STATE OF GRACE
Book Six of the Grace Series
M. Lauryl Lewis
Copyright 2015 M. Lauryl Lewis / Larson Falls Publishing
Cover by Christian Bentulan - http://coversbychristian.com
This work is one of fiction. Any resemblances to people or places are purely coincidental. This copyrighted work may not be reproduced in any manner without explicit permission of the rights holder.
Table of Contents
A NOTE TO READERS
FROM PRAYING FOR GRACE (#5):
STATE OF GRACE
CHAPTER 1
CHAPTER 2
CHAPTER 3
CHAPTER 4
CHAPTER 5
CHAPTER 6
CHAPTER 7
CHAPTER 8
CHAPTER 9
CHAPTER 10
CHAPTER 11
CHAPTER 12
CHAPTER 13
CHAPTER 14
CHAPTER 15
CHAPTER 16
CHAPTER 17
CHAPTER 18
EPILOGUE
DEDICATION
For Rooney and Bubby, because you both are also so very brave. And for Riko, because you are forced to be the bravest of us all.
A NOTE TO READERS
To all of my readers who have waited so patiently for this book to release, thank you.
FROM PRAYING FOR GRACE (#5):
The next four hours were the best I had slept in months. Gus woke me as soon as Hope began to stir. At first, I feared he was waking me to tell me that she had passed away, as Molly had. Seeing the fear in my eyes, he quickly calmed me.
“It’s ok, she’s just waking up hungry,” he said as he smiled down at both of us. “Laura brought in some old towels that she cut down to use for diapers. I’ve already changed her.”
Our new baby had one eye open and was smacking her lips hungrily. I touched her cheek lightly and she turned her face toward me in search of a meal.
“She needs a bath,” I said gently as I smiled at her.
“I’ll ask Laura to warm some water while you feed her.”
“Gus?”
“Ayup?”
“Thank you.”
“For what, darlin’?”
“For her. For you. Just for everything.”
“You’re welcome. I’ll be back in a few minutes, okay?”
“Ok.”
He left the room to find Laura, and I adjusted myself in the bed, sitting up so that I could hold Hope to my breast. She was warm and making soft little noises as she searched eagerly. One of her little hands caressed my breast as she suckled. I slipped my thumb under her palm and looked at her pudgy fingers. Her skin was soft. Everything about her was amazing. Everything about her was good, in a world full of bad.
Before long, Laura and Gus came back to the family room. They both smiled at the sight of me and the baby. I couldn’t help but smile back.
“Everyone else is asleep,” said Laura. “I heated water in the kitchen so both mama and baby can get cleaned up. Gus can help you while I get a proper bed ready for you guys.”
“Thanks Laura,” I said quietly while Hope continued to feed.
“I also left some rice and meat on the kitchen table for both of you. You’ll need it to get your strength back.”
“Can I ask you one more favor, Laura?” asked Gus.
“Anything.”
“Do you mind holding the baby so I can get Zoe taken care of first? I don’t want her getting up alone for the first time in case she’s weak.”
“Do I mind?” chuckled Laura. “I’d be thrilled to hold the little one.”
***
Gus helped me to the bathroom, where I was able to do my private business and shower. Even though the water was cold, it felt good to rid myself of the mess of birth and hours of built up sweat. Once I was done, Gus set me up at the kitchen table, where I began eating the food that Laura had left out for us. Gus excused himself to get Hope, saying he’d eat later. I was pretty sure the meat was rabbit that had been stir fried with fresh vegetables from her garden. I hadn’t realized that I was as hungry as I was until I began eating.
Before long Gus walked in, carrying Hope in his arms. He looked like a natural.
“Someone’s ready for her first bath,” he said.
“Is Laura coming in?” I asked.
“Nah. She headed back to bed. Poor thing was exhausted after everything today.”
“She’s sweet. I really like her.”
“Yeah, me too.”
I stood and joined Gus by the sink, where a pot of hot water had been cooling. It was just warm enough for Hope’s bath. He asked me if I wanted to bathe her, but I declined. She was too new, and too small. I was afraid I’d hurt her. Instead, I watched as he gently poured warm water on her and followed with soap. She cried when he rinsed her off.
I walked beside him as he carried her down the hallway, wrapped in a towel, to the bedroom that had belonged to Alice. It was still the middle of the night and dark, but Laura had left a couple of candles lit beside the bed. Gus laid Hope down on the bed and finished drying her off. She was still pink, but clean now. Her head was covered in fine white hair. In looking at her beautiful eyes more closely, I realized that her tiny eyelashes were white as well.
“Gus, why’s her hair so light?”
He sighed. “I’ve noticed it too. We’ll need to watch her, but it might be albinism.”
“Be what?” I asked, being unfamiliar with the term.
“An albino. Her eyes are so light, and her hair.”
“What if she is? What does it mean?”
“Worst case scenario we need to keep her out of sunlight. Possible blindness down the road.”
I climbed onto the bed and leaned over Hope, kissing her on the head.
“I’ll love her no matter what.”
“She’ll be ok.”
I knew he couldn’t promise that.
***
The next weeks passed as the six of us got to know each other better. Hope worried us constantly as her growth continued at a rapid rate. She ate almost non-stop and at almost a month old looked and acted at least twice her age. It was clear by now that she indeed was albino, as Gus had thought. Her hair was fine as silk and white as can be, and her eyes remained pale blue. She seldom cried or fussed and brought joy to us all. She didn’t appear to have any health issues, and seemed to be thriving. Gus and I each felt a connection to her on the deep level that we connected with each other. Sometimes, I’d hold her as she slept and I could feel the emotions of her dreams. Hoot quickly took on the role of uncle, and Laura and Clark were thrilled to treat her like a grandchild. It wasn’t the family I had imagined having one day, but I was thrilled to have them all in our lives.
Laura and I spent most of our time in her garden, which now included an expansive green house that Gus and Hoot had made out of logs from the nearby forest and clear plastic sheeting that Clark had left over from when they had first built the house. We hoped it would work well enough to provide fresh produce through the coming winter. Laura was teaching me how to can fruits and vegetables, as well as fish that we caught from a nearby stream. We had no plans to leave the little concrete house built into the hill. It was home now. It had been weeks since we had seen any of the dead. Or the living. Still, we lived on edge, always expecting the worst.
Four weeks to the date after her birth, Gus and I vowed to love and cherish each other, along with Hope, in front of our new family. We celebrated with homemade wine and a wild roast turkey that was stuffed with cornmeal, potatoes, and herbs.
ONE YEAR LATER
Our first winter was tough on us all. We lost most of our garden when snowfall collapsed one end of the greenhouse. Luckily, Laura a
nd I had done a significant amount of canning and Hoot and Gus kept a makeshift outdoor cooler full of small game. Summer brought with it new hope as the surrounding land began to thaw. Our daughter was nearly a year old now, but the size of a two-year-old. She had learned to walk, but was still a bit unsteady on her legs. She hadn’t uttered a word yet, but loved to laugh at her daddy. Her eyes remained a shade of blue paler than the sky and her white hair had grown to her shoulders. Luckily, she didn’t seem bothered by the sun despite her pale skin.
“You ladies ready?” asked Gus, staring at us from the open doorway of our bedroom.
I smoothed the knee-length patchwork dress that Laura had made for Hope out of scraps of fabric she had lying around and patted her bottom as she toddled toward her dad.
“All ready,” I said with a smile.
“Laura packed lunch,” Gus said as he scooped Hope into his arms. “Can you say ‘lunch’?” he asked her.
She responded by giggling at him.
“That’s Daddy’s big girl,” he said as he gave her a kiss on her pale cheek.
“I’ll be right behind you,” I said.
“We’ll wait for you by the front door.”
“Ok.”
It was our first big outing, all six of us together. Laura preferred to stay close to home, but Clark had talked her into joining us on a brief hunting expedition disguised as a picnic. Hoot and Clark packed rifles in the off chance we came across any big game, or the dead.
The air outside the home was crisp and fresh. The sky was blue and a gentle breeze blew. We hiked for almost a mile. Hope insisted on walking part of the time, but Gus carried her as much as she’d allow.
We stopped to eat lunch in a meadow bordered on one side by the edge of a glacier. Hope refused to eat anything but the chocolate chip cookies that Laura had baked that morning. She was busy playing in the nearby wildflowers while the rest of us ate roasted marmot that Clark had shot just the day before. It had been so long since I had felt the dead inside of my mind that I didn’t realize it wasn’t Gus or Hope I was feeling. By the time I was aware of the creature’s hunger, Hope was almost to it. I stood, dropping my plate of food, and began to run toward her.
“Hope!” I screamed.
My little girl turned to look at me, and then looked away. My stomach dropped in fear. I could sense Gus close behind me. I could sense his thoughts. How could we have let her go so far... Panic set in as Hope quickly approached the edge of the glacier that sat across the meadow. That’s when I first saw it. It looked like half a man. It was reaching toward her, but not advancing. At first I thought it was missing its lower half.
“Hope! Stop!” I screamed shrilly.
To my horror, she continued toward the creature. It wasn’t approaching her and appeared to only be a torso, which was oddly upright. I could feel its hunger in my head. The familiar hunger of the newly risen. Its only goal was to feed, and it wanted my daughter. It craved her flesh in a way that I had never felt one of the dead crave flesh before.
“Hope!” screamed Gus, who I sensed only steps behind me.
She reached the creature only a couple of yards before we could get there. It reached its arms toward her in desperation. She stood before it, seemingly unafraid. The dead man dropped his arms as she took two final baby steps toward him. It seemed transfixed by her eyes. She reached one of her pudgy hands out and touched him on the forehead.
“Bye-bye,” she said suddenly. Her first words.
Gus passed me in his rush to reach Hope. He scooped her up and swung her away from the threat, holding her close.
I looked down at the Roamer, who was now slumped forward and lifeless. His lower half was frozen in the ice.
“Holy shit,” said Hoot as he reached us. “What the fuck happened?”
“Bye-bye,” said Hope with a giggle, struggling to get out of Gus’ arms. He refused to let her go.
“It must have thawed,” I said.
I no longer sensed anything from the creature. I kicked at its head with my foot to make sure it was really dead. Its head fell backward. The creature’s left cheek was bruised and scuffed. Its left arm was twisted unnaturally, making me think its shoulder may have been dislocated at some point. The right side of its beige winter jacket had a label that said “Steve.”
“That’s mountain climbing gear,” said Gus, pointing to a pick axe frozen in the nearby ice. “He must have frozen up here, poor fucker.”
“Hope? Did you do this?” I asked her.
“Ma-ma. Bye-bye,” she muttered, pointing to the dead and still-half-frozen man.
My eyes filled with tears, hearing her first words. I reached up and touched her cheek gently. She shared with me her deepest thoughts, not using words. Our child had killed the creature with her touch. She knew it was evil. She knew she was here to rid the world of them.
STATE OF GRACE
CHAPTER 1
Only two of us remained from our original group; a fact that was still so very hard to swallow. Hoot joined us just before we lost Boggs. My heart still ached daily at the loss of my best friend. Hope was already sixteen months old, and the size of a three-year-old. Accelerated growth seemed to be her “norm.” Gus tried to convince me to not worry. Tried being the key word.
Winter had been hard on all of us, but especially Laura. Despite having the cooking stove in the kitchen and the open fireplace in the middle of the living room, the cold constantly crept into the mountain home into which she and her husband, Clark, had welcomed us. Laura’s arthritis worsened with each passing month. Food stores quickly dwindled and Laura lost weight faster than the rest of us. She was thin to start with, but became nearly skeletal by the time spring arrived. Clark doted on his wife, but his face became creased with worry as time passed. Gus was still my knight in shining armor. Our bond with each other was as strong as ever, seemingly amplified when Hope was near. Hope. She was the joy in our lives. Not just for myself and Gus, but all of us. She seldom spoke, but emanated joy all around her. Her pale skin and white hair and eyelashes remained as fair as the day she was born. Her eyes were light but had darkened a bit and she showed no signs of visual deficits. She was able to tune into our emotions easily. The green lines that had riddled my leg, abdomen, and neck while pregnant with her had receded back to my hip, but the light lines that had mingled with them during my pregnancy remained. They were the same shade of pale as my daughter’s skin.
As spring arrived, preparations began for venturing out and away from our hillside home. We were critically low on supplies, and the decision to leave was made after many nights of sitting around the fire discussing options. Leaving during the freeze of winter was out of the question, as snow was too deep and temperatures far too cold. We had gone months without seeing any of the dead, which we could only assume was a result of the bitter cold. One of the last Roamers we had seen was down a few hundred feet in elevation and had frozen stiff, literally. As badly as we all wanted to stay in our “Hobbit House,” we knew there was no way to scavenge enough supplies and pack them in before the next winter would hit. The only drivable road had washed out when fall hit the year prior. While we attempted to grow and preserve our own food, our garden had failed and the remaining growing season was too short to sustain all six of us. The mountainous land around us was rocky and hard, far from being fertile farmland. Hunting provided us with protein, but animals were scarce. Like humans, their populations also dropped when the dead rose. The only option that made sense was to trek back to the lowlands, where unfortunately the dead were surely waiting.
CHAPTER 2
“Hope, it’s time,” I called out softly to our daughter as she sat quietly on the floor playing with blocks that Clark had hand carved out of wood.
She looked up at me, her face serious and unsmiling. She knew I was afraid.
“Put your blocks into their bag, sweetie,” I encouraged.
“No, Mama. Stay,” she babbled.
“No, we have to go. Remember? To get more f
ood?”
She shook her head back and forth, her loose white curls bouncing. “No, Mama. Bad. Bad.”
“Gus!” I called out, perhaps louder than necessary. “Hope needs you!”
“Coming, darlin’,” he called back.
I continued packing Hope’s clothes into a tote bag that Laura helped me sew. It had a wide opening and a long strap to comfortably wear over my shoulder and across my chest. It was large enough that Hope herself could sit inside if need be. We wouldn’t be taking much, just what clothes we could manage to layer on ourselves, dried venison, water, and weapons. And, of course, Hope’s favorite wooden blocks and a small rag doll that Laura made with love.
I smiled when Gus walked into the room, which caused Hope to do the same.
“Da-da!”
“Hi baby girl,” he said, greeting her.
I loved watching him interact with our daughter. They shared a very special love that warmed my heart.
“No bye-bye,” she said with a pout.
“Aw, baby girl, we have to go on an adventure. It’ll be warmer where we go, and we’ll find more food.”
She reached her arms up toward him and he leaned down and swooped her up.
“Daddy will keep you safe,” he added.
I prayed he would be able to make good on that promise.
He planted a kiss on her pudgy cheek and she leaned into his chest.
“I think everyone else is ready, darlin. What can I help with?” he asked me.
“Hope needs to put her dress on over her pajamas, and then her jacket.”
“I’m on it,” he said softly.
“She should wear her bonnet to help stay warm.”
“I’ll have Laura help with that,” he said with a smile.
“Thanks. I’m almost done packing. I hate to leave this place, Gus.”
“Yeah, me too. Some good memories here. Right, Hope?” he said, trying to make himself sound chipper.
Hope’s only reply was to turn her head and slip her left thumb into her mouth as she snuggled against her father’s chest.
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