by Pamela Ann
“Do I look like I’m fighting it anymore?” His voice came out raspy, sounding like he was trying hard to control something. “I came here tonight knowing you were asleep, and I simply wanted to see if you’d settled in okay. However, the moment I walked into the room, I somehow ended up studying you like I used to for twenty minutes until you awoke. I want to lose myself in you, Ava.”
This could get very tricky. I had to do this right. I had to stand my ground, even if it was killing me inside, because there was this huge part of me that wanted to reach him—not just on a physical level, but deep within. Maybe his heart was unavailable, but maybe, just maybe, I could reach deep down and somehow make him want me, need me in a sense that he couldn’t survive without me.
“If I let you, you have to promise me one thing.”
“Go on,” he urged, frowning down at me.
All right. I could very well do this. It was all or nothing. “Whoever you’re doing now, anything pertaining physical contact must cease. This is the only way I’ll let you have me.” I wanted to feel embarrassed to demand such a thing to him, yet if I let him have his way and he still carried on with his activities with other women, then there was no point in any of this. I wanted him—there was no doubt of that—but he had to live by his rules, as well. If he wanted me badly, then he, too, should pay the price.
His eyes penetrated into mine, letting me know he was weighing things as he stared at me, pinning me into stillness before conveying his thoughts. “If I agree to this, you have to promise me that you won’t ever dare deny me your body, whenever, wherever. Even when you’re angry or loathing me on sight, you’ll spread your legs, welcome my cock, and let me have your sweetness for as long as I want.”
He wanted me that much? Bloody Hell.
“Any time of the day?” My body shivered at the images that appeared in my mind—him plunging into me, demanding I give him everything he wanted. Fuck. Why did this arouse me so?
“Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime,” he stated succinctly. “If I want it in the morning, I’ll have you without protest. If I want your cunt for dinner, you’ll spread these lovely legs apart and let me do all the dirty things I’ve wanted to do to you since you teased me by letting me finger your sweet cunt that night at the lake. I don’t want you to think about another man while I’m fucking you, either. In fact, I forbid you to think about anyone. I want you to focus on me—me and me alone. I’m a selfish bastard, and I don’t bloody give a fuck, because I want what I want. I’ve endured years of dreaming you were mine, writhing and moaning while I took liberties with your body.” He then paused, seeming like he had just delivered the most grueling speech of his life. “Can you handle me this way, Ava?”
My word … I was rendered speechless. Had it been Ashton who had spoken such filth, I might’ve slapped him. However, this was Reiss, and in such a twisted way, I found his filthy, cursing mouth … poetic.
“Why ask when you already know the answer to this question?”
His hard cock pressed against my stomach while his nose rested against the side of me head, breathing in the scent of my hair. “I want to hear you say the words.”
“I will handle you this way because I want you,” I passionately vowed with my entirety. “You’re the only man I’ll always want. From the beginning until the end, it’s always going to be you, Reiss.”
“Fuck,” he groaned before I felt his hands cup my face, and then I felt his lips gently, slowly kissing me. It was incredibly slow and sweet, as though he was making love to my lips with caring devotion. “You don’t know how much this kills me to say it, but I feel like I have to show some restraint since you’re my new bride and all. Besides, I don’t want to scare you away.” He smirked, making this sexy face that made my heart palpitate madly.
“Never mind my hard cock, sweet wife, but would you let me indulge you in a late night meal? Since I couldn’t deliver on my promise, I took an off chance and swung by my favorite Chinese restaurant. I hope you don’t mind take away, but if you must know, my cooking might leave you constipated, so I hardly thought it would be the best way to entice you for a good shagging marathon.”
I guffawed at his mild attempt at humor. “God, how I fucking adore you.” I kissed him one more time before my stomach made a loud, growling protest.
“Time to feed you and our baby, I see.”
It was the first time he had addressed the baby as ours instead of my child or simply addressing it as such—the baby. Call me naïve, call me gullible, but I couldn’t help it, I fell in love with him all over again.
Dinner became a feast. Well, with me naked atop the living room coffee table and him feasting on me while he teased me before feeding me. He gave the food to me in small servings. All the while, the wicked devil made sure he tortured my body enough to drive me insane with need.
I hadn’t had this much fun since … well, since him. He and I used to drive each other mad, testing each other’s limit until one of us begged for mercy. Back in the day, it had usually been him surrendering to me, but tonight, it was I who was the greedy one because I couldn’t get enough of him and his laughter. Seeing him smiling made me happy. It was infectious.
“More,” I mumbled before opening my mouth, wanting more of the shrimp he had in between his chopsticks.
“Tell me something, then I’ll feed you.” His mouth lowered to softly suckle on my breast, making me slightly open my legs, wanting, needing more of him.
“Reiss,” I moaned as I slowly rocked the table.
He groaned in frustration, breaking away from my breast before he eyed me with suspicion. “I’m not going to let you win. Tell me something first, then I’ll reward you.”
“Like what?”
He shrugged, grinning from ear to ear. “Anything you like.”
“Hmmm,” I said aloud before something clicked in my head. “Well, I’m not sure if you’re interested to know, but I’m still flexible.” When I saw his eyes darken with desire, I wanted to push him a little bit more.
Slowly getting up from the table, I heard him hiss as I was about to do something that used to drive him mad.
“Don’t—” he warned, getting up from the carpeted floor before I felt his arms circle my hips. He dragged me away, bringing me down with him with my back on the carpet. “Don’t do that,” he murmured.
“Why not?” I teased. “You used to love that…”
“Don’t get me wrong, I still do, but I don’t want to go harsh on you tonight. I want to savor you slowly…” His head went towards my abdomen, marking a kiss on the tiny bump that could barely be noticed unless you really stared at it hard.
“Did I ever tell you how beautiful you look, especially pregnant? Your cheeks are always flushed, and your eyes have light behind them. You glow.” He kissed the other side of my hips, trailing kisses around the area. “I love seeing the gradual transformation of your body ripening before me.”
Bringing his head above mine, his eyes softened while he watched me closely. “I don’t think I have said thank you. Thank you for this present. At first, I was panicked, but the more I get used to the idea, the more I see how much I actually want to be a father. It still terrifies the bonkers out of me, yet there’s excitement with it now. So, thank you for giving me one of the greatest gifts a man could ever wish for.”
“Do you mean that?” I choked back, forcing myself not to cry.
“Yes … I do … more than you’ll ever understand.”
A tear slipped away, and his thumb immediately went to catch it. “You didn’t have to tell me this, but you must know how much I appreciate that you did. There are times when I’ve thought you might hate me for it … so hearing you say otherwise just took a hefty load of guilt off my heart.”
Chapter 26
Reiss
“What?” she asked after a while of me gazing at her with what must have been an odd expression on my face.
I quickly shook my head and murmured, “Nothing … nothing at all.”
It wasn’t as if I wanted to convey what was going on in my head. She simply looked beautiful tonight, and I couldn’t take my eyes away from her. I couldn’t do it in the past, and it certainly seemed like I couldn’t do it years later. Even more so with her pregnant.
There was something volatile inside of me that made me feel entirely possessive at the thought of her carrying my child. I wanted to hide her away so no man would dare look at her and see what saw. I hadn’t planned for any of this to happen, yet here I was, staring at the very woman who had ruined me, marred me so deeply inside I thought I couldn’t ever recover from the slashing pain.
My cock was in monumental pain, although I was still fighting this consuming need to give in and have her—, all of her, tonight. There was a part of me that knew things would shift. Be it for the worse or for the better, I knew it wouldn’t be something I could undo. My actions from here on out would carry vast consequences, burdened by marriage, and I was having a difficult time letting things go, letting the past take a back seat while I figured out what would be the best course to take from here.
When she had said she loved me, all I wanted to say was, “Bollocks. You haven’t got a clue what love is.” But then, as I looked into her eyes, I didn’t have the heart to argue with her on the subject; thus I stayed mum. Besides, as far as I was concerned, it was best we didn’t discuss anything that had the word love attached to it. I’d rather take my own life than fall in love with her again. She had repeatedly proven to me how unworthy she was of my love, and with that poisonous emotion out of my system, there was no way I’d let it root inside again.
It had been fanciful of me, though, to believe I wouldn’t be tempted to want her. Whenever she was around, my cock would spring to life, and it usually took everything in me to control those urges. Those urges that almost felt too violent to manage. If I could let this hatred go, even for a night with her, it would truly be liberating. However, I was man enough to know I might not be able to handle it. Because, the truth was, I was petrified of Ava and the kind of influence she wielded over me. Like a loaded gun, she had the capability of wounding me, dismantling my very essence, leaving me in scattered pieces.
What man would gamble that kind of tragedy after they’d learned their lesson? Apparently, not I. I was confident enough to think I’d eventually get close to her while remaining devoid of emotional connection. It would take time and practiced patience, but eventually, I’d get there. I always did accomplish my goals once I put my energy into focus.
“What are you frowning about?” She batted her long lashes at me with her tantalizing eyes that were looking more violet than blue as she gazed serenely in my direction.
We were still splayed on the rug in the living room with Ava fully naked while I was still clothed. Thoughts of food had been abandoned ten minutes ago since this wicked woman had decided to taunt me, and she knew exactly how.
“You. It’s you I’m frowning about.” My answer came fluidly out of my mouth, and I noted how she immediately stiffened.
She nudged forward. “And? Aren’t you going to tell me?”
There were a lot of things that troubled me, and I wasn’t sure which one I should start with, but I somehow ended up saying, “When did you realize that you made the wrong choice in choosing him over me?”
Her lips parted, seeming to have difficulty forming the words to answer my question. Licking her lips, she curled the hair that was tucked neatly behind her ear around her finger. “When you left, I felt the hurt, but it wasn’t until after the news broke that you had died that I truly felt the full impact of losing you.”
How tricky her answer was. “So, when I left you in the library, what did you do next?”
“I … uh … went back to my friends.” She sulked. “You’re going to hold that against me, aren’t you?”
I held her accountable for a lot of things.
“I’m trying to understand what happened before, but there wasn’t much in there to glean that I haven’t known all along.”
“There you go again—always ready to shut me out. I get it. I was a terrible, rotten to the core, young girl, and I deserved to be crucified, but haven’t I suffered enough?” Her lips wobbled as she spoke, trying to hold her tears at bay. “I fucking love you, and I see through you—it’s obvious you don’t believe me. But give me a chance to prove you wrong. I’ve changed. I’ve given up everything to follow your whims. When you treat me like I’m nothing except a body to play with, even after all the anguish, I still make excuses for you. You punish me, and I’m letting you”—she sobbed softly—“because I’m still hopeful … because, even after all of this, I still believe there’s a part of you that remains mine, no matter how much you claimed to have fallen for someone else. I don’t care—I’m here, still trying to prove you wrong, even if it’s killing me inside.”
God, I hated seeing her cry. It played havoc with my emotions. I begrudged the fact that it seemed to be working in her favor once more.
“Ava, please, there’s no need for tears.”
She hid her face, trying to control her sobs. “I caaan’t…” She hiccupped. “I can’t seem to stop crying.”
I pulled her towards me, placing her head against my chest as I stroked her hair. “Hey, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”
I was a bastard. What had I been thinking? She was probably exhausted and stressed out, not to mention that she was in a new house, pregnant, and very hormonal.
“Ava …” I let out a breath, holding her close, feeling as if the world somehow disappeared, and the only thing I could see, feel, and touch was her. Each time she sniffed, I felt like even more of a heel. “I’m sorry for doing this to you. Had I known you’d end up in tears … I’m sorry; I truly am.” I couldn’t even remember when the last time I had said I was sorry to anyone was, but right that instant, I felt compelled to, because her ceaseless cries were tearing something inside me, making me hurt merely by listening to it.
Ava wedged away just enough to look me in the eye, appearing like I had robbed her of her world. “It’s how you feel, and you’re entitled to it. Don’t say sorry if you don’t mean it. It makes the whole thing much worse.”
Her cheeks had splotches of red on them, her button nose was pink from sniffing, her lips were swollen from biting her lip in the attempt to stop the sounds of her sobs, and her eyes were glassy from tears. I swallowed the dryness behind my throat as I stared at her. She looked downright distraught, yet all I could think at this very moment was how innocent and gullible she looked; it was borderline angelic.
This face had haunted me for years without letting up. With one look at her, I seemed to have gotten lost again. She was the woman I had fallen so hard for, vowing I would love her until my last breath. She had been it—the be all, end all for me.
Taking her in, I let my mind and emotions take over, and before I knew it, my hand had snuck behind her nape, pulling her towards me as I situated her so she was straddling me. Then, I sealed my lips with hers, savoring her passion and her declared love for me. I grunted her name, letting myself go as I engaged with her on all levels, readying to climb the peaks with her.
Cupping her silky bottom, I gripped it hard as I slightly parted the perfect globes, needing more intimate access to her sensitive areas. She moaned, giving in without thought as my trouser-covered, hard cock pressed against her wanton cunt. I could feel the heat emanating from it, and my mouth salivated at the thought of its wetness, dripping slowly, effortlessly, naturally lubricating itself for mating.
She arched forward and rocked across my hardness as she avariciously took pleasure from it. Palming her breasts, I pressed them together. I then stuck out my tongue and lavished on both of her pebbled nipples as I hungrily worshipped the woman who was setting my cock—my entire existence—on fire. She ravaged the very essence of my soul until I was bare and unprotected from the rabid hunger and the volatile emotions that instantaneously possessed me. I felt it all. The fire kept burning, fueling the
unquenchable hunger that kept wanting more of everything—anything—Ava could offer.
I could literally taste my surrender on my tongue as I kissed her thoroughly. Desperately. I parted from her swollen lips before letting my head fall back against the seat cushion. I lifted her up, making her gasp in shock. My ravenous appetite was at its tipping point; my tongue could almost taste her delectable pussy.
“Go on. Sit on my mouth, love. Ride me with everything you’ve got, babe.”
She looked skeptical. “But I—”
“Ride. My. Mouth. Trust me, you’re going to love it. You were adventurous once—now’s the time to unleash that dirty side of you once more. Give me the best you can do.”
Her face lit up before she slowly moved, kneeling in the middle of the sofa. She gradually reclined back, tilting slowly until her pussy locked on my lips as I rested my head back on the couch. She wiggled her hips, trying it out before she let out a pleasurable sound.
“Fuck …” she hissed before she angled a tad forward to hold onto the back of the sofa. As she rode my face, her sweet juices endlessly flowed. She took control and let herself loose, as if depraved of pleasure for too long. Throwing her head back, she bit her lip as she screamed as hard as she could, giving me the best she could offer as my tongue lapped up her honeyed cream.
Panting heavily, she seemed out of it before I gave her delicious bottom a good spank, and then I lifted her up so I could position myself behind her. She didn’t move an inch; her legs were still parted, hands gripping the end of the sofa.
Regulating my breathing, I gripped my cock with my left hand and pumped it a few times as my eyes gravitated towards her parted arse and swollen cunt lips.
“Bloody fuck, I’m going to own your body tonight, sweet wife.” Moving forward, my cock perfectly angled towards her opening. Resting half of my rigid length against her hot core, I let out an animalistic sound before my hand reached around her neck, arching her forward against my body while her bottom stayed in place. “How long do you want me to worship your impoverished pussy, love?”
