A Cry For Hope (ARC)

by Beth Rinyu

  I took a deep breath and responded, “Yeah, we do.”

  She smiled as she moved the wand slightly on my belly before stopping. “It’s a…”

  I got into my car and sent Jamie a quick text. I’m sorry. I got held up. On my way now.

  I stopped off at the store and picked up a red balloon, his favorite color, and a banana split cake, his favorite cake. Being mid-October, the summer crowds were long gone, allowing me to find a parking spot with ease. I grabbed the cake and placed it in the picnic basket, holding on tightly to the balloon that was blowing lightly in the breeze. As I walked on to the mostly desolate beach, I spotted Jamie and Grace right away. They were sitting on a blanket close to the water. Jamie had his back to me with Grace in his arms as they both stared out at the ocean. I smiled and walked closer, stopping myself to listen once I got into earshot of the conversation that Jamie was having with Grace.

  “You know, you are reminding me more and more of your big brother each day. I wish you could have met him. He would have loved you. You see those rocks out there?” He pointed out into the water, while Grace looked up at him as if she understood every word he was saying. “They have the most beautiful sand dollars. Your brother and I used to collect them for your mommy. They’re her favorite. When you get a little older, we’ll go out there and find some more.” He kissed her on the top of her head. “You are my angel, Grace. Because of you, I got a second chance at being a dad and a second chance with your mommy. I promise to be the best daddy ever because I love you and your mommy more than anything in this world.”

  I pushed a strand of hair that was blowing in my face behind my ear and wiped away a tear. I walked over to the blanket and bent down, giving them both a kiss.

  Grace flashed me a huge smile and cooed when she saw me. “Sorry I’m late,” I said.

  I placed the picnic basket down on the blanket and tied the balloon around the handle. I took out the cake and carefully placed eleven candles, plus an extra one for good luck. After fighting with the breeze, I finally got all of them lit. I took Jamie’s hand in mine and we began to sing.

  “Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Charlie. Happy birthday to you.” I smiled at Jamie and kissed him softly before taking Grace from his arms so he could cut the cake. He parted my lips, feeding me a spoonful, then kissing me to remove the excess whipped cream from my mouth.

  “Do you remember how much he loved this cake?” I smiled.

  “Remember? How could I forget? I was the one stuck cleaning up his throw up after he snuck downstairs and ate the entire cake on his sixth birthday.”

  I began to giggle. “Oh, my god! I forgot about that!”

  I smiled to myself, realizing how far Jamie and I had come. We were able to talk about Charlie and laugh instead of cry. We were celebrating his life instead of mourning his death.

  “So, do you think you’ll be able to get Grace into baseball like Charlie was?” I asked.

  “Hell, yeah. Just because she’s a girl doesn’t mean she’s going to miss out on any of the fun.” He leaned over and kissed her head.

  I looked down at Grace. She was growing so quickly. Her double-dimpled smile and her deep brown eyes would always be a pleasant reminder of my very best friend. “I can’t believe she’s seven months old, and I really can’t believe Charlie would have been eleven today.”

  “Correction, Charlie is eleven today,” Jamie said, raising his eyebrows. “Remember, he’s still alive in here.” He placed his hand on my heart. I took his hand in mine and kissed it.

  “Thank you,” I said.

  “For what?”

  “For coming back to me. For being my husband again. For being the best daddy in the world to Grace.”

  “No, thank you, Hope. You never gave up on us. You loved me when I was at my worst, and you gave me this beautiful little girl that I adore just as much as her mommy.”

  I handed Grace to Jamie and untied the balloon from the picnic basket, taking the string and attaching the note that Jamie and I had written. I stood up and looked down at him. “Shall we?” I asked. He stood up with Grace in his arms and took my hand as we strolled along the ocean. The water was unusually serene, looking more like a pond than the ocean.

  “Here?” I asked.

  “Perfect,” he responded.

  I took Jamie’s free hand and wrapped his fingers around the string of the balloon just above mine.

  “Ready?” I asked.

  He nodded.

  “Happy birthday, Charlie,” we said, simultaneously, as we loosened our grip on the string until it slid past our fingertips and slowly began to drift over the ocean. I looked into Jamie’s eyes. They were glassy, but they didn’t have the same sadness that I had been so accustomed to over the past few years. I saw happiness, the same spark that he had in those beautiful blue eyes when Charlie was still alive.

  He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close. I leaned my head into his chest as Grace happily flailed her arms and legs, letting out a loud screech of glee. We watched the balloon until it became a faint speck, blending in with the sky that was lighting up in hues of pink and peach as the sun was beginning to set.

  We had finally set the pain of Charlie’s death free, while keeping the happy memories of him alive within in our hearts; two hearts that had overcome the greatest loss in life and were beating, once again, in unison.

  Dear Charlie,

  You are our angel in heaven and the love of our lives. We know that you are spreading your wings and still putting a smile on everyone’s face, the same way you continue to put one on ours. You are alive inside of our hearts and whenever we are missing you, we know that you’re not far away. Happy birthday, and know that you will always be our shining star.

  Love you forever & always ~

  Mommy & Daddy xoxo

  Sneak Peek: A Will to Change (Will’s Story)

  Prologue

  Will

  I was twenty-one-years-old and thought I knew everything there was to know about life…until September 11, 2001. It was my second day on the job as a New York City firefighter, a day that changed me forever. It was the first time that I actually thought that my old man had been right. I should have gone to law school like my brother, instead of chasing fires and women.

  As the years passed, I tried to focus on the lives that were saved on that day and not the countless ones that were lost. So many sad and tragic stories came from that horrible event, but the one that remained with me all these years later was that of a man and his teenage daughter that Danny, another firefighter and my mentor, and I met in the stairwell on the eighteenth floor of the South Tower. He was guiding his daughter, who was trying her best to walk down the crowded stairwell with a cast on her leg. I noticed immediately that he was having a hard time breathing. The thickening smoke and smell of fumes was becoming unbearable.

  “Are you okay?” Danny asked him.

  “I can’t breathe,” he answered, gasping for air. His daughter clung tightly to his arm, not wanting to leave his side. She was trembling and sobbing uncontrollably. Danny removed his oxygen mask and put it over the man’s face to help him breathe easier.

  “Please, take my daughter and get her out of here,” the man begged.

  “Will, get her out of here,” Danny shouted. “I’m going to give him some oxygen to help him out with his breathing.”

  “No, Daddy, I'm not leaving you,” she cried, grasping onto him even tighter.

  His deep brown eyes stared into mine, pleading. At that moment, I realized that I was looking into the eyes of a man who may have been making his last request. I pried her arms from his neck while she fought me with everything she had.

  “No!” she shouted with tears rolling down her face. “I'm not leaving my father!”

  “Listen to me, Bree. Please, just go and I’ll meet you outside.” His words were barely audible through his labored breathing.

  Sh
e hugged him tightly. “I love you, Daddy. I love you more than anything.”

  “I love you, too, little bumble bee.” She kissed him softly on his cheek and loosened her grip from his neck. When she went to stand up, her one good leg gave out. She was trembling. I wrapped her arm around my neck, allowing her to bear her weight on to me. I turned around one last time, looking into her father's tear-filled eyes.

  Thank you, he mouthed to me.

  I guided her down the crowded stairwell, trying to calm her down by having a conversation with her as if everything were normal. She was seventeen, broke her leg two weeks ago when she fell from her bike, and the only reason that that she was here this morning was because she had left her homework in her dad’s office the night before. She told me all about her dog and how she just wanted to get home and give him a hug. I found that keeping her talking and diverting her attention from the chaos around her was comforting her a bit and, in a strange way, it was helping me to cope with the situation a little bit better, too. I could tell she was in pain and, somewhere around the tenth floor, I picked her up and carried her. Thirty minutes later, we finally made it outside. I put her down and wrapped her arm around my neck once again, leading her across the chaotic street and as far away from the building as possible. We walked a few blocks through the droves of people until I finally felt like she was out of harm’s way.

  “Listen to me!” I shouted as she stared blankly into space. I could tell that she was in shock and I felt bad leaving her, but I knew that there were so many others still inside that needed help. “Listen to me!” I repeated. She finally looked at me with tear-filled eyes. “I need you to try and get as far -.” A loud roar and shrill screams broke my thoughts as I looked up, not believing what I was witnessing as the entire tower came crumbling down in a matter of seconds.

  “No!” the girl screamed as she watched in horror. I pulled her to me and she buried her face in my chest. I wanted to shield her from the dust that was beginning to swallow us up and also prevent her from watching what was taking place, knowing that her dad was still inside.

  Her father and Danny never came out of that building that day and if it wasn’t for a stranger named Bree, I knew that I wouldn’t have, either. The look in her dad’s eyes would be something that would remain in my head and my heart for the rest of my life. Because of that day, I realized that life can change in an instant so you may as well enjoy it while you’re here. Those were words that I chose to live by ever since.

  ~Coming summer 2014~

  Add it to your TBR list:

  https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/20823202-a-will-to-change