”
Gabe was right. I boasted about our relationship to make sure Marnie knew she didn’t have a chance. I wielded the label, using it as a weapon.
“I’m sorry,” I said with remorse. “I wanted to let her know I had someone else. Yeah, I was bragging, but even if we weren’t together, I wouldn’t be interested in Marnie.”
“I apologize for getting so worked up. I keep forgetting all this is new for you. I mean the sex and love part,” she commented.
I turned to face her. “I could use that as an excuse, but in reality, I was being a douche. I’ve had many girlfriends, but never loved any, so maybe the way I feel is clouding my judgment. Maybe I’m in this by myself. A
m I in love alone?”
“You know deep down that’s not true. But I’m not able to commit like you are because I have a dark past, one I can’t talk about.”
It hurt my heart that whatever Gabe was concealing, she felt as though it would tear us apart. That I would no longer love her. Actually, it scared the shit out of me. I remembered hearing bits and pieces about my mom not being divorced yet when she got with my dad. When he found out, the knowledge nearly tore them apart. I wasn’t that strong. My world would crumble. I would roll into a ball and die. I’d given this woman the power to destroy me, and I wasn’t sure I liked it.
We ate quietly, though I barely tasted my food.
As we walked into the house, my cell phone buzzed. Regardless of wanting to ignore it, I had to answer.
“Hey, Dad,” I said as I shrugged off my coat. I nodded at Gabe as I walked upstairs. “How’s sunny Florida?”
“What’s going on, Riley? I’ve called numerous times. You understand that your mom is ready to get on a plane because she thinks you’re dead.”
I chuckled as I sat on the bed. “Good grief. I’m an adult. Do I have to jump every time you call?”
“Are you kidding me? Hell yes, you need to answer. We need to know you’re safe. I’d hate to call the police to do a welfare check.” My dad sounded pissed. “What is going on? I mean, I know you have school and the clinic, but what else is happening? How’s the new doctor working out? Are you good with my choice?”
Should I mention Gabe? It was apparent my dad hadn’t known he was a she.
“I’m in love,” I blurted out, not even second-guessing the decision to tell him.
My dad was silent for a minute, then sighed into the phone. “We’ve only been gone a few months. So who is she, son?”
I certainly did not intend to tell him it was the new doctor. “I’d rather keep us private. I don’t want to jinx it.”
“You know you can tell me anything and it will remain between us men.”
I blew out a breath. “Honestly, Dad, I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I get it. Just don’t put yourself in a position to get hurt. We haven’t been gone that long. Don’t rush into anything, and always use protection.”
Too late, Dad. Besides, she’s on birth control. “Dad, please… I’m always careful. Trust me. And please don’t tell Mom. She’d freak.”
My dad snorted. “You’re right about your mom. My lips are sealed. Enough about your love life. Talk to me about Dr. Tobin.”
I hated lying. “It’s working out. You picked a good one. Our clientele seems to like the new doctor.”
My dad cleared his throat. “I spoke to Kathy,” he announced.
My face heated. If he already knew about the mix-up, why ask? “So you know you hired a woman instead of a man. She’s fine.”
“Oh, son, please tell me she’s not the one. You’re much too young for that kind of involvement. I know what you’re going to say, but your mom and I… that was different. I’d had quite a bit of experience before I committed to her. Besides, she was always my endgame. I knew I’d love her forever.”
“You know what? I’m able to make my own decisions. You left me in charge. I’m not going to discuss my personal life with you.”
“Just know I’m here for you, son, no matter what. Promise me you’ll tread carefully.”
I wiped a hand down my face. “I have to go, Dad. I need to study.”
“I love you, Riley.”
“I know,” I responded as I disconnected.
He knew. Now my aunt would know everything because he promised not to tell my mom, and he would have to talk to someone. Who better than his sister, or worse, my sister?
There was a knock at my door before Gabe slipped in. “Was that your father?” she asked as she sat on the edge of the bed.
I nodded, setting down my phone. “I think Kathy let the cat out of the bag.”
“What?” she ranted. “Exactly what does he know? Is my job in jeopardy?” Her tone reflected angst.
I wrapped my arms around her. “No. He only knows he didn’t hire a man. He knows you’re a woman.”
“That’s all?”
How do I tell her he knows? But does he really, or is he guessing? It isn’t really lying if I don’t tell her everything we discussed.
“Riley,” she uttered.
“Don’t worry. He doesn’t know about us.” I hated not telling her that my dad suspected. The only reason he would know anything is it’s what he would have done.
I’d spent so much effort trying not to be him, yet I’d still become him. I was Shea Michaels’s son. I’d just lied to the woman I claimed to love.
I wondered if he was as mental as I was at twenty. Gabe never said the words; she only claimed to care. Was I setting myself up for despair? Still, my dad really couldn’t give me grief about my choices since he’d done the same and much more.
Gabe looked shaken.
“Please don’t let that phone call freak you out,” I begged as I pulled her on the bed.
“How can I not be concerned? Your father hired me as a professional. It must be shocking to find out I’m having sex with his son.”
I began unzipping her dress as I scooted closer. “You think I told him anything, that I gave him specifics? Not a chance. Now, can we forget the stupid phone call? I don’t want to think about my dad when I’m trying to have sex with you.”
I tugged off the rest of her apparel, licking my lips as I stood to kick off my pants. She got off the bed and began to shrug out of her bra before I stopped her.
“No, leave it on. I like it. It’s sexy,” I quipped as I snapped one of the straps. I bent to kiss her as I pushed her hair behind one ear. She stood before me in a black satin bra and panties. I kneeled and nuzzled the material that covered her pussy. “God, you smell good,” I croaked as I fingered the damp piece of cloth between her legs. I grasped both sides and slid them off.
“Riley,” Gabe sobbed, dragging her hands through my hair. “I need you right now.”
I stood and tugged off my sweater while she pulled my briefs down, her hands drifting across my cock. She dabbed the glistening drops of precum on my swollen slit and coated her lips as though she were applying lip-gloss. I wanted her so badly I could hardly think.
“I love you,” I whispered as I laid her on the bed, brushing her core with my hand and sighing at the wetness. She coaxed me on top of her, and I let out a groan as I entered her slowly, sliding my length against her labia. I picked up the pace, rocking against her, creating friction between us as I ground my mouth against her neck. It suddenly occurred to me that we were making love, not fucking. Would she be satisfied with this?
She held my hips as I pushed deeper. I reached beside me and laced my fingers through hers. Our eyes pierced each other as I began pumping faster. My balls slapped against her ass, and I bit my bottom lip.
“I really need to come.” I gasped as my brows furrowed and my legs began to tingle. “Kiss me,” I said as she arched.
Gabe’s body clenched, and she began gyrating against me. My skin burned as I thrust rapidly, my orgasm slamming into her so strong it knocked the air out of me, and I almost blacked out.
My stroke decreased, and I finally withdrew. I blanketed her with my arms, our flesh endowed with goose bumps and the aroma of sex. Pushing damp hair from her forehead, I kissed her roughly, forcing my tongue between her teeth. She attempted to back off as I grew more dominant with my mouth, deepening the kiss, compelling her to stay in place.
Gabe finally pushed away, breathing rapidly. “What the hell, Riley? I have to breathe. Why are you spoiling the moment?” she hissed as she sat up.
“I’m sorry. I’m not sure what got into me. I’m acting psycho, maybe because I can’t control my emotions. I loathe feeling undisciplined and confused. I’ve never experienced these kinds of feelings.”
She appeared uneasy. “I know, and it makes me apprehensive because all I can offer is that I
care for you.”
Christ, I was being penalized for all the girls who’d expressed their love for me and I played it off. Now I knew how they felt. God was punishing me for all the hearts I’d broken, especially Megan. “Okay, I’ll keep those three words to myself.” I promised.
Her hands slid over my abs. “Riley, I can’t give more. I’m sure you wouldn’t want me to say it if I didn’t mean it. You should never equate sex with love.”
I felt disappointed, jumping out of bed. Gabe attempted to pull me back, but I shook her off.
I grabbed some sweats, then walked into the bathroom. “I need to study,” I yelled through the closed door.
I heard the rustling of clothes and the bedroom door slam, letting me know she’d left. Gabe was turning me into a subservient, dick-less man. So convinced of my eventual heartache, I was actually pushing us toward it. I was totally acting like an immature prick. But if the fucking wasn’t anything to her but sex with no strings, then I’d have to adhere to her wishes.
I could feel my heart squeezing as I pulled on a thermal shirt. I clutched my chest because it physically hurt. I knew from experience that you couldn’t force someone to love you. Many girls had tried, and now this was my well-deserved hell.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Riley
F or fifteen days, we were like two ships passing in the night. My theory was she waited until I left for school before she came out of her room. I saw her at the clinic, but little was said unless it pertained to work.
Kathy noticed the discord between us. “I couldn’t lie to Shea. He’s my boss. Riley, I only told him about Gabriella, not about you and her. I would never do that. I feel as though I’m the cause of you two not speaking.” She fretted.
I handed her a stack of files. “The phone call from my dad didn’t help, but it’s not the cause of the rift between us,” I confessed sadly.
Kathy placed the files on her desk. “If you ever want to talk, I promise whatever you say will stay between us. I would never break your confidence.”
“I appreciate it, but I don’t think talking about it will help. The ball’s in her court now. No one ever said love would be easy. Case in point, my mom and dad.”
