Dhak paces back and forth, a deep furrow between his brows. I watch him, gratitude filling me that of all the people in the Universe, I ended up stuck here with him.
“Thank you,” I say.
He pauses in his pacing. Frowns. “For what? We’re still stuck here.”
“I know,” I say. “But… Thank you for coming for me all the same. Thank you for carrying me when I couldn’t walk. Thank you for believing me about… about Mark.”
“For believing you?” Dhak says. His eyes hold a mixture of softness and anger, and somehow I know the softness is for me. The anger belongs to someone else.
I shrug. “I know nothing really happened. I shouldn’t need…”
“Charlie,” Dhak cuts me off, crouching down beside me. “It doesn’t matter that nothing really happened. It matters that you believed he would hurt you.”
“And you believe it, too,” I say. “You said he should be in prison. You don’t even know him. You barely know me. But you believe me about him.”
“Why wouldn’t I?” he says, so full of confusion. I want to kiss him. Not on his cheek this time, but full on the mouth. For being so earnest. So kind.
And I remember, weeks after the wedding, when I finally got the courage to tell Mother about what happened. I wanted her to respond like Dhak is doing now. But she didn’t.
“I don’t know,” I say. “It doesn’t matter. I just… thank you. For everything.”
He nods, takes my hand in his. Squeezes it.
Then he lets go, rising to his feet. He grabs something off his belt. It’s a tube of some sort, and he threads his arms through the bars of the gate, holding whatever it is out away from him.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“It’s a flare,” he says. “Emergency use only - they’re as like to attract your enemies as they are your friends. But I think we’ve got a greater chance of attracting friends.”
He does something to the flare, and all of a sudden it’s burning extremely bright. Then light fires out of the end of it, overpowering the brightness of the sun for a brief moment. It fires out of the end of the tunnel and into the desert. We’re still angled up a little, so I hope it got to a reasonable height in the sky, that someone saw it.
It’s maybe an hour later when I hear a familiar sound. I raise my head from where it was resting on Dhak’s shoulder and look in the direction of the gate.
“Was that… barking?” I say.
A moment later, I hear it again, more distinct this time, and definitely a bark. I crawl over to the gate, pressing my face to the bars and shielding my eyes with my hand as I try to see out into the harsh brightness.
Then Ness is lolling over to me, all excitement as he bounces around, licking my face again. I’m laughing at his antics and because I’ve never been so glad to see something in my life. I stroke his fur, and when he rolls onto his back, I oblige him with belly rubs, tell him he’s a good boy.
“Do all your rescue party get this treatment?”
I look up into Jaxran’s grinning face.
“If that’s what it takes to get us out of here,” I say, and his grin widens.
“Did I mention I like her?” Jax says to Dhak, and though the visor over his face means I can’t see his eyes, I get the impression he would be winking at me.
There’s an edge of growl in Dhak’s voice when he responds. “Her majesty is injured and needs a medic. Perhaps you could unlock this gate?”
My heart sinks at the reminder of my lie. I should just tell him. Just blurt it out and apologise. Maybe he’ll even find it funny. He didn’t call me ridiculous when I said I was afraid of the Commander. He’d looked at me like he understood. So he’ll understand that I’ve been lying to him all this time.
After he risked his life to save you? the devil on my shoulder says.
I back away from the gate as Jaxran bends down to examine the lock. Ness gambols about, getting under Jaxran’s feet and generally making a nuisance of himself. It would be funny, but my brain is just looping round the same thoughts over and over again.
Would Dhak have come after me if he knew I was nobody?
Will he honour his responsibility to get me home if I tell him the truth?
And I’m a coward. An awful, terrible coward.
But I don’t want to find out.
Jaxran has a transport not far away. Once he’s got the gate open, we head towards it. I try to walk, but the shifting sands prove too much for my ankle, and Dhak is forced to carry me again. He chats with Jaxran about what we’ve seen in the mountains, while I continue to question everything.
If I told him the truth now, would he even carry me as far as the transport? Or would I be abandoned here to make my own way?
He’s not cruel, I tell myself, but my brain is stuck in this spiral.
You’re useless, Charlie Warren.
Good for nothing.
I’ve got to clean up the mess you made today.
You make me so mad and I just snap.
Would Dhak snap? I don’t think he would, but I didn’t think Jason would either. I still don’t know that Jason would, I remind myself. My judge of character hasn’t been proved to be terrible.
Only, it feels like it has.
“Charlie?”
I’m being set down in a comfortable seat, cool air brushing over my skin.
“Charlie, are you okay? You’ve gone very pale.”
Clawing my way back to that voice feels like a herculean effort.
“Dhak?” I say, my voice weak. I’m close to tears.
Pathetic.
Useless.
“What’s wrong with her?” Jaxran’s voice.
“Abbarax toxin,” Dhak says. “Your beast jumping on her must have knocked some of the capsules. Charlie, it’s okay. We’re right here.” He climbs up next to me. “Get us back to Denestra Two, Jax.”
“I’ll comm the medical centre.”
Then we’re moving, and Dhak’s hands are on my face again.
“It’s just the toxin flooding your system again,” he says. “You know it’s not real, you know it’s just hallucinations. Listen to the sound of my voice. I’m right here.”
“You’re going to leave me behind,” I say.
He gives me a kind, patient sort of look. “Why would I do that?”
“Because I’m not…” I say.
Blackness is edging across my vision. I hear him say my name and then I’m out.
I wake up in a hospital bed. This is getting to be a bit of a habit.
My head is pounding, but my thoughts are less chaotic. If I could just stop the thumping pain at my temple, I think I could get them somewhere near straight.
“Hey,” Dhak says, rising from his seat by the window and dragging it to the side of my bed. “How are you feeling?”
“Headache,” I say, sitting myself upright. “But otherwise, better.”
“Bad dreams?”
I shake my head. “No hallucinations, either. Or memories. Just… bad thoughts.”
“That’s good. Well, it’s horrible, but the intensity isn’t a high. Can’t have burst too many of the toxin capsules.”
I scrub my eyes with the heels of my palms. “I feel horrible again. Evil octopus monster.”
He gives me a sympathetic look, touching a hand to my back, moving it in small circles. It’s nice, but it’s not what I want. I want to be held. I want to be wrapped in his arms so I feel tiny and safe. So I wrap my arms around his neck and his arms go around me, and it doesn’t matter that it’s not real, none of this is real. Because for a wonderful moment it’s just him and me, two pairs of arms wrapped around each other.
“Don’t leave me behind,” I say.
He does that cute little chuckle. “I’m not going to leave you behind, Charlie, I promise.”
“No matter what?”
“No matter what.”
He’s firm when he says it, as if nothing could shake his conviction. I feel better, reassured of his g
oodness. He’s a nice guy, a really nice guy, he wouldn’t abandon me.
But you’re still not going to give him any reason to, the devil on my shoulder says.
Chapter 19
Dhakhar
Denestra Two’s medics patch up Charlie’s hands and foot in a matter of minutes, but there’s not a lot they can do for her head.
“There’s no way to extract the toxin,” one says. “The capsules are too small. Try to take one, you end up crushing a load of others. Best just to ride it out. Avoid putting any pressure on your head. Be gentle with yourself. It will pass.”
Charlie nods, but she looks fragile as she walks with me to the transport that’s going to take us back to the docks. It’s not helped by the fact that her clothes are ripped and filthy. She’s a sorry sight all round.
My Dravosic side wants to snarl at everyone who looks in our direction, to put a possessive arm around her shoulders and hold her tight to me. As if being suffocated by an overbearing idiot is going to make her feel better.
Hell, I even snapped at Jax for making stupid jokes about belly rubs. I knew he was only being daft, but it sent a hot surge of jealousy through me all the same. I need to apologise, but I’m not sure how to say it without sounding like I’m losing my vecking mind.
I am losing my mind. Charlie is making me lose my mind.
Jaxran’s waiting for us at the Starlight.
“All your equipment is back where it belongs,” he says. “I’ve had your stores and supplies checked, too, you’re good to go. Nice boat, by the way. Didn’t have the time to fully appreciate it before. I need to steal me one of these.”
“You definitely won’t be able to afford one on your Sheriff’s wages,” I say.
If he’s at all annoyed about my earlier behaviour, he doesn’t show it. Just grins his usual grin. The visor could be hiding his true feelings but… I don’t think so.
“Thanks, Jax, I owe you big time.”
“You don’t owe me a damn thing,” he says. “Most excitement I’ve had in ages. Plus, quite a few of those guys my team rounded up yesterday have juicy bounties on them. Will pay for a whole heap of improvements for the community out here. Denestra’s in your debt for your help in apprehending them.”
“Perhaps we can call it quits then?” I say, grinning.
Jax grins back, then turns to Charlie. “It’s been a pleasure to meet you, ma’am. I’m only sorry your stay here wasn’t more enjoyable. If you ever find yourself in this end of the universe again, I would be happy to show you some true Denestran hospitality. We throw very good parties. The food is amazing.”
Charlie smiles and it almost reaches her eyes. “Thank you for sorting me out a wardrobe,” she says. “Sorry I already destroyed one outfit.”
She goes to raise her hand, but catches herself. I turn to Jaxran.
“When Humans want to say ‘thank you’,” I say. “They do shaking hands.”
Jaxran looks at his hand and shakes it. “Like this?”
Charlie laughs, and this time her face brightens with it. “Not quite.”
She holds out her hand towards Jaxran. He mimics the gesture, and when his hand is close enough to hers, she reaches out and takes it, moving it up and down like she did mine.
“Thank you, Jaxran,” she says again. “It was a pleasure to meet you, too.”
“Go and get yourself comfortable,” I say when she releases him. “I have a few final checks to make before we get underway. Time to get showered and changed if you want to.”
“You mean the weird slime mist thing?” she says, pulling a face.
“Vetruen cleanser,” Jaxran says. “Proof that there is such a thing as being too civilised.”
She laughs again, the crystal at her neck glowing just a little, then heads in to the ship.
“Final checks?” Jaxran says.
I shake my head. “Comm Mylan about the people you apprehended. I’ve got him and the others working on the smuggling ring, trying to put together any clues about their operation. Any evidence they were holding any other Humans in any of the tunnels your team explored?”
“Ah, don’t want to talk shop in front of your guest.”
“Don’t want her upset at the thought of more of her kind in cryostasis. More of her kind being sold into slavery. From what I saw yesterday, their base in that mine was pretty well established. They’ve been going a while.”
“They have,” Jaxran says. “We’re yet to fully pick through what was left in the mines after we took them out, but they weren’t holding any Humans in those tunnels. Not ones in cryostasis, anyway. Couldn’t with the Leshantu Crystal field. From what I saw, I would guess they’ve been using Denestra as an out of the way place to meet with buyers, discuss terms. There were several hundred thousand unmarked credits in one of the rooms.”
“Another boon for the Denestran populace?”
“Unless you wish me to hand it over to the UP-LE, Captain?”
“You’d be handing it to H’Varak,” I say. “Keep it. Just see that your people overpay the Xentra Junkers the next few times they deal with them.”
“That can definitely be arranged,” Jaxran says with a smile. “I’ll speak to your second. And that unsavoury Menarzi fellow you work with for some reason.”
“Taph? He’s not as awful as he likes people to think he is. He’s doing some digging for me. Definitely talk to him.”
Jax smirks, but his expression turns serious. “I’m not joking about there always being a job for you here if you want it, Dhak. It’s been nice having you around - kidnap attempts aside. Turn up at my door, no questions asked, I’ll find you work and a place to live by the next day.”
“And I’m very grateful to you for that,” I say.
When I summon Charlie to the bridge she’s dressed in what look like bedclothes - a long sleeved top and baggy trousers made of soft, thick material. Perfect for cold Denestran nights and cool spaceship environments.
“I just wanted to be comfortable,” she says when she notices me noticing.
“As long as you are comfortable,” I say, not sure where to look. There’s nothing obscene about her outfit, but once again, Vetruen sensibilities tell me I shouldn’t be seeing her dressed as she is.
“Is this another one of those things that you guys just don’t do?” she says. “I can change.”
She goes to rise, but I shake my head.
“It’s fine,” I say.
It’s not fine. I’m now imagining what it would be like to have her dressed like that and tucked into my arms at night. I want to hold her, protect her from the bad memories that plague her. Let her know that I’ll never let anyone hurt her again. Which is my Dravosic side going to intense extremes once again. I clamp down on it, fight back against the urge to protect her by smothering her, and put my focus into flying the Starlight out of Denestra’s atmosphere, hitting the acceleration, getting us back on track.
“The Commander asked me to take you to one of the planets between Nova Gate and Zeno Gate,” I say, once the acceleration phase is done. “Get you something… more appropriate to wear.”
“More appropriate like a ridiculously oversized dress?” she says, voice so full of sarcasm, I can’t help laughing.
“They were last season’s fashion, you know. No Vetruen would be caught dead wearing them.”
She rolls her eyes. “Should have guessed. Well, I thought it was pretty, but I’m done wearing it. The clothes I got on Denestra are fine.”
“All the same, the Commander has asked for it, so I will do it. There are four planets that would be not too far out of the way, and good choices. Plenty of places to see, things to do. And each of them have a no haunted mountain policy that’s quite comprehensive.”
She laughs again, her necklace glowing brighter. “I’m so very pleased to hear that. Which planet would you suggest?”
I pull up the star map and highlight the four planets in question, drawing them out of the screen and projecting them into the bridg
e. Charlie’s eyes go wide with delight, and she raises a hand to touch the planet spinning closest to her.
“You’ve got Nmibri, Chasira, Revento and Harth,” I say, pointing them out in turn. “Nmibri is very industrialised, very busy, very full on. One of the economic hubs of the core systems. Wouldn’t be my choice, but I will defer to you, of course. Chasira is much calmer, some would argue almost to the point of being boring. Pretty though. Revento is famous for its music scene. Most of the Protectorate’s musicians train there. It’s an accolade to say you came through one of Revento’s music schools. Harth is… It’s a party place. A bit like Chasira’s wilder cousin.”
“Are all planets so focused?” Charlie asks.
“Most of these worlds were terraformed. When populations started to overload the homeworlds of the various species, they started terraforming these more out of the way planets - usually with a specific function in mind. Holiday planets, farming planets, industrial planets. Keeps things simple if all the resources and all the expertise is in one place.”
“Makes sense,” she says.
She’s risen from her chair, walking between the planets. The light of the projection plays over her skin. She was made for this kind of half light. It brings out her delicate beauty like nothing else.
“I think Chasira,” she says, stopping by the planet in question. “I’m not very musical. And I’ve had enough of wild and full on to last me a good long while.”
I grin. “Setting course for Chasira then.”
She’s not on the bridge when H’Varak comms me, and I’m glad. This conversation isn’t going to be pretty.
“You’ve been on Denestra a full day,” he says, doing the kind of ‘I’m not yelling at you’ voice that you know means you’re in even worse trouble. I hate how he talks to me like I’m a child, but I can’t say it’s because he dislikes me in particular. He does it to everyone.
“Yes, sir,” I say. “We’ve successfully sourced more clothes for the princess, and are now on our way to Nova Gate, stopping at Chasira as per your request, then on to Zeno and Earth. Initial estimates were that the journey would take just north of two weeks Standard Time, but in this ship, I should be able to…”
Dhakhar Page 17
