‘Pet-O-Rama will also donate prizes for the winner,’ she said.
I LIKED-LIKED-LIKED that idea!
‘I’d like to see a hamster race myself,’ Mr Morales said.
‘BOING!’ my neighbour agreed.
‘Og!’ Mr Morales said. ‘What do you think of a hamster race?’
Og bounced up and down in his tank.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ he said.
‘We should have a frog race, too,’ Mr Morales said. ‘But I don’t think they have cars for frogs.’
‘Sorry, Og,’ I squeaked to my friend.
‘We’ll make our plans tomorrow,’ Mrs Brisbane said. ‘Time to put this away.’
She took the red car and put it on a bookcase shelf.
Luckily, it was the bottom shelf!
Everyone in class was so excited about the race, but no one was more excited than I was!
*
That night, when Aldo came in to clean, he had a big smile on his face. Of course, Aldo always has a big smile each night he comes to Room 26.
‘Humphrey! I heard the news,’ he said as he pushed his cleaning trolley through the door.
‘I hear there’s going to be a racing day,’ he said.
‘BOING-BOING,’ Og chimed in.
Aldo began to sweep the floor.
‘That’s one race I’m not going to miss,’ he said. ‘After all, I have to cheer for my buddy.’
‘Thanks, Aldo!’ I squeaked.
I LOVE-LOVE-LOVE it when Aldo comes to clean.
But I have to admit, I was happy when he left that night.
As soon as he was gone, I jiggled the lock-that-doesn’t-lock on my cage.
The door opened wide and I scurried across the table.
‘I’m going for a ride, Og,’ I squeaked.
I slid down the leg of the table and ran across the floor to the bookcase.
There it was. The bright shiny red car!
I pulled myself up on to the bottom shelf of the bookcase.
I wanted to take it for a spin, so I gave it a little push.
The car rolled off the shelf and hit the floor with a BUMP.
It ROLLED-ROLLED-ROLLED across the floor.
‘Wait for me!’ I shouted.
The car rolled between the tables in Room 26.
‘Stop!’ I squeaked.
‘BOING-BOING!’ Og sounded worried.
Just then, the car hit the leg of A.J.’s chair and it stopped.
‘Thank you,’ I said.
I stood up on my tippy-toes and popped the side door open.
Then I climbed inside.
‘Here goes, Og!’ I squeaked.
I began to spin the wheel.
The car started slowly.
Then I spun the wheel faster. And faster.
The car zoomed across the room.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og cheered.
I thought about Winky racing next to me in his blue car, so I spun even faster.
I remembered that my car didn’t have a steering wheel, so I couldn’t turn it.
‘Eeek!’ I squeaked.
I stopped spinning, but the car kept on going until – BUMP! It hit the wall and stopped.
I climbed out of the top, which I hadn’t been able to close with my paws.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og leaped up really high!
‘I’m fine, Og,’ I told him. ‘But I don’t think I can drive the car out of the corner.’
‘BOING!’ Og dived into the water side of his tank and started splashing.
I have to admit, I was WORRIED-WORRIED-WORRIED.
Wouldn’t Mrs Brisbane wonder how the car ended up in the corner?
Or what if she couldn’t find it the next morning? Would she call off the race?
What if she found out that I had a lock-that-doesn’t-lock … and then fixed it?
I could never get out and have an adventure again!
Then I had an unsqueakably good idea.
I squeezed into the corner and began to push the car towards the room.
UMPH! I’m a very strong hamster, but it was much harder to move the car that way.
I pushed for a while.
Then I rested for a while.
I pushed and rested for the rest of the night.
There was sunlight peeking through the window when I finally got the car to the bookcase.
Of course, I couldn’t push it up on the shelf, but at least Mrs Brisbane would see it there.
I scurried across the floor and used the cord from the blinds to swing myself back on to the table, as I’ve done so many times before.
‘I did it,’ I squeaked as I raced past Og’s tank.
‘BOING-BOING!’ Og said.
I pulled the cage door behind me and went into my sleeping hut.
I was so tired, I slept through maths, reading and science.
After all, I’d had a LONG-LONG-LONG night.
I was unsqueakably surprised when I woke up and heard Mrs Brisbane say, ‘Class, the great hamster race will be this Friday.’
‘Eeek!’ I squeaked.
‘That’s right, Humphrey,’ Mrs Brisbane said. ‘You’d better practise.’
She went over to the bookcase to get my really wheely car.
‘What’s it doing on the floor?’ she asked. ‘Maybe it rolled out when Aldo was cleaning last night.’
‘Yes!’ I squeaked.
It was a fib, but at least my lock-that-doesn’t-lock was safe!
For the next few days, Mrs Brisbane let me practise racing my car around Room 26 while my friends took spelling tests and solved maths problems.
One afternoon, they made little banners on sticks.
‘We’ll all be sure to wave our banners to cheer Humphrey and Winky on,’ Mrs Brisbane explained.
‘I let Winky ride his car every night,’ Mandy said.
‘Good,’ I squeaked. ‘May the best hamster win.’
As soon as I said it, I realised that in the end, Winky might end up winning.
But at least I’d give the race my best.
*
Friday was a very surprising day!
First, Mandy arrived at school with Winky.
She put his cage on the table by the window next to mine.
Winky had never been to school before.
After sitting through the morning lessons, Winky told Og and me that he thought being a classroom pet was unsqueakably wonderful.
‘But I still love being Mandy’s hamster,’ he said.
Of course he did!
After lunch, Mrs Brisbane announced that the race was about to begin.
The whole class lined up and went out into the big hallway.
Mandy carried Winky’s cage.
Miranda carried my cage.
‘What about Og? He’ll feel left out,’ A.J. said.
‘No, he won’t,’ Mrs Brisbane said. ‘I have a surprise for Og.’
A surprise for Og? What could it be?
Some of the other classes from Longfellow school were already lined up on both sides of the hallway.
Down the middle, there were racing lanes divided by rows of wooden blocks.
There were two lines taped to the floor.
One line was marked ‘Start.’
The other line was marked ‘Finish.’
Mr Morales stood by the line marked ‘Start.’
He wore a tie with little race cars on it.
‘Students, the great hamster race is about to begin,’ he said.
My classmates cheered and waved their banners.
‘Here you go, Humphrey,’ Mrs Brisbane said as she put me in my really wheely car.
She closed the side and set the car on the start line.
Mandy put Winky in his blue car and set it next to mine.
‘Good luck, pal!’ I squeaked.
‘Same to you, Humph!’ Winky replied.
Mr Morales said, ‘Ready, steady, go!’
Mrs Brisbane gave my car a gentle push.
I didn’t waste any time in getting the wheel spinning.
I kept my eyes straight ahead as I spun faster and faster.
‘Humphrey, you’re ahead!’ the students chanted.
‘Faster, Winky! You can win!’ they cheered.
I looked back.
Yes, I was ahead, but Winky was close behind me.
I spun my wheel even faster.
And then a terrible thing happened.
I was spinning as fast as I could, but my really wheely car wasn’t moving!
It had rolled up against a wooden block.
I was stuck!
I heard people moaning. ‘Oh, no, Humphrey!’
I heard the crowd shout, ‘Go, Winky! There’s the finish line!’
Winky was going to win.
I spun and spun but the car didn’t budge, so I did the only thing I could.
I reached over and pushed the side door of the car as hard as I could.
Success! The door opened and I crawled out of the car.
Maybe I couldn’t win the race in my car, but I could still cross the line first!
The cheering got louder and louder.
As I raced for the finish line, I saw the banners waving above me.
I glanced up over the wooden blocks and saw Winky’s blue car just inches ahead of me.
I ran and ran as fast as my paws could carry me and I passed the blue car!
The finish line was right in front of me, so I sprinted across it.
Winky’s blue car crossed the line a few seconds later.
I had won!
Or so I thought.
‘Humphrey! Humphrey! Humphrey!’ the crowd cheered.
Mrs Brisbane scooped me up and held me in her hand.
‘Quiet, everyone!’ Mr Morales said.
Since he is the Most Important Person at Longfellow School, the crowd quietened down.
‘Humphrey crossed the finish line first,’ he said. ‘But he wasn’t in his car. This was a hamster car race, so I think Winky is the winner.’
‘No!’ I heard some students say.
‘Winky was the first hamster to cross the line in his car,’ he said.
‘But Humphrey was so smart,’ Golden-Miranda said. ‘He knew he was stuck and he still found a way to win.’
Mr Morales nodded. ‘That’s true,’ he said. ‘And I’m proud of Humphrey. But I still think that Winky won.’
‘I have an idea,’ another voice said.
I knew that voice.
Aldo stepped forward.
‘What if we call it a tie?’ he asked.
Mr Morales thought. ‘We could do that,’ he said.
Suddenly everyone began to cheer. ‘Tie! Tie! Tie!’
Mr Morales raised both hands to quieten them down.
‘All right,’ he said. ‘I think we can call this a tie. Is that all right with you, Mandy?’
‘They both did a great job,’ Mandy said. ‘Winky is my pet and Humphrey is my classroom’s pet. So I think … it’s a tie!’
The cheering was so loud, it hurt my small hamster ears.
‘Humphrey and Winky will each receive a First Place certificate and a box of Hamster Chew-Chews from Pet-O-Rama,’ Mr Morales said.
I LOVE-LOVE-LOVE Hamster Chew-Chews.
The crowd got noisy again, but Mr Morales raised his hands.
‘We have one more contest this afternoon,’ he said. ‘Longfellow School has two classroom frogs, so we’re going to have a frog-jumping contest.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ I heard Og say.
The crowd cheered.
‘George is the classroom pet in Miss Loomis’s class,’ he said. ‘Og is the pet in Mrs Brisbane’s class. We’re going to place them each at the starting line and see which one can jump the furthest.’
I remembered George! He was the reason that Og came to Room 26 in the first place.
Og was in Miss Loomis’s class along with George, but George didn’t like Og.
Since George was a huge bullfrog with a BIG-BIG-BIG voice, he made so much noise that Miss Loomis couldn’t teach her class.
She gave Og to Room 26 and he’s been here ever since.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og shouted.
I could tell he was ready for the frog-jumping contest.
Miss Loomis set George down on the starting line.
Mrs Brisbane set Og down in his lane.
Og had a nice smile on his face.
George had a mean leer on his face.
And he was HUGE.
Could Og jump further than a great big bullfrog?
Mr Morales said, ‘Ready, steady, jump!’
Miss Loomis let go of George and Mrs Brisbane let go of Og.
Nothing happened at first.
George sat on the starting line and so did Og.
Suddenly, George took a giant leap forward.
The crowd cheered, but Og didn’t budge.
‘Go on, Og! You can win,’ I squeaked.
Og still didn’t move.
‘Go, Og, go!’ the students chanted.
I was WORRIED-WORRIED-WORRIED until suddenly, George let out an unsqueakably loud noise.
‘RUM-RUM-RUM!’ he bellowed in his deep, loud voice.
And then Og did it!
He took a huge leap forward.
He leaped past George.
Then he leaped again. And again!
‘OG-OG-OG!’ the crowd cheered
‘Yay, Og!’ I squeaked. ‘I knew you could do it.’
I wasn’t sure he heard me until I heard him answer, ‘BOING-BOING-BOING-BOING!’
‘The winner is Og,’ Mr Morales said. ‘He will receive a jar of Froggy Fish Sticks from Pet-O-Rama.’
Luckily, George didn’t argue.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og twanged.
‘I want to thank you all for our very first Racing Day,’ Mr Morales said. ‘I think Longfellow School has the best classroom pets in the world.’
‘Yes!’ I squeaked.
Winky and Og were GREAT-GREAT-GREAT pets.
I tried hard to be a great pet, too.
I’m not so sure about George.
*
At the end of the day, Mrs Brisbane made an announcement.
‘This week, I haven’t assigned a student to take Humphrey home for the weekend,’ she said.
‘Eeek!’ I squeaked.
After all, I love going home with students at the weekend.
‘Instead, I’m taking Humphrey and Og home with me,’ she said. ‘They deserve a good rest.’
I love going home with Mrs Brisbane.
I love it when Og can come, too.
The day had been full of surprises, but this was the best one of all.
‘Doesn’t that sound like fun, Og?’ I squeaked to my friend.
‘BOING-BOING-BOING-BOING-BOING!’ he replied.
I knew exactly what he meant.
Author biography
Betty G. Birney worked at Disneyland and the Disney Studios, has written many children’s television shows and is the author of over forty books, including the bestselling The World According to Humphrey, which won the Richard and Judy Children’s Book Club Award, as well as a further nine books in the According to Humphrey series, and eight books in the Humphrey’s Tiny Tales series. Her work has won many awards, including an Emmy and three Humanitas Prizes. She lives in America with her husband.
The World According to Humphrey
Friendship According to Humphrey
Trouble According to Humphrey
Adventure According to Humphrey
(special publication for World Book Day 2008)
Surprises According to Humphrey
More Adventures According to Humphrey
Holidays According to Humphrey
School According to Humphrey
Mysteries According to Humphrey
Christmas According to Humphrey
Humphrey’s Big-Big-Big Book of Stories
(3 books in 1)
Hu
mphrey’s Great-Great-Great Book of Stories
(3 books in 1)
Humphrey’s Ho-Ho-Ho Book of Stories
(3 books in 1)
Humphrey’s Book of Fun-Fun-Fun
Humphrey’s Book of Summer Fun
Humphrey’s Book of Christmas Fun
Humphrey’s Ha-Ha-Ha Joke Book
Humphrey’s World of Pets
My Pet Show Panic!
My Treasure Hunt Trouble!
(special publication for World Book Day 2011)
My Summer Fair Surprise!
My Creepy-Crawly Camping Adventure!
My Great Big Birthday Bash!
My Playful Puppy Problem!
My Really Wheely Racing Day!
Bumper Book of Humphrey’s Tiny Tales 1
The Princess and the Peabodys
Copyright
First published in this collection in 2014
by Faber & Faber Limited
Bloomsbury House, 74–77 Great Russell Street, London WC1B 3DA
This ebook edition first published in 2014
My Great Big Birthday Bash!, My Treasure Hunt Trouble!,
© Betty G. Birney, 2012
Illustrations © Penny Dann, 2012
My Playful Puppy Problem!, My Really Wheely Racing Day!
© Betty G. Birney, 2013
Illustrations © Penny Dann, 2013
The right of Betty G. Birney to be identified as author of this work has been asserted in accordance with Section 77 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988
A CIP record for this book is available from the British Library
This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights, and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly
Bumper Book of Humphrey's Tiny Tales 2 Page 7
