by Devney Perry
“Mom left you too?”
Jackson nodded. “Yeah. She did.”
“But she never came back?”
“No.”
Ryder’s head fell, his entire frame slumping in his seat. “She comes back for me.”
My teeth gritted together. The cold from earlier was completely gone now that I was angry. Jackson had suspected she’d left him before, and he’d been right.
I hated Melissa Page. That woman was such a bitch.
“She’s left you before?” Jackson asked.
Ryder nodded. “She does it a lot. She leaves me for a while, then comes back to get me. She promised me last time was it. That we were coming up here to see you and be a family. But it was just more of her bullshit.”
The curse word from his mouth startled me.
Ryder cussed with ease, so I knew it wasn’t the first time. I didn’t like that it made him sound much older than twelve. He shouldn’t have things to cuss about at that age, not yet.
Though for his mother, I’d say bullshit too.
“So she comes back?” Jackson asked.
“Yeah. She disappears but comes back eventually to take me with her.”
“Not this time.” Jackson shook his head. “She’s not taking you again. You’re here.”
Ryder studied Jackson’s face, like he didn’t believe that could be true. “Really?”
“Really, kid. We’ll make sure she can’t take you again.”
Tears welled in Ryder’s brown eyes. He sniffled, trying to clear them up, but a week’s worth of high emotions was too much. He broke down, slouching in his seat, and cried. Jackson’s hand stayed on his knee the entire time.
Jackson looked at me, his face a mixture of fury at his mother and pain for his brother. I gave him a reassuring smile and hoped he knew he wasn’t in this alone.
Melissa Page might not realize it yet, but she’d lost both of her sons. Now that they’d found each other, they wouldn’t need her ever again.
It took a few minutes for Ryder to calm down, and when he did, he pulled in few shaking breaths before looking at Jackson. “I don’t want to go with her again.”
“You won’t,” Jackson declared. “I’ll go talk to a lawyer on Monday. We’ll figure out a way for me to become your legal guardian. But that means you need to tell us all about the past. I gotta know what happened with you and Mom. No surprises.”
“Okay.” Ryder nodded. “Like what do you want to know?”
“Well, to start, let’s go over where you were living. Las Vegas, right?”
Ryder had given us enough information about his school that I’d been able to call and get the records transferred up to Lark Cove. But other than the school’s name in Las Vegas, we didn’t know much else. They would only transfer the records to the school so I hadn’t gotten to see them.
“Yeah. We lived in Vegas for a while with Mom’s boyfriend. Christopher.” Ryder rolled his eyes. “He’s an asshole.”
“Why’d you guys leave Vegas?”
“Christopher dumped Mom. They got in a big fight one night, and the next morning, Mom loaded us up and drove us to Denver. That’s when she got the idea to come looking for you.”
Because she’d needed a place to leave her kid.
“Where did you live before Vegas?” I asked Ryder.
“All over. Kansas. Alabama. Iowa. I was born in West Virginia.”
Which meant after Melissa had abandoned Jackson in New York, she likely hadn’t gone back to Pennsylvania where he’d been born. She’d slowly made her way out West.
“What kind of jobs did she have?” Jackson asked.
Ryder shrugged. “None really. She always had a guy or something. A couple times we lived alone, but it never lasted.”
“And who’d she leave you with when she’d disappear?” I asked. “Was it other family? Or your dad?”
“No. I don’t know my dad. She never told me his name. Mostly, she left me with her friends and neighbors. It was never for long. A couple weeks and then she’d be back. The longest was a month.”
If that pattern continued, it meant she’d be back and back soon.
As harsh as it sounded in my head, I wished she’d do to Ryder what she’d done to Jackson—leave and never look back. It would be hard for Ryder, but I still felt like it would be better for him never to see that woman again.
“Did she say she was coming back?” Jackson asked.
Ryder shook his head. “Not this time.”
Jackson and I shared a look, wishing for the exact same thing.
We both wanted Melissa Page to just become a bad memory.
The fishing pole in the holder whizzed and the line strung tight, ending our conversation. Jackson and Ryder both jumped into action, springing for the reel. I took out my phone and walked to the back of the boat, videoing the entire thing as the guys brought in a beautiful rainbow trout.
We took a picture, commemorating Ryder’s first fish, then set it free.
After the excitement from the first fish, we didn’t talk about Ryder’s past again or their mother. We just enjoyed our afternoon and looked on as Ryder caught three other fish.
I’d made us peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the boat, but by the time we made it back to Jackson’s house and parked the boat in his garage, I was starving.
“I’m so hungry,” Ryder and I said it at the same time, then shared a look and laughed.
“How about we all get cleaned up and go out to dinner in Kalispell?” Jackson suggested as we all came inside the house and piled coats onto his living room couch.
“Sounds great.” I smiled.
“Cool! I’ll get in the shower.” Ryder disappeared down the hall to his room on the other side of the house from Jackson’s bedroom.
“I know what I want for my birthday,” Jackson said, stepping close.
“What’s that?”
He bent and gave me a soft kiss, pressing his hips and the growing bulge behind his jeans forward. “Shower with me?”
I let out a soft moan. “Well, I might have gotten you a little something else, but a shower sounds nice too.”
I’d gotten him a new pair of boots for his birthday. The soles of his others were coming loose so I’d splurged. These were the same style as the ones he already had, but new and the nicest brand on the market.
“Maybe we should get a little dirty before we clean up?” I whispered as he kissed my neck.
“I like the way you think, Willow.”
“Willow? You jerkface!” I poked his side, trying not to laugh.
He grinned. “Still too soon to joke about that, huh?”
“Since it’s your birthday I’ll let it slide.”
“Thanks.” He kissed me again, this time letting his tongue linger a bit on my bottom lip. He pulled away, but instead of heat in his eyes and a playful grin, Jackson’s face had a hint of worry.
“What’s wrong?”
He sighed. “I just keep thinking that she’ll be back.”
“Me too. But if she does, then we’ll deal.”
He dropped his forehead to mine. “Thanks for everything. For helping get Ryder settled this week. For helping me.”
“You don’t have to thank me.” I wrapped my arms around his waist, snuggling into his chest. “We’re a team.”
He hummed.
But he didn’t say anything else.
“So what’s new?” Hannah asked me and Leighton. She was sitting across from us in a booth at Bob’s Diner. “You two have been so busy lately we’ve hardly seen you.”
I sighed. “Sorry. Things have just been a little crazy.”
It had been a month since the fishing expedition on Jackson’s birthday. Ryder was getting into a rhythm at school. Jackson was adjusting to being a stand-in parent. And I was doing everything in my power to help them both, which meant dinner with my girlfriends had been skipped—a lot.
Actually, dinners with June and Hannah had been few and far between ever since I’d
started dating Jackson. I’d canceled on dinner with them more times than accepted, mostly to spend time with him.
Truth be told, I didn’t really feel like being here tonight either, but the guilt of being a bad friend had eaten away at me. When Hannah had called, I hadn’t been able to say no.
Ryder was sleeping over at the cottage tonight with Hazel, and what I really wanted was to spend the evening with Jackson at the bar, then sleep at my apartment, since we hadn’t been there in forever.
But I also missed the girls, especially Leighton.
“How are things going with Brendon?” June asked Leighton, waggling her eyebrows.
My best friend smiled that dreamy smile she’d been wearing for months. “Amazing.”
“They’re in love.” I swooned, nudging her shoulder with my own.
“We so are.” Leighton and Brendon were nearly inseparable these days, and she’d missed about as many girls’ dinners as I had.
While I hadn’t seen much of Hannah or June, Leighton and I always made time for each other. She knew all about me and Jackson. I knew all about her and Brendon. And I had a hunch that those two would be headed down the aisle before long.
I was overjoyed that she’d found a man who loved her unconditionally. And that she’d found someone to confide in about her assault besides me.
“Aren’t you jealous, Willa?” June teased. “She took your man.”
“No.” I laughed, toying with the paper wrapper I’d stripped from my straw. “I have a man, thank you very much.”
“How are things going with Jackson?” Hannah asked.
“Wonderful.”
“Obviously,” June said, fanning her face. “I mean just look at that man. Those eyes. That ass. He’s so damn hot. I bet he’s good in bed too. God knows he’s had a lot of practice. If there was a guy I wanted to fool around with before finding my husband, I’d pick Jackson too.”
My entire body stilled. “We’re not fooling around. We’re together.”
“Oh, Willa.” She gave me a pitying smile. “Come on. Jackson’s not that kind of guy.”
“What kind of guy?”
“The kind you marry. He’s the one you fuck senseless before you find the guy to settle down with and have kids.”
“What? That’s not . . . no. It’s not like that.”
Somehow in a matter of seconds, she’d cheapened my most special relationship. And she made him out to be some kind of insensitive man whore. Yes, Jackson had experience and I hated thinking about it. But none of that mattered now. It was in the past and his future was with me.
“Have you guys talked about getting married?” Hannah asked.
“Um, no.”
Hannah and June shared a smug look.
“They don’t need to talk about that yet,” Leighton said, coming to my defense.
“Have you and Brendon talked about it?” June asked.
“Well, yeah. But Willa and Jackson are different.”
We are? “Why?”
“Not in a bad way,” Leighton said. “You’re just at a different point in your relationship. Brendon and I are moving at warp speed, talking about getting married and having kids. We both want that. You and Jackson are still getting to know one another. You’re not as serious yet.”
Not as serious? Had she not been listening to me during all of our phone calls when I’d spilled my guts about every tidbit of my relationship?
“We are just as serious. I love Jackson.” I hadn’t told him yet, but he knew. Didn’t he? And he loved me too. There’s no way we could connect like we did and not be in love.
“You can love someone without marrying them,” Hannah said.
“You can fuck someone without marrying them too,” June snickered.
“Stop it. Stop saying f-fuck.”
She rolled her eyes. “Sorry. I didn’t realize we were back in high school.”
“I don’t care if you say fuck.” Gosh, it sounds stupid when I cuss. “I just don’t like you saying it when it comes to me and Jackson. We’re not just having casual sex. We have something special.”
“I’m just trying to be your friend,” Hannah said. “Jackson doesn’t seem like a guy who wants the whole marriage, babies, Sunday-brunch-with-your-parents thing. He’s what, five years older than we are?”
“Six,” I corrected now that he’d had his birthday.
“Whatever. Don’t you think if he wanted to get married, he would have by now?”
The sting of angry—no, furious—tears pricked my eyes. Jackson hadn’t gotten married because he hadn’t found the right woman yet. Me.
I refused to believe anything else.
Why couldn’t my friends just be supportive? Why did they always make me feel ridiculous and naïve?
I dug into my purse and yanked out some cash from my wallet. We’d ordered, but it hadn’t arrived yet, so I threw it down in the middle of our empty table, then slid out of the booth with my purse and winter coat in hand.
“Willa,” Leighton said. “Wait. We didn’t mean to make you upset.”
I turned around. “None of you know how my relationship works. None of you know Jackson. All you’ve ever made me feel was pathetic for having a crush on him.”
“It is,” June muttered.
Hannah shushed her and Leighton shot her a glare.
“You know what’s pathetic?” I snapped at June, stepping right up to the table. “You. You come here and try to embarrass me with all your talk of sex and fucking. You try to make me feel stupid for loving a man who deserves it. I don’t give a crap what you think about Jackson or me. It’s none of your damn business, so butt out.”
All three faces at the table stared up at me like I’d gone bonkers. My outburst was so out of character it even surprised me a bit.
“He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” I told them. “He might not be ready to get married today, but you know what? Neither am I. And the bottom line is, it is none. Of. Your. Business.”
With that, I spun back around and marched for the door. I wasted no time getting into my car and peeling out of the parking lot, driving straight to the bar.
I drove straight to the man who’d make it all better.
“Hey, babe.” Jackson smiled as I walked through the door. But as I stomped across the room, my shoes crunching peanut shells, his smile dropped. “Uh-oh. What happened at dinner? Did they burn your cheeseburger?”
“No.” I slumped into a stool. “I kind of yelled at my friends.”
He chuckled. “They must have deserved it then. My girl doesn’t get riled up much.”
They had deserved it. Maybe. June had for sure. Except I felt bad for lumping Leighton into the mix, and Hannah had been genuinely trying to give me advice.
Jackson walked around the corner of the bar, taking the stool next to mine. He spun me to face him so my legs were between his.
“What happened?” he asked gently.
“Nothing.” I waved it off. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Discussing the diner situation would involve me asking Jackson if he wanted to get married and I didn’t want to freak him out.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“Yeah. I’m just glad to be here now.”
“Me too.” He leaned forward, giving me a soft kiss.
“See?” I whispered. “All better.”
He cupped my face in his hand and I leaned into his palm. We sat there, just staring at one another for a moment until the door opened and Leighton walked in with apology written all over her face.
“Hey, Leighton,” he greeted.
“Hi, Jackson.”
“I’ll give you two a minute.” He slid off his stool, kissing my forehead. “Are you hungry?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t eat.”
“Okay. I’ll make you something. Be back.”
Leighton took the seat Jackson had abandoned as he strode behind the bar and disappeared down the hall toward the kitchen.
&n
bsp; “I’m sorry,” we both said at the same time, then laughed.
“You were right,” she said. “It’s your relationship. Don’t let any of us tell you what’s right or wrong. Just follow your heart.”
“He is my heart. He always has been.”
Leighton smiled. “I know. And there’s nothing pathetic about that.”
“June thinks so.”
She scoffed. “June is jealous and always has been, which makes her opinion invalid.”
“Maybe,” I muttered. “I still feel bad for snapping at her and Hannah.”
“Don’t feel bad. They deserved it, we all did. I’m glad you stood up for yourself.”
It wasn’t so much me I’d stood up for but my relationship with Jackson. Where he was concerned, I had a lot more spirit than usual.
“I’m starving.” Leighton’s stomach growled. “Would you care if I invited Brendon down to share a pizza?”
I smiled. “Not at all.”
Two hours later, my bad mood from the diner was gone and my stomach was full of my favorite pizza.
“I like the way he looks at you,” I told Leighton after Brendon excused himself for the restroom.
She giggled. “I was just thinking the exact same thing about Jackson.”
I looked down the bar, where Jackson was cashing out a customer’s tab. He gave me a wink when he caught me watching.
“Can I ask you something?”
She nodded. “Of course.”
“When did you tell Brendon you loved him?” The pair had said it a couple of times throughout the night. It had been lovey-dovey and so cute.
Leighton and I had been talking constantly about our boyfriends, but I hadn’t asked her for specifics about when they’d exchanged the words. I just knew they said them and often.
“About a month ago. Why?”
I shrugged. “Just curious. Did he say it first?”
“Technically, no.” She smiled. “We were at his place one Friday night about a month ago and we’d each had a few glasses of wine. He was all glassy-eyed and smiley. We started kissing, but then he stopped and asked, ‘Do you love me?’ I couldn’t lie to him so . . . I said it. Then he said it back.”
Leighton looked over her shoulder to make sure Brendon wasn’t coming back, then she leaned in close. “He was so happy that he let me sit on his face for almost an hour.”
