She smacked my back again. “Then let me down.”
“No!”
“I swear to God, you let me down or you’ll regret it.”
We were only a few feet away from my truck when I felt something wet against my back. She gagged, and I felt it again. Jesus Christ, this wasn’t happening.
“Oh shit,” Ollie said, trying his best to hold back his laughter but failing.
I halted in my step. “Please tell me you didn’t just barf down my back,” I grumbled and flipped off the guys rolling with laughter.
“Sorry,” she replied innocently. “But you can’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“Not once did I hear you tell me you were about to go all exorcist on me.”
I kept her on my back until we reached my truck, and I set her down in the seat. Pulling my shirt over my head, I tossed it onto the ground, and jumped into my cab at the same time the others did. The seat wasn’t that big, so everyone scrunched in, elbows hitting elbows, and bodies smashed into bodies. Tessa was in the middle between Cody and Ollie, who was pushed up against the passenger door.
“There’s a water bottle under there somewhere,” I said, pointing to the floorboard. “Get it for her.”
Ollie bent forward, his head and hand disappearing before jerking back up. “Here,” he said, unscrewing the cap and handing it to Tessa.
“Thank you,” she breathed out, bringing it to her lips and taking a large gulp. She leaned across his lap and grabbed some napkins from the glove compartment.
“We got you girl,” Cody said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side. If it was anyone else doing that, I wouldn’t like it. But these were my best friends, and they knew Tessa was off-limits. “You know we’ve always got your back. Don’t hesitate to call us if you need anything.” Tessa nodded, and he gave her a squeeze.
“You’ve never been like this before, though,” Cody continued, bringing up the touchy subject. “I know you’re going through some shit, but trust me, doing shit like this doesn’t help. It killed my dad.”
Tessa wiped her mouth with a napkin. “I’m not doing anything wrong, you guys. I got drunk at one party.” I opened my mouth to call her out on her lie, but decided against it.
“Yeah, but one turns into two, and then you’re doing it everyday,” he argued.
“I’m not doing drugs. I’m drinking,” she said. “And you better shut it before I puke on you next.”
Cody held his hands up in surrender. “You don’t have to tell me twice,” he nudged her side, and she shot him a small smile.
I dropped the guys off at their houses and headed towards hers. As bad as I wanted to rip her a new asshole for being so damn irresponsible, I held it in. She didn’t need that right now, and we didn’t need another argument.
“Can you get out drunky, or do I need to carry you?” I asked, pulling next to the curb in front of her house.
“Funny,” she grumbled, sliding to the edge of the seat and throwing the door open. This time, though, she was smart enough to not jump out. I came to her side before she changed her mind and face planted onto the ground again. She wasn’t a very coordinated drunk.
“Your parents home?” I asked, stabilizing her, surprised she was actually walking pretty well.
“Yeah, but they’ve probably taken enough sleeping pills to knock out a horse.” She shuffled through her purse and handed me her keys. That hurt me. I hated seeing people I’d looked up to, people I wanted to be like, going down this road.
“You feel like you need to get sick before we go in?” I asked. Her getting sick outside would prevent me from having to clean up a mess inside or anyone hearing her.
She shook her head. “No, I feel better now that it’s all out of my system.”
“And onto my back,” I joked, following her up the stairs, my hand resting on the small of her back to be sure she wouldn’t fall.
“Again, I forewarned you.”
I opened up her bedroom door, flipped on the light, and her bright purple walls came into view. I’d been in there hundreds of times. I’d been in her bed, covered with white, lace blankets and furry pillows, watching movies with her, while Daisy and Tanner ventured off to his bedroom to do their thing.
Nothing had changed, though. Everything was the same and pictures still covered the walls. “You kept them all,” I said, turning around and looking at her. She was down on her knees, sorting through a low dresser drawer, and giving me a great view of her rounded ass. I stumbled back, my mouth growing dry, and my eyes couldn’t leave her body, even if I pried them from their sockets.
“Kept what?” she asked me, looking over her shoulder.
“The pictures.” I gestured to the ones filled with Tanner. “You didn’t take them down.”
She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m a sucker for nostalgia.” She found what she was looking for and shut the drawer. “I’m going to change real quick.” She got up and balanced herself with her dresser before heading to the bathroom.
“How about you get dressed in here and let me jump in the shower.” She raised a brow. I pointed my thumb behind me. “Vomit on my back.”
“Oh,” she said quickly. “There are towels in the closet, and I hate to break it to you, but you’re probably going to smell like passion fruit.”
“It’s better than your regurgitated food.”
I walked into her bathroom and got into the shower. She was right; everything in there was flower or fruit scented. Passion Fruit, Love Spell, Lavender Daisy, where the hell did they come up with all this shit? I opened up a bottle of body wash and got a whiff of something that reminded me of air freshener.
I stepped out of the shower, toweled off, and looked down at my dirty clothes on the floor. I either had to put on my dirty clothes or get something of Tanner’s.
“Not happening,” I whispered to myself. There was no way in hell I was going there. I snagged my boxer briefs and quickly put them back on before walking into her bedroom.
“You’re only wearing those?” Tessa asked, her eyes nearly bulging out of her head, as she situated herself against her pillows. Her gaze swept down from my bare chest to the thin fabric of my boxers.
I pulled down the blankets on the other side of the bed. “Yes, I’m not about to put on shorts that have vomit on them, and we know what happened to my shirt. Just think of it like I’m wearing shorts.”
“Shorts that show me everything you have to offer.”
“Everything I have to offer? Are you trying to ask me something?”
“Nope,” she clipped. “I’m just saying what you’ve offered to other girls.” She turned around to look at me with half of her face smashed against the pillow. Her lips were parted and moist. “Have you ever thought about it?”
“Thought about what?”
“What it would be like being with me?”
Her question caught me off-guard. “I don’t think we should be having this discussion right now when we’re laying in bed half-naked together. Plus, you’ve been drinking.” Again, Tessa always wanted to bring this up when she was intoxicated.
I grabbed my pillow and smacked it a few times before getting comfortable. Strands of hair floated from her face as she blew out a breath. “Just answer the damn question, why do you always have to be so complicated?”
I laughed and pointed to myself. “Me, complicated. You’ve got to be joking.” I reached out and ran my hand over her face. “You, my dear, are the most complicated person I’ve ever met.”
“That’s not true. You’ve always known what I’ve wanted. I’ve laid it out for you countless times. But you, you never tell me. You’ll give me a little and then pull away telling me it’s wrong. I don’t see what’s so wrong with us being together.”
“You need to get to sleep,” I replied. She rolled her eyes, muttered a few smartass remarks before turning off the lamp on her nightstand, and turning her back to me.
The darkness gave me courage. “Yes,” I said,
suddenly.
I couldn’t see her, but I made out the shadow of her turning around and looking at me. “Yes?”
“The answer is yes, I’ve thought about us being together.”
“A lot?” She questioned, her voice perking up.
“Too many times to count. All the time. Every single day.”
“Then why have you never acted on it?”
I sighed hard. “It’s too complicated.”
“Why can’t you make it uncomplicated?”
I paused, wondering if I should tell her about the promise I made Tanner. “I just can’t.”
“And we’re having the same conversation for the millionth time, me telling you to give us a chance, and you shooting me down. You know how hard it is for a girl to get turned down continuously?”
“I’m sorry, I really am, and if circumstances were different, there’s no way in hell I could ever turn you down.” I loved her, and I knew she loved me, but it wasn’t that simple. “You’re smart, you’re beautiful, and the most amazing person I’ve ever met.”
“But still not good enough,” she huffed, turning back around. “Goodnight, Dawson.”
“Don’t be mad.”
“I’m not mad. I’m used to it now. I’ve got myself, and that’s it.”
“Just because we’re not screwing doesn’t mean I’m not here for you. You were like my best friend too, and it kills me to see you doing this to yourself. I want you to be happy. I want you to be with someone who treats you right.”
“But you keep fighting them away from me.”
“I’m fighting away the ones who don’t deserve you, and please don’t say that asshole does.”
“Goodnight, Dawson,” she muttered, closing the conversation.
“Goodnight.” I moved closer to her, making a bold move, and wrapped my arms around her waist. “I’m never going to stop keeping you safe,” I whispered into her ear, pulling her close. She didn’t say anything, just snuggled into me, and tucked her body into mine. It took me hours to fall asleep. I had the girl I’d loved for years trusting me to hold her in my arms and keep her safe like I was her protector. But how was I supposed to protect her without loving her?
I woke up with my arm still winded around Tessa’s sleeping body, and her ass pressed against my fully alert cock. Well shit. I tried to push her forward gently without waking her up, but she mumbled something and pressed into me harder. Taking a deep breath, I did my best to slide out of the sheets and did a tuck-and-roll out of the bed. I silently cursed when a big thud shuddered from my body smacking the floor.
She rolled over and looked at me. “Did you just fall out of bed?” she asked, rubbing her barely open eyes, and yawning.
“Yep,” I said, not wanting her to know I threw myself out before I acted on my sordid thoughts. “Your bed is a little small for the both of us. You practically pushed me off.”
“It’s a full-size bed. I’ve never had any problems.”
“You’ve also never had a guy in your bed,” I said, waiting to see if she’d tell me any differently, but she just stared. “I’ve got to head out,” I told her, walking sideways to the bathroom so she wouldn’t notice my hard on, and grabbing my shorts from the bathroom. I slipped them on and looked at her from the corner. I was sure I was going to be a sight to see leaving her house this early with no shirt and sporting serious bed head.
She nodded. “Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me for watching out for you.” I blinked, looking at her. She looked breathtaking in the morning. Her fair skin was flawless against the light peeking through the blinds as she looked up at me with still-sleepy eyes. Her lips were slightly open and full. Her in the morning was my favorite view. Whenever I’d stay over, I’d always make sure I was awake when she’d come downstairs and start making breakfast for everybody. She’d throw on an old t-shirt, usually one of mine, and wear her tiny pajama shorts as she danced around the kitchen while flipping pancakes. “I’ll always be here. Remember that.”
I walked to her, pressed a kiss on the top of her head, and tucked the blankets tightly around her body. “Now go back to sleep. It’s early.”
She nodded, leaned over, and grabbed a black facemask from the drawer next to her that said, I need my beauty sleep, across it. “Very attractive,” I laughed, watching her slide it over her head and situate the strings carefully behind her ears. “I’ll call you later to check up on you,” I said, walking out of the room. I let out a gasp of air as I tiptoed past her parent’s closed door, and down the stairs.
“Late night?” a voice asked when I hit the bottom stair, and I jumped. I glanced up to find Derrick turned backwards on the couch looking at me. Well, fuck. I didn’t know which one was worse … Derrick or his parents.
“It’s not what it looks like,” I immediately rushed out. What the hell was he even doing up this early? Weren’t middle school kids supposed to sleep in?
He shrugged his shoulders, a giant smile spreading across his face. “Right,” he drew. “But it’s cool. I’d rather her be hooking up with you than anyone else. You pass the brother stamp of approval.” At least I got one that from one brother.
“We aren’t hooking up,” I clarified. The last thing I needed was for him to say that to Tessa.
“Right, I’ll act like I believe your story.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Just don’t say anything to anyone about seeing me, okay?”
He saluted me. “Gotcha. Are we still hanging out today?”
“You know it.” I was tired as hell, but there was no was I bailing on him. “I’ll be here around noon. Think about what you want to do.” I waved goodbye to him smiling, and he turned his attention back to the TV. I walked out of the front door and ducked behind the bushes until a few neighbors went inside before getting in my truck.
“Your father wants to see you,” my mom said when I walked through the back door and into the kitchen. She was sitting at the table, a coffee cup in her hand, and a magazine settled in front of her. She didn’t ask where I’d been this time. She was sober, so she didn’t give two shits. She only did when she was drinking. Man, why do people always tell me their true emotions when they’re wasted? “And I don’t even want to know where your shirt is.”
I yawned, grabbing a glass, and filling it up with orange juice. “Too bad I don’t want to see him. I’m not visiting him, Ma.”
The grip on her coffee cup tightened. “It’s important.”
“It’s always important. He should’ve thought about how badly he wanted to see his family before he did what he did. I have no sympathy for him, and I never will.”
“He’s your father.”
“Sometimes morals are thicker than blood.”
“That’s not true. You don’t have to agree with what he did, but he’s your family, and you need to support him. This isn’t a question, Dawson. It’s a demand. You still live under my roof, and you need to obey my rules. You will go see him.”
I slammed my hand down on the table. “The hell I will.”
“Oh, you will. Be there, tomorrow morning at ten. Don’t be late, or I’ll have your things packed, and you can stay somewhere else.”
“You need to get over that prick,” I mumbled, leaving the kitchen, and kicking my door shut. I punched the back of it before sticking my fist in my mouth to keep me from saying what I really wanted to tell her. I couldn’t believe she wanted me to go see him. I despised him. He was nothing but a loser, why the fuck did she love him? If I went, I couldn’t fake loving him. I couldn’t fake being nice to him. And that’s what she expected me to do.
“Call of Duty?” Derrick asked, jumping on the couch and grabbing a controller. We’d played ball for a few hours and then got pizza after I’d picked him up. Tessa was still in bed, and I told him not to wake her up. She was going to feel like shit today.
“Maybe later, I’m going to talk to Tessa,” I answered, grabbing the to-go box and heading up the stairs.
H
e laughed. “Okay, you can go talk to her.”
I snapped my fingers at him and pointed at him. “Not funny.”
“Hey, I’m not dumb. I know what you people do in high school.”
I shook my head, and knocked on her closed bedroom door. “Come in.” I twisted the doorknob to find her lying down in bed, her feet facing the headboard, and her head at the end of the bed as she watched the TV on the dresser in front of her.
“Brought you some pizza,” I said, holding up the warm box in my hand.
“Thank you,” she said, reaching for the box, opening it up and taking a large bite. “I’m starving.”
I sat down on the edge of her bed. “So have you talked to douchebag?” I asked casually.
She wiped cheese from the side of her face. “And by douchebag you mean?”
“Don’t play with me, you know exactly who I’m talking about.”
She focused on eating her pizza. “He called me earlier.”
“And you answered?”
She took a bite, wiped her mouth, and sighed heavily. “Yes.”
“Why?” I asked in shock. There was no way she could forgive that asshole for how he’d acted and the way he’d talked to her. She needed more than a guy who drank himself into oblivion and grabbed other girls’ asses to taunt her. “Were you too drunk to remember what happened last night?”
“He was drinking, and it hurt his feelings when I left with you. He told me you threatened him and said if he keeps talking to me you’d kick his ass.” She lifted up, tucking her knees under her ass, and set the box on the floor. “You can’t do that, Dawson. Can you understand how me leaving like that would hurt his feelings?” My mouth hung open as I waited for her to realize what she’d just said. This wasn’t happening. She couldn’t actually feel sorry for this asshole and believe his bullshit excuses. “I’d get mad if he did the same to me.”
“First of all, I think him grabbing other girls’ asses and practically dry humping them in front of you is worse than you leaving with a goddamned sober driver. I also didn’t threaten him to stay away from you. I simply told him if he hurt you I’d kick his ass. Don’t let him use the whole “I was drunk” excuse to feel sorry for him. That’s not okay.”
Revive Me Page 8
