We held hands and went strolling along a dark path alongside the lake, watching the moonlight shimmering in the water, then turning our heads to see for the first time the startling beauty of our golden willow. We went up close to it, breathless, and I parted its drooping branches and we went inside. It was like walking into a cathedral, with its immense height and deep silence. In the distance, faintly, we could hear the music of the band playing, and I put my arms around Ruby and we sank down to a bed of moss and rotted leaves that gave off a rich loamy smell of earth, and we lay there for a long time in each other's arms, closer with our love than we had ever been before.
Golden willows would always bring that beautiful moment back to us, and the one we planted in our garden at the back of the house did for many years. Its loss was a tragedy to us, and while I made a mistake when I talked Ruby out of planting another one, I am glad now that I came to the realization that even if we could not see it, others could, and it would be as beautiful and as meaningful to them as it had been to us.
I go often to the little memorial park that I have created. I can make it easily with my walker, and I sit on the bench and rest and look at my trees: the big one that is for our friends, the little growing one that is for Ruby and me.
There is one more touch that I have added to make it all complete. This is a bronze plaque that I had made for the bench. It has the names of Ruby and myself inscribed on it, and underneath are the words that express my feelings about Ruby and our life together. They come from the immortal Helen Keller, who more than anyone knew the true meaning of love.
What we once enjoyed and deeply loved,
we can never lose,
for all that we love deeply becomes part of us.
Acknowledgments
I am deeply indebted to a number of people for the help they gave me in making this book possible. To my editor, Jill Schwartzman, for her valuable suggestions, and to her predecessor, Robin Rolewicz, whose enthusiasm in the initial stages of the book gave me the validation I needed. To my daughter Adraenne for her apt criticisms and especially suggesting a new and more appropriate title for the book. To my son Charles for his watchdog attitude over my welfare. To my agent Dan Lazar and to the Guggenheim Fellowship for their support, which was so greatly needed. And to the many readers of my books who have written me and have asked for this one.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Ninety-nine-year-old HARRY BERNSTEIN immigrated to the United States with his family after World War I. He is the author of The Invisible Wall and The Dream and has been published in “My Turn” in Newsweek. Bernstein lives in Brick, New Jersey, where he is working on another book.
This is a work of nonfiction. Some names and certain
identifying details have been changed.
Copyright © 2009 by Harry Bernstein
All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by Ballantine Books,
an imprint of The Random House Publishing Group,
a division of Random House, Inc., New York.
BALLANTINE and colophon are registered trademarks
of Random House, Inc.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Bernstein, Harry.
The golden willow: the story of a lifetime of love / Harry Bernstein.
p. cm.
eISBN: 978-0-345-51526-1
1. Bernstein, Harry, 1910- 2. Bernstein, Harry, 1910—Marriage.
3. Authors, American—20th century—Biography. 4. Jews—United
States—Biography. I. Title.
PS3552.E7345Z46 2009
818′.54—dc22
[B] 2009002146
www.ballantinebooks.com
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