‘It’s not fair to blame me, Clare. I’ve done everything I could to support Marcie even though from the beginning I thought that her wedding ideas were high on the bonkers scale. I didn’t see you or Mum or Jane exactly volunteering to go bungee jumping or trampolining or dressing up as a gorilla and making a berk of yourselves.’
‘I had to work but I doubt I’d have done it anyway. In fact, I knew it would all go wrong,’ said Clare, ‘as soon as I saw that stupid list.’
‘So you thought it was mad too?’
‘Yes, course, but I never actually thought she was going to take it seriously. I credited her with more of a brain. So the wedding’s off, I take it?’
‘I think so.’
‘Has she told Sam?’
‘She called him not long after we left the fancy dress shop.’
‘How did he take it?’
‘Badly, I think.’
‘Where is she?’
I jerked my thumb towards the kitchen and off she went. I couldn’t decide what to do or where to go. My head was spinning with choices.
Go into the kitchen with the others? But when Mum wasn’t blaming me, Clare was going on about what a let-down men were or Marcie was crying, so the kitchen wasn’t a great option.
Stay put? I could stay in the hall and phone Demi or Maryam, who had gone home for their supper. Maybe not. What could they say? Or maybe I should – they’re my mates after all and understand the situation better than anyone. But then, maybe they’d had enough of it all.
Bedroom? Should I go upstairs for a cuddle with Sergeant Ted? He was a teddy bear – what could he do? But then cuddling him always made me feel better.
Bathroom? Have a lovely long relaxing bubble bath?
Or should I go back in and see Marcie? Maybe I should run her a bath?
I took a step towards the kitchen. No, that didn’t feel right.
I took a step for the stairs. No, I’d feel out of things up there.
Bathroom? No, it would be wrong to lock myself away at a time like this.
Oh God! Decisions, decisions. WHY CAN I NEVER MAKE UP MY MIND? Things can’t possibly get any worse, I thought, when the phone rang. As there was no movement coming from the kitchen, I picked up. It was Sam.
‘Oh!’ I gulped. ‘Hi. Um . . . Sam. I, er . . . do you want Marcie?’
‘No, Chloe, I wanted to talk to you.’ He sounded sad.
‘Oh well, here I am, yes, it’s me,’ I said, trying to sound bright and cheerful although that was the last thing I was feeling. ‘And how are you?’
‘How do you think I am, Chloe? How do you think I am?’
Not happy, that’s for sure, I thought. I can tell that much from your voice. ‘Er . . . ooh . . . Are you sure you don’t want to talk to Marcie? She is here, in the kitchen.’
‘Marcie has made it very clear that she doesn’t want to speak to me. Not now. Not ever again. Says I don’t know about the true meaning of love. Says you do. Do you, Chloe? Because if you do, maybe you could let me know what it is because it’s a mystery to me.’
‘Me? I don’t know anything.’
‘So what should I do? I do love her, you know. More than anything. She is The One and she always has been, but now she hates me for not understanding what she wanted. But how was I to know? How is any bloke to know what women want? And now I’ve lost her.’
‘Maybe not—’ I started.
‘I have. She said it’s thanks to you.’
‘Thanks to me? No, Sam. All I have tried to do is go along with the plan.’
‘But you never really liked me. did you? Did you say something to turn her against me?’
‘I . . . Um. No. Not really.’ But too late – he’d heard the hesitation in my voice. ‘OK. I might have said something about you not listening to what she wanted.’
‘But she never said. I thought she was OK with the list.’
‘I think she wanted to make you happy. Listen. Let me try and persuade her to talk to you. Hold on.’
I put the phone down and raced along the hall to where Marcie was.
‘Sam on the phone,’ I said urgently. ‘Will you talk to him? He sounds ever so sorry.’
Marcie shook her head. ‘Too late,’ she said.
I went back to the phone. ‘Sam, you there? She won’t come—’
I was about to say that I would keep trying but he’d hung up.
I put down the phone and burst into tears. Now everyone is unhappy, I thought. I hate weddings. Suddenly I knew exactly where I wanted to go. I wanted to go upstairs to my bed, get under the duvet with Sergeant Ted and never come out again.
Chapter Twelve
Meeting the Planets
‘So what are you going to do?’ asked Demi when I met up with her and Maryam at lunch break on Monday.
‘I’ve decided, I’m going to go into Osbury after school. I’m going to find Nessa and give her back the Zodiac phone and tell her that I don’t want to be a Zodiac Girl or have anything to do with it any more.’
‘But why?’ asked Maryam. ‘It’s not her fault.’
‘Yes it is. Sam thinks that it’s my fault that Marcie called the wedding off, that I talked her out of it, but I didn’t, not really. OK, I may have said a few things but I never thought this would happen. The last few weeks have been the weirdest of my life, and ever since I won that stupid Zodiac thing and Nessa started giving me advice, everything has gone wrong. All that stuff about not resisting. Maybe if I give the prize back, that will fix it. Tell them to let some other girl be the Zodiac Girl.’
‘I’ll do it! If I didn’t have choir rehearsal tonight, I’d come with you and tell them myself,’ said Maryam. I’d love to be a Zodiac girl and have someone like Nessa give me advice.’
‘And me,’ said Demi. ‘If I didn’t have orchestra after school, I’d say I’d be the Zodiac Girl. I reckoned it looked fun and there are two weeks left. Who knows what could happen? And Uri said that there could only be one girl chosen at a time. One girl, one month. Remember? So yeah, maybe if you back out, one of us can be it – I bet there are loads more wedding goodies to try out.’
Hearing Demi and Maryam enthuse about being a Zodiac Girl threw me and made me wonder if I’d made the wrong decision. Maybe it wasn’t Nessa’s fault. Oh no, I thought, here I go again! Can’t make a decision and stick to it.
‘Well, for me it’s been a curse, not a blessing,’ I said as the bell rang and we gathered our things up to go into afternoon class. Or has it been a blessing? I asked myself as we made our way to the science labs. Yes, being blamed for breaking up Marcie’s engagement was bad but trying out the list of wedding options has been fun in the end. It has. Shall I give Nessa another chance? See what else she has in store? Oh God, another decision. ‘I think I am going mad,’ I said.
‘Going mad? You always were,’ teased Demi.
‘No, really. I hate being a Libran. It’s supposed to be a nice sign, easy-going, balanced, but I think it’s the worst sign of the whole Zodiac, like – being able to see both sides, it means that it’s hard to make a decision about anything, I’m always so busy weighing up and making sure that what I decide is balanced.’
‘You can’t change your birth sign though,’ said Maryam. ‘It’s not like changing your name.’
‘I know, so that’s it then. I am doomed for life, cursed for eternity, I will forever not be able to make up my mind about anything and so will have to suffer the consequences. God, now I’m depressed as well as going mad.’
‘So make a few decisions,’ said Maryam. ‘Defy the traits of your birth sign and make a few choices. In fact, we are going to have to do that at the beginning of next week anyway. Remember, our subjects for next year?’
‘Oh that. Arghhhhhh! I’d forgotten about all that over the weekend. What with Marcie blubbing all over the place and everyone blaming me and Sam mad with me and being in the doghouse, I’d totally forgotten about deciding what stupid course I want to take.’
Demi squeezed my
arm. ‘So now you’re going mad, and you’re depressed and stressed too,’ she said.
I nodded. ‘And it’s only Monday! So, OK, I am going to make a choice and this is it. I am going to go to Osbury, talk to Nessa and ask just what this whole Zodiac thing is all about. She said she was my guardian and here to help, so get me out of this mess, Nessa – let’s see if you can!’
Demi glanced at Maryam. ‘I suppose it’s a start,’ she said.
Maryam took my other arm. ‘And we love you whatever you decide or don’t. To us, you’re just Chloe, our lovely mate who can never make up her mind.’
After school, I caught the bus as usual but instead of getting off at my stop to go home, I stayed on the bus until it got to Osbury. I’d texted Nessa in the afternoon break and said I’d like to come and see her and she texted back that she’d be in the Europa cafe and that it was perfect timing for me to meet up with her and the others. Yeah, right, I’d thought.
Once off the bus, I made my way over the green where the wedding show had been held and saw Europa in front of me. It looked warm and cosy inside and I was looking forward to one of the fantastic hot chocolate drinks that Joe, who runs the place, makes. Inside, the cafe was empty apart from Joe who was busy behind his counter. He looked up and smiled when he saw me. ‘Ah, Zodiac Girl,’ he said. ‘Welcome.’
‘Quiet night,’ I replied. ‘Where is everybody?’
‘Here in a moment,’ he said. ‘Nessa said you wanted to talk. Until then, sit, sit, and I’ll bring you your special.’
I did as I was told and soon after, he brought me a cup of steaming hot chocolate. ‘Hmm, delicious,’ I said as I took the first sip. It really was like nothing I had ever tasted before, with just the perfect balance of chocolate and creaminess. Soon after, Nessa and Uri arrived, followed by PJ and Hermie. They gave me a wave then went to get their drinks. One, two, three, four, five. Five of the planet wedding company, I thought. I wonder where the other five are.
Hermie, who was looking as handsome as ever, moved a couple of tables together and beckoned me over to sit with them.
‘So, Chloe,’ said Nessa once everyone was settled. ‘You wanted our advice.’
‘Yes. I mean no. I mean—’
All five of them burst out laughing.
‘Why are you laughing?’ I asked.
‘Because that’s so typically Libran – yes, no, can’t make up your mind,’ Nessa replied.
‘Tell me about it. It’s been a nightmare lately. I feel like I’ve been going mad.’
The five nodded solemnly and I felt like they understood.
‘What exactly is the problem?’ asked Hermie.
‘Oh, just everything,’ I began and before I knew it, I was telling the whole story from the very beginning, from when I started the Bridesmaids’ Club to last weekend when Sam appeared as unhappy as Marcie and thinking that maybe I turned her against him. They didn’t interrupt or make faces like they were judging me, they just listened. ‘So that’s it, really,’ I said when I had finished.
‘Hmm, a right mess,’ said Joe.
‘You can say that again,’ I said.
‘Hmm, a right mess,’ Joe repeated, then grinned.
‘But what about you, Chloe?’ asked Nessa. ‘I see you’ve ’ad a difficult angle with Mars in your ’oroscope. Is there something else that you’re not tellin’ us about?’
‘Er . . . yes . . . no, um, Mars. That’s listed as Mario on the phone, isn’t it? So why haven’t I met him then?’
‘Oh, you will,’ Nessa replied. ‘Soon in fact. ’E deals with goals and ambitions. That’s ’is area. Ring a bell?’
‘Sort of. School. Everyone’s on about what we’re going to be when we leave, like what job do we want to do, so yes, that’s been hard too. Goals and ambitions. See, I haven’t a clue.’
The five of them laughed again.
‘Why do you keep laughing?’ I asked. ‘It’s so not funny. In fact these past weeks have been the hardest in my life. I just don’t get this whole Zodiac Girl thing.’
‘Some Zodiac Girls get who we really are,’ said Hermie.
‘And ozzers don’t. They rationalize vot happens to zem to fitting zeir understandings of zeir world,’ said PJ.
‘Like Chloe,’ said Nessa. ‘Doesn’t matter though, does it?’
‘Maybe it does,’ said PJ.
Make up your minds, I thought as I tried to make sense of what they were trying to tell me. Whatever one said, a moment later another contradicted it. For a second I wondered if they were making fun of me by mimicking my trouble making up my mind.
‘Are you making fun of me?’ I asked.
Uri grinned. ‘Maybe, maybe not.’
‘There are two sides to every situation,’ added Nessa. ‘Nothin’ wrong with that.’
‘Unless it messes your head up,’ said Hermie, jutting his chin in my direction.
‘Exactly,’ I said. ‘It can really mess your head up and has done mine. I don’t know what to think or do for the best any more and that’s why I needed to see you. I need your help.’
‘What can we do?’ asked Nessa. ‘We’ve been through your wedding options.’
‘I need to get Marcie and Sam back together. OK, she was freaked by his mad wedding list but I think that she genuinely does love him. She’s been so miserable since they broke up and he sounded really upset too.’
‘Ah,’ said Nessa. ‘True love. Now that I do know about.
‘Marcie said that I had shown her about love, and in doing that I had made her see that Sam wasn’t there for her,’ I explained. ‘I didn’t mean to do that.’
Ah,’ said Joe. ‘But a break might be good for them. Absence makes ze heart grow fonder.’
‘No, sometimes absence makes the heart grow cold and forget,’ said Uri.
‘So what is love then?’ I asked. ‘How do you know when it’s true?’
‘You feel beautiful and everythin’ feels ’armonious,’ said Nessa.
‘No,’ said PJ. ‘Eet can also be ze pain, passion, torment, a sweet agony but you can’t escape, like an addiction.’
‘No. It’s when you feel your very best with someone and they feel their very best with you,’ said Nessa.
‘No,’ said Uri. ‘It’s when you can be your worst with someone and they still love you, like first thing in the morning when you haven’t even combed your hair or when you’re having a lousy day and don’t feel like seeing anyone.’
‘No,’ said Joe. ‘It’s more simple than that. Love is unconditional. You will do and go anywhere for someone without expectations. The minute there are expectations, then it’s not true love, it’s selfish love.’
‘But people are only human,’ said Nessa
‘But love is divine,’ said Hermie. ‘I think true love is when you and your lover are in true communication, like you know what each other thinks and feels.’
‘No,’ said PJ. ‘It’s a journey, a learning process.’
They’re making fun again, and talk about confusing! I thought as I watched them put forward different arguments and angles and points of view. It was like watching a ball at a tennis match. One side and then the other, back again, then back again, and everything everybody said seemed to be right. Actually, it was like living inside my head, always seeing one side and then the other. These planet wedding people weren’t being any help at all. They were as confused as I was and couldn’t agree on anything.
‘I don’t think you know any more than I do,’ I said.
Nessa smiled. ‘Yes and no. We were demonstratin’ that it’s true, there are always many sides to every situation and although confusin’ sometimes, Chloe, seein’ the various angles is what will give you your strength.’
‘Strength to do what?’
‘Whatever you decide to do in your future,’ said Uri.
‘My future. What about now? What about Sam? How can I help him to get Marcie back?’
‘Hmm. First Sam has to let Marcie go,’ said Uri. ‘If love is true, if
you let it go and it keeps coming back, then it is meant to be.’
PJ scoffed. ‘How idealistic is zat? No. You have to vork at it to make love happen. Tell her how he is feelings, voo her to vin her heart again.’
‘’E shouldn’t be too intense though, or desperate,’ said Nessa ‘Tell Sam to pursue ’er with beautiful things, flowers, perfume, chocolates.’
‘Or maybe she should forget him and move on,’ said Uri.
This time I laughed. ‘You lot can’t make your mind up about anything! You really are worse than me. All you do is contradict each other. You know what? I am going to decide.’
They all nodded like children who had been reprimanded.
‘Good,’ said Nessa. ‘What are you going to do?’
‘Romance,’ I said. ‘That’s something us Librans know about. I am going to call Sam and tell him that in order to win Marcie back, he needs to romance her back. I like your plan, Nessa. A lovely evening. Flowers. Maybe a restaurant with gypsy music. Champagne. Moonlight.’
Nessa was watching me with a proud expression. ‘Exactly,’ she said.
But then another thought occurred to me. ‘Or do you think the saying ‘Treat them mean to keep them keen’ is true? He shouldn’t call her and then she’ll miss him and think about him. Sometimes people want what they can’t have.’
PJ nodded. ‘Zat iz true. Ze lure of ze unattainable.’
‘No,’ said Nessa. ‘Maybe in the beginnin’, but these two are far down the line. They were engaged, for goodness sake. Way past the time of playin’ games. No, Chloe, you tell Sam that if ’e doesn’t want to lose Marcie, ’e has to swallow ’is pride, buy the most beautiful bunch of flowers ’e can find, and keep pursuin’ ’er like ’e’s ’er slave until she gives in.’
‘I agree,’ I said. ‘He must romance her.’
‘So what are you waitin’ for?’ asked Nessa with a smile.
Joe got up and got a piece of paper and six pens. ‘For ze plan,’ he said.
‘Excellent,’ I said as I took a pen and wrote the word ‘Romance’ at the top of the paper.
Bridesmaids' Club Page 9
