Embarrassed, she poked him in the chest. With the hand that wore his ring. “That’s what you get for not feeding me.”
“Why don't we go out? They have a really nice restaurant, Junonia, at the Casa Blanca Resort and Spa. I took my mom there once. Afterward, we can take a walk on the beach, maybe there'll be a wedding going on and we can watch from a distance.” He snagged her hand, ran a thumb over the ring he'd put there. “We can stop in and talk with Barefoot Brides if you'd like.” When she remained silent, he shrugged, doing nothing to hide his disappointment at her reaction to his suggestion. “If you’d rather have go somewhere more casual to eat, we can hit up the Toasted Pelican or South of the Border.”
“Look what happened the last time we went into town.” She swallowed down the lump in her throat. “Can’t we just stay here? Order in something? We have to go out tomorrow, for the ball game.” Her heart began to beat hard, making it necessary for her to swallow again. “I’d really like a day to just be here with you. Don’t be upset,” she said when he remained silent, studying her. She silently begged him to not push for more explanation, to simply accept her desire, her need, for them to have one day alone.
“How could I possibly be upset when I get the chance to have a beautiful woman all to myself?”
So, they spent the day sheltered inside the luxury of his sister’s home. They toasted bagels for breakfast, shared a shower. She sat beside him when he called his sister, her nerves morphing into sick shame at Anna and Quinn’s enthusiastic response to the news. As Andrew ended the call Hailey thought if not for the promise she’d made to be at the ball game tomorrow, she’d find a way to leave today. It would be better for everyone involved if she ended this farce of an engagement as soon as possible.
“Hey.” She blinked as Andrew knelt before her. He lifted a hand, wiped at a tear that clung to her lashes. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong?” she demanded, even as her voice broke. “You mean other than I’ve done nothing but lie to your family since I arrived here? And now you’re doing the same.”
“No,” he answered patiently. “We told my mom and Anna that we’re engaged.” He looked down at the ring he’d put on her finger. “Right now, that’s what we are. Hailey.” He closed his hands over hers. “I promise that I’ll accept whatever decision you make. I promise that I’ll find a way to explain it to my family without them thinking less of you.”
What choice did she have but to trust his promise? Wasn’t the fact that she’d plunged ahead without concern for how this impacted his family relationship testament to her own inadequacy where family matters were concerned? She might doubt his ability to find a way to prevent his family from blaming her, but she didn’t for one second doubt they would take his side, continue to love and support him.
However, she also didn't put much faith in his promise to accept her decisions. Not only was he a fighter pilot – with all of the arrogance, determination, and focus that required – but he was competitive. He quite simply didn't believe in backing down. It's one reason why Joe's death hit him so hard.
She fought the crush of despair that threatened to all but smother her. She’d already made so many mistakes. And yet, she couldn’t find the wherewithal to walk away from this small window of time with Andrew.
For the rest of the day they played. They competed at cards, and then with the balls and tubes designed for the pool. They indulged and enjoyed the coming together that resulted when their water games led to intimacy. During a dinner delivery that Andrew arranged from Junonia’s, she coaxed stories of his family from him, stockpiling them in her mind and heart.
Later, when they finally went to bed, Hailey lay still, Andrew spooned behind her, his arm around her waist. His hand covering their child. Here in the dark, where he couldn't see her face, where she couldn't voice aloud her wishes, she could pretend it would always be like this.
Even as she admitted she had no choice but to leave him.
Andrew would never claim to be an expert on women. However, even he sensed something was wrong with Hailey.
It wasn't that she acted differently. When she mentioned her plan to go for a run, at first he'd balked. She'd reassured him the doctor had confirmed exercise was fine at this point in the pregnancy, especially since she already exercised on a daily basis. Since he'd been feeling a little sluggish after so many days of inactivity, he joined her on the run. He had to admit it had felt good to move and push his muscles a little. They'd each taken it up a notch and made it into a competition. By the time they returned to the house, Hailey's cheeks had taken on a pink glow that he figured was as much a result of the teasing they'd tossed back and forth as the exertion of the run.
Hours later, they arrived early at the ball field. It had almost felt strange being in uniform after so much time. But the biggest punch in the gut had been seeing Hailey in hers. She looked strong and so sure of herself, very different from the young woman he was coming to learn had been emotionally wounded by the neglect of her parents.
Greeted by Rachel and one of the team's owners, they accepted handshakes and words of appreciation, posed for photos from both individuals and the team's publicity department. Andrew assumed some of their preferred treatment was due not only to Rachel but also to his brother-in-law, Quinn. When he and Hailey stood side-by-side in front of the pitching mound, she smiled and waved at the crowd. Pride swelled in him. Pride in his country, pride for the woman beside him.
The woman he loved.
Thrown by the thought, the realization, he bungled the pitch. It bounced in front of the catcher assigned for him. Hailey’s however made a solid smacking sound as it landed center of her catcher’s mitt
“Way to go, Captain,” she said.
He stared at her, trying to understand when this had happened. From the beginning he realized. From that first glance, then their first conversation, and most definitely after their first time as lovers, he’d been sliding toward this point of admitting he loved her.
The question was, what did he do about it?
Thankfully, there were more handshakes and photos distracting him from the issue. He and Hailey were escorted to the section right behind home plate.
“This is great,” she exclaimed and then wiggled her brows in delight. “Prime seats.”
“You want something to eat?” he asked, hoping for a few minutes away to try and get a handle on his thoughts. On his heart.
“Nah, I’ll wait a little. Besides.” She stood at attention at the prompting of the announcer and the swell of music for the National Anthem. No sooner had they sat when an usher, and it still amused him to picture his mother doing this as she’d told him she did on a part-time basis, delivered plastic cups of cold beer.
“Courtesy of a gentleman sitting a few rows back. Wanted me to tell you how much he appreciates your service.”
“Oh,” Andrew began. “Thanks, but she…”
“Please tell him thank you very much,” Hailey interrupted, taking one of the cups.
“Hailey,” he said when the usher walked away.
“Andrew.” She looked at him. “Do you honestly think I’d do anything, anything at all, that could potentially be harmful to this baby?” She covered his hand with hers and he noticed some of the color on her cheeks had faded. “I have plenty of doubt about my ability to be a good parent, but the one thing I can promise you is that I will always do whatever it takes to protect this child. I also will not insult a man who wants to thank us for our service.”
A cheer from the crowd drew their attention to the field. On the replay screen, they watched the second baseman make a spectacular stop that resulted in a double play. From the corner of his eye, he saw Hailey take one small sip and then place the plastic cup in the cup holder. They cheered on the home team for the next three innings, ate hot dogs and fries, and accepted words of gratitude from people who paused to talk. Not once did Hailey reach for the cup of beer. He felt like an idiot for having doubted her devoti
on to the baby. He decided between innings was the best time to apologize. Then, the big screen in the outfield gave him a better way.
The “Kiss Cam” had already spotlighted two other couples when they zeroed in on him and Hailey. More than willing to oblige, he used the tip of his finger to turn her face to his and, instead of a chaste brush of lips, planted a long, loving kiss. Cheers and applause erupted around them. By the time he drew away, the home team had come up to bat and color had once again brought a glow to Hailey's cheeks.
And just like that, as he stared into the warm eyes of this strong, intelligent, independent woman that was to be the mother of his child, he knew what to do, what to say. What he wanted.
“Marry me, Hailey. For real.”
She blinked. “What?”
“Marry me, Hailey. Let me take care of you and the baby.”
Her eyes closed. “The way you didn’t, couldn’t, with that girl from high school.”
“Yes. No. Damn it, this is the right thing to do.”
Her eyes opened and for a flash of a second he thought he saw hurt burst into her gaze. Only her words were calm. “I really don't think the middle of a ball game is the best time or place to discuss this.”
He opened his mouth to argue, only to stop because Hailey suddenly stood at the crack of a bat. She watched and celebrated along with the rest of the crowd as the left fielder for the home team hit a go-ahead home run. Andrew decided she was right, this wasn’t the time or place to discuss their future. When they returned to Anna’s home he had every intention of convincing her to marry him.
Only, it almost seemed as if Hailey had read his mind. She used every opportunity to prevent them from being alone, from talking to people sitting in the stands around them and as they exited the stadium, to accepting Rachel’s invitation to dinner. By time he drove them home she fell immediately asleep.
“C’mon on sweetheart,” he said, after parking and opening her car door. She barely woke enough to walk like a drunk while he guided her inside, as she leaned on the dresser while he stripped her clothes and finally collapse into bed.
Believing he had a handle on their future, he stripped as well and climbed into bed, nestling her close.
And woke to an empty bed.
At first, he didn’t think anything of it. Then he went in search of her, beginning with the kitchen. Then to the pool area, even stepping outside the front door to see if he could spot her returning from a jog. That was when he realized her car was gone. Still, he ignored the little streak of panic.
“She probably went to the store, or maybe the bakery,” he muttered even as his feet took him down the hallway. With a deep breath, he opened the door to the spare bedroom.
He couldn't say shock was his first response or even surprise. It was the pain that lanced through him that took his breath away. Numb, he walked to the bed and stared down at the envelope. He didn't need to read the letter inside, although of course, he would.
The diamond ring centered on the envelope told him everything.
Chapter 8
For the first week she was in Colorado, Hailey kept looking over her shoulder. Until she realized Andrew hadn’t come after her. Now, three months after she’d left Barefoot Bay, she concluded he’d accepted her words as truth.
I know how it feels to be an unplanned responsibility you had little choice but to take on. While I won’t prevent you from having time with our child, I won’t burden you with believing you have to take care of me.
Andrew had no idea how painful it had been to write those words, to give up the faint chance that she could be part of something greater than herself. Unable to resist, she rubbed her bare ring finger. Almost as distressing as hearing his proposal at the ball park was based on his need to protect. That moment had been when she'd finally faced reality and known she could pretend no longer.
It still amazed her that she’d managed to slip out of bed, out of his embrace, pack and leave without him realizing her intent. In contrast to her decision, she’d had moments of hope that he’d awake in time to stop her.
They’d had passion, and yes, because it was all they could have for a short while, a solid friendship. But she wanted more than a commitment due to obligation. She wanted one based on mutual respect and love. The irony was she wouldn’t have this need if not for having met and loved Andrew. Only, throughout all these long days and nights of being alone, she’d heard nothing from him.
The fact that she knew he'd been deployed to Korea didn't matter. Instead, she concentrated on believing it was one more confirmation that she'd made the right decision.
She was making a future here in Colorado for her and her child. There were the occasional moments when she missed the rush, the adrenaline-fueled pressure of making battle decisions, of knowing she had a hand in standing for her country’s freedom. In return, she had a home, one within walking distance of the Air Force Academy campus, rather than temporary quarters for the first time in her life.
She’d surprised herself by becoming very domestic. Her days were spent preparing for the upcoming semester, but her evenings were spent pouring over paint chips and design websites. She read everything she could find on pregnancy and baby care. She’d also had more than ample time to consider if every decision she’d made was correct or not.
As if supporting that doubt, she suddenly stopped in her tracks with the realization that Andrew stood in front of her home.
“Hello, Hailey.”
Her breath caught, her legs weakened. It took every bit of strength and concentration she possessed to stand still and not run to him. Oh, God, he looked so good. Above and beyond how sexy he looked in his uniform, even if the uniform showed travel-wrinkles, he was whole and safe. While she was grateful for that, seeing him now made the ache in her heart worse than when she’d left him.
“You bought a house.” He stepped forward. “And you’ll be teaching at the Academy.” As he lowered his gaze, his eyes warmed the way they so often did when they made love. “You’re showing.” His head jerked up before she could say anything. “You’re okay? The baby’s okay?”
“Yes, we’re both doing fine. Is that why you’re here, Andrew? To make sure I’m doing everything the way I should? The way you believe I should?” She refused to feel guilty for being abrupt.
“I'm here because I'm breaking a promise I made you. I told you I'd honor whatever decision you made.” He reached into a pocket, drew out an envelope. Hailey knew it was the one she'd left him. “I’m sorry, but I can't do that.”
“You have to.” She swallowed down tears along with panic. “I told you, I don’t need you to feel responsible. I can handle this.”
“Yes, I know you can. I think that’s what scares me the most – knowing that you don’t need me. What you haven’t considered is that I need you.”
“I know you need to do the right thing.”
“Did I ever tell you about my sister turning Quinn away when he asked her to marry him?”
“No,” she said, lifting a hand to rub at her temple, confused by this shift in the conversation.
“Anna knew she couldn’t ask him to give up baseball, but if she went with him, as he asked, it would mean living with the constant possibility of him being traded. Not to mention all the traveling he has to do with the team. And all of that would involve often saying good-bye, just as she’d had to do countless times while growing up.”
“What changed her mind?”
Andrew smiled a little. “Quinn reminded her there would be plenty of hellos.”
“I know all about both hello and good-bye.”
“Yes, but you only know them from one angle.” She frowned. “You only know them from the sense of obligation and responsibility that your mother made you feel. Anna and Quinn have discovered what it’s like when it’s rooted in love.” He reached for her, drew her into his embrace, and lowered his mouth to a breath away from hers. She began to tremble.
“Discover that better way with me,
Hailey.” His mouth brushed hers. “Make a life with me.”
“I don’t know how to do that.”
“Sure you do.” He stared into her eyes. “Why did you buy this house? Change your career to teach at the Academy? Because,” he went on before she could say anything. “You want to give this child the kind of stability you never had. You don’t want this child to know how it feels to be left behind. You didn’t ask me to change my career.”
“No, of course not, I would never expect you to be someone that you’re not.”
“By not asking, you accept that I will have to leave the two of you from time to time. I promise I’ll always come back, Hailey. Not because I feel responsible. I’ll come back because I love you and I want to be with you.”
“What?” She pulled out of his embrace, shoved him back a little. “You don’t love me.”
“I do.” He grinned and to her surprise, lowered to one knee. “I like the sound of that. I hope I get to say it again.” He extended his hand and she saw the sparkle of a diamond. The ring he’d already given her once. The ring that had been so difficult to remove and leave behind.
“Marry me, Hailey. Not because I think I have to take care of you, although I do want to do just that. Not because you think that I think I’m responsible for the baby. Marry me because I love you. I promise to always love you.”
“Stand up,” she said, staring at him, beginning to realize he meant what he said. Tears flooded her eyes.
“Not until I get an answer.”
“What if we can’t get it right? What if we make a mess of this?”
“We’ll have our entire life together to get it right.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“How can you not?”
“I don’t know how to be like your mother, or sister, or even how to be part of a family.”
“Hailey.” Standing, he reached for her hand. She couldn’t find the wherewithal to close her hand into a fist. He slipped the ring onto her finger – but only onto the tip.
The Pilot's Promise Page 7
