The heat I feel on my cheeks says a blush is working its way up my neck, but surprisingly I’m okay with it. Caleb Harrison can embarrass me any day. “You ready?” he asks, reaching out for my hand.
“Sure am,” I clasp our fingers together as we take off into the soggy mid-morning weather.
“Ya know I like rain like this. A soft drizzle, coating the streets, washing everything new again.” He holds onto me tighter as I step down from the curb and we cross the street.
Downtown Calvert City looks like it could have been plucked from any postcard in the nineteen fifties. Mom and Pop shops have their doors open, even though the weather is wet and cool. Many of them have cider available or hot cocoa as we browse through their wares.
“I like this too,” I admit, entwining my fingers in his. “A nice, steady, drizzle, it’s my favorite. I have a tin roof on my duplex and I was listening to it come down this morning before you came to get me. It’s the most relaxing sound.” I turn him toward a small store I’ve been to a few times. “Over here, they have the best shampoo for curly hair. She handmakes it and it’s got essential oils in it that curly hair needs. If I hadn’t run out, my hair wouldn’t look so insane today.” I touch my braid with my free hand.
“Not insane, kinda cute.” He tugs on the end of the braid. “I like this look on you.”
When he smiles, the hint of a dimple shows on his left cheek, and I can’t help but smile back. “Whatever you say,” I laugh.
When we walk inside, he separates, looking at some of the stuff this shop has for men. He picks up some moisturizing oil I bought my dad not long ago. “I got that for my dad to use instead of aftershave.” I glance at the bottle to make sure it’s the right one. “Yeah, this one, and he loves it. Says it doesn’t dry his face out, and it smells like the beach.” I pick up another one. “I liked this one too; it smells a little spicier, sexier than the one I gave my dad.”
I reach over, grab the bottle and lift it up to Caleb’s nose. The hint of teakwood is enough to make me inhale deeply as I bring it under mine next.
It’s one of my favorite scents, and I’d love to smell it on him.
“You like the way this smells, huh?”
“Yeah.” I nod, blushing again. “Huge turn-on.” I smack my hand over my mouth as I realize what I’ve just said. It’s a little too early in whatever this is to be talking about turn-off’s and turn-on’s, but there’s something about this guy and his deep brown eyes that makes me just want to keep talking.
A slow grin spreads across his face. “Is that right?”
“Ruby, I got your shampoo and conditioner.” The cashier and part-owner of the store yells from across the room.
Saved by the bell, I turn around, thankfully hiding myself from his direct gaze to go and purchase what I need. When I feel him stand behind me, I turn around and get the bottle of oil. “Add this to it too.” Deciding to go for broke, I am as direct as I can. “I’m the one who wants to smell it on your neck, I might as well be the one to pay for it.”
His eyes darken when I lick my suddenly dry lips and I wonder just what the hell I’m doing. This direct person isn’t me. Typically I play coy, make a guy chase me, and in the end, I push them away because they come on too strong and suffocate me. But this guy? Maybe I want to chase him a little bit, maybe I’m feeling like it could be mutual, and when he catches me, I want him to take me. I want him to show me what I’ve been missing with these college guys, because there is no doubt in my mind, as I watch his big hand grab his bag, he’s a man.
We walk back out into the weather, this time quieter with one another, but there’s a tension that wasn’t there before. It’s not unwelcome. It’s a string of sexual awareness we didn’t have when we’d walked in. I can’t even bring myself to regret I created the tension there, because I’ve never gone after what I want before. This will be the first time and hopefully it won’t be a bust.
“You wanna head back?” I tilt my head toward his Jeep.
He pulls his phone out of his pocket and glances at the time. “We should, even though I’m having a really good time with you. I do need to get that nap in. If not, I won’t be worth shit tonight.”
The whole way back to my apartment, I grapple with what I want to ask. I want to see him again, but I’ve never been the type of woman to be forward. To ask the guy out on the date, more for fear that I’ll get shot down, but I’m worried I’ll let this moment pass me by.
Caleb takes the decision out of my hands, when he pulls up to my duplex and cuts the ignition. “I’d like to see you again, the next couple of days might be a little crazy for me after the weather we’ve had, so can we plan something for Friday night? Would that be okay with you?”
Inside my heart is pounding, I want to jump up and down and give the finger to the part of my personality that always expects the worst. But I don’t, I keep it together. “Sounds good, what do you want to do?”
“We can check out the new bar, if that’s okay?”
Recently a brewery opened up a few streets over from The Café, boasting its own bar. I’ve wanted to check it out, but I never wanted to go by myself. “Text me the time, when you get your schedule?”
We’re staring at one another, so badly I want to lean over the seat and kiss him. Press my lips to his and know exactly what it feels like.
“What the hell,” he mumbles as he takes the decision out of my hands once again, grasping my neck in his palm and pulling me close. His lips are soft as they coax mine open. His tongue tastes like the syrup he had on his pancakes and there’s a hint of the coffee he drank. I moan softly in the back of my throat, wishing the console didn’t separate us. When he pulls away, we’re both breathing slightly faster than we were before.
“I gotta go.” His voice is husky.
Mine is partially breathless. “That nap, huh?”
“Yeah.” He sounds as if he regrets his job at this moment. “I’ll text you though?”
“I’d like that a lot.”
“Let me walk you.” He makes to get out, but I stop him.
“Nah, I like to run.” I give him a grin.
Getting out of the Jeep, I run to the front porch, dodging puddles as I go. He waits until I open the door and wave at him. As I make it safely inside, I can’t help but feel like today was a life changer.
CHAPTER FIVE
Ruby
Sunday morning service is a tradition in my family, has been since I was a little kid. I’m not particularly religious, but even if you aren’t, you’re still expected to make an appearance.
“I promise, Mom, I’m fine!” I assure my mom for probably the nineteenth time since I showed up this morning. “The cop who helped me was nice, and there’s nothing to worry about. He took me home, took care of everything, and made sure I didn’t have to be scared. You don’t have to worry.”
“I’m just not used to you living on your own,” she worries, pushing my hair back, out of my face. “It’s an adjustment period for us, I’m not trying to crowd you, but please remember, you’re still our little girl.”
I want to tell her I’ve been on my own a while. When I was in college no one was there to make sure I came home at a decent hour, to make sure I went to class, or that I ate at a certain time. Funny how that worked out. I even had to make sure I did my own laundry. There was no one there to do that either. Moving back here has partially suffocated me, because now I have a whole family who’s worried about me constantly. I know I should appreciate it, but at the same time, it’s starting to get annoying.
“You were introduced to him from someone you work with?” my dad asks as he comes to stand next to us, resting his hands in his slacks pockets. “You didn’t meet him off of one of those dating sites, did you, Ruby? That’s so dangerous. I hope you have a better head on your shoulders than that.”
Jesus Christ. All I want to do is get out of here, and away from the inquisition. If they think all of these things about me, how do they think I managed to make i
t through college? It’s almost as if they still see me as a teenager.
“I promise I met him through a co-worker. I don’t even have a profile on those sites, Dad, and believe it or not, I managed to take care of myself for almost five years and get a degree. I’m good!” I try to hold the irritation out of my voice, but I don’t quite manage it.
My mom looks like she wants to say more, but wisely keeps it to herself. “I know we’re a little overbearing, but you’re our only daughter.”
I’ve heard this my entire life. My older brother, Lance, could legit go impregnate the entire town and they would throw a celebration party, but me? I should have sensibilities. It makes me wonder what they would say if they knew I’ve thought about Caleb since he left, wondered what would have happened if I’d been bold enough to invite him in yesterday.
“You coming over to the house for lunch?” Dad asks as he and Mom start walking to their car.
“Not today, I have a lot of papers to grade, laundry to do and all that adult stuff.”
I want to roll my eyes, but I keep from it. One day. One day they’ll see me as the capable person I am. Education isn’t the easiest program to go through, and I did it, graduating with honors. But nobody ever said anything about that, nope. Seems like they never will either.
As I wave goodbye to them, I get in my car, taking my hair down from where it’s pinned up. Driving through town, I stop at one of the three fast food places we have, and as I pull out, I see a Laurel Springs cop car blowing past, lights blazing. I wonder if that’s Caleb, or his dad. According to the text he sent this morning, he’s working a double today, and as I see the car navigate traffic, see people not get out of the way when they should, my heart is in my throat. I’ve never had anyone I care about have a job where they could get hurt. This is going to take some getting used to.
* * *
Sunday night grading papers has never been my idea of a fun time, so when my cell buzzes, I hope it’s Caleb. I know that he’s what they call on-shift, and because of the crazy amounts of rain we’ve had, they’re dealing with flooding. I don’t think I ever realized the hours other professions put in. He had to do a double today after working the late shift on Saturday. No wonder he naps when he can. I’d be a walking zombie if someone had me mixing up my days and nights like that. What I don’t expect to see is Karina sending me a message.
K: I heard through the grapevine you had a problem with the date that Trinity set you up on. My son was there to save the day?
R: Yeah, it was a hot mess in front of everyone at The Café. I’ll explain to Principal Taggert tomorrow morning, just in case. It was really embarrassing, but your son did save me. You should have heard how that conversation went he told me you’re his mom.
K: Ha! I bet there was a lot of explaining going on. I’m glad he was there though, I just wanted to check on you. See you tomorrow!
As I say my goodbyes to Karina, I throw my phone on my coffee table. I haven’t seen Caleb since we parted ways yesterday. I’m not even sure how late he’s working today.
What I am sure of is that I want to see him again. Tucking my lip between my teeth and going to sit on my couch, I send a text with my heart in my throat.
R: How was your day?
My hands shake as I wait for him to answer, and I wonder if this is the newness of our relationship, or if this is the guy I’ll have this with for the rest of my life. I don’t have the experience to know which is which, but what I do know is I like it. I like the fluttery feeling in my stomach, and I like the fact that he’s the one to give it to me.
Cruise
I’m cold, wet, fucking hungry, and really done with this goddamn day when I get the text from Ruby asking how my day is going. For a few brief minutes I don’t answer it. I contemplate lying to her, telling her it’s been a good one, and then forgetting she even made the attempt to text. Then I look at my team, realize that every single one of them has had a shitty day too, and they have women at home they care about. They lay those problems down at the feet of the women they share their lives with. They don’t sugar coat shit, they’re partners in the ways that matter, and I know that if I want this to go anywhere with Ruby, we’ve got to be partners.
C: Really fuckin’ shitty. I can’t talk about it right now, and I might not be able to text the rest of the night, but I want to see you. Soon.
“Where the fuck did this shit wash up from?” Havoc stands to his full height from his crouched position. He’s got his hands on his hips, looking down at a crate full of moonshine.
Over the past few years, we’ve almost eradicated the illegal sale and distribution of the shit that kills people. We’ve made huge strides and we’ve worked diligently with the state and county to get this shit off the street. This? This is a kick in the gut.
We responded to a call that said water had run over Pond Creek Road, and when we got here, that wasn’t a lie. What we didn’t expect to find were about five cases of moonshine floating for anyone to take. “You think it was hidden somewhere?” I crouch down to get a better look at it.
The bottles look old, reminiscent of the night when a friend of mine died after drinking a bad batch. To this day I can’t look at glass bottles like this and not relive portions of that night. Most everything we see these days is in some fancy bottle, not many people embrace the old ways anymore. Just looking at it makes me shiver, gets me emotional, and makes me wonder what he’d be doing now. Would he be working with us? Would he have a family? That’s the shit that sometimes keeps me up at night.
“It’s got mud caked on it.” Dad comes over to us. “But if it was in that creek bed, I mean it could have happened during the flood.” He runs a hand through his hair. “What makes you think it’s old?” He looks at Havoc, questioning the same thing I am.
“Don’t know.” He shakes his head. “A hunch maybe? This isn’t the product we’ve seen around here the past few years.”
“If you wanna get technical, we ain’t seen this product since Jefferson went to jail. We can send it off for testing, see where it came from,” Dad throws the suggestion out there. “For the most part we’ve eradicated production like this. If it comes into this town, it comes from out of state. We all know that.”
“Jefferson’s in jail,” I protest. “He’s still got a few more years left on his sentence, and Brooks is straight and narrow now. I mean he’s not gonna fuck up what he’s got with Trinity.” Everyone who’s seen them together and knows how happy they are knows he’s not going to mess it up. He’s worked hard to have a stable life; I don’t see him doing anything to ever fuck it up again.
Havoc gazes out over the raging creek that’s rushed it’s banks and now sits over the road. “Doesn’t mean he hasn’t taught someone else on the inside and then instructed them on what to do once they got out. I don’t know, I don’t like the feel of this. Maybe he had all that stashed, and somebody was waiting for it to be found.”
“I think you’re paranoid.” Dad claps him on the shoulder, leveling with his friend. “I think you’re looking for something that isn’t there. I mean we can investigate it, don’t get me wrong, but don’t let it consume your life. Things are going well for you and Leigh right now.”
“That’s why I’m worried about it. I don’t want anything to mess up what we’ve got.” He runs a hand over his mouth, almost like he can’t believe he let the words come out. He and Leighton have been through hell and back with her family, and I completely understand why he’s worried, but I’m with Dad; I don’t think it’s a source for concern at this point.
“Don’t let shit like this in your head and it won’t.”
I’m watching the two of them, constantly amazed at how their friendship works. Forever impressed with the way they speak to one another and how they take each other’s feelings into account, even when they don’t agree with one another. That’s the way mine and Morgan’s friendship works, only we don’t have a job together. Sometimes I’m thankful for that, because we do get
a little shitty with one another now and again.
“So what do you want us to do with it?” I turn to Havoc for instruction. Ace and I found it when we responded, so it’s up to us to take care of it.
“Take it to evidence, send off some to the state lab, and see what they come back with. Once the water recedes, we’ll come out here and see if there are any clues or anything left. Right now you’ve worked nineteen hours straight, kid. Go home and get some sleep.”
He’s right, and I’m dead on my feet, but as I walk to my squad car, I realize I don’t want to go home to my empty apartment. I want to go to Ruby’s, have someone to talk to about this day. I wonder what she’d say if I laid my worries and my tiredness down at her feet. Would she make me dinner and put me to bed? Would she lay with me until I fall sleep? After long shifts like this, I sometimes have a really hard time turning my brain off. As evidenced by how it’s running a mile a minute right now.
I wonder what the answers are to all these questions. Would she be the person who holds me when I can’t sleep through the night? I want the answer, want it badly.
But tonight the answer won’t come. School is in session tomorrow, and all I need to do is crash.
CHAPTER SIX
Ruby
“I’m so sorry!”
As soon as I walk into the library on Monday morning after going to see Principal Taggert, the apology is already coming from Trinity’s mouth.
“I had no idea Seth was like that. We’ve known each other a while, he was my next door neighbor.” She runs to me, enveloping me in a hug. “Brooks always says I’m too trusting, but I just never imagined he would be like that. And to think I could have gotten you hurt. I’m really, really sorry, Ruby.”
“It’s okay,” I assure her. “All’s well that ends well. I ended up having a great time anyway.”
“It’s all over town, that you left with Caleb.”
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