by Hannah Ford
“No,” he said. “Absolutely not.”
“Noah –”
“No.”
I picked up my fork and took another piece of pancake, forcing myself to eat it, even though my stomach was churning. Then I took another sip of coffee and swallowed. “Noah, he’s going to tell me what he’s going to say at the meeting.”
“So what? I don’t give a shit what that asshole’s going to say.”
“Well, you should! He’s going to be one of the voices they listen to when it comes to deciding what to do with me.”
“No one is going to decide what to do with you, Charlotte.” He stabbed his fork into his eggs angrily. “Except for me.”
“Noah. This is important to me.” I thrust my chin into the air and he sighed. “Plus, if we know what he’s going to say, we can figure out how to combat it. Think of it that way. It’s like a tactical advantage.”
“I’m going with you.”
“To meet with him?”
“Yes.”
“Noah!” I threw my hands up into the air and shook my head. “If you show up with me, it’s going to look really bad.”
“Like I give a shit. This guy is obviously trying to get into your pants, Charlotte. I will not allow you to be alone with him.”
“What?” I repeated incredulously. “Noah, he’s a therapist.”
“Oh, and a therapist can’t want one of their patients? Why the hell else does he need to meet with you on a Saturday?” He rolled his eyes and took the last bite of his pancakes. “Don’t be naïve, Charlotte. Therapists falling in love with their patients is one of the most common things in the world.”
“Every man I come in contact with doesn’t want me, Noah.”
“Yes, Charlotte, they do.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Because I am a man, and I know how men think. You are beautiful, and smart, and sexy as hell. You are everything anyone would ever want, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let anyone steal you from me.” His voice swelled with emotion on that last part, and I caught the briefest glimpse of the vulnerability that lurked behind his alpha exterior.
“So what should I tell him?” I asked, my finger hovering over the reply button. If I was going to make it there for one o’clock, we would have to go directly from here to Jason’s office – there wasn’t time to stop home first.
“Tell him we’ll be there.”
“Noah!”
He shrugged and leaned back in the booth, his shoulders thrust back in determination, as if to say take it or leave it.
I took a deep breath, trying to figure out of if there was a way to get what I wanted. I wrapped my fingers around my coffee cup, mulling things over in my mind. “I’d like to negotiate,” I said finally.
“Oh, really?” An amused smile tugged at the corner of Noah’s full lips. He draped his arms across the back of the booth. He’d finished his breakfast, his plate completely empty, and I marveled at the way he could eat what he’d just eaten and have a body that looked as if it had been carved from granite.
“Yes,” I said, swallowing nervously.
“I’m listening, counselor.”
“You take me to the meeting, but you wait in the car.”
“No.”
“Final offer,” I said.
He started to open his mouth, but I cut him off. “Noah,” I said softly. “Please, this is… this is my career, my future.”
He sighed and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table and steepling his fingers together. “I will wait in the car,” he said finally. “For ten minutes. If you are not out in ten minutes, I will come in there and get you.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
“I’m not kidding, Charlotte. Ten minutes, and then I will come into the building, throw you over my shoulder, and carry you out of there in front of everyone.” His voice was hard as steel, and I knew that as ridiculous as the thought of him throwing me over his shoulder and carrying me out of the building was, it was by no means an empty threat.
“Okay,” I said, typing a reply to Jason letting him know I would be there as Bella returned to our table and refilled our coffee.
I waited again for Noah to bring up Ryan and the pictures we’d found on the cell phone, but he didn’t.
And he still didn’t, even when we’d finished eating, even when Bella was done clearing the table and had us brought the check. It wasn’t until Noah placed his credit card on the little plastic tray and Bella had returned from running it through the reader that Noah broached the subject of Ryan Aqualino.
“Here you go,” Bella said, setting the receipt down in front of Noah. “Are you guys all set? Do you want a coffee to go or anything?”
“No, thank you,” Noah said, signing the receipt
“Do you have far to drive?” Bella asked, taking in Noah’s look. He’d left his fancy watch at home and dressed in a simple black t-shirt and jeans, but there was no getting away from the expensive haircut and the way he carried himself, with the kind of confidence that came from getting everything you wanted, whenever you wanted it, the kind of confidence that came only from power, the kind of power that came only from money, and lots of it.
“No,” he said. “Just back to Manhattan.”
“What brought you to Queens?” she asked, tucking a stray curl behind her ear.
“We came to see you, actually,” Noah said.
I watched Bella as the confusion passed over her face. “Me?” she asked. “Why me?”
“We’re lawyers,” Noah said, giving her a smile. “We’re representing Lilah Parks in her murder trial.”
The blood drained from Bella’s face, her polite smile faltering as her lips set into a thin, hard line. It was obvious from her reaction that she knew who Lilah Parks was. “I have nothing to do with that.” Her voice was clipped as she picked up the receipt Noah had just signed and shoved it into the pocket of her apron. She seemed rattled, but she didn’t tell us to get the hell out, she didn’t yell or scream or freak out.
And most importantly, she hadn’t walked away.
And that’s when I realized Noah was right – it was masterful what he’d done, making sure that we hadn’t accosted Bella with questions as soon as we’d walked in. He’d been polite and friendly to her while she’d been our server, we’d enjoyed our food, and now, Bella felt at least like she had some tiny connection with us.
“Are you sure?” Noah asked gently.
“I’m not… I can’t talk about it,” she said softly.
“I understand.” Noah took one of his business cards out of his pocket and slid it across the table. “If you change your mind, here’s how you can contact me.”
Bella shook her head no, but she grabbed the card and shoved it into her apron, then scurried off behind the counter toward the kitchen.
“That’s it?” I asked Noah once she was gone. “We came all the way out here for that?”
“You have to give people their space, Charlotte. Sometimes not pushing them is better.”
“Oh, hell no,” I said, and before I knew what I was doing, I was out of my seat and following Bella back into the kitchen, right through the door marked Employees Only.
“Charlotte!” Noah yelled behind me, but I wasn’t listening. Instead, I was weaving my way back through the kitchen, through the line cooks who paid me no mind, and following Bella’s head of dark curls right into a back storage room.
I closed the door behind me.
Bella turned around, her eyes shimmering with tears. “What the hell are you doing back here?” she asked. “You can’t be back here.”
“Please,” I said, swallowing. “Please, you have to help us. We can… we can make sure we help you, too.” I wasn’t sure if what I was saying was true, wasn’t sure if we could help her, but it was all I had.
Bella stared at me. “Is that what you think? That I need help?” She shook her head incredulously. “You come down here in your fancy clothes and your fancy car with yo
ur fancy rich boyfriend, and you think, ‘oh, look at her, she has sex for money, something must be wrong with her, she needs to be saved.’” She narrowed her eyes at me, her hands curling into fists at her sides. “I don’t need to be saved. I go to Columbia, did you know that? I take the train there every day, and guess what? Working here isn’t going to pay for my tuition, so I do some stuff on the side.” She shrugged. “Big deal. Most of the men are gorgeous, most of them know exactly how to get me off. It’s fun. So don’t you dare feel sorry for me.”
I swallowed, the heat rising high on my cheeks as I realized how judgmental I’d been. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…” I faltered as I tried to regroup. “I apologize if I made you feel judged. Trust me, I’m the last person that should be judging someone when it comes to things like that.”
She sighed and her face softened. “Look, I wish I could help you. I really do. But I really don’t have anything to say. Some clients like to get rough, it’s not… it’s just part of the job.”
“Those pictures didn’t look like rough sex, Bella,” I said. “It looked like something beyond just playing.”
She bit her lip hard, her shell-pink lipstick staining her top teeth. “It’s not… look, I feel bad for Lilah, I really do.”
“She might to go to jail, Bella,” I said. “She might end up behind bars for a very long time for something she didn’t do.” I took a step toward her. “Please, if there’s anything you can tell me about what happened, if there’s anything you know…”
Her face crumpled a little, the bravado she’d had just a moment ago almost completely gone now. “I – ”
There was a knock on the storage room door, the knob rattling.
Noah’s voice came booming through the room from the other side. “Open the door, Charlotte,” he commanded.
“Please,” I said to Bella, pleading. “Please, whatever you can tell us.”
She shook her head, and I could tell I’d lost her. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I really can’t help you.” She smoothed her curls back from her face, then rubbed away a stray bit of eyeliner from under her eyes. “I need to get back to work now.” She turned and began to walk toward the door of the storage room, adjusting her apron as she reached for the doorknob.
As she did, the back of her shirt slipped up, revealing a strip of her bare back.
And a tattoo of someone’s name.
No, not a tattoo.
A burn. A scar. A brand.
I gasped in horror as I saw what the letters carved into Bella’s back spelled out.
Lameuix.
* * *
Noah was livid, madder than I’d ever seen him.
“That was completely out of line,” he raged as we got into the car a few moments later. His hands tightened around the gearshift as he started the car and the engine roared to life.
“She was about to talk to me, Noah,” I said, yanking on my seatbelt. “Until you came rushing in and interrupted us.”
“She was not about to talk to you, Charlotte, and now she’s probably never going to talk to us, because you’ve pushed her and made her think we’re the enemy.” He gunned the engine and swerved through the streets of New York back toward Manhattan, but he was heading back toward our apartment instead of toward my school, and I had that meeting with Jason.
“You’re going the wrong way,” I said. “You need to head toward Middleton, remember?”
His jaw twitched as he took a hard right, and I gripped the handle to keep myself from sliding across the seat.
He stayed silent all the way to my school, even after he’d pulled up in front of the administration building that housed Jason’s office. Noah kept the engine running and I waited for him to say something.
But he didn’t.
“That girl had a brand on her back, Noah,” I said quietly, staring out the window. Even though it was Saturday, the campus was still busy, even if in a sleepy sort of way. “Of Lameuix’s name.”
“What?”
“Yeah,” I said, turning back toward him. “I saw it.”
His jaw tightened again, his eyes blazing. “You shouldn’t have followed her like that, Charlotte.” His tone was steely hard, his voice the picture of control. His eyes ran up my body and I shivered, wondering if he was thinking about how I was going to be punished for this.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He set a timer for ten minutes and then placed it on the dashboard. “Go to your meeting, Charlotte. If you are even one minute late, I will come in there and get you.”
“But – “
“Your time has already started.”
I sighed and got out of the car, made my way into the building, and down the hallway to Jason’s office.
I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
“Come in,” Jason called.
When I opened the door, he was sitting at his desk, looking at something on his computer. “Hi,” I said carefully, shutting the door behind me.
He nodded. “Hello. You want to take a seat?”
“I can’t stay long.” But I sat down anyway, making sure to perch on the end of the chair so that wouldn’t get the idea that I was getting too comfortable or settling in for a long talk.
Jason opened his mouth to protest, then must have thought better of it. “Okay. Then I’ll keep this brief. The disciplinary board is going to ask me at the meeting about your relationship with Noah, about what I’ve seen.”
“You can’t tell them anything,” I said, before I realized it probably wasn’t a good idea to start telling him what to do, to start off this meeting by being adversarial. “It’s patient/therapist confidentiality.”
“That’s true,” Jason said, his voice steady. “But I can tell them about what happened at the coffee shop the other day.”
“What?”
“How Noah assaulted me.”
“What does that have to do with whether or not I had an inappropriate relationship with him?”
“It shows that he feels strongly enough about you that he was willing to harm another man who was with you.”
White hot anger burned me from the inside out. “Why would you do that?” I demanded. “Why would you tell them that when you know it could hurt me?”
“Charlotte, this isn’t personal,” he said. “This isn’t an attack on you, or a sleight on you. It’s about following the rules.” He ran his hand through his hair, and rubbed his face. He sounded torn, but I couldn’t tell if it was sincere or not, couldn’t tell if he cared that what he was doing was going to potentially hurt my career.
“You might ruin my career,” I said. “Do you understand that?”
“I’m an employee of the university, Charlotte,” he said. “I can’t lie at a disciplinary hearing.”
“It’s not a disciplinary hearing. It’s just a meeting,” I said. A look of guilt flashed across Jason’s face. “What?” I demanded. “It’s not?”
“Charlotte...”
“So what?” I said, and my voice was raising now. “It’s one of those things where they tell me it’s just a meeting, and then when I get there, what? They bombard me with all kinds of questions, use whatever I say against me?”
“I don’t know what’s going to happen,” he said, but he looked away, and I could tell he knew exactly what was going to happen. He’d probably been to a million of these meetings.
“You’re lying.”
“Charlotte, what do you expect me to do?” he said. “I’m an employee of the university, I – ”
“You already said that.” I shook my head. “You’re supposed to be here to help me, not to ruin my career.”
“I didn’t ruin anything!” he said, and now his voice was raising too, as he lost his grip on his professionalism and began to get frustrated with me. “You’re the one who made these decisions, not me. If you’d been smart, you would have realized what you were doing.”
My eyes filled with tears, because of course he was
right. I was the one who’d made those decisions, the one who was responsible for putting myself in this position.
I stood up and walked toward the door, but Jason ran after me. “Charlotte,” he said. “Charlotte, come on, let’s talk about this.”
“I have nothing else to say,” I said, but I wasn’t mad at him, not really. Mostly, I was made at myself.
“If you end your relationship with him before the hearing, you can tell them it’s over.”
“That’s not going to happen.” I opened the door and went to step into the hallway, but he stepped in front of me, blocking my path.
“You’re being irrational,” Jason said. “You’re throwing everything away for what? A man? Jesus, Charlotte, do you even realize what you’re doing?”
I tried to push past him, but he grabbed at my arm. “Charlotte, please,” he said. “I just want what’s best for you. You need to think about this.” I wrenched out of his grasp and then I was running, running, running, down the hallway, pushing through a group of students huddled on the front steps and back to Noah’s car.
“What happened?” he demanded when I got in.
“Nothing,” I said, staring out the window as my eyes filled with tears. “You were right about the meeting. It’s just a way for them to get information they can use against me later.”
“Charlotte –”
“Please,” I said softly. “Please, just take me home.”
* * *
When we got back to the apartment, there was a uniformed guard standing outside the door. We’d seen him briefly on our way out to see Bella, but this time, I nodded at him and gave him a polite smile, not sure exactly what the protocol was. He didn’t nod back, leaving me to believe I’d broken some kind of cardinal rule.
“I just checked the apartment, sir,” he said. “It’s all clear.”
“Thank you, Maddox,” Noah said as he slid the key into the lock. We stepped inside, and Noah shut the door behind us. “Stay here,” he said to me, and then he walked through the apartment, double checking every room, making sure the guard hadn’t missed anything.
