“Yes, Jojo’s imagination took center stage. This is so important to the 3-D life, this factor of taking on someone else’s dreams. If you could see all the times you take someone else’s dream personally and make it seem like your own. When you do this and it isn’t really your dream you give your energy to it but you can’t change it because it isn’t yours to change. The only thing you can do is let it go.”
Amelia’s attention turned to the dream of the horny manager. “I made his dream my dream didn’t I? I took on his anxiety. That’s why we fought. We were both fighting for our own dreams to be center stage as if one dream might cancel out the other.” Tetta looked but did not answer Amelia. It was as if she was waiting for more. Amelia could tell that this was another moment when it was up to her alone to perceive what was next. She struggled to hold on to her train of thought. The train had left the station and she still wasn’t sure where it was going.
Pause, pause, pause…
Jojo slid to Tetta’s feet at the base of the rocking chair. “I’m ready to go!” The youngster was filled with more energy than his body could contain.
“Good for you! I think we should go to town and get a big stack of hotcakes and bacon to start us off right!” Tetta stood and looked at Amelia. “He’s on first, you’re on deck.”
“Where’s Miguel?” Amelia asked
“On third.” Tetta continued the ballgame analogy to decipher whose dream was where for Amelia. “He went ahead. He said he’d meet us there.” Tetta headed for the front door.
“Did you call Hiram and Johnny?” Jojo asked.
“Oh dear I almost forgot.” Tetta turned and picked up the phone receiver from the table next to the rocking chair. Amelia looked at it. With its cord that ran to the phone and the pedestal table beneath, it reminded her of the table in her dream where the horned manager had not allowed her to take a call. She glanced down at the gold lamé shoes and wondered once again about her relationship to this man, the way he needed to control her, and the possibility that she might marry someone like that. Horny manager, she thought, that seems to be a pretty good metaphor for a controlling boyfriend.
“Miss Amelia, we’re going!” Jojo shouted from the porch. Amelia jumped into action.
“I’m with you!” She joined him on the porch and pulled the door shut behind her.
The town was alive with Saturday morning business. Trucks were parked at the Hardware and Feed store loading wood and tools for weekend projects. The barbershop had a healthy crowd of men telling jokes and laughing, and Miguel was among them. The diner had a waiting line. Amelia joined the line behind Tetta while Jojo scouted out other kids with whom he could share his excitement about the circus.
Amelia watched Miguel across the street but was thinking about Hrim. If he wasn’t an elephant, what was he? She looked at Tetta. Is Hrim like you? Are you a real woman?
Tetta smiled at Amelia. You do have a lot of thoughts going on today don’t you? She reached her hand into the air and waved to Hiram and Johnny. “Hello!” The two joined them in line. “Miguel!” Tetta waved to the group across the street. “Come along, we’re going in!” Miguel waved good-bye to the other men he was speaking with, and jogged across the street.
When Amelia entered the diner she could hardly believe her eyes. It was her dream. It was the restaurant she had been in when she first realized something was wrong. Her eyes darted to the corner across the room, but the horned manager was not there. Quickly images from her very first dream sequence flew through her mind. There was no Rumba line of people with masks and capes, no Jackie Gleason type or Judy Garland whispering in her ear.
“Are you alright dear?” Tetta gently put her hand on Amelia’s forearm. Amelia barely felt it. She felt very far away from everything. How can my dream be in Jojo’s dream? she wondered.
Anyone can bring anything to the dream as long as it doesn’t cross Jojo’s boundaries, Tetta replied.
So I’m causing this? Amelia asked.
Not exactly causing it, Dear, no, but you require it.
What do you mean I require it?
There is something in this scene for you if you have eyes to see. There is something about this place that may help you remember what you need to know.
Did you make this place come back? Amelia felt angry. She wanted answers not riddles.
If I could access the information you need I would tell you outright. The opportunity came up for this place to manifest and as the scene still holds a charge for you, here we are.
What opportunity? Amelia asked simultaneously realizing it was Tetta’s request of Jojo that they eat breakfast at the Diner. You made room for this to happen then? she clarified.
Yes, but to help, not to harm. Please Amelia, don’t waste your time here being upset. See what might spark your memory instead.
Amelia considered her relationship to Tetta. She could not for the life of her understand what had drawn this woman into her life or why she should trust her at all. Yet given the situation she was in she didn’t feel she had much of a choice. She was learning from Tetta; she just hoped what the old woman was teaching was true.
Amelia shook her shoulder length curly red hair back from her face and walked to the booth with Tetta. It was a large booth that held six people. Amelia was given a spot on the outside edge. Miguel sat on the other side of Tetta from her in the same seat. Jojo was seated directly across the table from Amelia with Hiram next and Johnny seated in the corner farthest from Amelia.
Amelia looked at Johnny and then at Hiram. Something seemed to be wrong. Something about the two brothers just didn’t fit. They didn’t look alike but might when Johnny was as old as Hiram. Amelia’s eyes darted back and forth between the pair. Hiram was old enough to be Johnny’s grandfather.
“Do you two come from a large family?” Amelia asked settling her eyes on Hiram.
“Me and Johnny?” Hiram asked. “No, just the two of us.”
“Where are you from?” Amelia was proceeding with a little sleuthing.
“Small town nearby called Richmond.” Hiram’s eyes twinkled.
“Were your parents from there as well?” Amelia thought she would catch him with this one but Hiram was well aware of her thought process.
“My mother was from Fort Loramie,” Hiram responded
“And my mom was from Richmond,” Johnny jumped into the conversation.
“Same dad,” Hiram finished.
Amelia was disappointed. It was entirely possible that Johnny’s mother was far younger than Hiram’s and able to bear children long into their father’s old age. She felt a nudge from Tetta.
Move on dear, this conversation can happen anywhere. What do you remember about this place? Tetta urged.
The waiter approached the table and fixed his eyes on Amelia. “Have you come to a decision?” he asked. Amelia hadn’t even considered what she would have for breakfast. She glanced down at the menu. It was a dinner menu and a pricey one at that. No appetizer was under $20. No entrée was below $36.
“Something to drink?” the waiter asked. Amelia was dumbfounded by the selection of exotic foods on the menu. “Ma’am?”
“Water with lemon,” Amelia blurted out. The waiter departed as if there was no one else at the table. Amelia looked around. She was the only one in the booth.
Fear gripped at Amelia’s throat and chest. Suddenly she couldn’t say anything. She couldn’t swallow. She couldn’t feel her feet. She peered over her knees toward the gold lamé shoes. She felt strangely safe as long as they were on. More Dorothy in Oz, she thought.
Amelia looked around the room for anything that might serve as a clue, a connection with whatever she needed to know. Directly behind her, a couple that seemed more consistent with small town diner than upscale restaurant were holding hands across the table. At the table for two beside her booth a woman dressed in black daintily checked her Palm pilot while she waited. What she was seeing wasn’t making sense, as it hadn’t the first time she had the dream.
I’m in an expensive restaurant, Amelia reminded herself. That could be a symbol of… what?
“I’m glad you could make it.” David, sans horns, was seating himself across the booth from Amelia. His Gucci suit was creased razor sharp as if he had just put it on. Despite his improved attire compared to the mismatched shorts and sport shirt he wore at the shoe store, David remained edgy and seemed uncomfortable. “I want to apologize.”
Amelia could only imagine that their previous argument had ended in a terrible squabble. She felt her fingers wrap around something on her finger.
“I don’t want an apology David,” she found herself saying. David smiled weakly. “I don’t want dinner either.” David’s smile fell away from his face. “I only came to give you this.” Amelia locked on to the ring just below the oversized diamond. She pulled it off and held it out across the table.
“Mimi,” David’s eyes pleaded into hers, “you can’t mean this.”
“I do,” she insisted, setting the ring on the table. “I mean I can’t David. I can’t marry you.”
David looked at the ring with astonishment, as if he had just spied a cockroach in his salad. Several seconds passed by. He didn’t say or think anything Amelia could grasp.
What are you thinking? Amelia thought.
This can’t be happening! he seemed to reply.
“Why are you so surprised?” Amelia began to realize she was reliving a conversation which had already taken place. “We haven’t been getting along for months. This needed to end.”
“But Mimi,” David recited his lines, “what about all of our plans? We’ve paid for everything in full.”
“I have paid for everything in full,” Amelia corrected, and then wondered, I did?
“Well, of course you did, but it was for us!” an exasperated David insisted, and then defended, “and things are going to turn around for me you know.” He pulled nervously on the sleeves of his jacket.
“I’m sorry David. I’m leaving.” Amelia began to stand. She saw his hands shooting across the table and felt them landing on her shoulders.
“No!” He pushed and Amelia fell back on the seat. She looked around the room. It was as if no one had noticed the use of physical force. David’s face was red. “I’m afraid that’s not possible.” David stared at the table trying to compose himself, his face becoming more and more red.
“I don’t think you get to decide that for me anymore.” Amelia stood again and braced herself for some sort of resistance from David or any other person present.
“Amelia,” David leapt out of the booth and went after her as she headed for the door, “you can’t leave like this. Look at the state you’re in!” He looked at her as though she was upset.
I’m not in any state! Amelia thought. She could feel her teeth gritting together. “You really need to get some help David, and it isn’t going to come out of my purse anymore.” Amelia pushed past David and went through the door rummaging through her purse. She grabbed a ticket and held it up for the Valet.
“Thanks!” Jojo chimed as he took Dumbo’s clear container from between her fingers.
Amelia looked up incredulously. Tetta and Hiram flanked her on either side while Miguel leaned on a parking meter and conversed with Johnny a few feet away.
How did it go Amelia? Tetta’s voice sounded softly in her head.
Better than last time. Amelia shook her head. Sort of.
Jojo was on fire with anticipation. “There’s going to be amazing acrobats!” he declared, “and tremendous trainers of lions, tigers, and bears!”
“Oh my!” Amelia couldn’t resist another play on the Oz theme. She was amused at the way the story continued to play as a metaphor in the dream. As the group made their way toward the circus tents she checked her story against Dorothy’s famous adventure.
Let’s see, she thought, innocent little girl finds herself lost with her dog in a strange world filled with people, some who want to help her and some who want to hurt her. She didn’t think there was anyone in her dream who meant her any harm.
She looked at Jojo dancing in front of Hiram enumerating the descriptions of the circus entertainers listed on the commemorative poster he got at the gate.
Munchkin, Amelia thought.
“Where to first?” Miguel asked as he returned with a huge glob of cotton candy on a paper cone for Jojo. As Jojo pulled off a piece and put it in his mouth Amelia could almost see the cavities developing in his teeth. Clearly, she thought, this is totally his dream. Then she wondered at her concern for his dental health. Perhaps I’m a dentist, she wondered. Maybe that’s how I became rich enough to support a boy toy like David.
Trouble was, as far as she was concerned, David wasn’t much of a toy. She considered the possibility that maybe there had once been some level of likeable personality about him. She thought perhaps he had come upon hard times and how much it could have hurt him when she pulled out the safety net. She wondered how David figured into her being stuck in the dream state.
Amelia looked down at her feet. She couldn’t remember if she had been wearing the gold lamé shoes in her dream. How do these damn things figure in? The best guess she had on the whole scene was that she had broken up with David having finally realized how incompatible they were after a fight about shoes.
“Elephants it is!” Miguel announced as if he were Jojo’s personal commentator for the day. His interest in Jojo was budding, or Jojo was dreaming himself a veritable father figure.
“Hey Miss Amelia,” Jojo called, “we’re gonna’ go find Hrim!” Amelia smiled. She wondered if the elephant, their common denominator, might show up at the circus after all.
Pause, pause, pause…
The big top was smaller than the larger circuses Miguel had seen at the arena downtown when he was a kid. There was no tent in the big circus. Walking through the entrance with Jojo, he felt like a kid again. He felt almost compelled, as Jojo was, to run in search of a front row seat. The handbill indicated there was an elephant that could dance and another that could do headstands.
Jojo found a long bench in the stands that would seat all six in their party. “The clowns are in here, too, with the elephants, and after that comes the wild animal trainers!” Miguel laughed as Jojo could barely squeeze the words through his heavy-breathing, all-too-excited body. He looked at Tetta, Johnny, and Hiram talking quietly among themselves and felt a pang of concern cross his thoughts. Something seemed to be going on in the background beneath all of the excitement and thrills for Jojo.
Jahni noticed Miguel’s thoughts out of the corner of his mind and scanned for awareness. “He doesn’t remember going lucid last night,” Hrim confirmed. “I checked him out in the waking dream.”
“Smart,” Jahni acknowledged. “Have you locked on to the drunk in the Wait Station too?”
“He wasn’t there last night,” Hrim replied, “I could be off sequence.”
“Hard to tell when someone’s using,” Tetta agreed. “So what are we looking for here?”
“My guess is an opportunity for some heroics and perhaps a little leveling of the playing field,” Hrim offered. “I paid a visit to Jojo’s home base last night and the picture wasn’t very pretty.”
Tetta looked at the boy jumping out of his chair to check on the arrival of the elephants. He seemed so happy while at the same time finding it difficult to stay still when he was looking forward to something. “How can we help?” she asked.
“Well, Jojo is pretty talented in the dream state,” Hrim informed Jahni and Tetta. “He has already taken on his stepfather whether he appeared as a man or a tiger.”
“The boy has no fear?” Jahni asked.
“The boy has a lot of fear, and it’s affecting him pretty badly in every area of his life,” Hrim corrected. “He has difficulty in school and isn’t exactly viewed as a team player, so he doesn’t play sports or have any other outlet. When he dreams he can turn the tables and be effective over his circumstances,” Hrim ad
ded. “But when he’s awake he is more likely to hide in his room with his snail.”
“So we anticipate more heroics on his part this evening?” Jahni asked.
“Probably the boy will try to prove himself a man again.” Hrim sighed. “Unfortunately, there’s no getting through to his stepfather.”
“Well, Jojo can let off some steam trying!” Jahni offered.
“As long as no one gets hurt,” Tetta replied.
“Now, Tetta.” Hrim put his hand around her shoulder.
“I know, I know.” She squeezed his hand.
Pause, pause, pause…
Bodhisattvas are enlightened beings who choose to not cross over into Nirvana, even when they have earned the privilege. They have become so good they wish to help the rest of humanity do the same before they retire to spend eternity in bliss.
Resume, resume, resume…
Tetta was not exactly a bodhisattva, but she was also not an etheric guide. She could not shape shift the way Hrim could, yet she also didn’t return to waking life after sleeping. Tetta’s specialty was working with the Undecided, yet she leaned toward sending them back to the 3-D world whenever possible. The waiting line for re-entry was getting longer and longer. Tetta knew that those exiting the body now might need to wait millennia to reincarnate if the world didn’t drastically change in the very near future. There just wouldn’t be enough bodies for souls to get into. Of course, she knew that reincarnation was just for those who believed in it and that those who believed they would see eternal peace would feel content for many centuries of their wait.
Tetta could see that all three of the human subjects before her had come into this life on the Karma card and she longed for them to live long enough to exit the karmic dream. Nirvana, she knew, awaited anyone who could truly open himself or herself to it. The hardest part of her work was keeping to herself when her projects continued to clutch their self-limiting ideas. Amelia, Miguel, and Jojo were very open to change. Tetta just wished they knew that they were.
Gold Lame' (That's le-mayy) (Gold Lame' Series) Page 10
