Guilt trickled through him. He wanted to reach out and touch her, but he was scared she’d slap him away.
“I’m an ass,” he said gruffly. “A selfish ass. And I’ve never lied to you about anything else. Every second we spent together, I was completely and totally honest with you. I never lied about the way I feel for you. Ever.” His throat closed up, making it hard to go on. “But I understand if you want to end it. I guess I deserve that.”
Lynn released a shaky sigh. “I’m not ending it.”
Hope erupted inside him. “You’re not?”
“No. But I’m not too happy with you at the moment, either.” She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, frazzled. “I need some time to think.”
The panic promptly returned. “To think about whether you still want to be with me?” he said roughly.
“To think about whether or not I trust you.”
The quiet words were like a bullet straight to the heart. He almost keeled over from the pain, but at the same time, he couldn’t fault her. He’d fucked up, plain and simple. He’d had plenty of opportunities to tell her the truth. Two months’ worth of opportunities. But he’d been so happy to be with her, so addicted to the way she made him feel, he’d put it off, not wanting to spoil things.
“I understand.” He swallowed again. “Take all the time you need. But…just know…I…” God, it fucking hurt to talk. The lump in his throat was too big. “I’m sorry, and if you give me the chance, I’ll prove to you that you can trust me.”
Lynn slowly reached for the strap of her purse. “I need to go back to work. I shouldn’t have even left, but I had to talk to you. I had to make sure Phil wasn’t just trying to cause trouble.”
Parker’s fists curled at the mention of Shotelle. He wanted to throttle the bastard for telling Lynn. She should have heard the truth from him, not her slimy ex-boyfriend. But Parker’s anger didn’t last, because as much as he loathed Shotelle, he knew damn well that he, and nobody else, was to blame for this situation.
“I know we had plans tonight, but under the circumstances, I’m canceling.” Lynn’s face was sad as she clutched her purse.
“I understand.” He walked her to the door, then paused, gazing earnestly into her eyes. “I’m serious—take all the time you need. Days, weeks, months—I’ll wait as long as it takes, Lynn.”
Her breath hitched slightly as she studied his face. “You really mean that.”
“Of course I do.” Deciding to risk it, Parker quickly dipped his head and brushed his lips over hers in the softest of kisses. He pulled back before she could push him away. “I’ll be right here. Waiting for you to forgive me.”
Lynn nodded. Took a hesitant step, halted for a beat to meet his eyes again. Then she walked out of the office.
Taking his heart right along with her.
Chapter Fourteen
The trip back to the office felt icy cold, in spite of the sunshine that insisted on painting everything with cheery yellow beams.
Inside was where everything had changed.
She pulled into her parking stall and sat there for a moment. Hurting, and not sure what to do about it.
She really didn’t care the guys had been doing the job on her. Their line of work helped other people a lot, she got that. And it wasn’t like she tried to keep her list of likes and dislikes a secret from the world. But to not tell her?
Argh. She didn’t want to think about it, not for a while.
But of course her BFF had other ideas. Suz must have had radar, because the instant Lynn plopped her butt down in her chair, her phone rang.
“Go away, I’m busy.”
“Of course you’re busy. You’re busy talking to your best friend about the secret meeting. So? What gives?”
“Go away,” Lynn repeated. She stared at her computer screen. “I am not dishing all the details here and now, for so many reasons. But suffice it to say I’m not happy, and I will tell you the rest when you take me out tonight for Chinese.”
“Tonight?” Suz paused a beat. “What happened to your regularly scheduled Friday night sex-fest with Parker?”
“Leave it alone.”
“Just getting my facts straight, ma’am. You want to indulge in Chinese gluttony with me and not your main squeeze? Now I know something big and nasty went down. But how did this start with a trip to Phil’s office and end with you and Parker on the rocks—?” Suz rumbled like an upset mama lion. “I need to kill him, don’t I?”
“Parker, or Phil?”
“You pick. Or I can give you a two-for-one special, since you’re my bestie and all.”
Lynn leaned back so far in her chair she was in danger of crashing to the floor. “It’s not that bad,” she insisted. “But it’s bad enough I’m ordering spring rolls and wonton wrappers, and you are picking up the tab and driving me.”
Suz swore softly. “Oh my God, you’re planning on drinking yourself senseless. I’ll bring my shotgun and put a shovel in my trunk. We can get rid of the body tonight without anyone being the wiser.”
“Parker or Phil?” Lynn tossed back at her.
“Alphabetical order suggests…”
It was damn near impossible to stay upset with a best friend like Suz around. “Pick me up at seven.”
“Are you sure you’ll be okay ’til then?”
“Fine and dandy. Now get back to work before both of us end up in trouble for getting nothing accomplished.”
The next umpteen hours passed quicker than Lynn had expected, rushing to meet her deadlines before wearily hauling herself to the elevator. She’d spent so much time putting out one final fire that most of her coworkers had already gone home for the day.
The frantic pace had stopped her from brooding too much about Parker. She rested her head on the car seat for a moment as she breathed out long and hard.
She missed him already, stupid, needy woman that she was.
Although, that wasn’t right either. She wasn’t stupid to want the man in her life to be trustworthy in the big things and little things. Everything tied together, and if Parker couldn’t understand that, as heartbreaking as it was to deal with right now, they would have been headed into a pile of trouble down the road.
The look of anguish in his eyes returned to mind, and her gut twisted. He knew how disappointed she was. He was willing to wait?
Now it was only a matter of how long.
Enough dilly-dallying. She turned the key in the car ignition, and nothing happened. Lynn tried again, and again, finally undoing her seatbelt and popping up the hood. Not because she knew what to look for, but because that’s what people did when their car wouldn’t start.
“Jeez. This is stupid.”
She pulled out her cell phone to call Parker, pausing as a sharp pain stabbed her heart again.
Nope. Not him. Maybe Suz—
“Lynn? What’s wrong?” Phil appeared from the shadows, briefcase in hand, dress coat thrown over his arm.
“I have no idea.” She peered at the engine in hopes little gremlins would jump up and down and point to something that was obviously unplugged. No such luck. “It won’t start, and it worked just before lunch.”
“Did you leave a door open or a light on? It could be your battery.”
She didn’t think she had, but it was possible. “Do you have jumper cables?”
He shook his head. “Sorry, I’m afraid car mechanics are another thing I’m not very good at.” He tossed her a self-deprecating smile. “But I can drive you home. Would that help?”
Suz was probably at home already getting changed. Lynn examined her would-be rescuer. Phil clutched his briefcase handle with both hands, an earnest light in his eyes. There seemed no good reason to turn him down.
She accepted with a smile, opening her door and grabbing her purse. “Thanks for the lift.”
“No problem. I’m glad I was still here.”
Lynn was grateful he didn’t offer his arm or anything that would have made the situation awkwar
d. Instead they walked in companionable silence toward his parking stall.
She didn’t recognize the vehicle. “What happened to your Porsche?”
Phil opened the passenger door before offering a hand into the oversized beast. “Decided it was time for something a little more reliable.”
While Phil walked the long way around, she glanced over her shoulder into the back of the suburban minivan. It made no sense, but she supposed if the guy wanted to drive a van instead of a sports car, that was his decision.
It was like falling back into a familiar pattern. They didn’t say a word as Phil concentrated on driving, easing slowly from the underground parking and merging into rush-hour traffic.
Lynn stared out the window without seeing anything. She didn’t want to be moping about this forever. Putting it in perspective, while honesty was important to her, she understood why Parker might have hesitated to share. It wasn’t as if he’d cheated on her or turned out to have a secret attic family or a serial killer dungeon in his basement. It wasn’t life or death, and even now after a few hours to think it over, her temperature gauge was cooling.
After a couple of drinks and a solid heart-to-heart with Suz at Wu’s Kitchen, she’d consider giving Parker a phone call. Or sending a text. She pulled out her phone and checked it without thinking, but there were no new messages.
He had taken her suggestion to stay away seriously. Probably the first time the demanding man had ever caved and followed an order from a woman.
She wasn’t sure if she should be pleased or upset.
To avoid the temptation to contact him immediately, she slipped the phone into her coat pocket, then clasped her hands in her lap and tilted her head back, closing her eyes. Just for a moment, because it had been a hell of a day.
The low rumble of the tires on pavement fell into a rhythm.
Smooth.
Steady.
Lynn jerked upright, catching herself nodding off to sleep. “Sorry about that.”
Instrumental music played softly in the background, not encouraging her to wake up very quickly. “No problem,” Phil said quietly.
She blinked hard, but nothing outside the window looked familiar. Whoa, maybe she had been asleep for a minute or two. “Why are we on the freeway?”
Phil cleared his throat. “I have a favor to ask.”
Her gut response was hell no, but before she could say anything, he spoke in that calm, reasonable tone of voice he used oh so often in board meetings.
“I’m up for a promotion.”
Nice for him, didn’t answer her question about where the hell they were. “What does that have to do with—” She spotted a highway sign, and swore. “Why are we heading toward Monterey?”
He continued as if she’d never interrupted him. “Jeffrey Bigelow is the executive director of Connect International. They’re the ones who own Bay City Press and a dozen other newspapers up and down the West Coast. If I get in on this position, I’ll be able to green-light the digital program you’ve written. Which, of course, means you will receive a raise, and quite possibly be put in charge of the entire division.”
As much as Lynn loved her job and was keen about her program, she was still trying to find the real answer she needed right now. “Why are we going to Monterey?”
Phil flashed her his most enchanting smile. “We’ve been invited to spend the weekend with Mr. Bigelow while he works out his final considerations.”
“I never got any invitation, and I never accepted an offer to go to Monterey on a moment’s notice.”
“It’s the career move of a lifetime,” Phil pointed out. “You’ve got to see that. No, you didn’t get the invitation, I did. So I took the initiative to make a decision that would be good for both of us in the long run. All we have to do is spend the weekend with the Bigelows, let them see what a fine, upstanding couple we are—”
“But we’re not a couple,” she interrupted. The longer he spoke, the more rapidly her heart beat.
“One weekend. Just for one weekend,” he begged. “I promise there will be no funny business, but Mr. Bigelow is known for being the most dedicated family man ever. There is no way he would approve this promotion unless he knew I was happily married, or on the way to being settled down with a fine woman.”
It was the craziest thing she’d ever heard. Lynn slipped her hand toward her pocket in the hopes of grabbing her phone on the sly. “You want me to pretend to be with you so you can get a job promotion, so you can put my program into place, and all of this based on a lie? Do you think everyone around us is stupid?”
So much for all his bullshit talk about honesty this morning.
“Of course I don’t think people are stupid. But Bigelow is retiring in six months, so as long as he puts me into position and nothing untoward happens in the next short while, I’m good. I mean, we’re good.”
This was unbelievable. “Phil, come on. This is a disaster waiting to happen. Everyone at work knows we broke up and that I’ve been seeing someone else.”
“Someone who lied to you.”
And everything became crystal clear.
Lynn held onto her temper by the thinnest of threads. “So you expect me to lie not only for this weekend, but potentially for the next six months.”
“The weekend is not a problem. I grabbed some things for you. They’re in a bag in the back. And after this weekend—”
“You grabbed some things for me… From my apartment? Did you go into my apartment?” The idea made her nauseous. “This is beyond unbelievable. Turn the van around right now and take me back. Drop me off anywhere, and I’ll get a taxi home. You do it now and this will end right here. I swear I will never mention it again.”
She slipped her hand into her pocket and felt around for a phone that wasn’t there.
Phil had one eye on the traffic in front of them, the other on the phone she was looking for. He held it in the air away from her. “I will give it back after the weekend.”
“Stop this stupidity. No. I will make my decision very clear now. I will not pretend to be your little woman.”
He sighed. “I thought you were smarter than this. I’m not asking for much.”
“You kidnapped me, you broke into my apartment and stole my clothes. You’ve taken my phone.” Lynn leaned forward in her seat and gave him the stare of doom. “Do not think for even one second that I will be reasonable about this. You take me to the Bigelows, and I will turn around and come home on my own power. You should have grabbed one of your other chickies from the office. I’m sure one of them would have been happy pretending to be the future Mrs. Shotelle without you having to watch your back.”
“None of them are you. Enough with your complaining. I truly didn’t want it to come to this, but it seems I have no choice. You are going to do this for me, and I’ll tell you why. If you don’t, I’ll make terrible things happen to your friend.”
Suz? He was threatening her best friend? As if.
“I hope you have a good life-insurance policy if you think you can get anywhere near her and survive. Not to mention her four brothers and mom and dad, who are all on the police force.”
They were still moving down the highway at a steady clip, Phil traveling in the high-speed carpool lane as the miles flashed by.
“Susanna? Oh hell no, I would not go within twenty feet of that woman without her first being restrained. I was talking about your boyfriend, Parker Wilson, and the rest of that deranged crew at their fairy-boy dating service.”
Now his threat made even less sense. “You’re scared to go near a woman, but you plan on taking on three ex-Rangers? You did tell me once you’ve already prepaid your funeral expenses, correct?”
“I’m not stupid, and I know my strengths and weaknesses. You will help me out this weekend, or I will contact certain business associates I have who will be more than happy to publish a full disclosure tell-all about how the owners of DreamMakers are using their company to stalk women, and how they abuse clie
nt confidentiality.”
What? “I had already called off our relationship before—”
“I had a signed contract with the company that they violated,” Phil snapped. “I doubt DreamMakers can afford the negative publicity that will sweep in when people begin to doubt their discretion. And it doesn’t matter in the end if Parker can prove he did nothing wrong. Enough people will believe the rumors, and the lingering suspicions will be enough to destroy them.”
Lynn’s chest went tight. All she could picture was the look of pride Parker wore every time he talked about how much he enjoyed his job and how important DreamMakers had become in his life. Not to mention Dean, Jack, and Didi all relied on the company for their jobs as well.
Still, Phil had to be bluffing. He was not the type to want to be dragged into the media himself. “I don’t believe you’d do that.”
“You would regret your decision. Very quickly.” He waved her phone in the air. “I have an email written with all the details ready to send at the push of a button. Plus, I already sent a text message to your best friend and told her you were going on a retreat this weekend. Needed a little space to find yourself. Don’t try to contact me, I’ll see you on Monday, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.”
Lynn pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration. “You are not seriously blackmailing me just so you can get a job.”
“I’m forty-seven years old, and if I don’t get this position I’m going to be hung out to dry.” Phil shouted loud enough she jerked away in fear at the anger in his voice.
Also? “Forty-seven? You told me—”
“Lies, Lynn. I told you lies.” He stared straight ahead, both hands clenched around the steering wheel as he fumed. All signs of the calm and rather boring man she had known shifted into a tower of fury and unexpected danger. “The only reason I went out with you in the first place was because you’re the type of woman Mr. Bigelow would be impressed with, and now you. Will. Do. This.”
All Fired Up (DreamMakers) Page 17
