“Can I turn on the light?” Cynthia rose toward it, bringing me back to the present moment. “I just want to watch you both. I want to see.”
I looked into Jay’s eyes. Hope swam within those green pupils and outlining them was love. His love existed there for me to see. He didn’t shut it away like he’d done before. This time, his love was out on display. And nowhere did I see deception or the desire to break my heart.
“Don’t hurt me,” I muttered. “That’s what I’m scared about. That I’ll give you the little bit that you don’t have of me, and you’ll take it, use me, and throw everything away. Don’t hurt me.”
Anger creased his face. Rage flared in his eyes. “Never. I would kill myself first. If I couldn’t, Mrs. Elaine would shoot me, or Pipe would torture me. Never. I love you, Evie. I love you.”
I turned my head. “Then turn on the light, Cynthia, but let’s not all get our hopes up. I’m just trying whatever this is for a few days. No more.”
Instead of the Kermit the Frog lamp, she reached over to the one layered in ivory flowers that snaked up the length and flared out into tiny hearts. A white glow bathed us all. Cynthia lay on her pillow. Excitement smoothed her face, making her blue eyes sparkle and her skin flush as if she’d been having sex for the past hour.
Jay got up and pulled off his boxer briefs like a mad man. They ripped a little on the sides and tangled a little at his ankles. By the time he returned with that erection pointing my way, I giggled from the craziness of the whole situation.
“I’m funny to you?” He nipped at my chin.
“We’re all mad here.”
“Oh yes. I’m mad. You’re mad.” Spreading my slick folds apart, he pierced me with him. I formed around him as he plunged into me. His cock stuffed me.
Oh yes!
I arched my back.
Cynthia moved in closer and kissed my cheek. Unprepared, I let her with no argument. How weird that it was such a tender gesture, holding no sensuality in it. She landed another peck on my forehead and returned to her spot. It felt like a thank you, but I wasn’t sure. Jay’s cock commanded all of my attention.
The bedpost banged into the wall. Grunting, Jay pounded into me with no mercy or restraint. I screamed in glee. “Yes! Don’t stop.”
His cock felt so good, like it was created for me. My arousal wet his pelvic bone as it sent delicious pressure to my clit. I grabbed the sheets, moaning so loud and knowing that the whole floor must’ve heard me.
Cynthia seized my hand, the one right next to her. Her soft fingers encased mine. She kissed each fingertip. I used her hold as momentum to propel my lower body into him, meeting his strokes each time. He may have snared my heart so long ago, but he’d have to earn my body and give me his own.
He pulled out with an enraged expression, clutching his cock in his hand.
“Come back,” I cried.
“You’ve got me so close to coming.” He squeezed the tip and closed his eyes. “Damn it, Evie. I’ll never survive you if you end this with us. Don’t walk away. Please, don’t.”
“I’ll…I’ll try.”
“No,” he said through clenched teeth. “Promise me.”
“Jay,” I whispered.
“Promise!”
I jumped a little. “I-I promise.”
“For eternity.” He climbed back on top of me and slowly slipped inside. His cock stretched me even wider than before.
“Eternity.” My flesh tingled.
He captured my lips and drove his cock in and out of me at a luscious rhythm that ripped my body apart and claimed me as his. No one else had this effect on me. An orgasm crashed into me, gaining no time to build, or rise, or spark. My whole body spasmed under him.
“Hell yes,” Jay groaned and sped up. “Right there, Evie. Shit, I’m coming.”
I lay there in exhaustion as he shifted his manic strokes into relentless thrusts that left me limp and tingling all over.
God. I hope I don’t regret this.
Epilogue
Evie
“So, you’re going to the Heisman ceremony with Jason and his girlfriend? Why would you be tagging along?” Mom asked.
Even though she was miles away on the West Coast, I could see her face as she pondered this. I don’t know what made a mother, but one of the ingredients that went into the recipe of a good mom was suspicion. Mom remained suspicious of any bullshit I threw her way. She smelled it before I said the words, spied it before it appeared in front of her eyes.
“Yes, Mom. I’m just going for support. He’s now one of three candidates. We don’t know if he’s even gotten the trophy yet—”
“Why, of course my baby won. Who else would they give the Heisman to?”
I slung open my suitcase and searched for the heels I’d set aside for the event. Jay had taken Cynthia and me shopping for the whole trip. “I’m just being logical, Mom. Maybe one of the other two candidates will win.”
“That’s ridiculous, Evelyn. Jason has worked hard.”
“The other guys have worked hard too.”
“Yes, but God watches over Jason, honey. That trophy is his. Don’t go up there bringing negative thoughts around him.”
Lord have mercy! I’m just thinking reasonable here.
“Fine.” I folded a few more clothes, checking the clock every few seconds. Pipe and his boyfriend, Shawn, who I would finally be meeting for the first time, were taking all of us out to eat. Cynthia got to choose the restaurant since she’d won the race two weeks ago. Knowing Pipe, it would be an all-nighter. I figured I should pack now since our plane left early tomorrow morning.
“And so you’re going with Jason and his girlfriend for support?”
“Yep.”
And because I’m his girlfriend too.
Jay couldn’t wait to tell Mom we were together, not even considering the fact that Mom would wonder about Cynthia. In all fairness, Cynthia raised the idea that she could just be a secret to my mom and others. I wasn’t ready to start all of the deception yet. I didn’t appreciate having to lie at all.
But I will, eventually, if our relationship continues to work out as easily as it is now.
No one would accept our situation, besides Pipe. Everyone would point, laugh, be disgusted, call us names, condemn us to hell, ridicule, and destroy our lives anyway they could.
Right now, Jay’s face played on television screens everywhere. He’d been named The All-American Sweetheart. The sad story of his parents’ deaths had broken the country’s hearts. Strangers all over rooted for him to win. Even cooler, he actually deserved it. He’d played his heart out every game. Agents called him every day. Companies offered him opportunities to sell their brands.
And he wants to give all that away by telling the world that he’s in love with two women. My lovely little dick head.
I’d told him not to do it over and over last night. He doesn’t like pretending I’m not his. He hated the way men looked at me when Cynthia, him, and I went out these past weeks and guys approached me as if I was single. Jay had come close to wringing a few necks.
Just to claim me in front of the world, he’d accept media shame and ridicule. Never. I wouldn’t let him do it.
“Are you all spending the night up in New York?” Mom asked.
“Yes.”
“In separate rooms?”
“Yep.” I tensed. “What type of question is that, Mom? Of course, we’ll be in two rooms.”
“When you say yep, you’re hiding something.”
I froze in my spot with my panties hanging from my fingers. “Huh? I’m not hiding something.”
“And then comes the ‘huh.’ Now I know something is up.”
“I don’t even understand what you’re talking about? Nothing is going on. Why would you think something is going on? I’ll be in my own room and Jay and his girlfriend will be in their room. The question you’re asking is so weird.”
“Well, you didn’t tell me until the day before you were leaving that
you were going. Then you say his girlfriend is coming which doesn’t seem right. I’ve seen see you two together. I know how that boy feels about you. Jason has no business taking you anywhere with him when he has a girlfriend.”
I covered my face. “Nothing is going on with Jay and me.”
“He’s been avoiding my calls for the past two weeks. He never avoids my calls unless he’s doing something that he knows I wouldn’t approve of.”
Or unless I told him to avoid your calls.
Jay couldn’t lie to my mom if he was getting paid a million dollars. I tapped my foot on the carpet. “I have to go, Mom.”
“Sure, you do. Just be a good girl and you tell Jay to be good too. Don’t you and him go hurting other people in the process as you both try to figure out what’s going on.”
I swallowed. “Where…what? Okay. No one is going to hurt anyone.”
“Be careful, Evelyn.”
“I don’t need to be careful because I’m not doing anything wrong.”
“Good. Just be careful.”
I sighed. “Okay, Mom.”
“Good girl. I love you, sweetheart.”
I smiled. “I love you too.”
We hung up.
I would have to tell Mom about us eventually. What I would tell her was the real question. How many miles away from her would keep me safe from her scrutiny was the most significant question. I’d seen her throw her shoe pretty far when she aimed at my behind. I wasn’t sure distance could save me.
I fingered the ring on my finger. Diamonds formed into an azalea flower that adorned a platinum band. Jay bought one that looked like mine for Cynthia, except hers flowed in the opposite direction. He’d taken us out to the beach late at night with a basket full of food and candles.
His shaking hands took out both of the boxes and handed it to us. “I looked up the different meanings for flowers. I discovered the azalea has three meanings. One is that it represents the beauty of womanhood. Two, it’s what many people give to their lovers as a gesture to take care of themselves, and finally, the flower symbolizes fragile love.”
He opened them. Both rings glimmered in the moonlight. “I wanted to give you two these rings because I’m not sure if you both get that I understand how fragile our relationship is. We’ve had two outstanding weeks. Am I wrong?”
“No,” I admitted, although I was still taking each day one at a time.
“These are the best days of my life.” Cynthia gazed into my eyes. “Thank you so much for doing this, Evie. For giving this a try when you didn’t have to.”
“She’s right. Thanks, Evie.” He took the ring out and slipped it on my finger. “I fucking love you with all of my heart. Do you believe me?”
I swallowed down my rising fear. “Yes.”
“I love you both. Anytime either one of you feels bad or hurt, just tell me and I’ll do my best to fix it.”
“Okay,” I said. Cynthia nodded.
But how long would this be okay? I don’t think rings will save us in the future.
The rest of the night, we laid on the blanket and gazed at the stars above us. The sky had shined bright. A gentle wind brushed across our skin. Our hands tangled together. Cynthia and I both lay on Jay’s chest, listening to his heartbeat as it thumped in our ears. And I pushed my worries away, letting the moment take me and deciding to commit to them, one more minute, one more hour, one more day until I couldn’t commit anymore, until I had to walk away.
I’ll have to walk away eventually.
Because how long would this continue when, if the world knew, they would mock us and tear us apart?
“For eternity?” Jay kissed my forehead.
I’ll try.
Committed To You
Book II
Intro
Sometimes two halves still don't make you whole. And sometimes, what you see isn't the whole story.
* * *
Evie entered an unlikely threesome, without being prepared for the reality of the situation, or the feelings it would unearth. But away from prying eyes and behind closed doors, love fills the space, and Evie allows herself to feel.
Out in the real world, eyes watch and judge. And when the media catches wind of their relationship, all Evie wants to do is run. And Jay? He's not having it. Evie's trapped, lured back by Jay's intoxicating love and her growing compassion for Cynthia, whose morbid confession of a twisted past makes it impossible for Evie to leave.
Just when it seems all anyone could talk about was their complicated relationship, a death rocks their worlds. Evie, Jay and Cynthia head to Florida, united and ready to face whatever comes their way. While there, they find Pipe, getting into a little trouble of his own, and could really use his friends.
With chaos around them, all four find themselves in situations where they're left trying to discover their own identities and explore just how far their commitment to each other goes.
Chapter One
Cynthia
Asexual: The lack of sexual attraction to anyone or low to absent interest in sexual activity.
The words stared at me from my laptop screen as I leaned back in my chair. In front of me, Evie and Jay lounged on the king-sized bed in our hotel room. A pile of books, notes, and highlighters rested before them as they studied for the upcoming finals. Evie’s jazz played low in the background. She’d read in some magazine article that fruit fragrance improved a person’s concentration, so weird lemon candles were burning all around the room. Their sweet aroma flooded the space.
Twirling my Miss Piggy pencil in my hand, I read the words again.
Low to absent interest in sexual activity? That’s not exactly me, but close in most cases. Lack of sexual attraction? I don’t really lack. Or do I? Fuck muffins. Nothing really defines me.
I sighed and closed the website. Although those words disappeared from my screen, they remained singed into my brain, burning every cell for every second that passed. The stink of its smoke crowded my nostrils. Asexual? I'd read that alien definition over and over for the last two weeks. No one knew I’d been researching myself. No one. Not even Jay or Evie. They thought I was studying too.
Is that what I am?
It sounded foreign on my lips. The very word made me feel grotesque and wrong. Worms were asexual. Things non-human were asexual. Not normal girls from regular middle-class families who lived in average neighborhoods in small towns. Asexual was what strange kids from hip, free-thinking parents proclaimed they were, as they meditated on candle-lit roofs in fast-paced cities.
“Stop it, Jay!” On the bed, Evie giggled as Jay attacked her with kisses to her neck.
She’d put her thick, black hair in corkscrew curls. Each time Jay playfully grabbed one, they bounced around her shoulders. Like me, she wore our school’s football team shirt and jeans to support Jay this weekend and keep him from being so nervous. Green and yellow lines slashed across the white shirt. A ferocious wild cat snarled in the center of her chest.
But that was where the similarities ended between Evie and me. Where my skin was pale, hers was milk chocolate. I kept my blond hair in simple styles, either down and hanging over my shoulders or up in a pony-tail. Evie did things with those thick strands that made me gape at her in envy when she wasn’t looking—pretty twists and braids, zigzag corn rows and playful bobs.
The style I loved most of all was when she slicked all of her hair back and placed a fresh rose on the side. It was a welcoming elegance, one that didn’t cause envy in other women. Instead, they were drawn to her, not really sure of how or why. People claimed I possessed a classic girl next door beauty. When they glanced Evie’s way, they gawked and whispered words like exotic and wild sex.
Then there was Jay, who always remained between us. Muscle formed his body. Hard, chiseled muscle. When he walked into a room, most turned and stared, even a few heterosexual men who probably appreciated his ability to get such a bulky athletic frame. He’d recently shaved off his chestnut curls because of some stupid be
t he and his football team had. They made a wager that he couldn’t break the college football record by completing nine touchdown passes. Last game, he did eight. Evie and I helped him shave and took him in the shower for a nice soap-down to soothe his ego. Although I only watched, Evie and Jay did things in that shower I’m sure broke several laws in good Christian states.
Luckily, we don’t live in a good Christian state. What an unusual group we are.
“Jay, seriously? Leave me alone.” Evie punched him in the stomach as he tried to pinch her side. Instead of discouraging him, her counterattack only incited more play. He slung his book away and captured her. She shrieked. I smiled as they wrestled on the bed. They rocked from side to side. The mattresses squeaked. Their legs tangled, and her physics book hit the floor.
“Stop! I’m trying to study.”
“Take a break.” He held her down, sucked on the curve of her neck, and whispered something in her ear that I couldn’t hear, but triggered more giggles from her. Jealousy pinched my heart. They’d been doing that a lot more lately, whispering and laughing just between themselves.
Don’t think like that. It’s no big deal. They’ve known each other for a long time. Of course, they have private jokes.
“No. I can’t take a break.” She climbed out of his arms, grabbed the books off the floor, jumped right back on the bed, and lay on her stomach. “We have two hours before I have to get ready for the Heisman ceremony. Then I’m sure you’ll want to celebrate afterward. I’ll never have enough time this weekend to finish studying.”
He slid next to her and ran his fingers through those black curls. “I told you not to say that I’m going to win.”
“I didn’t.”
“You did.”
“Oh, shut up.” She flipped him her middle finger. “Out of all the college football players in the US, you made it to the final round of three nominees. Do you know how insane that is? It doesn’t matter if you win. You’re officially one of the three best players in college football; we’re celebrating regardless.”
The COMPLETE Coventon Campus Series: Books I, II, & III Page 11
