by J. S. Scott
“I think she might feel better knowing you’re alive,” Zane answered drily.
“Not yet. Please.” Ellie knew Chloe, and she’d be heartsick if she saw her right now, emaciated and torn up from James’s frequent beatings. She didn’t want her best friend to see her as she was now, not when Chloe had been through so much herself.
“Stop worrying about Chloe. She’s doing a hell of a lot better than you are right now. Do you need anything?” Zane asked hesitantly, looking impatient, like he needed something to occupy himself.
She was going to need a lot of things, but she refused to think about that right now. “No. How long have I been here?”
“Two days,” he answered gruffly.
“I don’t remember,” she admitted, unable to recall her transport to the hospital.
“Totally understandable,” Zane informed her. “You were confused because of the dehydration. Luckily, there shouldn’t be any permanent damage once you’re completely healed. Now that you’re getting what you need, everything will correct itself. It will take time to put some weight back on, and you’ll need time to recover from the weakness, but it’s all reversible.”
Ellie noticed that Zane looked completely done in. His expression was weary, his eyes were bloodshot, and there were shadows beneath those expressive gray eyes.
“Have you slept at all? You have a house here in Denver, right? Maybe you should go home and get some rest.” Even as she said the words, her heart lurched at the thought of him leaving her alone. Rationally, she knew she was out of danger, but she selfishly wanted Zane to stay with her for a little while longer.
“Do you honestly think I’m going anywhere? Jesus! I tore up most of Colorado looking for you. I’m not leaving,” he said stubbornly, crossing his arms over his broad chest.
“Then at least sleep tonight.” She glanced out the window, noticing it was dark. There was an extra bed in the room right next to her.
“I can’t believe you’re worried about me. Christ, Ellie. You nearly died, and spent seven months in chains. Me getting some sleep is not a fucking priority.”
She knew if she started to relive the last several months, she’d end up a mess. “Sometimes it’s easier not to think about it. I’m here now. I’m alive. All because of you. I’m getting good care, and I’m awake and talking. There’s no reason for you not to rest.”
“I’ll lie down once you sleep again. I have a feeling it won’t be long.”
Ellie’s eyelids were already feeling heavy, but she fought the welcoming void of darkness, where she knew she’d forget what happened for the moment. “When can I go home?”
“When the doctors say it’s safe,” Zane said testily.
“I don’t even know if I still have a home. I have no vehicle. I don’t have a job.” She started to hyperventilate as she thought about all she’d lost. She had been broke before she took the job with James, and she hadn’t worked there long enough to even get her first check.
“Don’t worry about any of that right now,” Zane ordered firmly. “Everything will work itself out. You can come home with me. You won’t have fully regained your strength when you leave here, and you still have injuries to heal and nutritional deficiencies.”
Her chin lifted. “I can take care of myself.” The last thing Ellie needed was Zane’s pity.
“You’re going to be stubborn after everything that’s happened? You can’t take a little help from friends?”
“I may not have a choice,” Ellie admitted. She didn’t know if her apartment was still hers, she had no source of income, and no way to even get around to apply for a job.
“As far as I’m concerned, you don’t have options. I’m taking you home with me even if I have to toss you over my shoulder and drag you there. You need help, and after what happened, I don’t want you out of my sight.”
Friends? Were she and Zane really friends? Yeah, back in high school she would have said they were, even though she’d also been majorly infatuated with him. But she’d only seen him a handful of times since then, and they hadn’t spoken much. Really, he was the brother of her best friend and just some guy she’d had a crush on in her early years of high school. He had no reason to be stuck to her like glue. Nevertheless, he obviously cared about what happened to her.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Ellie confessed. “I’m feeling a little lost.” Actually she was feeling plenty lost, but didn’t want to admit it. Since she was physically weak, the obstacles in front of her seemed overwhelming. Psychologically, she was finding herself almost incapable of not panicking about her future.
“Someday, you’ll have to deal with what happened to you. But that day is not today. You need rest and you need to get well. I’ll be right here. I’m not going anywhere,” Zane told her tenaciously.
Ellie shuddered, dreading the time when she’d need to deal with her confinement, the memories of never knowing if the next time James came to the cabin he’d bring supplies…or just kill her off.
Feeling like she had heavy weights on her eyelids, she gave up the struggle of staying awake and closed them. “Someday,” she whispered, wondering if she’d ever be strong enough to actually talk about her experiences when trying to forget seemed so much easier.
“Sleep, Ellie,” Zane said in a deep, hypnotic voice, his hand reaching for hers. He clasped it tightly.
Her first instinct was to flinch away from his touch since every bit of human contact in the last seven months had led to pain. Eventually, the gentleness of his comforting gesture made her relax again. She tried to squeeze his fingers, but everything was too much effort. Taking comfort in the fact that Zane was nearby, she slept.
Ellie spent a lot of time sleeping the next few days. Her mom came to see her, and they had a very joyful but short reunion since her mother had a business to help run with her husband back in Montana. Knowing her sole parent had experienced more than her fair share of poverty in the past, the last thing Ellie wanted was for her ordeal to force her mom back into financial difficulties. Her mother still lived from day-to-day financially, never knowing how much the business was going to make that month. But Ellie was glad her mom had a warm home to sleep in, food on the table, and a husband who loved her. Her mom was finally happy, and Ellie didn’t want to do anything to take away that contentment.
Aileen, the Colter matriarch, was a frequent visitor, as were Tate and Lara Colter, Chloe’s youngest brother and his wife.
Chloe’s sister-in-law was in the process of setting up counseling sessions for Ellie with the same therapist that she’d recommended to Chloe, a Dr. Natalie Townson. Apparently, she was one of the best psychologists in the world for women with domestic abuse issues.
Ellie wasn’t sure how domestic her experience had been, but it had definitely been traumatic and violent. Even now, she could still see James’s evil face, hear his harsh, brutal words pushing their way into her head, and remember his powerful blows. It was hard to close her eyes without seeing him, remembering everything. Little by little, her time as a captive was all coming back to her. The images were vivid at times, so real that she struggled to convince herself she was safe.
Sometimes she wished the memories had stayed hidden or vague within her brain, but whether she liked it or not, she was remembering. Recently, her nightmares were so intense that she woke up terrified and gasping for breath. Luckily, she’d never made much noise during her bad dreams because Zane never woke up, though he slept in the other bed in her room every single night.
Some nights, she wanted to reach out to him, but stopped herself. She’d always taken care of herself. Maybe money was tight, but she’d managed, both emotionally and physically. It was important that she get back to where she was before: a self-sufficient woman who did just fine being alone. That meant she had to learn to deal with her own issues, even the nightmares.
During the busy days of visitors
and treatments at the hospital, Ellie ate just like a woman who had been deprived of food for months. Starting off slow, she’d finally progressed to solid food, and she was constantly starving. Unfortunately, the hospital food left much to be desired, but she ate every single bite, her remembered fear of going hungry and thirsty still haunting her.
Zane’s constant presence was the only thing that made her feel safe. He was always around, always present. He slept in the bed next to her, his protective company easing some of the fear she felt when she woke up abruptly and was terrified. Just seeing him in a bed beside her was enough to calm herself down.
I can’t cling to him. I can’t get used to him being around.
She sighed as she turned off her Kindle, a gift from Zane to keep her from going stir-crazy, and set it beside the bed. Today had been quiet. Her mom had gone back to Montana, and no one had come to visit yet. Even Zane was strangely absent.
I can’t expect him to sit around here and baby me forever. He’s an important man with a very large company to run.
Just as the thought ran through her head, Zane came through the door, closing it behind him.
“What’s that?” She nodded to the enormous bag in his arms.
“Contraband,” he answered with a rare grin. “We both know hospital food sucks.”
Her breath hitched as she watched a mischievous look cross his irresistibly handsome face. When Zane smiled, it was nearly infectious. At least it was for her. He was always so serious that his naughty expression made her heart skitter and warmth spread through her entire body.
Ellie watched as he pulled out several large containers of Chinese food, then some junk food, and finally a bag of her favorite specialty chocolate. He pulled paper plates from the bag and loaded one up before he placed it in front of her with plastic utensils. “Eat,” he insisted as he dropped the candies next to her plate, and then pulled out a soda and opened it for her.
The smell of the Oriental cuisine made her mouth water. Chinese was her favorite. “How did you know?” He’d ordered her favorite dishes.
He hesitated before answering. “You and Chloe used to go for Chinese a lot. I figured you liked it.”
“And the candy?” It was her favorite, and she didn’t buy it often because it was pricey.
He shrugged. “It’s chocolate, right? You like chocolate. Or at least you did when we were younger.”
Ellie was convinced that it was his scientific mind that had led to a couple of very good educated guesses.
“That’s my favorite, too. Thank you.” Unable to wait any longer for her first decent meal in months, Ellie picked up her fork and prepared to dig into her food. “At least I won’t have to feel guilty about eating a ton of carbs and chocolate.”
Zane frowned at her. “Why would you feel that way at all?”
She rolled her eyes. “I used to be fat, Zane. If I keep eating like this, I’ll gain all that weight back.”
“Good. You were never fat. Eat,” he insisted.
She had been overweight, but she wasn’t right now, and she actually needed to put on some pounds, a novel experience for her since she had been chubby since she was a child. Being able to eat without guilt was the only bright spot in this otherwise nightmarish experience.
As she shoveled food into her mouth, she could feel Zane watching her, but when she looked at him, he looked away and started filling a plate for himself.
Between bites, she told him, “God, this is either really amazing food, or I’m so hungry that anything more edible than hospital food tastes good.”
“It’s good,” Zane confirmed, seating himself in a chair next to her bed and starting to eat. “It’s the best Asian food in the area. I’ve tried every one of them. It’s one of my favorites, too.”
Ellie watched him covertly as she ate, her heart flip-flopping just as it always did whenever she saw Zane. Now that he was her rescuer, it made her youthful infatuation spring to life again.
It’s hero worship. It has to be. Zane was responsible for saving my life. I absolutely am not really attracted to him.
Irritatingly, Ellie had to acknowledge that she wasn’t totally convinced her desire to devour him along with her food wasn’t all about the fact that Zane saved her.
Something about Zane Colter had always attracted her like a giant magnet. She’d never figured out whether it was because he was amazingly smart, or if it was the fact that he was the hottest guy she’d ever seen. His dark hair was a little too long, and occasionally some of those black tresses fell onto his forehead, making him seem more approachable. He had the trademark Colter eyes, gray and ever-changing in shade, depending on his mood.
She could say Zane was nice, but one would never know it. She knew because she was acquainted with him, but he was often distracted or quiet, not because he was a jerk, but because he simply had nothing to say.
Ellie was pretty sure he didn’t give a damn about status, or what kind of clothing he wore. Mostly, she’d seen him in jeans and flannel shirts. In the summer, he opted for a T-shirt. His big feet were usually in a pair of hiking boots, and his hair had no semblance of order or even a definitive cut. Nope. He definitely wasn’t a guy who spent a lot of time trying to look trendy. He never had been. Maybe that’s why she’d always liked him. He was naturally hotter than hell, but never acted like he knew it.
He had been as socially awkward as she had back in high school. While people said he was shy, she’d never seen him that way. Problem was, Zane was too smart to be happy having a conversation he thought was irrelevant. He’d been too busy trying to figure out every scientific mystery that existed on the planet. Most other high school guys had just wanted to get laid.
“I’m stuffed,” she groaned as she pushed her plate back.
He looked up from his plate. “You hardly ate anything.”
“My stomach is smaller,” she informed him.
“You’re too skinny,” he replied gruffly.
Ellie laughed. “I’ve never had that problem before.” She was still thin, but now that she was being pumped full of nutrition and hydrated, it probably wouldn’t take long for her to gain weight. It never did.
She smiled at him, liking the fact that he was blunt and always said whatever he was thinking. His words were rarely censored, and he didn’t seem to care whether they were tactful or not.
“They’re going to let you go home in a few days. I thought we could go to my house in Denver, but it’s a media circus outside. I think you’d be safer in Rocky Springs. My property there is secure, and if they set one foot on Colter land, they’ll be arrested. We can take off from the helipad on the roof.”
“Zane, I can’t go home with you. I’ll stay with Aileen for a while if I need to, try to figure out what I’m going to do. You’ve already lost enough time trying to find me and then taking care of me. I’m going to have to get my shit together pretty fast.”
“You’re staying with me, even if I have to toss you over my shoulder and take you to my house. Mom’s home isn’t secure. Hell, she doesn’t even have an alarm system. My property is fenced. I have a small lab there, and it needed to be secure.” He took her plate and started to finish off her food after dumping his own empty dish into the garbage.
“My apartment—”
“It’s been rented. All of your stuff was sent to my house, and the furniture was put in storage.”
Ellie’s heart sank. “I didn’t think my landlady would evict me.”
In a kinder voice, Zane answered, “Nobody believed you were even alive anymore, Ellie. You were gone seven months. She didn’t exactly evict you.”
You believed it, or you wouldn’t have kept searching. Ellie still wondered why Zane had kept searching when even the police had given up hope of finding her alive.
She sighed and started plucking at the white blanket nervously. “I suppose. Life moved o
n without me.”
“Not for everybody. And never for me,” Zane told her in a graveled voice as he dumped her now-empty plate and opened the bag of candy.
“Why didn’t you and Chloe give up? Why didn’t you just assume I was dead or gone?” Ellie knew Zane was analytical and realistic. He was a scientist. After seven months gone, the likelihood of him finding her alive had been pretty much nil. A brain that was as rational as Zane’s should have told him to quit looking.
He pinned her with his intense stare, his eyes smoky and dark. He took one of the chocolates he’d unwrapped and held it to her mouth.
It was a strange sensation, having a guy feed her, but she opened her lips and sucked in the round chocolate, the explosive taste of sweetness making her bite back a moan of pleasure.
Finally, Zane answered, “Because I didn’t want to believe it, Ell. Until I had positive proof that you were gone, I wasn’t going to stop looking for you. It’s as simple as that.”
The use of his shortened version of her name surprised her. Nobody had ever called her that but him, and not since they were teenagers. She’d always kind of liked it when they were young. Ellie looked up at him, mesmerized by the fierce expression on his face. Zane was a scientist. Of course he would have wanted to find her body for her family and Chloe, but she sensed his reasons were somehow…different. Like a personal mission he wasn’t willing to stop. “But there was no hope.”
“Bullshit. I always had hope, Ellie. I know you well enough to know you’re a fighter, and so does Chloe. Neither one of us ever believed the bullshit assumption that you just left in your vehicle and never came back. It made no sense. Both of us discounted that theory as soon as the police threw it out.”
Thank God for that! If he hadn’t been so tenacious, she’d be dead by now.
“Thank you,” she whispered. “I’m grateful you never gave up on finding me.” If he had stopped looking for her, she wouldn’t have lasted much longer alone. Her doctors had told her bluntly she probably couldn’t have survived another day without water, food, or warmth.