by Eugène Sue
CHAPTER XLV. THE BLOCKHEAD
We have stated that Marshal Simon occupied a small house in the Ruedes Trois-Freres. Two o'clock in the afternoon had just struck in themarshal's sleeping-chamber, a room furnished with military simplicity.In the recess, in which stood the bed, hung a trophy composed of thearms used by the marshal during his campaigns. On the secretary oppositewas a small bronze bust of the emperor, the only ornament of theapartment. Out of doors the temperature was far from warm, and themarshal had become susceptible to cold during his long residence inIndia. A good fire therefore blazed upon the hearth. A door, concealedby the hangings, and leading to a back staircase, opened slowly, anda man entered the chamber. He carried a basket of wood, and advancedleisurely to the fireplace, before which he knelt clown, and began toarrange the logs symmetrically in a box that stood besides the hearth.After some minutes occupied in this manner, still kneeling, he graduallyapproached another door, at a little distance from the chimney, andappeared to listen with deep attention, as if he wished to hear what waspassing in the next room.
This man, employed as an inferior servant in the house, had the mostridiculously stupid look that can be imagined. His functions consistedin carrying wood, running errands, etc. In other respects he was a kindof laughing-stock to the other servants. In a moment of good humor,Dagobert, who filled the post of major-domo, had given this idiot thename of "Loony" (lunatic), which he had retained ever since, and whichhe deserved in every respect, as well for his awkwardness and folly asfor his unmeaning face, with its grotesquely flat nose, sloping chin,and wide, staring eyes. Add to this description a jacket of red stuff,and a triangular white apron, and we must acknowledge that the simpletonwas quite worthy of his name.
Yet, at the moment when Loony listened so attentively at the door of theadjoining room, a ray of quick intelligence animated for an instant hisdull and stupid countenance.
When he had thus listened for a short time, Loony returned to thefireplace, still crawling on his knees; then rising, he again took hisbasket half full of wood, and once more approaching the door at whichhe had listened knocked discreetly. No one answered. He knocked a secondtime, and more loudly. Still there was the same silence.
Then he said, in a harsh, squeaking, laughable voice: "Ladies, do youwant any wood, if you please, for your fire?"
Receiving no answer, Loony placed his basket on the ground, opened thedoor gently, and entered the next room, after casting a rapid glancearound. He came out again in a few seconds, looking from side to sidewith an anxious air, like a man who had just accomplished some importantand mysterious task.
Taking up his basket, he was about to leave Marshal Simon's room, whenthe door of the private staircase was opened slowly and with precaution,and Dagobert appeared.
The soldier, evidently surprised at the servant's presence, knitted hisbrows, and exclaimed abruptly, "What are you doing here?"
At this sudden interrogation, accompanied by a growl expressive of theill-humor of Spoil-sport, who followed close on his master's heels,Loony uttered a cry of real or pretended terror. To give, perhaps, anappearance of greater reality to his dread, the supposed simpleton lethis basket fall on the ground, as if astonishment and fear had loosenedhis hold of it.
"What are you doing, numbskull?" resumed Dagobert, whose countenance wasimpressed with deep sadness, and who seemed little disposed to laugh atthe fellow's stupidity.
"Oh, M. Dagobert! how you frighten me! Dear me! what a pity I had not anarmful of plates, to prove it was not my fault if I broke them all."
"I ask what you are doing," resumed the soldier.
"You see, M. Dagobert," replied Loony, pointing to his basket, "that Icame with some wood to master's room, so that he might burn it, if itwas cold--which it is."
"Very well. Pick up your wood, and begone!"
"Oh, M. Dagobert! my legs tremble under me. How you did scare me, to besure!"
"Will you begone, brute?" resumed the veteran; and seizing Loony by thearm, he pushed him towards the door, while Spoil-sport, with recumbentears, and hair standing up like the quills of a porcupine, seemedinclined to accelerate his retreat.
"I am going, M. Dagobert, I am going," replied the simpleton, as hehastily gathered up his basket; "only please to tell the dog--"
"Go to the devil, you stupid chatterbox!" cried Dagobert, as he pushedLoony through the doorway.
Then the soldier bolted the door which led to the private staircase, andgoing to that which communicated with the apartments of the two sisters,he double-locked it. Having done this, he hastened to the alcovein which stood the bed and taking down a pair of loaded pistols, hecarefully removed the percussion caps, and, unable to repress a deepsigh, restored the weapons to the place in which he had found them.Then, as if on second thoughts, he took down an Indian dagger with avery sharp blade, and drawing it from its silver-gilt sheath, proceededto break the point of this murderous instrument, by twisting it beneathone of the iron castors of the bed.
Dagobert then proceeded to unfasten the two doors, and, returning slowlyto the marble chimney-piece, he leaned against it with a gloomy andpensive air. Crouching before the fire, Spoil-sport followed with anattentive eye the least movement of his master. The good dog displayeda rare and intelligent sagacity. The soldier, having drawn out hishandkerchief, let fall, without perceiving it, a paper containing a rollof tobacco. Spoil-sport, who had all the qualities of a retriever ofthe Rutland race, took the paper between his teeth, and, rising uponhis hind-legs, presented it respectfully to Dagobert. But the latterreceived it mechanically, and appeared indifferent to the dexterity ofhis dog. The grenadier's countenance revealed as much sorrow asanxiety. After remaining for some minutes near the fire, with fixed andmeditative look, he began to walk about the room in great agitation, oneof his hands thrust into the bosom of his long blue frock-coat, whichwas buttoned up to the chin, and the other into one of his hind-pockets.
From time to time he stopped abruptly, and seemed to make reply to hisown thoughts, or uttered an exclamation of doubt and uneasiness; then,turning towards the trophy of arms, he shook his head mournfully,and murmured, "No matter--this fear may be idle; but he has acted soextraordinarily these two days, that it is at all events more prudent--"
He continued his walk, and said, after a new and prolonged silence: "Yeshe must tell me. It makes me too uneasy. And then the poor children--itis enough to break one's heart."
And Dagobert hastily drew his moustache between his thumb andforefinger, a nervous movement, which with him was an evident symptomof extreme agitation. Some minutes after, the soldier resumed, stillanswering his inward thoughts: "What can it be? It is hardly possible tobe the letters, they are too infamous; he despises them. And yet But no,no--he is above that!"
And Dagobert again began to walk with hasty steps. Suddenly, Spoil-sportpricked up his ears, turned his head in the direction of the staircasedoor, and growled hoarsely. A few seconds after, some one knocked at thedoor.
"Who is there?" said Dagobert. There was no answer, but the personknocked again. Losing patience, the soldier went hastily to open it, andsaw the servant's stupid face.
"Why don't you answer, when I ask who knocks!" said the soldier,angrily.
"M. Dagobert, you sent me away just now, and I was afraid of making youcross, if I said I had come again."
"What do you want? Speak then--come in, stupid!" cried the exasperated.Dagobert, as he pulled him into the room.
"M. Dagobert, don't be angry--I'll tell you all about it--it is a youngman."
"Well?"
"He wants to speak to you directly, Mr. Dagobert."
"His name?"
"His name, M. Dagobert?" replied Loony, rolling about and laughing withan idiotic air.
"Yes, his name. Speak, idiot!"
"Oh, M. Dagobert! it's all in joke that you ask me his name!"
"You are determined, fool that you are, to drive me out of my senses!"cried the soldier, seizing Loony by the collar. "The name of this you
ngman!"
"Don't be angry, M. Dagobert. I didn't tell you the name because youknow it."
"Beast!" said Dagobert, shaking his fist at him.
"Yes, you do know it, M. Dagobert, for the young man is your own son. Heis downstairs, and wants to speak to you directly--yes, directly."
The stupidity was so well assumed, that Dagobert was the dupe of it.Moved to compassion rather than anger by such imbecility, he lookedfixedly at the servant, shrugged his shoulders, and said, as he advancedtowards the staircase, "Follow me!"
Loony obeyed; but, before closing the door, he drew a letter secretlyfrom his pocket, and dropped it behind him without turning his head,saying all the while to Dagobert, for the purpose of occupying hisattention: "Your son is in the court, M. Dagobert. He would not comeup--that's why he is still downstairs!"
Thus talking, he closed the door, believing he had left the letteron the floor of Marshal Simon's room. But he had reckoned withoutSpoil-sport. Whether he thought it more prudent to bring up the rear,or, from respectful deference for a biped, the worthy dog had been thelast to leave the room, and, being a famous carrier, as soon as he sawthe letter dropped by Loony, he took it delicately between his teeth,and followed close on the heels of the servant, without the latterperceiving this new proof of the intelligence and sagacity ofSpoil-sport.
