by Reina Torres
And so she stayed and went to school, barely venturing out unless it was on an assignment for class. She wanted to learn, and learn fast, so that she could 'do' something with her life besides watch her father drink himself into a grumbling stupor every night. She wanted to see the world and prove that she wasn't a waste; that she was worth something more than what her father saw in her. Even though the women who shared her dorm were determined to get her to go out, she'd been hesitant about wasting time that could have been spent at her studies.
But life, and her dorm-mates, had a way of making things happen, no matter how much she wanted to argue. Dragged to a party down in the common area of the dorm, Finley met a student from the Frome Engineering Academy that was housed in the same building as the Institute, on floors six through nine. Russell Sattler, a transplant from Illinois, was a man who knew what he wanted. He wanted his degree, he wanted a plum assignment somewhere exotic in the world, and he wanted someone to share his adventures. Most women turned their noses up at the idea of living in small out of the way villages in developing countries. They couldn't even consider traveling somewhere that didn't have a spa and a concierge, so he found a kindred spirit in Finley.
To her, the idea of being with Russ was the perfect answer. She could travel with him, photograph the people, the architecture, the culture. It would be an adventure together. And he was also the perfect answer to her other worry. The last thing Russ wanted was children, but that didn't mean he didn't want sex. And sex was what he got. In the dark, under the covers, and somewhat staid. It was, in a word, uninspiring. But her life with Russ wasn't about passion. It was a partnership, one that was built on respect.
Or so she thought.
Until she found her husband with his local guide, in bed.
In. Her. Bed.
So Finley was done with Russ and beds. Neither one had done her any good.
The phone rang while she was lost in thought. She picked it up out of the cradle as she reached into the fridge and pulled out a half-eaten bottle of pickles. “Hello?”
“Hello? Finley?”
“Um, yea?” Finley fished a new can of tuna from the pantry shelf beside the counter, and set it next to the can opener she’d left out the other night. Certainly in no danger of being called domestic, she sighed and wondered who it was on the other end of the call. "Hello?"
“Sorry for the delay,” his voice was a little apologetic as he cleared his throat, “This is Trey DeLuca.”
“Trey?” Finley turned and leaned back against the counter. “I’d heard you were still around, happily married like some schmuck in a Hallmark Movie.”
“Hey,” he half-laughed at her, “don't say it like that. I've never been so happy.”
Obviously Trey was not up on the full turn of the St. Helena rumor mill. “Yeah, well, it’s not meant for all of us.” She continued on before it could become an issue. “What can I do for you, Trey? Need some family pictures done?”
“You know,” he paused, “that would be a great idea after the baby comes. I’ll talk to Sara. But I’m calling because I need your help with something else.”
“Oh?” She leaned back and looked out the window. “What do you need?”
“I need you to help with the Mighty Mites… tonight.”
“Tonight?” The idea both perked her interest and gave her a good case of the heebs. “I'm not sure what I can contribute."
"Well, the boys have to try new things to get these badges.” She could hear voices enter the room on the other side of the phone, ringing telephones. “Originally we were planning on the Stamp Collecting badge, but Mr. Lee, the old Post Master, is down with the flu.”
“Probably not something you want spread around the kiddie group. I get it.” She left the tuna alone on the counter and pulled open the fridge looking for a drink, but she closed it a moment later, empty handed. “I don’t know a thing about stamps. I think the last time I put one on the envelope the clerk laughed at me for putting about twice the amount I needed.”
“Well,” Trey’s voice perked up, and she could tell he was getting ready for the hard sell, “they have one for photography.”
She could hear his smile through the phone and knew he had her on the hook. “That’s a low blow, Trey.” Finley had gone for a stern tone, but she was laughing by the time she said his name and he’d joined in. “What do you need me to do?”
“Give me a second.” He mumbled a little to himself and then she heard the telltale sound of a Smartphone camera shutter and then the sharp Bing as her phone got a message. “There you go.”
“You’re so handy, Trey.” She put extra effort into her bright tone, knowing that he'd preen a bit over the complement.
“I'm so glad you noticed, Finley.” There was a squeak of a chair on the other end of the call.
She looked at the list of requirements. “How long do I have with the boys?”
He rattled off the timing of the meeting, including all the opening and closing stuff that they had to do. “You’ll have a good half hour… Forty-five minutes. Think you can get a good start?”
“I only have three cameras the boys can use; it might take a while.”
“No problem.As we’re speaking, I am emailing the other families to bring a camera if they can.” Another swoosh of sound. “Done!”
Finley groaned. “You are positively domestic.”
“I am a man of many talents.” He paused and started speaking again. “You need a ride?”
Just the thought of sitting in a car with Trey and his family gave her a case of the hives. She fought down the nauseating rush and let out a breath. “I've got my car.”
“I have to get going and finish up with these contracts so I can pick up Cooper from school. Thanks for helping out, Finley.”
“Yeah, sure.” As the phone call ended, the soft artificial click echoing in her ears, she let out a long breath. A whole bunch of young kids… at one time.
Her stomach tightened, twisting into a knot. “What the hell was I thinking?”
But she had to look at this as an opportunity. Photography, more specifically family portraits could be a good business here in St. Helena. The lack of commercial department store photo studios gave her a unique market and Trey DeLuca was part of one of the most prominent families in town. Unlike the odd circle of acquaintances that her father had, the DeLucas had a large close knit family. Doing a favor for Trey was also something that made her feel good. He had been nice to her in high school. They hadn’t been close at all, but he'd taken her quirks in stride. And that was something she valued, people that let her be… her.
#
The day had been pure hell for Roman. An abandoned mobile home at the far edge of town limits caught fire. Concerned neighbors had called it in and by the time they had the engine on the road, they could see the column of smoke over the trees. When all was said and done, the fire had been put out, a donkey that no one knew was on the property had been found barely able to stand. And by the time his men had verified that there wasn't a single hotspot left, Shay had arrived with a vehicle large enough to transport the donkey to a vet.
There had been just enough time to get back to the station and scrub off the soot and grime from the fire and make his way to the library for the Mighty Mites meeting.
Pushing open the back door to the library, Roman enjoyed the chill of the air conditioning on his face and slowed his steps, looking around.
Sara got his attention with a wave from where she was sitting, tucked up against Trey’s side.
Roman crossed the room to greet them both. He leaned in and brushed a gentle kiss on her cheek. “Thanks again for bringing Matt with you.”
Sara gave him one of her brilliant smiles as he stepped away.
"Never a problem." Sara's smile was soft. "We're always happy to help when you need us."
"Well, it means a lot that Matt doesn't have to wait for me when things happen." He looked over the room. "What did I miss?" Roman adjusted
the collar on his Commander uniform.
Sara opened her mouth to say something, but Trey beat her to it.
“The boys broke up into groups, but Matt's around here somewhere.”
With a nod, Roman started to work his way around the room.
"I wish I had some popcorn." Trey whispered to her before he kissed her cheek.
Sara turned in her husband’s embrace and nailed him with a suspicious look. “What's that?”
He brushed his cheek against hers. "When I asked Finley to come and help tonight, I took care of two birds with one stone." Taking her shoulders in his, he turned her toward the reading corner.
She caught Roman’s son Matt listening with rapt attention as Finley showed him how to remove and then load an SD card. “But what does that-" She gasped as her husband's lips brushed lightly against the shell of her ear.
“Roman and Finley have been friends for a lifetime, my love.” His laugh was soft and she could feel it vibrating where he touched her. “But I haven't figured out if Roman knows he’s been in love with her since high school.”
“What?” Sara leaned closer to watch the scene unfold.
#
Once the boy beside her had demonstrated loading the SD card into the camera, Finley picked up his badge book and signed off on the requirement. "Okay," she looked at the boy, "how about we try the focal point exercise so I can mark that off too." She held out a transparency divided into nine sections.
He took it in his hand, but he didn't use it.
She smiled at him, finding it not nearly as anxiety inducing as it normally was. "Put one of the points on your subject."
He pressed his lips together as he searched the room through the makeshift viewfinder, but he didn't stop until he saw someone walking toward them. "Oh!" He placed one of the points smack dab on the face of Roman Brady. "Like that?"
Finley’s stomach fell while her heart catapulted into her throat. "Just like that."
"Dad!" The boy beamed up at the fireman. "I made a picture of you in my head!" He waved the transparency in his hands. "Later I want to take one for real!"
Roman's rugged face broke into a smile and Finley almost groaned aloud. If she'd thought Roman was hot before, being a doting dad made him nearly an inferno. Her cheeks and other places warmed up to a fever pitch as the boy launched himself into his father's arms.
Finley met Roman's eyes over his son's head, but she couldn't seem to speak.
He looked back at her, his hand running a slow reassuring circle over his son’s back, pressing a kiss to his cheek before setting the boy back down on his feet.
Matt, leaned against Roman's leg and looked up at him. “This is my dad!”
Finley let out a breath and then sucked one right back in. “I can see that.” She fished in her jeans pocket and pulled out a rubber band, quickly pulling her hair into a loose ponytail just to give her hands something to do. “We were just working on his badge.”
#
Roman saw the stiff movements of her hands and the way her eyes widened just a bit. She was covering it well, but Finley was about to jump out of her skin.
One of the boys across the room jumped up on his feet and stuck his hand in the air. “Miss Finley, I need your help.”
The look of utter relief on her face was too obvious for Roman to miss. He watched as she crossed the room to help the other Mighty Mites. Matt trailed after her with a smile.
Roman turned around and zeroed in on Trey who, to his credit, looked a little embarrassed. "You want to tell me what she's doing here?'
Trey shrugged. “I called her when Mr. Lee had to cancel at the last minute. It was my turn to organize the meeting, so I found a replacement.” He looked at Sara and continued on. “Finley is a photographer and there's a photography badge. It seemed like the perfect solution.” His gaze swiveled back to Roman. “And you guys have been friends forever, man. I didn’t think this would be a problem.”
“It’s not.” Roman knew he didn’t sound like he believed his own words. “Not in that way.” He hoped beyond hope that Trey wouldn’t push for more information.
"Why don’t you go and see if you can help.” Sara gave her husband’s arm a shove,
Trey knew he had been excused and Roman couldn’t hide the tight smile that pulled at his lips as the other man walked away like he’d been kicked in the shins.
When Roman turned back, Sara gave the seat next to her a pat and he sat down. "That's better," she sighed. "You're not towering over me."
"Sorry."
"No apologies," she replied, smoothing her hand over her rounded belly. "What has you so upset?"
"Finley." He felt her name roll through him like a tide. "She doesn't like children."
"Doesn't like," she repeated, "or is it something else?" As they sat together they watched a number of boys crowd around Finley, all demanding her attention. "If she didn't like them, they'd know," she began. "Kids know that by instinct."
"I met Finley when we found her asleep on our porch when we were little kids." He drew in a long breath and let it out. "Her father hadn't even noticed that she was missing. He didn't notice much about her until he needed something. To him, kids were a waste of his time. "
"And she felt that deep down." Sara's eyes misted up and he found a handkerchief in one of his pockets. "Feelings like that don't go away easily."
"She always said she wanted nothing to do with children."
"Do you think she meant it?" He could see the concern in Sara's eyes.
"I hope not... not really." He sat back and opened his hands in a helpless gesture. "I wanted them to meet, just not like this."
He could feel Sara's eyes on him, and then her hand on his arm. "I'm sorry. Trey was trying to help."
Roman growled. "Yeah, everyone's trying to help, but things between us have to go at their own pace." He watched Finley at the center of boys and saw her tense when Matt leaned up against her shoulder. "When she left years ago," he spoke so softly, he wasn't sure he'd said it out loud. "I thought I would be okay. After all," he gave Sara a boyish grin, "I was the one who pushed her to apply for the scholarship."
"But you thought she'd come back."
He nodded. "I was so sure she'd come right back home. But two years later I got a letter from her. She was getting married. His name was Russell Sattler, and he was going to take her to see the world. She said she was relieved that she didn't have to come back and get stuck here."
Sara's hand tightened on his arm.
"I knew she didn't want to come back and live with her dad, but I thought that one day-"
"Roman," he heard the sorrow in her voice and rushed on.
"We were friends. I never told her how I felt. Never admitted what I wanted because she wanted nothing to do with a family of her own, but I couldn't let it go," he explained. "I drove all night and got to Vegas just in time. She told me how excited she was, how much fun she was going to have, and that it meant so much to have me there." He cleared his throat, trying to keep the old memories at bay. "She asked me to give her away."
Sara shifted slightly on her chair, her rounded belly brushing his arm. "And you did."
He nodded. "And then I came back and joined the department, determined to focus on whatever it took to get her out of my head."
"You must have met Kathleen around that time."
Roman's grimace was telling. "Kathleen and I, we just happened. She wanted me and I wanted... to be wanted." He sank a little lower on the chair. "When she found out she was pregnant, I was thrilled. We got married, she had the baby, and I was just a few months from getting out of my FNG status at the station." He drew in a breath and let it out. It had been years since he'd been the Fucking New Guy, but he could still feel the unease twisting in his middle. "But one day we got back to the station after a call, and Kathleen's mother was sitting there in the engine bay holding Matt." He cleared his throat. "Kathleen had left, and Kent, one of my friends on the off-duty crew, had gone with her."
Roman shook off the question. "She left Kent a few months later." He looked down at his knees. "I almost felt sorry for the guy."
"And now," Sara was pretty familiar with his current situation, "she shows up whenever she wants to."
"She gets her fill," Roman nodded, "and then she's gone."
"Are you worried that Finley will be the same way?"
"I think she's so afraid of caring that she'd do anything to keep her distance. I just have to show her I'm willing to wait until she's ready to try.
"Can you?" Sara shifted on the chair. "Can you wait?"
"What choice do I have?" He sent a look across the room before he turned back to Sara. "She's it for me. I just have to find a way to get her to believe it."
Chapter Ten
It had been days since the Mighty Mites meeting when Finley had ducked out during the 'closing ceremony.' And while he knew she was busy around town, they hadn't seen each other or talked. So it had been a surprise when he and Adam had arrived at Adam's house after work and found Finley at the table with Harper, sharing a glass of wine. One look at Adam's wife said she was just as shocked as he was. They suffered through an almost silent dinner, and just when he was convinced he'd have to call a car so he could leave early, Finley shocked him again by offering to drive him home.
