My stomach flipped… Michelle. I gripped the countertop.
"Hey, Morgan. I was just—she'll be fine. She doesn't want Sean, you know. She might want him to want her, but she's never been all that interested in him. Besides, with you looking like this, she doesn't have a chance."
I tried to take deep breaths and calm down, but the closer we got to leaving, the more anxious I became. Mel helped me into my dress and shoes, and when I looked in the mirror, I just shook my head.
"Do you feel like Cinderella? Cause you sure as hell look like a princess."
I hugged Mel. I was so thankful she was helping me convince myself I could fit into all this.
"Thank you… for being here."
"You’re my sister now. I'll help you through whatever you need. It's gonna be tough, Morgan. But just talk things through with him, and call me whenever you need to. I've lived through a lot of the crap with him. He's put up some walls, but I know for a fact that you're the only girl he's been with that might actually be able to tear them down."
I believed what she said, but it felt like a lot more pressure was sitting on my shoulders to be okay with all the famous stuff. I was perfectly happy with Sean when we were alone, but everything else petrified me.
She patted my hand. "Stay here, and I'll see if he's ready."
"Can you grab me my phone? It's in my purse on the nightstand. I need to check on the inn."
She smiled and disappeared. I stared at my reflection. Hollywood—I was going to a Hollywood premiere. I certainly never thought I'd be thinking that.
My hands were shaking when Mel opened the door and handed me my cell phone. "He needs a few more minutes. I'm going to help him with his cuff links."
I nodded and was thankful for a few more minutes to myself. Turning on my cell phone, I hit my own panic button: Call Cerise.
She picked up on the second ring. "How you doing?" The worry in her voice was clear.
"Awful. My hands are shaking, and I think I might throw up. Cerise, I don't think I can do this."
"Sure you can. Take deep breaths. It's not that big a deal, Morgan. Really, aside from the guys who'll think you're hot, you won't be looked at too much. They'll be focused on Sean. You'll be fine. You're arm candy tonight. No one knows who you are. Besides, he's worth it isn't he?"
"But what if they ask me questions I don't know how to answer?"
"Then you smile and give them the sly, 'I'm not going to answer that' look like you give the old bitties who ask asinine questions."
"He says he's in love with me, Cerise. In love?"
"And that's a problem?" She laughed, but it was a gentle laugh. "Honey, you've been falling for him since the first time he made you feel that nervous excitement again. And there's nothing wrong with that."
"I don't even know this famous side of him, Cerise. How can I know if I'm falling for him or not?"
"I'm calling bullshit on that one, Morgan. There is no way in hell you would have torn out of here like you did with that hurt all across your face if you didn't already have strong feelings for him. It may be a lot to take in, but you need to stop fooling yourself. In fact, I think you're already in love with him, and you need to just admit it to yourself. Now I can't blame you for wanting to know him and his life a little more before making a commitment or even telling him how strongly you feel for him, but don't fool yourself."
There was too much fear and uncertainty standing between me and knowing my feelings for him. "I—I'm scared."
"I know. God, I know. And I don't blame you one little bit. But Morgan, face the fear, don't let it make you hide. Face it with him. He'll stand by your side. Geez, you should have seen him when he showed up here. I was so star-struck. But when Stewie got up immediately and went to him, I knew he was your Sean. And it all made sense. I couldn't believe it. Annalisa and I were completely speechless. But Morgan, he was destroyed. He was freaking out when I told him you weren't here. He's got it bad for you—seriously bad. So don't be a bitch and lead him on. If you can't love him, walk away."
"I—I just don't know. I—"
"Bullshit! If he walked out of your life tonight, how would you feel?"
I thought about that very unpleasant possibility, and my stomach lurched again. I hated the thought.
Cerise continued. "What would you do if he sent you home and told you he didn't want to see you again?"
Tears pricked my eyes. I wanted to be with him. He made me feel alive again. He made me feel like I could still have a happy relationship with a guy despite everything that had happened to me. The thought of losing him, or never being in his arms again, it felt awful. My lower lip trembled, but I kept my emotions under control. "Stop, you're gonna mess up my makeup."
"Exactly! You can't even think about it, can you?" I took in a few deep breaths as she waited for my brain to catch up to her words. "You love him. And he loves you. Stop trying to protect your heart—it's already gone, honey."
There was more to this than feelings, though. "What if I make a fool out of myself in front of all these people? I don't want to embarrass him. What if I can't fit into this world?"
"You'll be fine. You can handle yourself anywhere. These people may have money, but they're still people. They're no better than you and me. You have to remember that. They're just people. And I don't think it's possible for you to embarrass him. When he came here, I refused to tell him where you were. He begged me—literally begged me to tell him. I asked him why he thought he deserved you, and you know what he said? He said he didn't deserve you. He meant it, too. He thinks you're better than him. You can't embarrass him. You'll be great. I know it."
I let out a long breath. My hands were still shaky, but I didn't feel as panicked or sick to my stomach. She was right. I knew how to handle myself. "Thanks, Cerise."
"Anytime, now go turn some heads, and be prepared to tell me absolutely everything."
I laughed a little. "In extreme detail. Bye."
A minute later, Mel poked her head in. "I'm going downstairs. He's ready for you now."
I took a moment to calm myself down, and opened the door.
Confessions
My hands were shaking, but it was excited jitters now. I opened the door, but his back was to me. I turned out the bathroom light and stepped farther into the room. He turned around slowly, and I stopped moving. He was—indescribable. The black suit he wore made him look a little dangerous. It fit him so perfectly. The gray dress shirt brought out the gray in his eyes and contrasted nicely with the black suit and black tie. I'd seen him accept the Oscar only a year ago. I'd seen him at other awards shows on TV, but this was real. I could reach out and touch him.
When I finally got the courage to look him in the eye, I could feel my whole body blushing. That look he often got—like he wanted to devour me—was there only so much stronger than it ever had been before. I smiled a big, wide smile as he looked me up and down. He held up his finger and spun it in the air. I kept my head as high as I could and spun slowly around feeling the long layers of sheer material slide against my thighs. As I faced him again, the cool air hit my upper right thigh, and I knew the slit there was exposing my leg. His eyes focused there for several moments.
He shook his head with the most amazed expression. "You—" His voice was high, and he had to clear his throat. "You look—I don't have any words, Morgan. How am I supposed to keep every man from drooling over you tonight?"
I rolled my eyes but was so incredibly flattered—more by the way he looked at me than by his words, but that was immaterial.
He stepped toward me, and I noticed a small velvet box in his hand. "A few weeks ago, someone broke into my hotel room in Miami and stole several items. One of them was a watch. It wasn't a big deal—I went out and bought another one. But when I was in the jewelry store, I saw these and just—I had to buy them for you." He opened the box a little, but then stopped and put his hand over it. "You agreed I could buy you gifts, remember?"
I nodded, feeling m
ore anxious, but he put me at ease with his affectionate smile. He opened the box, and I nearly fainted. Inside were two sparkling diamond earrings. So many diamonds were clustered together to form hanging flowers dangling down from a flower shaped cluster on the stud that it was overwhelming. They were too much. I couldn't possibly wear them. I shook my head at him, wide-eyed and started backing away from him.
He put his hand out and grabbed onto my arm. "Morgan," he warned. "This is nothing, love. This is the equivalent of you going out to some store in the mall and buying some fake jewelry. Remember, I'm not normal. I'm not just some guy who bought you an extravagant gift to show off. This isn't a big deal in my world. In fact, it's rather modest."
"Not to me!" My voice was so high and squeaky, but he held tight to my arm.
"I know, sweetie, but we're not in your world tonight, we're in mine. And in my world, this is what my girlfriend wears. So make a choice. You look every bit the part of my girlfriend—I'd like to finish it off with these. You don't have to wear them to work at the inn." I laughed a high pitched, nervous giggle, and he smirked at me. "But we're not at the inn tonight, love. Please accept them. They were made for you." My hand shook as I reached out and touched them. I finally nodded, and it was all the encouragement he needed.
"They're actually antiques. They're from the late 1800s—the Victorian era—like your inn." He pulled the earrings from the box. "After I bought them, I was worried because I didn't even know if you had pierced ears." He held them out to me, and I had to stand in front of the mirror to put them on.
"Isn't this a little much for a premiere? I've seen some pictures of really casual premieres."
"We're supposed to play up the glamorous Hollywood thing tonight. Everyone in on the movie will be decked out." My hands were shaking so badly that Sean had to help me put the earrings in. "I know you're nervous, but I need you to try to calm down. I can't take you like this." He took my hands in his, and stared at my reflection in the mirror. "I'll worry about you all night long."
He turned me around so I was facing him and kissed me softly. It only took a second for the kiss to spin out of control, making me tremble for an entirely different reason. When he pulled back though, I felt a little stronger.
"Sean, it's time to go. We can't wait any longer." Stewie's voice broke into our little bubble of tension.
I stared down at my hands and drew in a shaky breath. He kissed my left hand and stared down at it for a moment with the oddest expression before pulling me toward the door.
Mel was ecstatic to see us together and took several pictures. Rudy and Nathan were all smiles in their black suits and black dress shirts. Stewie looked great in a charcoal suit with a baby blue dress shirt, and I noticed all three of them had earpieces in their ears.
Sean stopped in front of Nathan. "As you can see, you're incredibly necessary this evening. She doesn't leave your sight for a damn second. No one touches her."
"Not gonna be easy, Sean, but you know me."
"I know. You can be an intimidating ass when you want to be." He smacked him on the back. "Be that full force tonight, Nathan. Seriously—no quiet bullshit tonight."
"I got my A game tonight, boss. You know I won't let anything happen to her."
He nodded and seemed satisfied. Sean turned back to me, whispering in my ear. "Mel asked me if she can come spend some time with us in Vermont. Your blinding beauty distracted me from asking you upstairs."
"Of course." I was happy she wanted to spend more time with me and even happier that he was coming back to me.
Sean hugged Mel. "We'll see you in Vermont. Go home and pack some warm clothes. Stewie can get you a flight." Her smile was huge, making me feel so much better about Sean's family. "Tell Mom I was serious, and tell Dad I'll call him later in the week."
"Got it," she said as she hugged me and then Sean.
He kissed my hand and pulled me toward the garage. "Well, beautiful, let's go to a premiere."
In the car, Sean spent several minutes smiling mischievously at me while he tried to rearrange the fabric of my dress to where it wasn't exposing my legs. It made me laugh because there was absolutely no way to accomplish it, and the way his hands were purposefully caressing my legs made me wish to be alone with him in the limo.
Stewie finally got annoyed. "For crying out loud, Sean, cut it out. She's not naked."
Sean glared at me, but his dimples were so deep with the smile he was trying to hold back that I knew he was teasing me. He put his arm on the seat behind me and kissed my cheek. "You're too sexy for your own damn good."
Sean and Stewie spent at least twenty minutes talking about the contract he had looked over earlier. With the movement of the car and the scenery out the window, my nerves calmed down. Sean moved his arm from the back of my seat to my exposed thigh making me squirm a little. Just when I was feeling pretty at ease, Stewie leaned forward and Sean squeezed my thigh to alert me.
"Okay, Morgan," Stewie said, and I straightened up a bit. "Here's how this is gonna look. You and I are going to walk down the red carpet with Nathan. I'll get you to the end of the carpet away from the photographer mess. They'll take your picture, but won't know who you are. Nathan will stand with you along with Chrissy, one of our handlers for the premiere. I'll head back down the carpet and rejoin Sean who has to take the long walk, greeting and interviewing, and signing with Rudy, the rest of the security team, and the other handlers. Stay with Chrissy. Nathan knows her, so follow Nathan." I nodded as he went on. "When Sean reaches you, we'll head inside and watch the movie. Afterward, we'll all head to the after-party." I tried not to show any outward reaction. Stewie was watching me closely. Sean squeezed my thigh again, but wasn't watching me. "Good." Stewie nodded at me. "Keep that up tonight, Morgan."
"Stewie," Sean warned. "Don't."
Stewie groaned loudly and sat back in his seat. Several minutes later, we were slowing, but my heartbeat was accelerating. The limo seemed to stop and go a hundred times before Sean turned to me and kissed me again. His kiss became more urgent—like he was trying to put all the emotion between us into it. His hand moved back to my thigh, but the car moved again and stopped.
"We're next." Sean pulled back as Stewie continued. "Sean, stay in the car until the rest of the team gets here."
He kept his eyes on mine. "Just remember. What I do on the carpet is for the cameras, love. It's not real. You and me—we're real."
I nodded and told myself to commit his words to memory. I wanted to say something to him, something that would make him smile, something to reassure him that I could handle it all. I leaned closer to him and whispered, "You know how I said if you touched me one more time I wouldn't be able to walk?" At his nod, I kissed his neck sweetly. "Well, back home in Vermont, I can't think of a reason why I'd have to do much walking."
His smile wasn't wide, but it was incredibly sexy and masculine. His eyes were sparkling with mischief. "You might regret telling me that when I refuse to let you out of bed." The car moved and pulled to a stop.
"Morgan?" Stewie said gently.
I pressed my lips to Sean's once more and turned to Stewie. He climbed out of the car and took my hand to help me out.
I was completely unprepared for the crowds. There were bleachers set up full of fans screaming. There were several stars on the red carpet giving interviews and people in black suits everywhere. Opposite the wall of interviewers was a long wall with the Until Tomorrow movie logo all over it. The movie poster was huge and displayed in the center of the red carpet with a massive picture of Michelle in Sean's arms—that was a little tough to see.
Stewie kept his arm looped through mine with his badge hanging from his neck, and I could feel Nathan right behind me. No one stopped us, and Stewie kept me walking quickly, but not too fast for my heels. When we got close to the end of the pathway, he patted my hand and leaned close to my ear. "You're doing really great, Morgan. Just try to keep the emotion off your face. It's gonna be tough to see some of this. They
'll want them posing together. Get Nathan to watch for you and tell you when not to look." I nodded.
We reached the end, and a tall blonde stepped forward. "Stewart!" She hugged him and smiled. Just then, the crowd went insane. There was screaming everywhere, and I couldn't hear anything. The blonde touched her ear where I noticed a wire extended down her neck. "Sean just took the carpet."
Stewie nodded. "This is Morgan. She's very important. You know Nathan. He's watching Morgan tonight." The blonde's eyebrows lifted a bit. Stewie turned to me. "This is Chrissy. Nathan has a radio to me and Rudy. If you need me, you tell Nathan to call for me."
I nodded and Chrissy smiled at me, extending her hand. She pulled me off to the side a bit, but where I could still see the carpet. The noise was so loud I grabbed Nathan's hand. He didn't acknowledge it outwardly, but gave my hand a little squeeze.
It was nerve-wracking to say the least. Stars I'd only ever seen on TV and movies walked by in gorgeous gowns and handsome suits. Just as Sean had said they would, everyone had their finest clothes on. It was like an awards show.
We stood there for at least ten minutes when the screaming started in again. Chrissy turned to me. "Michelle Stevens just arrived."
I nodded and felt my stomach plummet. I don't know how much time passed, but I was becoming a mess standing there waiting, unable to see what was going on around the bend.
Finally, Stewie turned the corner, and I could see Sean beside him. I was able to breathe again. He was smiling for the cameras with the same brilliant smile I'd seen on magazine covers. He gave interview after interview, waved to the crowds, and looked like he was shouting out to them at times, but I couldn't hear over the crazy cheers and people yelling "We love you, Sean!"
I was watching Sean so closely that I caught his eye travel up the carpet to meet mine. My heart swelled, and I moved forward a little, unintentionally exposing my leg to him. I could barely see him lift his eyebrow seductively at me before being pulled by Stewie to another interviewer.
Accidental Texting: Finding Love despite the Spotlight Page 22
