He realized that he’d upset her. How foolish of him, how inconsiderate. He’d come home in a foul mood, and he’d put it all upon her. Alex took a deep breath. He realized that often he was lost in his own emotions and forgot to consider the feelings of others. Before he’d married it had not mattered, he could go inside of himself and think, but now he must watch this behavior more carefully.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to upset you. Yes. Something happened. I’d rather not discuss it.”
“How can you say that to me? You don’t want to discuss it? Alex please if it is distressing you, I need to know.”
“I will be all right. Just give me a few minutes.”
Alex went outside on the patio. Anna did not follow him. She just stood there, watching. What was troubling him? What could it be?
Chapter 38
Alex didn’t touch her that night as they lay in bed. This was the first night since they had been married that he had not made love to her. He lay beside her without speaking. His breathing pattern told her that he hadn’t fallen asleep. Anna did not know what to ask him, what to say, so she curled up, held her pillow, awake, and filled with worry. At close to four that morning Anna drifted off to sleep, only to awaken three hours later to the sound of the alarm. Alex was not in bed beside her.
Her head ached from lack of sleep and she felt dizzy, but she must find her husband. So Anna ran outside and searched for Alex, but he was not to be found. She didn’t want to go to work; she was too upset. She wanted to go and find Alex; he must be at his job, to yell at him, to shake him, to demand to know what was bothering him.
But she didn’t. She went to work.
Chapter 39
Anna couldn’t concentrate. She had no idea what had sent Alex into this strange silence and caused him to distance himself from her. The clients chattered at her, telling her about their lives, their husbands, the families, complaining, bragging, joking, but Anna could not hear them. Instead she just continued to nod with a frozen smile on her face.
It seemed as if the day would never end, but it did. Anna decided that she would stop and pick something up to make for dinner, something special that Alex would really like. Perhaps if she put together a romantic candlelight dinner he would open up to her. She went to the butcher and bought a roast. Then, she went to one of the street vendors and bought some potatoes. He would love this meal. Anna splurged and bought a bottle of wine and two white candles. She went home and unlocked the door. When she entered, she stood at the door stunned; the entire apartment had been ransacked. They had been robbed. Anna dropped the bags and ran through the rooms to see what the thieves took. The little bit of money that she and Alex had saved was gone, and so were the few pieces of jewelry that Anna had been given by her mother. She picked up the bag of groceries and put it down on the table. Then she sat down and wept.
After a few minutes, she shook her head. What good would it do to sit and cry? What was done was done; no use in dwelling on it. She got up, steeled herself, and began to clean up the mess the burglars had left. Then she put the roast in the oven and the potatoes too. She set the table, and lit the candles. Then she waited for Alex.
He didn’t come directly home from work. Anna opened the wine and poured herself a glass, then another. She waited until well past dark before she put the food away and went to bed, wondering if Alex would ever return.
Chapter 40
As tired, as she was she still could not sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she felt strong anxiety grip her entire being. Where had Alex gone, and why? She sat up in bed and watched the sunrise. Alex still had not returned.
In the morning, she dressed for work, her heart heavy and her head aching. She took her handbag, and then she went to the landlady’s apartment. The locks would have to be changed. Someone had broken in. She told Rosita.
The landlady agreed to take care of the problem that day.
As Anna was walking down the boulevard toward her job, Alex passed her walking toward home.
“Where have you been?”
“Walking, worrying...”
“Alex…” She shook him. “Talk to me. Tell me what happened.”
“I didn’t want to tell you I wanted to protect you, but I suppose you should know. I saw the news in the German newspaper. Hitler has invaded Poland.”
Her hand went to cover her mouth in shock and horror.
Alex took Anna in his arms and held her tight. They stood like that for a long time. Then Anna asked, “Are you hungry? I have food from last night in the ice box.”
“No, I can’t eat.”
“Neither can I,” she answered.
“Alex…”
“Yes.”
She was going to tell him that they had been robbed, but he was far too upset. Anna knew how delicate Alex could be; best to keep bad news from him right now.
“Never mind,” she said reaching up and touching his face. “I will see you tonight when I get home?”
“Yes. I’ll be here. Anna…I’m sorry, I only wanted to protect you.”
Thank God he’d come home safely, she whispered to herself as she smiled at him and squeezed his hand. “It will be all right, Alex. It will be all right.”
Two days later, on the third of September, France and Great Britain, in honor of their pact with Poland, declared war on Germany. Alex was obsessed with the German newspapers. Every morning on his way to work, and on his way home in the evening, he checked the headlines. When he arrived at home, his shoulders slumped and he sat quietly staring out the window. Anna sat beside him and took his hand.
“Do you have family in Poland?” she asked, carefully.
“Friends, people I used to know. God, how my heart goes out to them.” he said. “But that’s not even the point. “First the Studenland, now Poland? We were hoping they would fade away, but from what I can see, the Nazis are becoming even more powerful. And that is dangerous for Jews everywhere, all over the world. Who knows? Maybe here, maybe even in America.”
“I don’t understand why he invaded Poland. I thought I remembered my father saying that Hitler gave Poland a promise that he would never invade them.”
“Yes, well, a man’s word is as good as his character. And Hitler’s character is one that leaves a lot to be desired,” Alex said.
“What do you think he will do next?”
“There’s no telling. But I feel we would be the safest in the United States. And even in America, we are never completely safe. Still, I think it’s the best place. I don’t know how to get our visas, but we must get there as quickly as possible.” His eyes were wide with fear. “You can’t imagine what the Nazis can do, how cruel they can be…”
Anna had always known that whatever had happened to Alex in Dachau had made him unstable. Bad things had a more intense effect on him than they did on the average person. And once he got an idea in his head, there was no changing his mind. Right now, he was certain that they must find a way to go to America, and she knew that he was determined to do this.
Because she loved him, and longed to banish all of his demons, Anna would find a way. Whatever it took, she would get them to America.
Chapter 41
Even as a child, Anna’s parents’ friends had called her refined. She knew when to speak, and what to say. She also knew when not speak, and this won her many friends at her job at the salon.
One of the manicurists was a young woman striving to become a dancer at a posh nightclub on the Calle 23 in the Veado district. When she was hired as a chorus girl, she left the salon without notice. There was no one to cover her appointments and Claudia was distraught. She sent her daughter, a hairdresser, to the manicurist’s apartment to see why she had not come to work. When Lucia returned, she explained what had happened.
“What are we going to do? All of her customers will go to our competitor. There are a hundred other salons right here in this area; they don’t need to come here.” Claudia ran her fingers through her hair ner
vously. She shook her head and bit a nail.
“Mama, do you think Anna could do it? She is very neat and precise,” Lucia asked.
“Anna? But then who will do the shampoos? I have a full book of clients today, too,” Claudia said.
“We will all have to shampoo our own customers.”
Claudia considered the idea.
“I could teach her, quickly,” Lucia said.
“You think you could teach her before your own customers start coming in?”
“I think so. But maybe we should ask her.”
“Anna…” Claudia called.
And it was that day in early September when Anna became the most popular manicurist in the salon.
From her customers, she learned English and Spanish. She polished the fingers and toes of showgirls and wives of political officials, of Americans and Europeans, as well as natives of the island. They loved her. Anna was a good listener; she never repeated what was told to her, and for that she became their confidant.
That December, the couple who had grown up in Germany with cold winters sat outside, lighting the inexpensive menorah that Alex had bought. It was 70 degrees outside, on their first Hanukah together.
They clasped hands as Alex said the prayers.
“Blessed are you, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, who has sanctified us with Your commandments, and has commanded us to kindle the lights of Hanukkah...”
She looked over at her handsome husband wearing the yarmulke she’d made for him.
Anna squeezed Alex’s hand and he looked at her, his eyes shining with gratitude for all he’d been given.
After the candles had been, lit Anna served a dinner of potato latkes. It had been such a long time since they’d eaten Jewish food.
“You even got apple sauce,” Alex said.
“I made it from apples and sugar.”
“It’s delicious.”
“I’m glad you like it. I’ve been serving you so much rice and beans that I almost forgot how to prepare our food.”
“Well, you remembered quite well…and by the way…”
“Yes?” She ate a forkful of applesauce and potato pancake.
“Wait here.”
Alex got up and went to the other room. He took a small box out of his pants pocket, “Happy Hanukkah, my sweetheart.”
“Alex, we agreed we were not going to buy gifts. We agreed that we were going to save our money.” She held the box.
“This is from my lunch money. I saved it to buy this for you.”
She felt the tears. “Oh Alex. I wish I had gotten you something too.”
“You give me something every day. You give me a reason to live,” he said.
She looked at him and shook her head, smiling through her tears. “Alex...”
“Open it…come on. I’ve been waiting for two weeks to give this to you. It was hard to keep the surprise. I was so excited that I wanted to give it to you as soon as I got it.”
She pulled the lid off the small white box. Inside was a thin gold band, encased in black velvet.
“I had it engraved,” he said. “Look inside.”
She felt the tears running down her cheeks as she read the script “For Anna, my love, my life, my salvation.”
“Alex…”
“Here give it me. Let me put it on you.”
She handed him the band. “Are you sure we can afford this?” she asked.
He didn’t answer.
“With this ring, I thee wed,” he said, his hand trembling as he slipped the ring on her small finger, “For richer or poorer.”
“In sickness and in health,” she said, the words catching in her throat with emotion.
“For ever and for always…till death do us part.” Alex kissed her hand and held it to his cheek. “Happy Hanukah, Anna, my Anna…”
“Happy Hanukah.” She kissed him.
Chapter 42
Over the next eight months, Alex and Anna learned to speak Spanish almost fluently through daily conversations with the natives, and English fairly well from books Alex purchased. They set aside the waltz, which they’d brought with them from Germany, to learn the bolero-sun, a hot rhythmic dance, much like the rumba. Even though Raul was much older than he was, Alex made friends with the man, and he and his wife occasionally went dancing with Alex and Anna. However, Alex and Anna tried to save every penny that they could. With an uncertain future such as theirs, money could be a safety net. If they had enough, and could make the right connections, they might be able to buy the visas to America. Still, they both knew that they might never leave Cuba, that for reasons beyond their control they might never see the United States. They had discussed this. It upset Alex more than Anna. He felt that, in America, Jews would be safe. However, both of them had become acclimated to their lives in the tropical paradise. There was no doubt that they were surrounded by beauty, not only not only in the old city, but also just a few miles away in the new city. Alex missed his career; he missed his love affair with words. He’d become fast and efficient at rolling cigars, but he longed to go back to journalism. And Anna secretly yearned to finish her education. But for now these were dreams, and with all that the Jews faced in Europe, they considered themselves fortunate to be earning enough money to live and even put a little away with hopes for a future.
Every month a letter arrived from Uncle Max, and sometimes another from Aunt Edith. They were doing what they could to obtain the Visas, but so far they were being shuffled around without any concrete answers.
Alex began going to the library. He wanted to learn to read and write in English. He read books written in English, and began writing his own critiques on them. Words had always been his strongest allies, and he planned to use them to convince the Americans to approve their visas. And if not, he would try to find a job in the new city working as a writer for one of the tourist papers.
On most Sundays, Alex and Anna packed a picnic basket and walked through the park or along the ocean. They splurged and bought second-hand bathing suits so that they could feel the warm salt water upon their skin. Alex had lost the pale, chalky-white pallor he’d had when he first arrived, replacing it with a healthy bronze glow. Anna, too, had been kissed by the sun. The sunshine and good food helped Alex to regain his health. He gained weight and his body filled out. To look at him, no one would ever know he’d been starved and tortured in Dachau.
For Alex and Anna, every day their love only grew stronger, and spending every night wrapped in each other’s arms was the true highlight of their lives. The landlady gave Anna a box fan, and at night they listened to the hum and the chirping of the crickets. Anna lay with her head on Alex’s chest, gazing out at the full moon.
“Sometimes I wish that we could have a child,” she said. They had taken great care not to conceive.
“I know you do, and so do I, but I don’t think we should until we know what is going to happen with our visas. If we have a baby they might not let us in to America.”
“Do you care so much about leaving here and going to America?”
“Yes and no,” he said. “I love it here. It’s beyond beautiful, but I am afraid that if we stay in Cuba, we will always be poor. And this country is small, not nearly as safe; its government isn’t as reliable as the United States. We are Jews, Anna. We must never forget that if there is trouble, Jews are the first ones that they go after. Besides, there is so much opportunity in America. There, I can work hard and give you the life you deserve.”
“If that is what you really want, I am going to start asking my customers if they can do anything to help us get our visas,” Anna said.
“You mean to tell me that you have not asked them?”
“No…” she said, “I’m sorry.”
‘You don’t want to leave?”
“It’s not that. It’s just that I am comfortable. I feel secure. Our lives are what they are, but at least we know what to expect. After the ship and everything we went through to get here...”
&n
bsp; “I know. I know,” he said, kissing the top of her head.
“In America, we will be starting all over again, not knowing where to go or what to expect…” she said.
He nodded. “It’s beautiful here, and I am comfortable too. But after what happened in Germany, I’ve learned never to become too comfortable. America, in my mind, is still the safest place for us. The government is stable, Anna…”
“I sent a letter to my parents several months ago. They still have not answered.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I didn’t want to upset you. I kept waiting, thinking that the letter would come the following day…” Her voice cracking with concern, “It didn’t…”
“But you are upset? If you are upset, you should always turn to me. You know that I’m here for you. Even if there is nothing I can do to help, I will always listen. Oh, Anna, my Anna…” Alex picked up her hand and kissed her palm.
“Do you think they are all right?” she asked.
“Yes, of course they are,” he said, but he knew that he didn’t sound convincing.
“I am afraid for them. Before I left they begged me to write, and promised that they would write too. But they haven’t, Alex.”
“Do you think it might have been the mail? Maybe they never received it. Why don’t you write again?” he said.
“I will try. I’ll write tomorrow.”
“That’s a good idea.” He said a silent prayer that her parents were safe, but after what he’d been through in Dachau, he doubted it.
Chapter 43
Alex followed the news coming out of Germany every day and Anna could see how worried he was. Cuba had its own problems with anti-Semitism, and she knew that Alex was afraid that the Nazis would infiltrate the government there. It was well known that many of Hitler’s SS came to Cuba on holiday. They were accepted, and even welcomed. She decided that it was probably a good idea to start asking some of the officials’ wives if they could help her and Alex get their visas.
The Voyage: A Historical Novel set during the Holocaust, inspired by real events Page 9
