by Simone Elise
Then as quickly as I had entered the state, I was pulled out.
“ALLIE!” Zane thumped on the door. “Are you ok?”
“I have to go,” I muttered into the phone and hung up, and, as I did, Zane twisted the doorknob and let himself in.
His eyes flashed around the room and then landed on me. “Who was that on the phone?”
“No one.”
“Don’t lie, Allie. You went to great lengths to try and block the conversation from me.” Zane turned off the shower and bath taps.
My brain was ticking at half speed. Only two words kept running through it and those words being ‘Jace’ and ‘brother.'
“Allie?” Zane’s voice rose in frustration. “Would you answer me?”
In a numbed state, I slowly shook my head. “I told you it was no one.”
He looked as if he was getting angrier by the moment, and really, what right did he have to get mad? I hadn’t asked him who he was messaging.
“Look, Zane.” I paused in the doorway. “I need some space, ok, just leave me alone for a bit.”
Realization took over Zane’s face when he finally got that I was upset. He gave me a small nod, but I could still see the unvoiced questions in his eyes.
I managed to make my way back to my bed, and this time when I curled up to go to sleep, it wasn’t Zane keeping my mind awake.
***
“Want to tell me what the problem is?” Zane arched an eyebrow at me from across the table. “Or do you want to keep taking it out on your eggs?”
I had attempted to keep my behavior in check, and not let on that I was having a mental breakdown, but like most things, I failed.
“I told you. I’m fine.”
“No, you said you didn’t want to talk about it.”
“Same thing, isn’t it?”
Zane wouldn’t understand; heck, he wouldn’t even believe me. I didn’t even really believe it myself. I hadn’t let Jace keep explaining on the phone. I didn’t want to face it as a real problem so I chose to act like it just didn’t happen.
Like I said, I was trying and failing.
“Who called you last night?” Zane took a sip of his water. “And don’t give me that line ‘it’s none of your business’ again.”
“It is none of your business.”
“Allie.” He placed his fork down, and his face turned serious. “We’re on a breakfast date, so you could at least try and make conversation with me.”
“You’re choosing subjects I don’t want to talk about.” That and I was being stubborn. “Ask me how the weather is, and I’ll be sure to give you a detailed answer.”
Zane referring to this as a breakfast date nearly had me choking on my toast. In fact, any word with ‘dating’ and ‘Zane’ in the same sentence caused the gag reflex.
“You’re mental, you know that?”
“And you wanted to be on a breakfast date with me,” I snickered back at him.
My phone once again buzzed in my pocket, and now that I had memorized Jace’s number, I blocked the call immediately.
“You got a stalker?” Zane, of course, hadn’t missed the interchange.
“Yes, I do.” I placed the phone beside me. “I’m looking at him right now.”
His expression dried. “Real mature, Allie.”
“I thought so.” I gave him a wide smile.
I hated to admit it, but I knew I had to see Jace, but I wasn’t meeting him with Zane as my shadow which meant only one thing, I had to lose Zane.
Seeing as he was physically fitter than me, I knew out-running him wasn’t going to happen which only meant one thing; I was going to have to annoy him to the break of insanity or trick him.
I thought I might as well start with breaking his sanity, as, after all, that would be more amusing.
Chapter Thirty-three
“I hate school.” I looked at the high school building with dread. “A whole day stuck here with a bunch of losers.”
“You hate everything.” Zane locked the car and walked beside me. “And you’re the only loser in this place.”
I gave him a dry expression, since when did he get a sense of humor. “Great come back.”
“I thought so.”
I sighed and adjusted the bag on my shoulder. At the very least I knew I wouldn’t be here all day. I was planning on ditching third and fourth period to go meet Jace.
The whole thought of meeting him twisted me up inside.
“I’ll meet you in English,” Zane said before taking off in another direction. For a moment I thought he was joking, and when he didn’t turn back around, I honestly thought my luck couldn’t be this good.
Maybe I didn’t even have to do the first two periods.
I quickened my pace up and headed towards the office, and when I knew I was definitely out of Zane’s sight, I broke into a run across the yard. I had money in my wallet, and the bus stop was only up the road.
All I needed to do was let Jace know the change of time.
I slowed my pace down to a nice walk and pulled out my phone. Dialing his number, I hoped he hadn’t had morning plans.
***
“I don’t believe you.” I crossed my arms, not buying a word he said. “Jace, you can’t expect me to just believe what you are saying, as you have no proof and I’m pretty sure mom would have mentioned I had a brother.”
“Did mom ever tell you dad was still alive?” Jace shot back at me, “Come on, Allie, it makes sense, and if you don’t see it, then you are in denial.”
Denial.
Maybe.
But coming to terms with your dad being still alive, and you have a brother that you knew nothing about is a lot to take in. Plus, it means my mother has been lying to me this whole time.
“Why did dad leave?” I stared down at my untouched coffee cup. “You said he is still close, but why? Why stay if he wanted to leave so badly?”
“Mom wanted the safety of a pack. Dad is against what a pack stands for.” A grim smile crossed Jace’s face. “He got me, and mom got you.”
“Why don’t I remember you?”
“You were young, Allie.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t take it personally. What matters is what happens now, and that’s why I clicked the bracelet on you.”
“Yeah, thanks for that.” I rolled my eyes, glancing down at the thing. “You have no idea how much trouble this thing has caused. I’ve got my own security guard thanks to it.”
“Yeah. Zane Harris.” He cocked his head to the side. “Anything you want to tell me, Allie?”
Hell no. He doesn’t get that right.
“I don’t want to tell you anything.” I leaned across the table lowering my voice. “Don’t get confused, Jace. Just because I am sitting here doesn’t mean I want to get to know you. I’m here because I had questions, that’s it. Now I have the answers. I don’t think I want to know anything else.”
His hand clamped down on mine. “But you don’t know everything yet.”
“I don’t want to know.”
“You don’t want to know how your mom is lying to you! Forcing you to be the wife of the future Alpha. Everything dad stands against!”
I pointed a finger at him, feeling an uncontrollable rage consume me. “Mom might be lying to me, but she isn’t forcing me to marry anyone. What happens between Zane and me is no one else’s business.”
He shook his head, with a determining smirk on his face. “What happens between you and Zane will be determined by this. If you don’t see that, you’re as blind as our mom.”
“You should go.”
“Yeah, maybe I should.”
“And before you do, take this off.” I held my wrist out. “My mind doesn’t need to be hidden. I have nothing to hide, and maybe this whole hiding my thoughts and scent has more to do with your safety than mine.”
“Fine.” Jace unclipped the bracelet - seems he had the magic touch. “But when t
hings turn to shit, don’t say I didn’t tell you.” He then slapped a piece of paper down in front of me. “You might want nothing to do with us, but dad wants you to have this. Bye, Allie.”
He slid out of the booth and left me sitting there. I was happy he was gone, but I was furious that he had distorted everything I believed to be true.
Pulling out my phone, I wasn’t surprised to see multiple missed calls from Zane.
I supposed I better ease his worry so he could lecture me. I didn’t know what scared me more, facing my mom about this or knowing that now Zane knows everything.
***
I had always envied the lives of fictional characters. They were always so alluring and filled with thrilling moments; unlike mine. Well, that was until now.
I sat frozen on my mom's couch. Was it stupid of me to hope that everything Jace told me was a lie?
The sad part was it wasn’t, and sadder yet was that he didn’t even scratch the surface of what was kept from me.
I hadn’t told mom what Jace had told me, and she must have thought that he had told me a lot more than he had because once she started, she just didn’t stop.
Mom left dad after she found out he was part of a movement whose sole purpose was to dissolve packs and get rid of the whole ‘Alpha’ concept.
Mom loved the safety of a pack life. It made sense because she was the daughter of an Alpha, and she had mated with a male she thought would be a powerful Alpha.
But dad had other plans.
She said it was easier to pretend he was dead than keep living knowing he was alive.
She thought I would cope better with a memory of a loving dad than a memory of a dad she ripped me from.
“Allie, you have to understand something.” She placed a hand on my knee, causing me to break from my thoughts. “You can’t tell anyone about this.”
I scoffed, “How am I to manage that? Zane is in my head most of the time, so it wouldn’t surprise me if he already knew.”
“He can’t know, Allie. You have to understand it is highly important they never find out.”
“Why? Why does it matter if he knows my family is screwed up?” I didn’t see Zane as the judging type.
“If they know, Allie, they won’t have anything to do with us. The Movement is a deadly subject, one connection could have us thrown out.”
I hadn’t forgiven her, but I was glad she was honest with me. “I can’t keep this from Zane, Mom. I don’t have great control over my mind like you must.”
She had kept it a secret this long. I didn’t know how she had done it, but she had because the pack knew nothing.
“It’s not control, darling. It’s a lock.”
“What, like the bracelet?”
“Sort of. We can lock a memory, stopping others from reading it or finding it. I’ll teach you how to do it.”
“What if Zane already knows? I haven’t been wearing the bracelet all day.”
“Have you been around him?”
“No, not yet.”
“Then there is a chance that he hasn’t reached into your thoughts yet.” She hoped.
“I’m meeting with him tonight. I need to get my things from the pack house. I want to come home.” I wasn’t going back there by myself. This ‘break’ she needed was over.
She nodded her head. “Well, it’s not like you can discover anything else now, is it? Come on, I’ll teach you how to block the thought.”
Looks like more quality time with mom. Wasn’t sure how I felt about that.
Chapter Thirty-four
"So, you're just leaving?"
"No, I'm going home." I crossed my arms stubbornly in front of Zane. There was a clear difference between just leaving and heading back home.
"Leaving is leaving," he grunted.
Had I got a lecture about running away from him?
Yes.
Had I got a lecture about not telling him how I got the bracelet off?
Yes.
Had I got a lecture on why he couldn't reach into my thoughts?
Yes.
And now, of course, I was getting a lecture for leaving the pack house.
"It's a pack house, Zane, not my home. You knew me being here was temporary." Surely, he didn't think I would be permanently living here, did he?
"So that's it then. You leave, and you're done with me?" Zane's tone had a defensive edge to it. "Why won't you tell me what is going on, Allie?"
"Because nothing IS going on. I made up with mom, and now I'm moving back home. It's no big deal. I don't see why you are making it one."
"And where does that leave us? Are we friends? Do we speak at school? What? I can't go from seeing you every day to not seeing you at all! Don't you get that, Allie?"
Did he not think it was going to be hard for me? To just withdraw from his life? It was going to hurt.
"You and I, Zane, are what we have always been. We are a big fat question mark because I don't know if we are friends, enemies, or lovers. What we are isn't explainable, and I really don't think my walking out that door and moving home is going to change us." If anything, it would make me want him more, but I wasn't going to tell him that. "So just let me go home."
***
How is it possible for everything you thought you knew to turn upside down so quickly? Sure, my family was screwed up, and yeah, things weren't perfect at home, but that wasn't what had my stomach in knots.
It was stupid Zane.
I had always intended on moving back home at some point. Heck, any rational person would assume that. I had told Zane that me moving home didn't change anything between us. That me not being at the pack house wouldn't stop us from still being friends or whatever it is we were going to be.
Clearly, Zane had thought otherwise.
I shot a glance over my shoulder. How could he pretend that I just didn't exist? My eyes snapped back to the blank paper in front of me. I couldn't do the stupid activities the teacher was asking because all I could do was eavesdrop on Zane's conversation.
What really sucked was now I couldn't even reach into his mind. The pack doctor said that my disconnection had reached a dangerous level. Mom was being a natural mother worrying over me, but it was Alpha Harris’s reaction that gobsmacked us.
He asked if I could not mention it to Zane.
Mom didn't understand, and neither did I. He also made it clear that no one was to find out Zane and I were mates.
I was getting the impression that he was ashamed of me. I mentally scoffed to myself, of course, he was. The pack didn't know I existed. I never took part in anything pack-related, and I had always made it clear that I would be leaving once I could.
I shouldn't be surprised that they were blocking me out.
"You alright, Winters?" Blake towered over me.
I couldn't remember the last time he had spoken to me. Just like the rest, he had been blocking me out, although he did it for a different reason. Funny how that reason circled back to bloody Zane.
I shrugged my shoulders. I wasn't talking much lately. Didn't really have the energy to fight or talk about pointless subjects.
"You look like shit." He slumped down in the empty chair next to me.
He looked different, his features seemed sharper. I frowned slightly. "You've changed."
He arched his eyebrows. "What you talking about?"
"Your arms look different and your face…" I couldn't pinpoint what it was, but I knew something had changed.
"Been doing a lot of work at the gym. Just drop it," he said, and the embarrassment that lingered behind his words was clear to me.
That was what it was. He had lost weight and toned up, although he already was a tank to begin with.
"You got plans for tonight?" Blake changed the subject very smoothly, and I suppressed my smile.
"Nope."
"Wanna come to ours?"
"Thought you guys wanted nothing to do with me?"
Couldn't lie and say it hadn't hurt the way they had disappeared out of my life. They were my only two friends, and then one day they were gone because of Zane. I shot a glare over my shoulder in his direction, but he didn't seem to catch it as he was too busy smirking and chatting to Ebony.
"Moved on. The question is, have you?" He had asked me one question, but his eyes were asking me another.
He was really asking if I was over whatever it was with Zane.
"Yeah, I have."
If Zane wanted to act like nothing had happened, then I could too.
Chapter Thirty-five
"You can't do that." Chase gritted his teeth while sitting on the edge of the couch. He looked about to break the controller.
Blake didn't say anything back as his car glided through the finish line.
"It's not fucking bumper cars." Chase was not taking the loss well.
I yawned and stretched out on the sofa watching the two bicker about who knocked who off the track. I knew it was lame to admit it, but I was actually enjoying this. Just laying around at their house, watching them bicker and play video games.
This beat a night home with mom any night of the week, but really, I just missed my friends.
"We're out of beer," Blake yelled from the kitchen.
"I'm not going to get more," Chase grunted and threw his feet up on the coffee table that was covered with empty cans and pizza boxes. Some things never changed.
Blake scratched his head, clearly thinking hard for a solution. Really it wasn't a hard one to figure out, but he’d had a few to drink.
His eyes finally landed on me, and I arched my eyebrows at his pointed finger.
"Allie, seeing as you are the sober one."
"And quiet one," Chase added.
"Don't give her a reason to say no, dickhead." Blake threw a sour look at his brother. "She's the solution to getting more beer."
"You know guys, for a pair of growing teenage boys, you drink too much." I faked a snobbish look. "Really, what would your parents think?"
