As he started to turn away, I reached for his hand.
He glanced down at his hand in mine then looked at me. “You just proved it.”
“What’d I prove?”
“You’re not the damaged girl.” He gave my hand a squeeze then let it go. “Can we rehearse now?”
“What do you want me to sing?”
“What do you want to sing?” He asked standing by the digital recorder.
“Young Nelson.”
“I’m not familiar with it.”
“It’s a Lord Randall version from northern Connecticut.”
“Okay. Go. Do it.” Truly turned on the digital recorder.
I had played it a thousand times. I knew this song backwards and forwards. There was no way I was going to forget the lyrics or the chords.
Where have you been, young Nelson, my son
Where have you been my own pretty one?
I’ve been to Missy’s, mother, make my bed soon
For I’m poisoned to the heart
And I’m bound to lie down.
What did you eat there, young Nelson, my son
What did you eat there my own pretty one?
Eel fried in butter, mother, make my bed soon
For I’m poisoned to the heart
And I’m bound to lie down.
What color was it, young Nelson, my son
What color was it my own pretty one?
Green, white and checkered, mother, make my bed soon
For I’m poisoned to the heart
And I’m bound to lie down
What to your sister, young Nelson, my son,
What to you sister, my own pretty one?
My horse and carriage, mother, make my bed soon
For I’m poisoned to the heart
And I’m bound to lie down.
What to your lover, my own pretty one.
A hangman’s noose, mother, make my bed soon
For I’m poisoned to the heart
And I’m bound to lie down.
Truly turned off the recorder when I stopped playing.
I felt embarrassed. Maybe it wasn’t a good song to choose. Maybe I should have picked something he knew. Maybe I should have played something happy, that would go over well with an audience.
“That’s the best version I ever heard of it.”
“Oh. I, um, bumped up the melody in that one section.”
“I could tell that.”
“I thought it wasn’t so monotone that way.”
He picked up his violin. “Let’s do it again. I have a couple ideas.”
I didn’t move.
“You need to put your fingers on the strings for the guitar to work.”
I was so grateful. This was a blessing I never expected. I wasn’t even sure I deserved it but I smiled. “That part’s always confused me.”
***
About an hour later, Sonny and Quinn arrived just as we were working on an arrangement for a song neither of us had ever sung before but Truly was certain it would be perfect. I trusted his judgment in all things musical but perfection had eluded us for an hour. His standards were higher than my abilities. He heard phrasing I didn’t, and felt rhythms in underlying currents that didn’t exist for me. Still I tried to follow his directions and there were no complaints.
It was one of the first times in recent memory that I had done anything that hadn’t garnered bountiful criticism. No matter what I did at the Kent house, chances were that I would be accused of not doing it properly. It was a sport for Toby more than a reflection on actual performance. I knew that, but the sting never went away.
We worked on the song for another twenty minutes.
“Do we need a keyboard for this?” Sonny asked.
Truly rested his violin on his knee. “I can do keyboard but then we don’t have the fiddle.”
“I can do the fiddle,” I said. “But then I can’t sing.”
“How we’d do it in the studio and how we do it live is going to be two different versions. Let’s strip it to the essentials.”
“No percussion?” Quinn asked.
“Let’s try it.”
Twenty minutes later, Quinn was back on drums.
“We’ll use the fiddle to replace the keyboard. Sonny will do most of the backup vocals.”
“Tru...” I started.
“I’ll still stand next to you.”
“It’s practically a duet. It’s an echo song.”
“I’ll be there.”
I didn’t see how it was possible. Until we did it and then it was obvious.
As Truly drew the bow across the strings for the final note, there was the sound of two hands clapping. Emily came up to us, tears in her eyes and clutched him to her.
“Mom. Give it a rest.”
She let him go then gave me a big hug.
“He was such a strange child,” she said. “Now I know where he was always going.”
“I know where I’m going,” Truly sang.
“And I know who’s going with me,” I sang the next line.
“I know who I love.”
“And my dear knows who I’ll marry,” I finished the verse. Then we sang together.
“I have stockings of silk
“And shoes of bright green leather
“Combs to buckle my hair
“And a ring for every finger.
“Feather beds are soft
“And painted rooms are bonny
“But I would give them all
“For my handsome, winsome Johnny.”
She shook her head. “Do you two have a song for every occasion?”
I nodded.
Chapter 11
Truly stopped the car at Maude’s house. “You’re okay getting home from here?”
“Yes. I don’t want Toby seeing you.”
“You can’t hide me forever.”
“Let me try.”
He laughed.
All the way back to the house, in the dark, I remembered his laughter. Joy spilling out.
I opened the door. Janie was standing in the kitchen smiling. I should have known something was really wrong.
“Look who’s home!”
She stepped aside.
It was Joe.
I felt my heart start to pound.
“Isn’t it super?” Toby asked, draped around her brother.
“Unbelievable!” I tried to smile.
“Hi, Neal,” he said. “You’re sure growing up.” His eyes ran up and down my body just as if it were his hands caressing me. Joe crossed the room and grabbed me hard, pulling me close and kissed me. He stunk of beer and ripe body odor. He needed a shower. Or a fire hose trained on him.
Joe pushed his bottle of beer at me. “Have a drink.”
“No thanks, tempting, but I have homework.”
“Yeah, she’s a real bookworm,” Toby mocked.
“No kidding,” Joe said, eyes glued to me.
I nodded. “It’s good to see you.”
Janie was beaming. “He’s staying. We’re going to be a family again.”
“Fantastic,” I replied. “Everyone’s going to be so happy.”
As I walked to the stairs, they turned back to what they were doing, drinking and eating chips. I got to my room, closed the door behind me and stood there not having an idea in my head.
Something had to be done before the fear submerged me.
I dug through the clothes in my drawer until I found the cell phone hidden there and pressed the speed dial.
“Neal?”
“He’s back.”
“Who?”
“Joe.”
“Get out. Now.”
“How?”
“Come up with an excuse to leave.”
“I can’t think.” I could barely breathe.
“How many bedrooms are there in the house?”
“Yeah. Shannon and I shared a room when he was here.”
“Be magnanimous. Say you’re going to stay at M
aude’s so he can have his own room. You don’t want him to be uncomfortable on the couch.”
“Then what?”
“One thing at a time.”
“So I’ll go stay at Maude’s.”
“Like hell, I’m turning around. I’ll pick you up at Maude’s.”
“Then what?”
“You’ll stay with us until we get it figured out. Don’t go downstairs until you’re sure you can convince them.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll see you in a couple minutes.”
I sat on the edge of my bed feeling dizzy, feeling cold and wondering what he was doing back. There was a large duffel bag in the back of my closet. I packed it carefully with everything I considered important, everything I wanted in case I never went back. That was a real possibility. If Joe was going to be here forever, I was never going to live under the same roof with him again.
It didn’t bother me leaving this room and this house. I had been little more than a boarder here. When I closed the door to my room, I heard them downstairs. Toby and Joe were on the way to being drunk but weren’t there yet. If I waited, Joe was a mean drunk and so was his sister. Right now, they were celebrating to be together again.
The window of opportunity was very small and this was going to be the performance of my life. If I could get through this, the Enchanted Garden Canoe Rental gig was going to be a cinch.
They were in the living room with the television blaring and for a moment, I thought about just leaving but didn’t want to risk it. If they caught me sneaking out, there would be hell to pay. I left the duffel bag by the door so I could grab it and go and they wouldn’t see how much I was taking with me.
I waited until they were laughing then went into the living room. “Janie. I have a good idea. Maude’s knees are bothering her, you know how much I’ve been down there helping out.”
Janie nodded. Toby and Joe weren’t paying attention, after all, it was me talking.
“If I stay there, it’ll help her and Joe can have my room. He shouldn’t sleep on that old sofa.”
He looked up at the mention of his name and tipped the bottle up to his lips.
“Temporary. We’ll figure it out,” I waved my hand like it was all a nothing little thing.
“Thanks, Neal,” Joe said.
“Just like old times,” Toby added, looking at him adoringly. “Our rooms next door to each other.”
“Okay. See ya, then,” I said, turned and made for the door. The duffel bag fought me on the way out it was so oversized and so full. Clothes, books, fiddle, laptop and a couple remaining items that belonged to my parents.
Hurrying down the road to Maude’s house, soon I could see the light. Then as I got closer, I could see all the outside lights were on, his truck was parked next to her car in the driveway. I felt almost safe as I dropped the bag and went to open the kitchen door.
Maude was there. “Are you all right? Truly’s told me what he knows.”
“I’m fine. They believed me about staying here and letting him take my room.”
“But you’re not staying here,” Maude said.
“Is that okay temporarily?” I asked.
“Yes, but don’t make trouble for these nice people doing you a favor.”
“I’ll call you as soon as I know something,” I said.
“What am I supposed to say if they come looking for you?”
I had wondered that, too, on the way down the road.
“Let my father figure that out,” Truly said as he left the house.
Maude gave me a hug. “I understand why you’re scared of him. He scares me, too.”
“Will you be okay?”
She smiled. “Sure. I’m tougher than he is.”
I doubted that. Aunt Maude wasn’t crazy.
We got into the truck, bouncing down the uneven dirt road and headed home. To his home.
“Is this okay with your parents?”
“It’s going to be fine. I tried to call my father but he was out. My mother is used to unexpected guests.”
“Maybe I should have stayed with Maude.”
“Too close.”
“But she’s alone.”
“He didn’t throw her under the tractor.”
Yeah. I had been expecting this moment for years. Since Joe had left, I knew he’d find his way back home eventually.
“I’m sorry you got involved in this. You’ve done so much already.” At least Joe had no idea where the Lamberts lived. He wasn’t going to show up at their door, stinking like a goat.
“Stop it.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“No. You don’t have to be grateful someone’s not kicking you like you’re a cowering dog.”
“Is that how I seem?”
“Yes, Neal. That’s how you seem because that’s how it’s been. That’s over.”
“Where am I going to go? I don’t want to go into foster care. Child protective services.”
“Geez. What an imagination. Can you take things one step at a time?”
“No!”
“I know you’re scared. It’ll get solved. I promise.”
“Truly?”
“What?”
“No. Do you promise truthfully?”
“Yes.” He turned the truck into his driveway. “For one thing, you’re my lead singer, I can’t afford to lose you.”
His father’s state police car was in the yard.
“Did you tell him about the tractor?”
“That’s your story to tell.”
I got out of the truck.
“Go in, I’ll bring your bag. It’s big enough. Did you pack everything?”
“I figured I was never going back.”
“You’re not.”
Steve opened the door for me. “Are you okay?”
I nodded.
“Think you can talk to me for a couple minutes?”
“Sure.”
“She’s fine,” Truly said as he came in with the duffel bag. “She fought with me all the way home.”
“That’s an exaggeration.”
“I’ll bet you haven’t had dinner. I’ll make everyone something and we can eat in twenty minutes. Okay?” Emily suggested.
“That’ll be good. Come with me, Neal.” Steve led me into the living room.
“A baby grand,” I said looking at the piano taking up half of the room.
“Someone was moving, I helped them out, they helped us out.”
Steve sat on a chair as I walked over to the piano just needing to touch it. “Ivory keys. It must be really old.” The surface of the yellowed keys felt like silk under my fingers.
“Tell me what’s going on.”
I sat on the piano bench.
“Tru brought me home after rehearsal and Joe was there.”
“Was there any explanation why he’s up from New Orleans?”
“No. They were drinking. He smelled like a goat and kissed me. Looked at me in that special way.”
“What way?”
I tried to unearth words without saying the actual words I meant. “He said how much I’d grown.”
“Anything else?”
I took a deep breath. “Toby was...so happy to see him.”
“I know you don’t want to be, but you need to be real specific.”
“Does that include my suspicions?”
“It sure does.”
“Do I have to go back there? Because if he ever finds out I’ve told, this time he’ll kill me. He won’t stop at breaking my leg like last time.”
“You’re not going back.”
I had kept the secrets for so long, I couldn’t make my mouth form the words.
“Let me ask you another question. Do you think he killed Paul?”
***
Twenty minutes later Steve lead me back into the kitchen where Emily was putting soup and sandwiches on the table. “We’re done with the interrogations for the night?”
“Yes.”
“
Where’s Tru?” I asked.
“He’s going to be staying in the apartment over the barn while you’re with us but once he’s finished getting that ready, he’ll be right back.”
“I can go to the barn,” I said. “He shouldn’t have to leave his room because of me.”
“We want you in the house,” Steve said, leaving no leeway for discussion.
Emily handed me a bowl. “We’ll make all the arrangements necessary. You don’t have to worry about anything and you’re not going to school until we’re sure you’ll be safe.”
“Are you going to home school me, too?”
“Yes. Is that okay?”
I tried to smile. “I feel like I’m entering a witness protection program. If I’d seen anything.”
“You know...”
“More than what’s good for me,” I finished for Steve.
“Yes.”
The kitchen door opened and Truly came inside. “I hope banishment doesn’t include restrictions on rehearsing in the evening.”
“Let her get settled in,” Emily said as she sat at the table.
“The homework excuse doesn’t exist anymore,” Truly countered as he sat across from me. “There are hours where she has nothing to do.”
“This has been a difficult day,” Steve added. “Didn’t you already rehearse?”
“Yes, but for only a couple hours. There’s so much to get done,” Truly replied taking a thick roast beef sandwich from the stack in the middle of the table. “I’m not going to be home tomorrow. I have to go to Ithaca.”
Emily filled a bowl with salad and put it by my plate. “Professor Laszlo. You practice and let her relax.”
“Hey. I’m here, I can speak for myself,” I said.
“Absolutely correct,” Emily replied as she pushed salad at Truly. “What would you like to do this evening?”
“I’d like to rehearse.”
Truly did a hand flip. “See?”
Chapter 12
We didn’t really rehearse. It was our first opportunity to explore where we were musically. What did we like, what did we want to play. What could I sing. What could I play. It was a chance to go through everything we had heard and liked but never pursued before.
I had the feeling an earthquake had ripped through his band and Truly was trying to determine what was irrelevant now and should be tossed and what could be kept. For my perspective, I would try to fit in anywhere. I guess I had plenty of practice with that. But, for the band, I could see nothing forcing changes before the Enchanted Garden Canoe thing.
Bad Apple 1: Sweet Cider Page 6
