Thadias and Bob thought her continued silence was a mistake but she felt it was the right thing to do. When she saw photo after photo of Diesel with a new bombshell on his arm, she knew she’d made the right choice to let him have his life while she maintained her own.
He’d worked hard for his success and he deserved to enjoy it. She had no intentions of ruining it for him but she didn’t want to be too close to it either. She had limits.
Diesel had never once attempted to contact her after he’d returned to school. That alone had proven her point. She was nothing more than another woman in a long list who’d been one-night-stands. She’d known that before she broke down on the side of the road that long-ago night.
She accepted the consequences of her decision for Diesel to be her first and didn’t have a single regret.
She knew her family thought she was being a doormat. They didn’t understand her reasons and she’d grown tired of trying to explain them.
MacKenzie knew firsthand what it was like to have your dreams taken from you.
She wasn’t going to do that to anyone – especially not the father of her son. One day, far in the future, she’d contact him for Dalton’s sake. Until then, distance and secrecy was the best option.
Nothing either man said could convince her otherwise.
Dalton was the spitting image of his father. Tall for his age, black hair, and blue eyes. He was gorgeous. He’d turned three a few months ago and she worked with him during the day just as she had with her brother and sisters when they were kids.
He was already able to write his ABCs and was on his way to being able to read without her help. One of his favorite things to do was hug and Kenzie welcomed as many of them as he felt like sharing. He ate constantly and had a huge laugh.
Thadias was his favorite person to hang with and they kept one another company at night while she worked and went to school. Dalton had gotten so sweet about letting her catch a little sleep. He was a very good little boy and no matter the circumstances, she was grateful for him.
Despite occasional struggles, Kenzie’s life was much easier than it was when she’d lived at home. She was in control of her destiny now and she was moving in the right direction.
Her siblings were good to her and visited often. Her brother dated regularly but was glad to step in as a surrogate dad to his nephew.
She worked hard, studied harder, and tried to be the best mom she could be. That would have to be enough because she couldn’t afford daydreams or happily-ever-after. Those things weren’t made for people like her but she’d make sure her son had them.
Every Sunday, she had all day off before she went to work at night. That was their skating day. They’d spend all day on the outdoor rinks and have hot chocolate when they got cold. Her Devil’s sweatshirt usually earned her a few dirty looks and she’d just smile.
MacKenzie and Dalton came back from skating with red cheeks and laughing eyes. She drew up short when Thadias turned to face her. He was standing in front of the television. She knew from the look on his face that something big had happened.
“He’s been traded to the Bruins, Kenzie.”
“I like hockey, Mommy,” Dalton told her firmly.
“I know you do, baby.” She took him to games when she could and he found it fascinating. To her brother, she said quietly, “That’s impossible. He has a four-year contract with the Devils, Thad.”
“They traded their gold mine for two key positions they’ve been shopping for. The deal for him is outrageous. He just did a press conference in his new Bruins jersey.” Thad rewound the footage and replayed the news story.
He looks so good.
MacKenzie sat down hard on the sofa, her mind spinning. “Who dat, Mommy?” Dalton asked her bluntly. Oh, god…
“That’s an old friend of Mommy’s. His name is Diesel LeBlanc.”
“He plays hockey?” At her nod he said, “I like hockey. Maybe he’d play wit’ me?”
Just like that, her mind exploded with possibilities. Father and son practicing on an outdoor rink. Diesel being in their lives. There was no doubt he’d be a good father if given the chance but she knew she would never be part of the deal.
What the hell was happening?
MacKenzie got up and busied herself cleaning. The place was practically sterile by the time she had to go shower and get ready for work. She came out to say goodbye to the only two men in her life. Her brother and her son…pathetic.
“Kenzie…you should think about it.” Thadias was staring at her intently.
She shook her head. There was no way she could handle Diesel being so close. No way should she be thinking any of the ridiculous thoughts she had in her head.
She wasn’t a child and this wasn’t a fairytale.
“I left lasagna and salad in the fridge for dinner. Reheat and eat. Dalton, no sweets and no drinks after Uncle Thad tells you bedtime, okay? Be good and I love you.” She bent to kiss his soft hair and he grabbed her for a big hug. She took it greedily and there were tears in her eyes when she set him back on the couch. She ruffled Thad’s hair and blew him a kiss on her way out the door.
The bar was packed and everyone was talking about the Bruins’ chances for the Stanley Cup this year now that they’d gotten LeBlanc.
MacKenzie was ready to crawl out of her own skin. Diesel’s name was on the lips of every patron, co-worker, and supplier.
On her break, she called Thad and got a report on Dalton. He was already out cold. “He had two huge servings of lasagna, Kenzie. That boy is either going to weigh five-hundred pounds or become one beast of an athlete. Either way, our groceries are going faster and faster.”
She laughed and told him even he had eaten them out of house and home as a growing boy. They talked for a few more minutes and she went back inside.
Tips were excellent because everyone seemed like they were in a great mood. The owner put her behind the bar since she was the fastest at hooking up the floor servers with their table orders. She’d filled three dozen pitchers with beer, made countless hard liquor drinks, and mixed four batches of margaritas for a table in the back having a bachelorette party.
She exhaled roughly as she stepped back out on the floor. After she checked her tables, she turned toward the bar. Suddenly her hand was grabbed and she was spun around.
“MacKenzie? Kenzie? What are you doing here?”
Oh holy shit…
Diesel stared down at her, shock clearly written all over his face. How he managed to look even better in person than he did on television, she couldn’t imagine.
Her lips parted to murmur some sort of hello when the bar went crazy. Someone recognized him and his Bruins teammates, screaming, “LeBlanc!” He was swarmed for autographs and photos. She took the chance to slip away.
Chapter Six
Ohmygod…ohmygod…ohmygod. Now what?
MacKenzie worked her ass off as the bar filled beyond capacity. News spread in the neighborhood that three of the Bruins were in the building.
She’d never felt so simultaneously relieved and devastated when the players left. She cashed out and grabbed her Devils jacket, shrugging it on as she headed to her truck.
Busy looking for her keys, she ran right into a brick wall wearing a Bruins jersey.
“Nice jacket, Kenzie.” She glanced up and smiled warily at Diesel.
“Yeah, I knew one of the players once. He’s really good.” She found her keys and stepped past him to the driver’s side door, unlocked it, and threw her backpack inside.
He turned her to him by her shoulders. The movement was gentle but insistent. “Kenzie, what the hell are you doing in Boston? How long have you been here?”
“Almost four years. Thadias got into Harvard.” She was ready to pass out from stress and she knew her heart rate was through the roof. What was she supposed to say? Never had she expected to meet him like this. She didn’t know how to handle it.
“Harvard? Holy shit, good for Thad. You decided to
cut and run, huh? I’m glad for you.” He squeezed her shoulders once and let her go. “You look…really great, MacKenzie.”
“Thanks. So do you, Diesel.” Kenzie’s voice was hoarse and she almost dodged past him and tore away in her vehicle. She cleared her throat carefully. “Congratulations on the trade. Your career is going great. I knew it would.” She glanced around the parking lot. “Well, listen, I have to get home. It was really great to see you.”
“Husband?” She laughed loudly before she could catch herself. “Boyfriend? Significant other?” She shook her head. “Interesting. I find myself faced with a gorgeous, seemingly unattached MacKenzie Rhodes and lots of bad thoughts.”
“I’m sure you do, Diesel but I’m tired and I have an early day tomorrow. The appearance of three Bruins in the bar pushed me beyond my endurance for people and serving drinks with a smile.”
“Then come grab some food with me. I’m starving.” She laughed, not able to help herself. “I’m always starving, Kenzie. I’m a big guy. Come eat pancakes with me. Catch me up on everything with you.” She meant to say no but nodded her head yes instead. “Excellent, let me drive you.”
“No! I’ll follow you, Diesel.” He quirked a brow at her and she explained. “I can’t be out too late. I won’t be able to function tomorrow. No need for you to backtrack.”
“Alrighty then.” He gave her a wink and ran to his Navigator. A moment later, he was idling in front of her, waiting for her to reverse to follow.
She talked to herself the entire drive. “What are you doing, Kenzie? This is a bad idea. A very bad idea. Tell him something came up. Get out of this.” But when he pulled into a local diner, she parked and got out. He jogged over and tugged her to the entry door with his arm around her shoulders.
The man smells delicious. Even better than she remembered. His hair was shorter but still shaggy. His eyes watched her intently as they waited to be directed to a table.
The older woman who managed the place glanced out of the kitchen with a smile. “Sit anywhere you like and we’ll be right with you. Hey! Aren’t you the new Bruins trade?” Diesel nodded. “You’re bigger in person. I’ll fire up the grill. You look like a double-stack young man.”
His laugh boomed in the empty diner and Kenzie felt her heart flip over in her chest. He glanced down and caught her staring. “Thank you, ma’am.”
“Sure thing, sugar.”
He snagged Kenzie’s hand and suddenly the feel of his huge, warm hands all over her flooded into her brain. Her mind was going crazy. She was not equipped to deal with Diesel LeBlanc in the flesh.
MacKenzie Rhodes…in the flesh. They slid into opposite sides of a booth and she shrugged off the jacket that sported his old team’s name. He glanced at the familiar logo and wondered at the way things happened sometimes. A year ago, he’d have never considered going to another team.
Last month, it suddenly seemed right.
And here he sat, across from a woman that had haunted his dreams more nights than he cared to admit. He stared at her openly, taking in her black bar tank top and snug jeans. Her dark hair was pulled back on top, held in small clips, the rest fell loose down her back, a little longer than he remembered.
There was something about her…something that made her even lovelier than she’d been years ago.
He rested one arm along the back of the booth and watched her eyes take him in for just a moment. He laid his hand flat on the table and she followed the movement. It was when he rubbed his thumb against his fingers, and her lips parted, that he realized she was pretending a disinterest she didn’t feel.
“You’re lovelier than ever, Kenzie. You look exhausted though.”
“I told you I was. I keep a lot of plates spinning.”
She started to talk and asked him how he was. He answered like a man accustomed to talking about himself. The more he answered, the more she asked. He tried to ask questions about her life, and she told him a little, but he felt like she was not saying more than she was saying. She quickly turned the conversation back to him.
They ordered their food and the owner asked him to sign an autograph and he did. The woman thanked him and left them alone. Kenzie was focused on the table.
“Where do you live, Kenzie?”
Her eyes jumped to his. “Here in Cambridge,” she said quietly.
“Funny how I figured that. I meant where?”
“Why, Diesel?”
There was no way he was imagining her distress. “I want to see your house…you’ve seen mine before.” He watched her every expression intently.
“No. Thad has classes all day during the week and…he’s sleeping.” She stumbled over the last part and he fixed on it. Kenzie glanced through the window to her truck. Suddenly, she seemed desperate to escape him.
He stared at her in silence for a long time. “There it was again. That strange hesitation, like you’re censoring yourself. What aren’t you telling me, MacKenzie?”
She leaned forward. “Diesel, this situation makes me nervous. I haven’t seen you in four years. I’ve grown up and changed a lot. I’m not interested in playing with you, or in you playing with me for that matter. I’m not the same person I was.”
“I’ll make you a deal, MacKenzie. Tonight we’ll catch up on unimportant topics and keep things light.” He leaned forward.
“For tonight, I’ll be satisfied to talk to you and watch you…I’m hoping to make you smile because you look like you need to, like you don’t have enough chances to smile. Looks like we’re going to be living near one another again, Kenzie. Like old times. And I’m going to figure out this little thing…whatever it is you’re keeping from me.”
She committed to nothing but their food came and she watched him dig into his pancakes. She picked at her club sandwich. “How is your jaw?”
Diesel’s smile was smug as he swallowed and took a sip of his coffee. “You really have been paying attention, haven’t you?” That pleased him far more than it should have. “It’s good. Thankfully, it was the last game of the season, so I didn’t have to go on the injured list. I’m doing pretty good overall right now.” He pointed to his teeth. “These three are implants.”
“I know, I saw the post-game footage. That had to hurt.”
“Kenzie, tell me you’ll see me again so I don’t have to stalk you.”
“Diesel, that’s a really horrible idea. You’re doing so well. You don’t need a Rhodes girl mucking your shit up. You should let things lie. Leave the past in the past.”
He sat back with a grin. “Stalking it is then.” She laughed because she couldn’t help herself. “Do you know Damien and Cristiana have been dating on the sly for the past several months? Trying not to let any of their siblings know?” Diesel wiggled his brows and made her crack up again.
Kenzie pushed her plate to the side and crossed her arms on the table. “Do you know Douglas and Katya have been having hot monkey sex off and on for over a year and not even Cristiana knows? He makes business trips out to see her in LA.”
He came to full attention. “What?” He shook his head and she nodded. “Digger would have told me. No way.”
“Think so? I thought Kat would have told me, too…I happened to catch her talking to him on the phone the last time she visited. I had to wrestle the damn thing from her…being nosey is my prerogative since I’m the oldest. Can’t mistake the caller ID of Digger Baby. She confessed after I threatened to tell her twin she was keeping secrets.”
Diesel was floored but smiling. “Dean has been chasing Jackie in Chicago for months. She won’t give him the time of day. Says she has more important things to do than entertain a flighty LeBlanc boy. Drives him nuts.”
“Just hard to get. She’s crazy about him…doesn’t want him thinking she’s easy,” Kenzie assured him.
Pushing his empty plate aside, he folded his massive arms on the table to mimic her position. “Three out of four Rhodes girls with three out of the four oldest LeBlanc boys. Interesting odds. So
MacKenzie…why are you playing hard to get?”
“How do you know I’m just not interested, Diesel? You’ve gotten used to supermodels falling at your feet, I think. We mere mortals do things a little differently.”
He flinched before he could stop the reaction to her knowing about his highly-publicized flings. He recovered quickly when he realized she was using it to deflect him.
Was she really trying to convince him she wasn’t physically attracted to him? Her nipples told a far different story.
Diesel leaned further across the table and whispered, “I dare you to test that theory, Kenzie.”
She took a deep breath and looked down at the table top. “You don’t want to do this, Diesel. I mean it. Things are good for you. Leave them alone. My personal notch is already in your bedpost; no need to go there again. I’m sure there are plenty of women just praying you’ll call them.”
She stood up and grabbed her stuff. Kissing his hair, he felt her inhale deeply. As she stood up, she added, “It was good to see you, Diesel. I’m so proud of you.”
Then she was out the door like she was fleeing the scene of a crime.
Diesel threw money on the table and hauled ass to his truck. He could see her at the end of the block and peeled out to catch her.
For several miles he stayed far enough away to avoid her catching sight of him. As they slowly maneuvered the streets of Cambridge, he grinned to himself. He hadn’t been kidding about the stalking.
She was hiding something, and since she wouldn’t come clean, he was going to figure it out.
When she pulled into an apartment complex, he passed it then circled around and waited to see which apartment she was going into.
A window lit up and he smiled. Got ya, baby.
He watched as she moved around, turning lights on and off. A soft blue light in another window drew his attention. It seemed to be moving, like a display or something.
What the fuck?
Then he noticed the action figures and plastic animals lined up inside the two windows of that room. There was a child sleeping in that apartment. There was a small child in Kenzie’s apartment.
Breaking the Ice Page 4
