“I want you.”
“I’m not laying a finger on you in this state.” He gets up off the bed and pulls back the covers. “I’m going home.”
He forces her to sit on the edge of the bed as he kneels before her and pulls off her boots. She’s beginning to stop resisting. She’s woozy and tired. Lacking proper coordination and depth perception, she removes her weapons and tries to place them on the bedside table.
Fail.
Her gun slips off the edge and clatters down to the floor.
Alex winces at the sound, and hurries to get her under the covers as fast as possible so that he can make his exit.
Too late.
The sound of the falling gun was the last straw, and the bedroom door swings open.
Maydevine.
Appearing just in time to see Ella lying prone in the bed with Alex leaning over her, he begins to fume.
He glares at Ella. “Where the fuck have you been?!”
He knows exactly where she’s been—she has GPS.
“And you!” He turns to Alex. “You’ve got some fucking nerve.”
Alex backs away from the bed. “Sir, I only wanted to make sure she got home safely.”
“And you felt the need to tuck her into bed?”
Ella giggles again, and that doesn’t make things any better. Maydevine orders Alex out of her room, marching him down the hallway and out onto the front porch. Without saying a word, Alex tries to turn and walk away. Unfortunately for him, Maydevine’s not about to let him escape so easily. Not only that, but it’s already one o’clock in the morning, and Maydevine doesn’t have the patience for tact.
“Are you fucking my daughter?”
The bluntness of the question takes Alex by surprise, but you’d never know it. Fatigue and liquor are dulling his senses, and his reaction is almost uncharacteristically understated.
“No, sir. I’m not fucking your daughter, and nor do I want to.”
“Are you sure that’s the answer you want to give me?”
“It’s the truth, sir.”
He’s not lying—not completely—but Maydevine feels deceived nonetheless. Annoyed, he slams the front door closed.
Alex drags his weary self home with his tail between his legs. He won’t sleep, though. His apartment is cold and lonely, and deadly quiet. Throwing on an old t-shirt and a pair of jeans, he settles down on the couch with a beer and a comic book.
Time passes.
He’s so engrossed in the comic, he doesn’t hear the gentle knock at first.
Tip, tap, tap.
Again.
Alex checks the clock: it’s four a.m.. Someone at the door? Really? At this hour? Begrudgingly, he responds to it.
It’s Ella.
Fresh out of the shower, her hair is damp and free and she smells like lavender. For the first time all day, there’s no blood on her. In jeans and a tank top, she’s casual, but still armed.
“May I come in?” she asks.
Without speaking, Alex steps aside and lets her into his home. He can tell that she’s disappointed with him, though he doesn’t know if it’s because he’d refused to go to bed with her, or because of what he’d said—or not said—to Maydevine.
As it turns out, it’s both.
She starts with, “Why did you lie to Maydevine?”
“I didn’t lie,” he insists, closing the door and following her into his living room. “He asked me if I was fucking you, and I said no.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s the truth.”
“But don’t you want to?”
Alex doesn’t know precisely how to answer that, so he tries to redirect the conversation. “You should be in bed, sleeping it off.”
“I slept a little, but every time my mind wandered, I found myself thinking of you.”
Silence.
Ella discards her weapons on the couch and takes a step closer to him, still waiting for an answer to her question.
Finally, she gets one.
“I just want to make sure I do the right thing by you, that’s all.”
Undaunted by his obvious trepidation, she puts herself within arm’s reach of him.
“Take off your shirt.”
“El …”
“Take it off.”
He does as he’s told, revealing an impressive Hunter Division physique that’s normally hidden beneath several layers of thick Kevlar. Ella’s eyes begin to wander.
Jackpot.
Stomach flip.
“Well”—a smile begins to tug at the corner of her mouth—“that answers one of my first questions.”
“You heard the third nipple rumor, too?”
She places her hand gently upon his naked chest, her palm pressed against his skin, her touch sending a surge of fire from his head to his toes. Slipping a hand around her waist, he pulls her closer.
“Why me? Of all the Hunters Maydevine ever sent to extract you from the Belt, what made you set your sights on me?”
“You think I chose to feel this way about you?”
“You’ve deliberately pursued me since the day we met out there.”
“I had no choice. I just did what my heart wanted me to do.” She tickles her fingers over his pecs and down slowly over his abs. “Why won’t you let me have you?” She hooks her fingers over his belt. “How explicitly do I have to ask?”
All his blood rushes south at the thought of claiming her, and he pulls her into a kiss. Lifting her up onto a nearby table—sending random household objects tumbling to the floor—he parts her legs and holds himself firmly against her.
She craves him.
Wrapping her legs around him, she helps him to remove his belt, and then …
Beeeeeeeeeeep!
His cell phone.
“Ignore it,” she pleads. “Whatever it is, it can wait.”
She knows he won’t. She knows he has to look.
Alex pulls the thing out of his pocket and checks it quickly, expecting to see an automated message from the DDH.
Instead, it’s Maydevine:
SEND MY DAUGHTER HOME.
NOW.
Alex hangs his head in defeat, all hint of arousal lost at the thought of his angry boss. He shows the message to Ella.
“Fuck him.” She grabs the phone and tosses it onto the couch. “I’m an adult, and he can’t do anything about it.”
“I have to work with him tomorrow.”
“And I have to live with him. So what?”
Alex forces himself to move away from her. “It shouldn’t happen like this.”
“So talk to him. If you don’t like the lies, stop telling them.”
“It’s not just that. I have to make sure I do this properly.”
“What the hell does that even mean?”
“Once I talk to Maydevine, there’s no going back.” Alex runs a hand through his hair. “He’ll expect things from me.”
Ella shrugs. “Of course. That’s the price you pay for being with the Hunter General’s daughter. I told you that in the very beginning. I’m not one of those bitches, remember?”
“I’d be giving up so much more than just a job, El. Not to mention the torture of having to sit back and watch you risk your life every day, knowing that I couldn’t be there to protect you.”
“What did I say about your motherly concern defining the course of our relationship?”
“I know. I just—”
“Do you want children?”
Alex looks stunned. “I—”
“Is that part of it?”
Alex doesn’t answer.
Tears well in Ella’s eyes. “So you’ve forgotten everything you said to me that night you took me to the hospital?”
Alex isn’t sure what she’s getting at, so she fills him in.
“You said that any man who really deserved me wouldn’t think twice about it.” She backhands the tears away and heads for the door. “So I guess this means one of two things: either you’re completely fu
ll of shit, or …”
“Or?”
“You just don’t deserve me.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Fuck YOU
A week passes.
Ella requests a transfer to another Hunter Division unit to continue her internship, and tries to keep herself so busy that she has no time for her thoughts to wander. If Maydevine is curious to know what’s going on, he doesn’t ask. Rather, he intends to let it run its course.
She’s been staying out of trouble, and her instructors have all been happy with her progress. Today, she is made an example of—in a good way, for the first time in her life. Made to stand in front of her class to demonstrate the correct and proper way to snap a Chimera’s neck, she feels a sense of pride in her work. No longer just the unruly kid with a fast temper and a bad attitude, she’s quickly transforming herself into the Academy’s golden girl.
Excused from class early—thanks to her proficiency in the art of neck snapping—she opts to sweat her ass off in the afternoon heat, running laps of the playing field outside the Academy. Listening to Old World music on her portable music player, it’s three full laps before she realizes she’s being watched.
Alex.
On the fourth lap, she slows and stops beside him. Wiping sweat away from her face with the bottom half of her tank top, she inadvertently gives him a brief tease of the glistening, toned torso that could’ve been his for keeps. She loops the headphones around her neck and begins stretching her legs against the trunk of a nearby tree.
“What’re you doing here?”
“Thirsty?” He offers her a bottle of cold water.
She accepts it, but only because she’s badly dehydrated.
“Thanks, but that doesn’t answer my question.”
“I want to talk to you.”
“I’ve got nothing to say to you.” She downs half the bottle, glancing at his attire.
No emblems, just jeans and a t-shirt.
Her conclusion: something’s up.
“You’re not working today?”
“I took some personal time.”
“Oh, yeah? How’s that working out for you?”
“I’ve had a lot of time to think.”
“Reached any conclusions?”
“Several.”
“Congratulations.” More water.
“Can I buy you dinner?”
“At a restaurant?”
“Obviously.”
“In public?”
“I guess so.”
“And you can handle that?” She finishes the water.
“I don’t have a choice.”
“Sure you do. Just pretend you never met me. How hard could it be? You’ve been doing it all week.”
“This past week has been torture.”
“Boo-fucking-hoo.” Ella tosses the empty water bottle back at him.
He catches it clumsily. “You transferred to a different unit.”
“Uh-huh. Was it the sudden lack of mid-shift blowjobs that alerted you to my absence?”
“Wow. Is it just me, or are you being especially vicious today?”
“It’s something extra, just for you,” she assures him. “Does it make you feel special?”
“I feel like shit actually. I thought seeing you might make things better, but instead, you’ve just managed to compound the feeling.”
“Flatterer.”
“Look, I get why you’re being so cold with me—I really do. I deserve it. I disappointed you, and I deserve every lash of your acerbic tongue, but I’m not gonna let you pull the plug on this just to spite me.”
Silence.
He locks eyes with her. “I have a reservation at Keystones on the waterfront at eight. Meet me there, or don’t. Either way, I’m ordering the lobster.”
*************************
At five, she was in the shower. At six, she was doing her homework. By seven, she was watching the clock. Though, honestly, she didn’t know whether or not she was even going to go and meet Alex until the hour was creeping up and she was rushing not to be late.
By the time she gets to the restaurant, Alex is already there. He’s wearing a charcoal gray suit, a silk tie, and cufflinks that were a gift from Maydevine. His hair’s ruffled from all the times he’s dragged his fingers through it, and he’s drumming his foot rapidly against the floor. Between the fingers of his right hand, he’s holding the handle of a teaspoon, repeatedly tapping the end of it with his thumb.
He’s nervous.
He wants a cigarette.
Taking him by surprise, Ella slips her hand over his knee, forcing him to stop fidgeting as she slides into the booth opposite him.
“That’s a sign of sexual frustration.”
“What is?”
“Rocking your leg up and down like that.” She withdraws her hand. “It’s a symptom of too much pent up sexual energy. And this”—she removes the teaspoon from his hand—“is a sign that you shouldn’t have picked a non-smoking restaurant.”
“I picked the nicest restaurant in the city.”
“For my benefit?”
“Is that for mine?” He points to her t-shirt.
The old and well-worn ‘Fuck Chimera’ t-shirt has received yet another amendment. ‘Chimera’ has been scratched out, and ‘you’ has been written next to it in capital letters.
Fuck YOU.
Alex glances around at their rather posh surroundings: suits and evening dresses at every table. He looks back at Ella: vulgar t-shirt, hoodie, and jeans.
“You couldn’t have worn something a little less provocative?”
He’s pleased that she came, but wishes she weren’t still holding a grudge against him for their last late night encounter.
“You want me to take it off?” she offers.
“I think that’d just be more provocative, but in a different way.”
A waitress appears at their table, but Ella doesn’t even give her the chance to introduce herself.
“Lobster.”
“Excuse me?”
“I want the lobster, and a bottle of white rum.”
“Uhh …” The waitress looks to Alex for confirmation. “We don’t sell white rum by the bottle.”
“You have white rum?” he asks her.
She nods.
“And it comes in a bottle?”
More nodding.
“Then sell her the damn bottle. Double the order of lobster, and bring two glasses with the liquor.” He shoos her away.
A few seconds later, his restless leg resumes.
Ella kicks him in the shin. “Stop that.”
“Ow. I’m sorry.”
“Why so anxious anyway? I thought you said you were over your social unease.”
“I am over it. At least, I’m trying to be.” He bites on a fingernail. “I know I’m running out of chances with you, and I don’t wanna screw this up again.”
Their booze arrives. A bottle of stone cold, weak, New World white rum, accompanied by two glasses. After a brief bout of silence, Alex opts for a conversational gear shift.
“I really care for you a lot, Ella. Do you know that?”
“How the fuck would I know that? By all the attention you’ve been lavishing on me?”
“I know I’ve gone about this all the wrong way, but I meant what I said when I told you I wanted to do the right thing by you. The last thing I want to do is screw up your life.”
“How the hell would you do that?”
“Everything that’s ever happened to you has been a part of this giant master plan, constructed by Maydevine since the day he adopted you. He has so many great hopes for you, and I don’t think any of them include you being with someone like me.”
Someone like him? A child from the foster program? Ella’s unsure. Alex has never really spoken about his parents, but growing up in the lost and found, as it’s known, is a stigma that’ll follow you for your entire life—if you let it. And he certainly seems to be hung up on it.
Havi
ng not just one, but both parents banished is a pretty strong indicator that you’ve probably inherited some seriously flawed genetics. And he’s absolutely right: such an inferior bloodline would normally be considered unsuitable for the daughter of the Hunter General. Fortunately, Maydevine happens to have a soft spot for this particular orphan.
“So what am I?” She folds her arms. “A robot? What I want doesn’t matter?”
“Being with you can never be a casual thing, that’s all I’m saying. Maydevine doesn’t see things for what they are now, he sees everything fifty moves ahead. When you kiss me today, he sees you giving up your place in the Hunter Division a year from now, just so you can lie in my bed.”
Ella snorts. “He knows better than that.”
“Then he sees you with a broken heart, because he imagines that I’ll refuse to do what’s necessary.”
“You haven’t exactly been giving him any reason to doubt that, though, have you?”
“You’re right, but I also need you to know what this means for me, too.”
Ella sighs. “Yes, you want babies.”
“That’s a gross oversimplification, and it’s not true.”
“Don’t lie.”
“I’m not lying, El. Honestly, I’ve never even thought about having babies.”
“That’s not what it seemed like the last time we had this conversation.”
“You didn’t give me the chance to articulate myself properly. The truth is, it never occurred to me that I wouldn’t have babies.”
“I don’t understand.” Ella cocks her head.
“We live in a city that prohibits healthy married couples from using birth control. Ergo, having babies is pretty much an inevitability for most people. So even though I wasn’t making plans for it, it never crossed my mind that it wouldn’t happen someday.”
Ella looks down into the bottom of her drink. “Until you met me.”
“Meeting you wasn’t the problem. Falling for you was where all the trouble came from.”
Ella’s stomach flips.
“I don’t want to take you away from the Hunter Division,” Alex continues. “If that’s where you feel like you belong, then I don’t want to get in the way of that. And if I can’t accept a future with you under those conditions, then I can’t be with you. It’s as simple as that.”
Ella feels empty.
Inamorato Page 19
