razorsedge

by Lisanne Norman

  Lijou’s ears flicked to emphasize his affirmative. “He really is fine. He needs to see to matters of a spiritual nature, nothing more, I assure you. T’Chebbi will contact you when it’s time to return.”

  The call over, Kusac returned to the bedroom.

  “So Noni was right,” said Carrie. “Kaid is finally healing. Now, what shall we do with this extra time together?”

  Kusac began to kiss her, sliding his hands down her sides till he was holding her bottom. I know what I want to do now.

  Tomorrow?

  See our friends, and the rest of my family, he replied, tipping her down onto her back, his tail snaking round her leg.

  Chapter 10

  It had been five weeks since he’d last visited the temple and he had no idea what had prompted him to come now. Curiosity? A desire to see if Vartra the God would speak to him again? He pulled open the door and waited for T’Chebbi to precede him. He’d rushed her so much that she only had enough time to dress, nothing more, so her hair remained an unbound cloud of browns, golds, and grays that reached down almost to her waist. As she passed him, he reached out to touch it. She stopped to look up at him, puzzled by the gesture.

  He shrugged and followed her inside. Stopping, he inhaled the aromatic air, taking comfort from the familiar scent of the incense. Torches cast flickering shadows that were almost old friends to him. It was good to be back in the environment that had once been a home to him. He must be getting old if such things suddenly meant so much.

  “Not old, just in need of comfort as we all are at certain times in our lives.” Father Lijou’s voice came from the shadows at the far end of the main aisle. “It’s good to see you back again, Tallinu.”

  As the Guild Master stepped out from behind a pillar, Kaid began to walk toward him. The glow from the braziers flanking the statue of Vartra turned the streaks of white on the priest’s face and ear tips golden. The color of Kashini’s pelt, and her mother’s hair, he thought, realizing as he did that his mind was straying into irrelevancies.

  “Not irrelevancies,” said Lijou as he stopped in front of him. “Sometimes, during the hours of darkness, we can see what truly matters. The light of day often blinds us to what is in front of our noses all along. What brings you here this late, Tallinu?”

  “A visit, nothing more, Father Lijou,” Kaid said. “Don’t read more into it than there is.”

  “I would never do that, Tallinu.” He reached out to take Kaid by the arm, drawing him away from the central area. “Let’s go somewhere quieter.”

  They walked between the pillars, toward the side wall where the entrance to the largest of the shrines was housed.

  “Ghyakulla,” said Kaid, blinking as he followed Lijou through the narrow doorway. The light in the Goddess’ shrine was blinding after the dimness of the main temple.

  Lijou led him to a small wooden seat, its back set against the raw rock face. “Did Father Jyarti ever bring you here? This is one of my favorite places for meditating.”

  “A few times,” Kaid admitted, sitting down and looking round the chamber. Concealed lamps that duplicated sunlight illuminated the shrine, nourishing the plants and allowing them to thrive within their rocky womb. “He said it wasn’t time for me to know the Goddess yet.”

  Beneath his feet, the carpet of grass that covered the cavern floor felt warm. Around him, bushes and rare plants bloomed, their flowers a delight to the senses. A movement of air brought the subtle scent of the nung blossom to his nostrils. He turned his head till he could see the gnarled tree standing in pride of place on a small grass-covered rise. Memories of the day he’d gone to Noni for help for Carrie came back sharply to him. The nung tree had been in bloom then, too.

  “We’re lucky to have a shrine such as this,” said Lijou. “Only Ghyakulla’s own temple has one better. The rest are merely painted rooms or chambers. I never could understand how one could worship the Goddess of Shola in a place that was not full of Her living creations. How do the Humans worship their Goddess?”

  “Their Goddess doesn’t have a formal cult,” said Kaid absently as he looked around for the source of the running water. It hadn’t been there when he’d last visited. “Just people like Derwent.”

  “Surely not. No Goddess could be so impoverished, I’m sure.”

  “Carrie left Earth when she was but a kitling, Father Lijou,” said Kaid, finally catching sight of the small stream that issued from under a rocky overhang to his right. “According to Derwent, their planet has lost touch with the world of the Green Goddess.”

  “Ah, that explains how someone like him came about. Perhaps, when they are ready, we have more to teach them than they think. I come here often. The sound of water soothes my soul like nothing else can. As I said, we’re fortunate indeed to be able to enjoy a taste of summer all the year round in our windswept mountains.”

  “It reminds me of the Wilderness on board the Khalossa.”

  “The Wilderness? I suppose it does, in a way. Just don’t let illusion become confused with reality, Tallinu.”

  Kaid swung his head round to look at the priest, frowning. “Illusion?”

  “The Wilderness exists to entertain; this does not. It teaches us many things about life if we can but sit and listen and watch.”

  A flash of light caught his eye. Kaid turned his head to see what it was, but all he could see was the rock face. He looked back at Lijou. “What lessons are you speaking of, Father?”

  Lijou raised an eye ridge. “You ask me that when you’ve learned so many of them? You disappoint me, Tallinu.”

  Again the flash of light, and again, when he turned to look, he could see nothing.

  “What do you see?”

  “Something shining,” said Kaid, forcing his attention back to the Head Priest.

  “Then go and see what it is.”

  Their eyes met. “It’s an illusion,” said Kaid. “A flicker of light, nothing more.”

  “As you say,” agreed Lijou, beginning to get to his feet. “The restrictions on you entering the temple are lifted, Tallinu. You may come and go whenever you wish.”

  Kaid hardly heard what he said. Something in the rock face was catching his attention and he needed to know what it was. He felt a hand on his shoulder and started in surprise.

  “You’ve been looking at the same piece of rock face for the last five minutes,” said Lijou gently. “Why not go over and see what it is?”

  Kaid hesitated, then, getting to his feet, he began to walk toward it. The grass was slightly damp and as he moved across it, the scent of the warm, rich earth rose around him. Reaching the chamber wall, he stooped to look down at the rock face.

  “Nothing,” he said, fingers going to probe at it in disbelief. “It was nothing!”

  “Look again, Tallinu,” said Lijou from the doorway.

  Extending his claws, Kaid scraped away at the lichen and loose debris. Within moments, he’d exposed a small, blue-white crystal, still embedded in the living wall of the Dzahai Mountains. “A crystal! How could I possibly have seen it from where we sat?” he asked, gently rubbing his fingertips over the planes as he looked over at Lijou.

  “Yet you knew it was there, hidden within the rock,” said the priest. “I think it’s time you visited Guardian Dhaika at the Retreat, Tallinu.”

  Kaid straightened up. “Why?”

  “The Guardian will tell you, my friend. Come to me tomorrow morning and I’ll arrange for you to visit him. You needn’t take Sister T’Chebbi with you unless you wish to,” he added as he left the chamber.

  Thoughtfully Kaid turned back to the crystal, giving it one last rub before he, too, left the shrine.

  T’Chebbi was waiting for him by the main doors. “Father Lijou said my job is over.”

  Kaid nodded. “I go to the Retreat tomorrow. I’m to see Guardian Dhaika.” He watched her, wanting to see what her reaction would be. Even so, he almost missed the slight relaxing of her ears and their immediate recovery. She didn’t want
to leave.

  “You may come if you wish,” he said.

  She shrugged and began to turn away. “When do we leave?”

  *

  Lijou headed straight for the night desk, requesting that the duty messenger meet him in his office immediately. He’d no sooner sat down than the Brother was scratching at his door.

  “Take this to Noni,” Lijou said, handing him a portable comm unit. “Apologize for disturbing her at this hour, then give her the note. If she doesn’t let you in, suggest it. Set this up on her table, dial into Stronghold, then leave. Understand?”

  The Brother nodded once, picked up the comm unit, and left.

  “Damned cloak-and-dagger stuff,” Lijou muttered.

  “What is?” asked Kha’Qwa as she pushed his office door open. “What’s happening that’s so important it can’t wait till morning?”

  “Kaid. Noni wanted to know immediately he was ready to go to the Retreat.”

  “Ready to go? To do what?” she asked, going over to his less formal seats and curling up in one of them.

  “It’s one of our rituals. Not everyone is suitable. In fact, very few are, but Tallinu is.”

  “What ritual?”

  “Ghyakulla’s.”

  “Ghyakulla? I know she’s both mother and consort to Vartra, but I’ve never heard of anyone doing a ritual of hers here at Stronghold. Which ritual do you mean?”

  “Some rituals are known only to senior members of the Brotherhood, Kha’Qwa. It’s a dream time one. When I heard that Tallinu had actually escaped from his body during his captivity, I knew that one day he’d need to take the ritual. It’ll help center him, give him the strength he now needs to complete his healing.”

  “If he’s still feeling betrayed by Vartra, then how will a ritual involving Ghyakulla help?”

  “I met him in the temple not an hour ago. He chose to go there. Trust me, Kha’Qwa, this is my field. He’s ready to meet Ghyakulla.”

  “Meet? How can he meet Her?” Her voice was high-pitched with surprise.

  “Ah, well, I suppose you ought not to know,” he mumbled, avoiding her gaze. “But I need someone to share these burdens with! Yes, there are such rituals, and yes, I’ve taken some of them in my time. Who can say who it is you meet on these dream walks. I choose to believe it is Ghyakulla.”

  “How many have taken this particular ritual?”

  “Not many,” he admitted. “I have. It does involve some danger. People have been lost in the dream worlds and been unable to return, just like those we lost in the Margins rituals.”

  “Is it wise for him to try this so soon after his trip to the Margins?”

  “He must. He’s been called by Ghyakulla Herself.”

  “How do you know?”

  “I was there, Kha’Qwa,” he said gently, getting up and going to join her. “He saw the light in Ghyakulla’s shrine shining off a crystal set in the rock face. I saw nothing till he’d scraped off the lichen and muck that covered it.”

  “Good grief. I’m sorry, Lijou. I shouldn’t have doubted you, but we seem to be suddenly living in such active times! There were always one or two who heard the Gods, and if you looked, you could sometimes see their hands at work in your life, but now… They’re so active!”

  “Think of them as the spirits of our ancestors, and remember that we went back in time to disturb them. Doesn’t their intervention seem less fantastic?”

  “I suppose,” she agreed dubiously.

  The comm beeped, calling him back to his desk.

  “He was fast,” said Kha’Qwa with a sigh, pulling her robe more firmly about herself.

  “Aircar,” said Lijou shortly, turning the unit on.

  “You’d better have a damned good reason for hauling me out of my bed in the middle of the night,” Noni said, ears lying sideways in anger.

  “You wanted to know immediately when the Goddess called him, Noni,” said Lijou. “You were most specific. Immediately, you said.”

  Her ears lifted. “Already? By Vartra, when I get it right, I really get it right,” she muttered. “What’d you do? What’d you tell him?”

  “I’m sending him to the Retreat for a few days to see the Guardian. I hope that fits in with what you wanted, because that’s what he’s doing.”

  “Fine, fine. You did well, Master Lijou,” she said. “And you were right to disturb me. Now tell that lad of yours to get back in here and take this contraption away with him.”

  “It stays, Noni. Please do me the courtesy of keeping it there. It makes communications between us much easier.”

  “I told you, I hate these damned…” She stopped in mid-flow and regarded him for a moment. “It can stay,” she said abruptly. “You and that young mate of yours get back to bed and let an old woman get some sleep. Goodnight.”

  Taken aback by the suddenness of her capitulation, Lijou stared at the blank screen for a moment before turning it off.

  “That’s it?” asked Kha’Qwa. “Nothing more? No Üxwexplanation?”

  He shook his head. “We won’t get one either. Not till it’s over, and then only if we’re lucky.”

  *

  Within an hour, Noni, accompanied by her assistant Teusi, was waiting in Guardian Dhaika’s private lounge.

  “Noni, what in the God’s name are you doing here at this hour?” Dhaika demanded, then stopped, catching sight of Teusi. “By your leave, Noni. Teusi, fetch some hot c’shar for us, please.” He waited till the youth had left before continuing. “When does he arrive?”

  “Tomorrow morning. Lijou dragged me from my bed, so I didn’t see why you should get to sleep on undisturbed.” She grinned an evil grin. “Remember, don’t teach him how to dream walk alone.”

  Dhaika sat down. “I have to if the Goddess has called him, Noni, no matter what’s been decided.”

  “You’d turn your back on the Council? Knowing what it could cost us— could cost Shola?” she demanded.

  “You tread your own path all the time, Noni,” he retorted angrily. “You ignored the ruling on noninvolvement with the Human female! Don’t talk to me about my duty! My duty is also to this Retreat, to the God, and Goddess!”

  “I’m not saying neglect the Goddess!” she snapped. “Take him there, let him meet Her! Just don’t let him take the ritual! It’s too soon. We need them all, not just him, Dhaika. Shola needs an En’Shalla Triad as Guardians!”

  He remained silent, glowering across the space that separated them.

  “Let Ghyakulla decide, if you prefer it put that way,” she sighed. “The rituals are ours, our way of understanding the entities. All you are being asked to do is not to teach him how to dream walk.”

  “All, Noni? When did the Council ask for a small matter? Believe me, this is nothing small they are demanding! This touches on the heart of my faith, what I believe in and stand for!”

  “Then trust Her to know what She wants to do! If She wants him taught to walk, She’ll do it, right? His mind is beginning to heal. A shock like this could unhinge him. He needs to bind himself more tightly to his Triad first. This is not the time for leaps of faith. One step at a time, Dhaika. Let him meet Her, feel Her power, understand Her Link to Vartra first.”

  “If he needs to be more tightly bound to them, why haven’t you seen to it? You’re always meddling in other people’s affairs!”

  “Because last time, I leaned too hard, I admit it,” she said, her voice suddenly quiet and tired. “This time, he needs to do it himself. He went to the temple for the first time tonight. If you push him into this too soon, we could lose him altogether. He could turn his back on us all. Do what the Council asks, Dhaika.”

  “Demands, more like,” he snorted. “You know the Council usually does what you want, and the odd time it doesn’t, you do it anyway!”

  “No one is ordering you. You’re the one in charge here.”

  “There are Guardians and Guardians, as you well know, Noni!”

  “Yes. There are, aren’t there?” H
er voice was like ice. “It is well within the purview of our Council to ask you to do a lesser ritual and let the Goddess decide, and you know that.”

  “I wasn’t even at the meeting when this was decided!”

  “It wasn’t our fault you were at your granddaughter’s Validation. Your protests have all been recorded, don’t worry. If not for the Council, do it because at the end of the day, the Goddess can look after Herself, and Kaid Tallinu can’t. He’d be out of his depth in this.”

  “Don’t tell me that finally someone has come along who matters more than all your plottings and schemings,” he said, the incredulity obvious in his voice. “I don’t believe it!”

  “Stop gloating,” she snapped, leaning forward on her stick. “Whatever you do or don’t think you know, you know nothing!”

  “I’ll do it, Noni. Not for you or the Council, for him. For Kaid Tallinu, the cub who appeared out of nowhere on my doorstep forty-odd years ago!”

  “Do it for whatever reasons you like,” she said, leaning back in the chair and closing her eyes, “just say you’ll do it, then we can all get back to bed.”

  *

  Rezac heard footsteps in the corridor outside. Turning his head, he saw Goran enter. “We’ve got a job on tonight, and I need your people to help,” Goran said, taking his stim twig out of his mouth. “I’m taking the outdoor patrol with me, so your security will be down to the people inside the monastery until we get back.”

  “Job?” said Vartra, his brows meeting in a frown. “What job? My people are here to be protected, not risked in guerrilla fights.”

  “That Jaisa girl of yours. Got a message that her family’s back and the Valtegans are doing a raid on their area tonight. We need to get in first and pull them out, but we need more people. I haven’t enough, and there’s no time to wait for another cell to arrive.”

  “It’s nearly mealtime!” said Vartra.

  “Better that way. Less to go wrong if you get hit on an empty stomach,” said Rezac.

  “What’s going on?” demanded Zashou as she and Jaisa came in. “Wh…”

  “Sit down and listen and you might find out,” said Rezac.