Turning the taps back off, he cursed again. It would take a million years to get the water hot at this rate. Whoever was at his door, he intended to make them go away quick. He was in no mood. Rather than get dressed, he just grabbed a towel from the shelf and wrapped it around his waist as he half stumbled to the door.
Yanking it open he found himself face to face with the woman who was responsible for his misery. Josie stood there looking almost as miserable as he felt. There was just enough meanness in him to appreciate that. He let his eyes wander, taking her in from head to toe. She was wearing a sweater dress and a pair of the high heeled boots she favored, but there were dark circles under her eyes and she looked more than a little green around the gills.
“You look awful,” she said.
“You don’t look much better.” The retort was snappy, his tone clipped. He didn’t know what the hell she was doing there, but it probably wasn’t good.
“Let me in, Carter,” she said clearly in no mood to tolerate his shit.
“Afraid somebody will see you out there?”
“No. But I am afraid of freezing my tail off. Stop being an asshole!”
He shrugged and stepped back, leaving the door open for her to come inside. He was being a dick and it was only partially because of the hangover. Crying over her wasn’t an option, so that left being a first class prick.
“What do you want, Josephine?”
“To talk… there are a few things we need to clear up,” she said softly.
“Like what?”
“Jordan Simmons.”
Just the name made him want to punch something. He didn’t believe for a second that Josie had any interest in that pompous little shit. It had been a knee jerk reaction when he’d first seen them together. Jealousy was an ugly feeling and one he wasn’t accustomed to. But later on, when he’d been thinking more clearly, it had bothered him for other reasons.
If Josie walked down Main Street with Simmons, people would smile and nod, perfectly pleased with the pairing up of the current minister’s daughter and the minister in training. It didn’t matter that Simmons was a first class asshole and a sneaky piece of shit. He played the game, he looked the part and everyone in town bowed and scraped to him. Meanwhile, they looked at him like he was something dirty they’d stepped in.
“I don’t have fuck all to say about Jordan Simmons. He’s a smarmy shit and we both know it.”
She raised her eyebrows at that. “Funny, you seemed to have a very different take on things the other day.”
“I flew off the handle a little. That’s what I do.”
“No, it isn’t. You don’t have some wild temper. You don’t yell or scream or get mad… Except with me. I make you crazy,” she said. “Because I’m a giant pain in the ass.”
He didn’t disagree with her. Every bit of that was true. She was also sweet, and so damn pretty it hurt to look at her sometimes, and funny, and unfailingly kind. And her being a pain in the ass wasn’t always a flaw. At times, it was one of the things he liked best about her. His cupcake didn’t take any shit.
“You do make me crazy,” he said. “In a lot of ways.”
She moved deeper into the room and perched on the arm of the couch. “You’re right to be mad at me, to tell me to stop being so scared of other people’s opinions… The only opinion that ought to matter to me is yours.”
That brought him up short. Standing there in nothing but a towel and reeking of bourbon and heaven only knew what else, he just couldn’t make sense of it. “Why would my opinion be the only one that matters?”
“Did you mean what you said last night? That you wanted to be the man who loved me?”
Fuck, he had not meant to say that. Being pissed and drunk made him too damned honest for his own good. But there was no taking it back. “Hell, Josie… I am the man who loves you. Do you honestly think I’d have snuck around and carried on the way I did with you for any other reason? If all I wanted was to get laid, I could have done that without working nearly as hard.”
“Well, that’s pretty.”
He chuckled a little. In spite of his shitty mood, his aching head, and the fact that his guts clearly no longer wanted to stay on the inside, her caustic tone still managed to tickle him. “It’s the truth. There are a lot of women in this town who would have been more than happy to parade around with me… at least for the short term. That’s what I am to most of them. Short term. The guy you have fun with before you go and find one to settle down with that has a good job and a solid future and a stable income.”
“You have all those things. I know how hard you work to help Savannah with Revision,” she protested. “You’re not just an employee there, Carter. You’re a partner.”
“People don’t see me that way. They don’t want to. They’ve got ideas about who I am and they’re comfortable with ‘em. Same way with you. People wouldn’t bat an eye if you walked out with Simmons because to their mind, you all belong together. The one place you don’t belong would be with me.” It hurt to admit that. It stung like a hundred slivers of glass slicing into him at once.
“They’re wrong,” she said, softly. “I’m a hypocrite, Carter. I curse. I drink. I have hot, steamy affairs with the town bad boy. And I do it all while looking down my nose at people who look down their nose at me… I’m not perfect. I’m not even good most of the time. I just hide all the wickedness so no one sees.”
“That isn’t true… well, not all of that is true.”
Josie shrugged. “Close enough to truth. But I don’t want to be that person… I don’t want to pretend to be something I’m not. Especially if it means I can’t have you.”
Carter didn’t want to hope. He was afraid to let himself. “I can’t keep being your secret, Josie.”
“I’m not asking you to be… I came here this morning to invite you to church with me.”
He blinked at her. Then he blinked some more. “What?”
Josie smiled even though it did little to alleviate her general appearance of misery. “I talked to my Mom… Really talked to her, about things that I—let’s just say that she helped me see myself a little more clearly. And she also told me that if I wanted to be with you, I needed to just do it and stop hiding. She also said that there isn’t a more public way of announcing to the whole of Fontaine that you’re seeing someone than going to church together.”
Carter couldn’t wrap his head around that. Not any of it. Not Deborah Marcum telling her daughter to date him openly. He sure as hell couldn’t fathom Josie asking him to attend church with her. By Fontaine standards that was practically announcing an engagement.
“You’re gonna have to run that by me again,” he finally managed.
She rolled her eyes and then enunciated very carefully, “Will you go to church with me?”
“When?”
“Tomorrow is Sunday,” she said.
Carter felt panic rearing. He hadn’t stepped foot in a church other than attending funerals since he was a kid. But to walk into church with the preacher’s daughter and sit there during the sermon under his disapproving eye? That just sounded like the very definition of hell.
“I’ll make you a deal, Josie… I’ll go to church with you tomorrow morning if you go out with me tonight. I’ll pick you up, take you to dinner. We’ll sit out in public in full view of everyone and act like two people who don’t have a thing to hide.”
The smile that curved her lips was so beautiful it took his breath. She looked happy and freer than he’d ever seen her. “I’d like that. I’d like that a lot… But now, I have to get to work. If I’m late, Doris will murder me.”
“Probably not murder… Doris’ real talent lies in just making you wish you were dead.”
Josie walked over to him and stood up on her tiptoes. She kissed his cheek and then wrinkled her nose. “Carter, I hope you’re planning on taking a shower sometime soon because you reek.”
“I’ll get on that,” he said. “How much wine did you dr
ink last night, Josie?”
“Enough that I’m going to have to use all my patience and a lot of prayer to survive Doris today,” she quipped as she turned toward the door. “Where are you taking me tonight?”
“Dress up. Nice. It’s not every day you get to take the person you’re in love with on a first date,” he called after her, ignoring the fact that raising his voice made his head feel like it was going to split wide open. Some things were just worth it.
Josie was still smiling. It had been hours since she’d confronted Carter at his apartment, since she’d found all the courage she needed to just say to hell with it. People would talk and she would let them. If they were talking about her and Carter it was because they didn’t have enough going on in their own lives to keep them entertained. Not even Doris could dampen her mood.
At that thought, Josie looked up and caught Doris giving her the stink eye from the circulation desk. Okay, maybe Doris could dampen her mood. But really that wasn’t important in the over all scheme of things because Doris could dampen anyone’s mood. With her beady eyes, too stiff hair, turned down mouth and the general air of discontent that hovered around her, Doris was a walking and talking depressant.
Taking another book from the cart, Josie re-shelved it where it belonged. It was an annoying aspect of her job that re-shelving books was all she was permitted to do. She had a degree in library science, she had ideas for programs to make the library better, to bring people there and make it the center of their community. But as long as Doris reigned supreme, none of that would ever happen.
Picking up another book, Josie glanced at the cover. It was a torrid romance novel, the couple on the front locked in a heated embrace. That would be her. Tonight. It had been almost a week since she’d been in Carter’s arms. And she needed him.
“For Pete’s sake, Josephine! How long does it take you to re-shelve a book?”
Josie looked up to see Doris at the end of the stacks. The weight of disapproval in her stare was tangible. At any other time, Josie would have backed down immediately. She would have apologized and promised to do better. But the truth was, there was nothing wrong with the rate at which she was re-shelving books. There was nothing wrong with her job performance at all. She was actually more qualified to be head librarian than Doris, which was most certainly, a big part of the problem she had with Josie..
“I’m sorry, Doris… am I not scurrying quickly enough for you?” Josie asked, her voice saccharine sweet.
Sarcasm was apparently lost on Doris. “No, you’re not. You’re dawdling and taking your own sweet time about this and there are more carts to be re-shelved!”
Josie looked pointedly at the circulation desk where Doris’ sister-in-law and her cousin, both library employees, were pouring over the donated magazines and divvying up the best ones between them. “And there are more employees who can get to them… Or do I need to approach the County Commissioner about the fact that your relatives are part-time employees who act more like patrons!”
“I can’t fire you,” Doris said. “Not without their approval, but I can make your life a living hell every moment that you’re here.”
“And that would be different how? You’ll give me dirty looks? You’ll pawn all the crap jobs off on me while your family stuff their faces and read the latest tabloids? Oh, I know… you’ll remind me every day that I’m not wanted here and you’ll do whatever you can to get rid of me!” Josie was shouting by the time she reached the end of her list. “But you already do those things, Doris. Every day I come to work I stand here, re-shelving books like a trained monkey while your idiot cousin who’s never read an actual book in her life is in charge of acquisitions! You haven’t offered any new community events that aren’t a stale rehash of what you’ve done for the last seventeen years!”
“Get your things and go home,” Doris snapped. “I can’t fire you, but I can suspend you. And if the commissioner doesn’t like it, now I have witnesses to your unprofessional behavior. And don’t think you fooled anyone here. We all know you’ve been carrying on with Carter Hayes!”
“You’re right,” Josie said. “I have been carrying on with him. In my house. His house. In his truck. Wherever and whenever we can! But I haven’t done it here at the library, Doris, so you can’t use that against me… What I do on my own time, in my personal life, has no bearing on my ability to do my job here. The only thing that keeps me from being an asset to this library is the fact that you’re such a nepotistic jackass you won’t let me be! And you go ahead and suspend me. With pay. I’ll be filing a formal complaint with the County Commissioner about the hostile work environment you’ve created here… and I’ll be formally requesting an audit of just how library funds have been spent.”
Josie marched past Doris, as an afterthought she turned around and thrust the steamy romance novel at her. “You should read that. It might improve your disposition.”
Gathering her purse and her coat from behind the desk, she ignored the curious stares and all the whispers from all the people who had somehow gathered in the library’s central hall while she’d been all but shouting at her boss. One day, she thought, I will learn to control my temper and my mouth. But she was glad she hadn’t done it yet. Doris needed to be told off, among other things.
As she walked out, Josie realized exactly what she’d done and all that she’d said. It would be all over town. She had to warn Carter, but first, she had to get to the County Commissioner’s office before Doris twisted everything around on her. Before she did anything though, she was going home to change into something that didn't induce depression. If she never put on another pair of those godawful khaki pants as long as she lived, she’d be a happy woman.
One of these days, she thought, I will learn to just keep my mouth shut.
15
Carter was moving another cabinet for Savannah. She’d decided that the antique quilts didn’t need to be displayed on a rack but should be folded up in an armoire the way they might be displayed in someone’s home. She’d also changed her mind about fifteen times on which piece of furniture she wanted to use for the display and where in the store she wanted it.
The bell above the door chimed again and Carter looked up, noting the remarkable number of people milling about. All of them seemed to be giving him the side eye and whispering. What the fuck was going on?
“What have you done?” Savannah asked.
Carter snapped his head back around and glared at her, ignoring the stabbing pain behind his eyes. “Why do you just assume I did something?’
Savannah leaned in and grabbed him by the ear the same way their grandmother used to. “The last time we had this much foot traffic on a non-holiday, it was right after Bennett dove into the creek after Mia. People aren’t here to buy furniture, Carter. They’re here for gossip… so what have you done? Oh, this better not be bad!”
He didn’t know. Truly. But he had a sneaking suspicion that the truth about him and Josie had hit the fan. He swatted at Savannah’s hands. “Let go of my damn ear! Jesus! You’re vicious!”
“Tell me, Carter,” Savannah demanded. “I am not playing with you!”
“I really don’t know,” he said quietly, “But I suspect that maybe they might have heard I’m dating Josie Marcum.”
Savannah glowered at him. “Everyone else’s definition of dating, Carter, or yours?”
“What the hell does that mean?” he demanded.
“Most people call dating going out to dinner, being quasi-committed and monogamous… you call it dating if you’re willing to go back for the underwear you left behind rather than writing it off as a loss!”
“I’m dating Josie,” he said. “We’ve been seeing each other discreetly for a while… but I’m taking her on a real date tonight. And I’m going to church with her in the morning.”
He watched as Savannah opened and then closed her mouth several times, not quite able to speak. Finally she blinked at him and asked. “Church, really? With her dad s
taring down at you from the pulpit?”
Yeah, the thought of that made him sweat. “I know. But this is serious, Van. She’s it for me.”
“How long has this been going on?” she asked in a whisper.
“About a month and a half.”
Considering that he’d barely ever gone out with the same woman more than twice, and he had never referred to any woman as being it for him, they both knew what he was saying.
“Holy shit.”
“I need to take off… I’ve got to get some things ready before tonight, and I don’t think me being in here is such a good idea.”
She looked at all the people just milling around, not buying anything. One of them was so busy watching Carter that she backed into a glass fronted cabinet, sending everything in it wobbling. “Go. Get the hell out before they wreck everything.”
Carter went out the back, using the workroom exit to get to the alley and his truck. He stopped short at the sight of Josie standing there. It was just after lunch which meant she was late going back, an unlikely occurrence, or she wasn’t going back.
“You playing hooky from work, cupcake?” She was wearing her coat, open over the sweater dress that clung to every curve and a pair of black high heeled boots that made him think very dirty things. Leaning against the hood of his truck, she looked like a pinup girl from days gone by. His eyes raked over her from head to toe and it dawned on him that he didn’t want to date Josie. He wanted to marry her.
“I kind of think I might not be employed anymore,” she admitted. “I, in perfectly professional terminology, kind of told Doris to kiss my ass.”
“You’re feeling a little impulsive today, aren’t you?” he asked. There was an idea flitting around in his mind. It was crazy. It was completely crazy. But then so were they. Everything about them defied convention.
“Just a little bit… I may also have managed to get her fired. At the very least I’m getting her ass audited.”
That raised his eyebrows. “Remind me not to piss you off… On the off chance, did you telling her to kiss your ass also involve you telling her about me? Because half of Fontaine is traipsing through the store right now trying to get the scoop.”
Carter (Bourbon & Blood Book 3) Page 11
