Timid

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Timid Page 16

by Devney Perry

I’d known this would eventually happen and I hadn’t wanted to put her at any risk. So I’d driven up to Kalispell and gotten myself tested right after our first date. I’d also picked up my own box of condoms in case she wasn’t willing to take that chance.

  “This is your decision. If you want the added protection, I’m fine with that.”

  She dropped her eyes, taking a moment to think it over, then she shook her head and looked back up. “No, I trust you.”

  I wasn’t sure why.

  I’d messed up for years, not giving her the attention she deserved. Then I’d blown her first kiss. She had to know that before this was over, I’d fuck up at least a dozen more times. But still, she trusted me and it meant the world.

  I trusted her too. I’d never gone without a condom, no matter how many times women had begged me to go bare. I’d provided the protection. Always.

  Except for now.

  Willa was special. She was the exception to all my rules, because with her, there was no need to guard myself against manipulation or deception.

  She was the type of woman who did things the right way. In the right order. Date. Engagement. Fancy wedding. Her dad would walk her down the aisle and her mom would cry as they shared their father-daughter dance. After she was married, her husband would buy her a puppy. Then they’d have kids.

  Since that guy—whoever he was—would be getting those moments, I was taking this one.

  “Jackson?” Willa’s sweet voice snapped me out of my head. “Are you okay?”

  I smiled, shaking off the uneasy feeling in my gut. “Never better.”

  Dipping low, I gave her a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth, trailing my lips along her cheek to her ear. Her entire body trembled whenever I kissed her ear, so I captured an earlobe between my teeth, tugging at it before letting it go to drag my tongue up the curved shell.

  “Gosh,” she breathed.

  My arms banded around her back, pulling her flush against my body as I returned to her mouth. I went at her with full force, using every trick I had to leave her breathless.

  Our chests were heaving against one another’s when I finally unglued myself from her mouth. When had simple kissing gotten so damn good? Her tongue twisting with mine was enough to get me so worked up I could blow at any second. “God, Willa.”

  “Don’t change your mind,” she pleaded, assuming I’d stopped for a different reason.

  I grinned. “I won’t.”

  Loosening my arms, I slid my hands down her sides and picked her up, laying her down on the bed. Then I swatted the box of condoms away.

  She sat up and gripped the hem of her hoodie, but I stopped her. “Let me. Just close your eyes.”

  “Okay.” Her hands shook as she dropped her shirt and lay back on the bed.

  “It’s all right to be nervous,” I told her as I slid off her flip-flops.

  “I’m not.” She lifted her head, locking her gaze with mine. “I’m not nervous. Not with you.”

  She had so much faith in me—more than I deserved.

  Do not fuck this up.

  “Close your eyes.”

  She nodded, lying back down on the white quilt with her blond hair spread out to the sides. When her eyes drifted closed, I ran my hands slowly up her legs. The tremors in her body increased as I skated up her thighs toward the waistband of her jeans.

  While my fingers undid the button, I swung up on the bed, straddling her knees as I loomed over her. She smiled when my weight hit the bed but kept her eyes closed like I’d ordered.

  “God, you’re beautiful.”

  She smiled wider, proving my point.

  I undid her jeans and peeled them off her lean legs. Then I tossed them on the floor and feasted my eyes on her red lace panties.

  Her sexy-as-fuck lingerie had shocked the hell out of me at first. I’d expected to find prim and proper white, cotton briefs under Willa’s sundresses. But my woman was always in lace or silk. Sometimes she wore bikinis and other times a thong. No matter what color her panties were, her bras always matched.

  Undressing her was like opening a present.

  I didn’t know if the underwear was for me, but I didn’t care. If she did it to make herself feel pretty, I’d gladly be the guy who got to enjoy it too.

  “Are you wet for me, babe?” I ran a finger over the gusset of her panties, making her squirm. “You’re wet.”

  But she’d need to be wetter for me to fit. I went for the hem of her hoodie, pulling it up her ribs, making sure my knuckles raked across her creamy skin as I pulled it up. I grinned when I got a glimpse of her red bra. It had lace cups, like her panties, and her hard nipples were pink and puckered underneath. I lowered my mouth, sucking one into my mouth, lace and all.

  “Jackson,” Willa moaned, her hands coming to my head.

  Those sounds she made drove me wild. We’d been getting pretty hot and heavy these last couple of weeks and I’d worked hard to get to know her body.

  Our foreplay wasn’t just about putting in my due diligence to get the prize. It was about worshiping her body so she could trust me with it. It was about discovering her tells so I’d know when I hit the right spots.

  I abandoned one nipple, moving toward the next, dropping kisses along her sternum as I did. After giving her other nipple some attention, I trailed my mouth down, kissing at the soft swells of her breasts. I kissed at the sensitive skin over her ribs because it made her breath catch. Then I kissed down the softness of her stomach, lingering on her belly button for just a moment because I loved how it made her hum.

  Willa’s hips pivoted back and forth, searching as I slowly went lower. I kissed down her mound, then like I’d done with her nipples, I sucked her clit into my mouth through her panties.

  “Oh my god,” she cried, nearly bucking off the bed.

  I smiled, rubbing her bud with the tip of my nose. She didn’t usually say god. She said gosh or goodness. I’d laughed my ass off when she’d let a golly gee slip once.

  She said god when I had my mouth on her.

  Wanting to see her bare, I leaned back and tugged at her panties, pulling them down her hips. As soon as I got them to her knees, she kicked them off and sent them shooting to the floor.

  “Be patient.” I chuckled.

  She shook her head. “You’re killing me here.”

  “Well, we can’t have that.” With a firm grip on her knees, I pressed her thighs apart, then dove in. My tongue found her hot and sweet center. I worked up and down her slit, lapping her up, though I avoided her clit to make it last. She was so responsive, especially when I gave her a hard suck. But tonight when she came, it was going to be around me.

  Damn, I was glad she’d pushed for this. I needed to sink inside her soon and shred the remaining barrier between us.

  As she moaned my name again, I realized she’d been right. We didn’t need anything other than us to make this special.

  Taking her to a fancy hotel could have made her uncomfortable. It was better here, in her own bed and her own space. She could be as loud as she wanted. She could cry if it hurt.

  Hating the idea of her in pain, I did my best to at least make this part feel good. I feasted on her, savoring her taste on my tongue until she was writhing and breathless. Then I leaned back to take her all in.

  Her hoodie was bunched above her breasts. Her knees were splayed open. And her eyes, full of lust and devotion, were aimed at me.

  Only me.

  I was the only man who’d ever seen that look on her face.

  “Sweatshirt and bra off, babe.”

  She nodded, scrambling to sit up. While she yanked it over her head and unclasped her bra, I whipped off both my plaid shirt and the T-shirt underneath.

  “Pull back the covers,” I ordered. “Get in bed.” I didn’t want to risk getting blood on her grandma’s quilt.

  Willa nodded again, obeying my commands without question.

  As she scooted under the bedding, I stepped onto the floor and ripped down my
jeans while simultaneously toeing off my boots. When I turned, Willa’s eyes were wide and aimed right at my bobbing cock.

  “Touch me,” I whispered, stepping up to the bed. Then I took one of her hands and brought it to my dick.

  She looked up at me as her palm fitted around my shaft. Her hands were so dainty but damn if she didn’t have a fierce grip. As her fingers closed around me, I fitted my hand on top of hers, just like I’d done when I’d taught her how to jack me off.

  We stroked in unison, our eyes locked as our hands moved. A flush of color spread across her bare chest, rising up her neck as her grip tightened.

  “Fuck, your hand feels good.” I closed my eyes and dropped my hand, letting her work me for a minute. When her thumb touched the drop at the tip, my eyes opened just in time to see her lick her lips.

  Shit, I was going to come if she kept at it. I grabbed her wrist, pulling it away from my cock. Then I planted a knee in the bed and urged her onto her back. I settled into the space between her legs, careful not to crush her with my weight.

  “You okay?”

  She nodded.

  “Tell me, Willa. Tell me you’re okay.”

  “I’m okay.” Her hands came to my cheeks. “Promise.”

  I leaned down and gave her a soft kiss. “Say the word and we’ll stop.”

  “I don’t want to stop.” She angled up her hips, brushing her damp curls against my dick.

  “I’ll go slow.” I reached between us, gripping my cock at the base. I used the tip to toy with her clit over and over as I latched my mouth onto hers and kissed her deep.

  Her legs began to tremble and her tongue twisted in a frantic rhythm against mine, so I gave her clit one last flick and then positioned at her entrance.

  The change made her freeze and her eyes pop open. I broke my mouth from hers and held her gaze as my hips inched me forward.

  “Okay?”

  She nodded.

  The tip slid right through her wet folds, her heat beckoning me further. I balled my fist in the bedding, using every scrap of willpower to take it slow. Inch by inch, out then in, I worked myself deeper until I was seated to the root.

  She winced as I planted myself deep and I cringed. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay.” She shook her head. “It’s not that bad. Just give me a sec.”

  “Take your time.” I hovered above her, careful not to shift until she was ready. When she opened her eyes and gave me a small smile, I smiled back. “You’re amazing, babe.”

  Her shoulders relaxed. “You’re not so bad yourself, Jackson Page.”

  “You ready for the good stuff?”

  She giggled. “Show me what you’ve got.”

  I pressed the base of my cock into her clit, earning a soft purr before pulling out slowly. My strokes began slow and measured, as I wanted to make sure she wasn’t in pain. But when her legs wrapped around my hips, urging me on faster, I lost control.

  Thrust after thrust, I pistoned into her until her moans filled the room. When I reached between us for her clit, it barely took two flicks and she was coming apart, squeezing me so damn tight, I nearly blacked out.

  “Fuck, Willa!” I roared to the ceiling as her inner walls clenched, milking my own release. I kept my hips moving, my finger on her clit, until the stars cleared from my eyes and I collapsed after the most intense orgasm of my life.

  Willa let out a contented sigh as she came down from her high. Her arms wrapped around my back and her legs around my ass.

  “I think you killed me, woman,” I murmured into her hair, making her giggle. I took one last drag of her sweet scent and lifted up to see her face. “Are you okay? Are you hurt? That got a little rougher than I’d planned.”

  “I’m perfect. You were perfect.”

  This woman. She always knew exactly what I needed to hear. “I don’t know what I did to deserve this but thank you. I’m honored you wanted it to be me.”

  Willa swallowed and looked to the ceiling, blinking furiously as she tried to keep the tears away.

  “Come on.” I kissed the tip of her nose, then pulled out of her slowly, knowing she’d be sore. “Let’s take a shower.”

  I stood first, then scooped her up in my arms to carry her into the bathroom. When the water was hot, I helped her under the spray.

  It was a tight space for two people, but we made it work. As she stood close, I took my time washing her hair and body, savoring the steam filled with the smell of her coconut-and-vanilla shampoo. When we were both clean, dry and exhausted, I carried her back to bed and tucked us in.

  “Good night,” Willa whispered, snuggling her back into my chest.

  “Night, babe.” I closed my eyes and relaxed into her down pillows.

  My arms pulled her even closer as peace settled over her dark bedroom. Being here, being Willa’s big spoon, was exactly the right place. Things just felt right.

  “Jackson?”

  “Hmm?”

  Her hand slipped under mine. “Thank you.”

  “For what? Sex?” I chuckled. “You don’t ever have to thank me for sex.”

  “No.” She laughed. “Not for sex. For making a dream come true.”

  She’d done it again. She said things that made my heart beat too hard. She said things that made me unable to speak.

  So I kissed her hair and held her close as she dozed off.

  I was glad I’d been able to give her this dream. Some other man—a man who believed in love—would get her others.

  But at least I’d gotten this one.

  “Morning, babe.” Jackson wrapped his arms around me as I stood at the stove. “What are we trying for breakfast today?”

  I smiled up at him. “French toast.”

  “Sounds good. Want more coffee?”

  “Sure.”

  He kissed my neck before letting me go and grabbing my mug. He went to the other side of my kitchen to refill it, delivering it with another kiss, then he got out his own coffee cup from the cupboard. After he filled it, he leaned against the counter to watch me cook.

  He was wearing nothing more than a pair of navy boxers, his muscles on full display. His eyes were still heavy with sleep as he sipped his coffee. The longer strands of his hair on top were disheveled.

  It was my favorite time with Jackson.

  Had I known how handsome he was in the morning, I would have worked harder to get his attention all those years ago.

  Not even the view of the lake in the spring with the flowers in bloom after a long winter, with the grass neon green and the mountains royal blue in the distance, was as beautiful as the sight of Jackson Page standing in my kitchen drinking coffee.

  It had been over a month since the first night we’d had sex, and Jackson hadn’t slept at his own house once. He’d settled into my tiny loft apartment so quickly it was hard to remember what it had been like here without him.

  “Want to get out the syrup and butter?” I asked. “These are about done.”

  “You bet.” He took his coffee into the living room along with our supplies and put it all down next to the plates I’d already set out.

  I didn’t know how he could sleep through the noise I made in the kitchen each morning, but I figured it was because he was simply dog-tired. He’d gotten here late last night after closing down the bar.

  I’d opted for a night at home instead of keeping him company, and I’d been surprised that he’d had to stay until closing for an early-October Thursday. When I’d called down to the bar to check on him around midnight, he’d told me there’d been a group of bow hunters who’d come in looking to unwind after a long, unsuccessful week of hiking in the mountains. I’d been dead to the world when he’d climbed into bed sometime around three.

  Luckily, neither of us had anywhere to be this morning so we’d slept in and were having a late breakfast.

  I took the final pieces of french toast out of the pan and shut off the stove. Then I gathered it all up and took it into the living room,
setting our food on the coffee table, which doubled as my dining room. I settled into the couch next to Jackson and served him up five pieces.

  I’d made ten because I knew he’d be hungry. That, and because I still hadn’t figured out exactly the right egg-to-bread ratio for two people.

  “Well?” I asked after he’d slathered his toast in butter and syrup and shoved a huge bite in his mouth. “What do you think?”

  He grinned, his mouth full as he spoke. “Love it.”

  “Good.” I smiled, cutting up my own bite.

  I’d been on a mission to teach Jackson about breakfast over the last month. One morning, not long after he’d started sleeping with me, I’d asked him about his favorite breakfast foods. He’d just shrugged, saying that breakfast had never been a big deal and he mostly ate cold cereal.

  I didn’t do cold cereal. And breakfast was a big deal.

  Everyone deserved to wake up to the smell of bacon and warm syrup.

  So I’d taken it upon myself to make breakfast a special meal for him. I didn’t make us feasts every day, mostly just eggs and some kind of meat—his muscles required protein. But once a week, I’d make something new. So far, his favorite was my biscuits and sausage gravy. He’d loved my crepes too.

  There would be no more granola bars, Pop-Tarts or Frosted Flakes if I had anything to say about it.

  “Are you working today?” he asked.

  “Yeah. I need to go in for a little while and pay some bills. And I want to make sure everything on my checklist is done for winter.”

  We’d had a few cold nights this past week where the temperature had dropped to nearly freezing. The last thing I needed at camp was a broken water pipe, so I was going to triple-check that we were prepped for snow.

  “You don’t have to be at the bar until four, right? Want to come with me?”

  He shook his head, swallowing a bite. “I can’t, babe. Sorry. Thea wants me to come down to talk about a few things.”

  “What things? Is she okay?”

  “She’s good. I’m sure she just wants to go over some numbers. She likes to bore me to death with the bar’s finances at least once a month.”

  I giggled. “Don’t ever let my mother know how much you hate accounting, okay? It would crush her.”

 

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